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MDMA Recovery (Stories & Support - 5)
- Thread starter BlueBull
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Cotcha Yankinov
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Jul 21, 2015
- Messages
- 2,952
I would get to a proper psychiatrist. Unfortunately, time is the answer for many of these cases of depersonalization (3 months is extremely early on) but there are specific meds that some people seem to have success with. Lamotrigine is one that has been studied a bit for depersonalization.
When depersonalization is bad it really does feel like brain damage, but I assure you that all of "you" is still tucked away in your brain - the issue with DP seems to be that important brain regions aren't communicating properly. Once the communication is reestablished you'll start to return to normal.
AntsonTheTree
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Oct 18, 2017
- Messages
- 2
Hello, first of all sorry for my writing, english is not my mother tongue 
I want to explain a bit my experience so maybe some of You have had similar experiences and can help me out.
I'm 22, I took a little bomb of pure MDMA for the first time arround mid July and I have a beautiful experience. I took it with two really close friends, We went to a party outdoors, They were taking care of me the whole time and I really really enjoy the experince. I didn?t have a bad comedown at all, I even went to work after sleep the whole morning.. just thirsty the day after, which I think is quite normal.
Almost a week later my friend came and I still have a little amount of MDMA so We went to a club and took the same amount as the last time. ( I know it was a stupid decision but and that time I didn?t realize how important is to respect time with MDMA). We were starting to dance while waiting fort the MDMA effect and forty minutes later We were fucking high. The music was phycho trance, not really my kind of music but I was enjoying it. In some point I lost my friends but I keep enjoying the party. like 15min later I started to feel very weird. I started to realize I didn?t like the environment, the people around me. Everything was spinning, I really needed to run somewhere else. I remember I was really high and scared, but very focus on get outside and relax. I finally went outside and I started to throw up and all the sudden I felt so much better. I found my friends at the entrance and We spent the rest of the night chilling outside, enjoying the MDMA to talk with each other and I could forget for the rest of the night the bad time inside the club.
I met a guy also on MDMA outside while I was with my friends. We ended up walking and talking until the morning and this guy and me connected in such a beautiful way. We changed numbers and four days later We met. The afternoon We met, at the beginning everything was fine, We were just talking about the night and staff but in some point I started to don?t like him at all. I realized He was a fucking strange guy that I would never have liked it if it had not been for the drug. I realized He was a heavy drug abuser, with kind of scary delusions of grandeur. When I realized I liked this guy on MDMA and just have my first panic attack and at that point I didn?t know what was happening to me.
I started to get paranoid asking myself, is this guy going to hurt me? I?m feeling weird, Did He put something in my drink? and things like that till I finally say to him I needed to go and I went home to see my friends. I was feeling disoriented, I started to see my environment in such a sad way..like a movie viewer.
The next day and during the next three weeks I almost couldn?t eat, I wanted to throw up every morning, I couldn?t sleep.. I had suicidal thoughts, I was thinking that I was mad and I could hurt someone so I started to spend days at bed. I had depersonalization and derealization, a lack of energy, motivation, I thought that my life was going to stay this way forever, that I had screwed up my life, everything was empty of meaning and I couldn?t enjoy anything around me.
It?s been three months now and I can say I feel better but still confuse. I can sleep well now, taking before some herbs and respecting sleep patters. I still feel very anxious and scared when I remember this guy, maybe because my panick attack happened when I was with him?
I?m eating well now, and I feel less anxious than before but I cannot be at parties, big meetings, places where the music is too laud..but I still crying almost everyday because I use to be a very happy girl all this way from three months ago it?s been really, really hard for me. I have a lack of motivation, I believe is depression. Every morning I wake up the first thing I think is I?m not still right. I need a few hours to start my day and I have mood swings during the whole day, sometimes kind of positive and active and later just feeling anxious. But since then, I didn?t have a full normal day.
I have been reading panic attack happens on the comedown, and I also know I didn?t respect the three month rule. But at this point I would like to read something inspiring or that can help me to get out of this nightmare.
thank You for reading !!
I want to explain a bit my experience so maybe some of You have had similar experiences and can help me out.
I'm 22, I took a little bomb of pure MDMA for the first time arround mid July and I have a beautiful experience. I took it with two really close friends, We went to a party outdoors, They were taking care of me the whole time and I really really enjoy the experince. I didn?t have a bad comedown at all, I even went to work after sleep the whole morning.. just thirsty the day after, which I think is quite normal.
