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Dumped GF. She is now threatening to kill herself.

yes i could. if you actually kill yourself or try to to hurt someone that is an ultimate expression of trying to manipulate, and control that person through guilt, even after you're dead.

everyone wants to be loved, but very few know what love is.
 
Pagey said:
...Right.
In the interest of staying civil and because you appaer to have some sort of unbreakable God complex I'm not going to bother arguing.
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I dont have any god complex I am just smarter than average doe that acts purely based on emotion of empathy ignoring future consequences....

you save the girl,girl have children,children have same problem.... now by saving that girl by not making her commit suicide all her children and their children will likely commit suicide becose of the low quality dna...........

basicly you cancel ONE suicide NOW

but make many more suicides in future..... but who cares about logic or future,we are human afterall

every lifeform on earth have evolved based on DEATH of weaker dna.... thats how it works,humans abuse their power to cancel natural selections but that is faust bargain as it criples human evolution advancment


and last thing,she is problably atention whore,most people that commit suicide wont tell anybody thats fact

dunno about you but I wouldnt want to be offspring predisposed to be emotionaly unstable manipulator
 
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Pagey said:
That's not true.
I never threatened him with it but I did tell one of my exes when I was trying to kill myself - there was nothing much he could have done at that point anyway but I just wanted to hurt him with it because I'd been planning on doing it anyway and he'd been such a horrible person...
I feel absolutely dreadful about it but it's not because someone tells people she's gonna commit suicide that she won't. Every case is different and it should always be respected & paid attention to, not discarded. You don't know whether or not she means it, and could you really live with yourself if you supposed she was bluffing and in the end, she wasn't? And that's without going into the ethical/moral aspect of just letting someone die.
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It's different if you are just sharing your mental state with someone you know. But if you're saying, "Don't leave me otherwise I'll kill myself" then you should just FOAD.
 
DOB said:
I dont have any god complex I am just smarter than average doe that acts purely based on emotion of empathy ignoring future consequences....

you save the girl,girl have children,children have same problem.... now by saving that girl by not making her commit suicide all her children and their children will likely commit suicide becose of the low quality dna...........

basicly you cancel ONE suicide NOW

but make many more suicides in future..... but who cares about logic or future,we are human afterall

every lifeform on earth have evolved based on DEATH of weaker dna.... thats how it works,humans abuse their power to cancel natural selections but that is faust bargain as it criples human evolution advancment


and last thing,she is problably atention whore,most people that commit suicide wont tell anybody thats fact

dunno about you but I wouldnt want to be offspring predisposed to be emotionaly unstable manipulator
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Depression and suicidal tendencies are not at all necessarily genetic. AT ALL.
I mean ffs yes there are some predispositions sometimes but don't you think some people have just had a lot of difficulty in their lives that maybe warrants why they feel like killing themselves?! Even with predispositions, if you've had the happiest life imaginable you won't be wishing for death.
It's not up to you, or to anyone for that matter, to decide who gets to live or die.
I also really don't care whether or not you're 'smarter than average', it's an easy thing to say and doesn't change the fact that I find your argument not only morally wrong, but also, no offense, dumb.
I usually try to avoid arguments on BL but I really don't have any respect for someone who believes themselves superior to others and who thinks they have a right to say someone should die.

Foreigner said:
It's different if you are just sharing your mental state with someone you know. But if you're saying, "Don't leave me otherwise I'll kill myself" then you should just FOAD.
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I agree it's different and I agree it's a pretty low and manipulative move to threaten suicide - but no matter how much you may still hate the person for it and no matter how justified you are in being angry at them, I still don't think you should let them do it.
 
My dude I lost to a drug od showed signs of a death wish. His best friend got super pissed at me when I mentioned it. We didn't talk for years because of it.

I even still have the IM of him telling me he dreamed something horrible was going to happen and then he saw my face and he felt at peace. It really freaks me out to read it now. He mentioned it to me twice before he died and I blew him off. It was a huge part of my prolonged guilt.
 