Almost a week later my friend came and I still have a little amount of MDMA so We went to a club and took the same amount as the last time. ( I know it was a stupid decision but and that time I didn?t realize how important is to respect time with MDMA). We were starting to dance while waiting fort the MDMA effect and forty minutes later We were fucking high. The music was phycho trance, not really my kind of music but I was enjoying it. In some point I lost my friends but I keep enjoying the party. like 15min later I started to feel very weird. I started to realize I didn?t like the environment, the people around me. Everything was spinning, I really needed to run somewhere else. I remember I was really high and scared, but very focus on get outside and relax. I finally went outside and I started to throw up and all the sudden I felt so much better. I found my friends at the entrance and We spent the rest of the night chilling outside, enjoying the MDMA to talk with each other and I could forget for the rest of the night the bad time inside the club.
I met a guy also on MDMA outside while I was with my friends. We ended up walking and talking until the morning and this guy and me connected in such a beautiful way. We changed numbers and four days later We met. The afternoon We met, at the beginning everything was fine, We were just talking about the night and staff but in some point I started to don?t like him at all. I realized He was a fucking strange guy that I would never have liked it if it had not been for the drug. I realized He was a heavy drug abuser, with kind of scary delusions of grandeur. When I realized I liked this guy on MDMA and just have my first panic attack and at that point I didn?t know what was happening to me.
I started to get paranoid asking myself, is this guy going to hurt me? I?m feeling weird, Did He put something in my drink? and things like that till I finally say to him I needed to go and I went home to see my friends. I was feeling disoriented, I started to see my environment in such a sad way..like a movie viewer.
The next day and during the next three weeks I almost couldn?t eat, I wanted to throw up every morning, I couldn?t sleep.. I had suicidal thoughts, I was thinking that I was mad and I could hurt someone so I started to spend days at bed. I had depersonalization and derealization, a lack of energy, motivation, I thought that my life was going to stay this way forever, that I had screwed up my life, everything was empty of meaning and I couldn?t enjoy anything around me.
It?s been three months now and I can say I feel better but still confuse. I can sleep well now, taking before some herbs and respecting sleep patters. I still feel very anxious and scared when I remember this guy, maybe because my panick attack happened when I was with him?
I?m eating well now, and I feel less anxious than before but I cannot be at parties, big meetings, places where the music is too laud..but I still crying almost everyday because I use to be a very happy girl all this way from three months ago it?s been really, really hard for me. I have a lack of motivation, I believe is depression. Every morning I wake up the first thing I think is I?m not still right. I need a few hours to start my day and I have mood swings during the whole day, sometimes kind of positive and active and later just feeling anxious. But since then, I didn?t have a full normal day.
I have been reading panic attack happens on the comedown, and I also know I didn?t respect the three month rule. But at this point I would like to read something inspiring or that can help me to get out of this nightmare.
thank You for reading !!
AntsonTheTree
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Oct 18, 2017
- Messages
- 2
Hello, first of all sorry for my writing, english is not my mother tongue
I want to explain a bit my experience so maybe some of You have had similar experiences and can help me out.
I took a little bomb of pure MDMA for the first time arround mid July and I have a beautiful experience. I took it with two really close friends, We went to a party outdoors, They were taking care of me the whole time and I really really enjoy the experince. I didn?t have a bad comedown at all, I even went to work after sleep the whole morning.. just thirsty the day after, which I think is quite normal.
Almost a week later my friend came and I still have a little amount of MDMA so We went to a club and took it. ( I know it was a stupid decision but and that time I didn?t realize how important is to respect time with MDMA). We were starting to dance while waiting fort the MDMA effect and forty minutes We were fucking high. The music was phycho trance, not really my kind of music but I was enjoying it. In some point I lost my friends but I keep enjoying the party. like 15min later I started to feel very weird. I started to realize I didn?t like the environment, the people around me. Everything was spinning, I really needed to run somewhere else. I remember I was really high and scared, but very focus on get outside and relax. I finally went outside and I started to throw up and all the sudden I felt so much better. I found my friends at the entrance and We spent the rest of the night chilling outside, enjoying the MDMA to talk with each other and I could forget for the rest of the night the bad time inside the club.
I met a guy also on MDMA outside while I was with my friends. We ended up walking and talking until the morning and this guy and me connected in such a beautiful way. We changed numbers and four days later We met. The afternoon We met, at the beginning everything was fine, We were just talking about the night and staff but in some point I started to don?t like him at all. I realized He was a fucking strange guy that I would never have liked it if it had not been for the drug. I realized He was a heavy drug abuser, with kind of scary delusions of grandeur. When I realized I liked this guy on MDMA and just have my first panic attack and at that point I didn?t know what was happening to me.