Pagey said:
Depression and suicidal tendencies are not at all necessarily genetic.
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I agree that its not 100% but genetics play huge role if you are suicide manipulator or not

Pagey said:
I usually try to avoid arguments on BL but I really don't have any respect for someone who believes themselves superior to others and who thinks they have a right to say someone should die.
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we are overpopulated,number of humans on this planet should be way way lower... people need to die,manipulative suicide people can go ahead and be first in the line

about the superiority,its not like I am ferrari and most people are ford focus,its I am the rusty fiat panda from 80s and most people are shopping trolleys....
 
iheartthisthread said:
Silverman, I've been in your shoes... It sucks, it really does. The last time this happened to me, I texted her back once, and told her I'd send an ambulance if she wanted me too, but that I was not coming to her rescue. She is still alive, and the bullshit stopped.
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Me too. She made good on her threat but her friend called the ambulance and she had her stomach pumped... Tried to OD by guzzling down a bottle of benzos with liquor. I don't know how I'd have felt if she died, did a number on my head already to know she'd tried it and come close. Fucking horrible.

Inform someone close to her, a close friend, sibling, parents - most of the time threats like this are bullshit but there's a chance it isn't, so I think it should be taken seriously.

Do what you can in the immediate term to make sure she doesn't do it, but also, distance yourself from her. This is not a healthy post-relationship limbo for either to be in, and you above all should get the fuck away.
 
I honestly think you should just get back together with her otherwise you will be partly responsible for her doing something to herself if she is honestly suicidal. She will learn from her mistakes and change so that you two can start to be happy together - call your breaking up with her a wake up call if you will. She probably just loves you so much and just doesn't want you to leave her. She sounds like she needs you now more than ever.

Do you have to leave her? Why can't you stay with her?
 
I appreciate everyone's responses. Nearly a month has past and she is doing OK. I have not contacted her at all during this time and ignored all texts and emails. I did have a friend who lives in her apartment complex check on her and he said he saw her at the gym. At this stage her motives for making such terrible threats have become clear, and i couldn't be happier to be out of the whole situation.

As for DOB, all of your claims assume that the entirety of human potential is dictated by genetics. Fortunately, for many of us, we are so much more than our lineage would suggest. I myself am the son of a drug addict mother who OD'd and died and a manic depressive father who didn't make any threats but actually did kill himself. My current position in life is hardly indicative of these past tragedies. I am a healthy, employed and well-adjusted member of society who is in the process of applying for Doctorate of Psychology Programs. Furthermore, I am hardly unique. Individuals overcome horrible circumstances all the time. Abraham Lincoln is considered to have been a manic depressive by many, and surely would not fit into your Third-Reich Utopia. His qualifications for competency hardly need to be discussed.

Viewing the world in terms of genetic potential and purity is a very slippery slope and conditions individuals to accept unimaginable horrors that might otherwise contradict an innate moral compass. All that is needed for people to act out horrible crimes without the inconvenience of remorse is to be assured that their victims are not worthy of humanity. Just ask the Jews, African-Americans, Tutsis, Kurds, etc., etc.
 
Pagey said:
I agree it's different and I agree it's a pretty low and manipulative move to threaten suicide - but no matter how much you may still hate the person for it and no matter how justified you are in being angry at them, I still don't think you should let them do it.
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Maybe it's just that I'm good at recognizing a genuine plea for help vs. trying to manipulate me so I've never had the problem of them actually doing it. I've been with guys who have emotional issues for sure, but for someone to want to die for real they surely must be at the very end of their rope. No one I've been with has given me any reason to believe that it's genuinely that desperate.

It's not a matter of letting them or not. If they are serious about it they're going to do it no matter what I do, and if they're not serious then they're barking up the wrong tree. I won't take responsibility for that. Either way, the solution is not for me to continue being with them, it's for them to get a grip. A lot of people threaten suicide to others or just at life because they are being rebellious about not getting their own way. "If this doesn't work out I'll just kill myself..." it's a coping mechanism and amounts to little more than a tantrum. People who are seriously suicidal are the opposite, they feel like they have no way out and they are being forced into it.
 
Being "suicidal" is usually a temporary state....I've considered it, but never came out and told anyone I was thinking about it or acted on it.....I've always come to the conclusion that...

It's just not worth it! A lot of it has much to do with environmental factors and life circumstances....If a bunch of things in my life changed for the better, I don't think I'd be as depressed as I am now...I know I wouldn't! Some people get stuck in a downward spiral and end up killing themselves....There doesn't have to be a genetic pre-disposition, necessarily...
 
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