I started to get paranoid asking myself, is this guy going to hurt me? I?m feeling weird, Did He put something in my drink? and things like that till I finally say to him I needed to go and I went home to see my friends. I was feeling disoriented, I started to see my environment in such a sad way..like a movie viewer.
The next day and during the next three weeks I almost couldn?t eat, I wanted to throw up every morning, I couldn?t sleep.. I had suicidal thoughts, I was thinking that I was mad and I could hurt someone so I started to spend days at bed. I had depersonalization and derealization, a lack of energy, motivation, I thought that my life was going to stay this way forever, that I had screwed up my life, everything was empty of meaning and I couldn?t enjoy anything around me.
It?s been three months now and I can say I feel better but still confuse. I can sleep well now, taking before some herbs and respecting sleep patters. I still feel very anxious and scared when I remember this guy, maybe because my panick attack happened when I was with him?
I?m eating well now, and I feel less anxious than before but I cannot be at parties, big meetings, places where the music is too laud..but I still crying almost everyday because I use to be a very happy girl all this way from three months ago it?s been really, really hard for me. I have a lack of motivation, I believe is depression. Every morning I wake up the first thing I think is I?m not still right. I need a few hours to start my day and I have mood swings during the whole day, sometimes kind of positive and active and later just feeling anxious. But since then, I didn?t have a full normal day.
I have been reading panic attack happens on the comedown, and I also know I didn?t respect the three month rule. But at this point I would like to read something inspiring or that can help me to get out of this nightmare.
thank You for reading !!
I want to explain a bit my experience so maybe some of You have had similar experiences and can help me out.
I took a little bomb of pure MDMA for the first time arround mid July and I have a beautiful experience. I took it with two really close friends, We went to a party outdoors, They were taking care of me the whole time and I really really enjoy the experince. I didn?t have a bad comedown at all, I even went to work after sleep the whole morning.. just thirsty the day after, which I think is quite normal.
Almost a week later my friend came and I still have a little amount of MDMA so We went to a club and took it. ( I know it was a stupid decision but and that time I didn?t realize how important is to respect time with MDMA). We were starting to dance while waiting fort the MDMA effect and forty minutes We were fucking high. The music was phycho trance, not really my kind of music but I was enjoying it. In some point I lost my friends but I keep enjoying the party. like 15min later I started to feel very weird. I started to realize I didn?t like the environment, the people around me. Everything was spinning, I really needed to run somewhere else. I remember I was really high and scared, but very focus on get outside and relax. I finally went outside and I started to throw up and all the sudden I felt so much better. I found my friends at the entrance and We spent the rest of the night chilling outside, enjoying the MDMA to talk with each other and I could forget for the rest of the night the bad time inside the club.
I met a guy also on MDMA outside while I was with my friends. We ended up walking and talking until the morning and this guy and me connected in such a beautiful way. We changed numbers and four days later We met. The afternoon We met, at the beginning everything was fine, We were just talking about the night and staff but in some point I started to don?t like him at all. I realized He was a fucking strange guy that I would never have liked it if it had not been for the drug. I realized He was a heavy drug abuser, with kind of scary delusions of grandeur. When I realized I liked this guy on MDMA and just have my first panic attack and at that point I didn?t know what was happening to me.
I started to get paranoid asking myself, is this guy going to hurt me? I?m feeling weird, Did He put something in my drink? and things like that till I finally say to him I needed to go and I went home to see my friends. I was feeling disoriented, I started to see my environment in such a sad way..like a movie viewer.
The next day and during the next three weeks I almost couldn?t eat, I wanted to throw up every morning, I couldn?t sleep.. I had suicidal thoughts, I was thinking that I was mad and I could hurt someone so I started to spend days at bed. I had depersonalization and derealization, a lack of energy, motivation, I thought that my life was going to stay this way forever, that I had screwed up my life, everything was empty of meaning and I couldn?t enjoy anything around me.
It?s been three months now and I can say I feel better but still confuse. I can sleep well now, taking before some herbs and respecting sleep patters. I still feel very anxious and scared when I remember this guy, maybe because my panick attack happened when I was with him?
I?m eating well now, and I feel less anxious than before but I cannot be at parties, big meetings, places where the music is too laud..but I still crying almost everyday because I use to be a very happy girl all this way from three months ago it?s been really, really hard for me. I have a lack of motivation, I believe is depression. Every morning I wake up the first thing I think is I?m not still right. I need a few hours to start my day and I have mood swings during the whole day, sometimes kind of positive and active and later just feeling anxious. But since then, I didn?t have a full normal day.
I have been reading panic attack happens on the comedown, and I also know I didn?t respect the three month rule. But at this point I would like to read something inspiring or that can help me to get out of this nightmare.
thank You for reading !!
Hey gang, just wanted to check in. I've had HPPD/LTC for about a year and a few months. I'm high functioning thanks to zolof and I hold a well paid job. Let me know if anyone wants to chat. I had this pretty bad at first. Hit me up on pm. Thanks.
How you been man? Things improving?
Regrets9995
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 27, 2017
- Messages
- 57
Hi guys, 10 months and a bit for me and it really is getting better. New job is working out well and I feel good in myself even if some symptoms still persist. Read some of the new posts and I really can empathise with the feeling that your entire personality has been erased, but you will come back. Get in therapy, think about meds if you really need them and focus on bettering yourself, you will end up better than you were before.
FirstTimeLTC
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Oct 30, 2017
- Messages
- 1
Hey guys,first time poster long time lurker.
First of all,i wanted to thank you all for sharing your experiences and tips on how overcome this nightmare.
Anyway,here's my story:
*22,male, always been the life of the party, super friendly, talkative, the bubble of positive energy and super confident*
It all started on Oct 2016 at a party when i took my first pill.
The night went amazing and i fell in love with it.
I became taking pills almost every weekend.
The comedowns were not that harsh,usually lasting 2 days then everything was back to normal.
I became even more confident and i could connect with almost everybody. Had a full time job which was a lil stressing so that was my sweet escape.
80% of the time i didn't mix it with booze,only water to keep me hydrated,but started mixing with weed.
Fast forward till May when i had 5 days off from work and since there was a 3-days party i popped like 4 pills,along with a lot of booze before,smoking weed and took 1 line of speed.
The comedown this time lasted a little longer,around 4 days then i was back to normal.
Then the summer came.
I was always out partying then working and missing some sleep.
The job didn’t satisfied me anymore so in mid June i quitted.
Then in July this big festival came and i was reckless.
Only slept ~12Hrs in 3 days and took around 5 pills and a line of coke. After the festival ended i came back still trippin to a friend's house and ended up snorting 2 big lines of ket and slept after 32Hrs.
Then the comedown lasted longer. I was more and more tired and spent most of my days sleeping.
Little did i know that was the depression crawling.
At the end of July there were 2 big parties and i ended up there popping pills.
After the last one, when i arrived home still tripping i saw myself in the mirror and i was shocked.
I could barely recognise myself,i lost about 4 kg( i was always a skinny boy,never had more than 52 and less than 49 but this time i had 45) and i decided to stop.
So a little recap:
As far as i can remember i took ~35 pills,1 line of coke,1 line of speed, 2 lines of ket along with a lot of alcohol and weed.
Then in August all hell broke.
Depression, Insomnia, DP/DR, Anxiety, Panic attacks and almost everything except HPPD.
So i spoke with some friends who had been using for way more longer than me and they said they are all just fine and i just need to relax, “it’s all in your head”. I thought i was going insane.
The pain was too real so i used Dr Google. Bad mistake. I found out that i had done irreversible brain damage and drained out all of my serotonin,you know the stories. My heart was going crazy and then i started going to doctors.
After multiple tests everything was normal.
Even some doctors were shocked that at 45 kg and 173 cm i am a healthy patient.
Then they send me to a psych on 22 August.
I’ve done some research on AD’s and since i had nothing to lose i came clean and he put me on Mirtazapine 15mg.
After a long time i slept for 13H like a baby. But when i woke up everything was worse than before. I became suicidal. I literally just prayed to die in my sleep. I had 3 friends who were by my side all this time,supporting me and i just felt dead inside. No emotions,nothing.
Then a miracle happened and i found you guys.
And you gave me hope.
So by the end of September i switched to another psych and she added Citalopram 10mg, Alprazolam 0.5 mg along with vitamins and minerals( vit B1, B6 and B12, Calcium, Magnesium, Zinc, Iron and Folic Acid).
First week was hell all over again,then in the second week my emotions were back and most of the symptoms disappeared.
I kept reading your stories and i felt motivated.
Then the Mirt kinda stopped working and i’m slowly getting off of it.
Since the LTC started i stayed clean from caffeine/weed/booze.
I could say that i’m 50% “cured”.
Symptoms that i still have?
Brain fog,muscle twitching,trouble concentrating, short term memory issues, back pain, sometimes numbness in my arms/legs.
Where i am now?
Going out, socialising, taking long walks, avoiding demanding/stressful situations atm, reading past threads( not trying to find a quick cure,but keeping up with the stories, learning new things, getting excited about your ups, feeling bad about your downs),making plans for the future, laughing this thing off, warning/comforting others who are still experiencing some LTC symptoms, rediscovering my old/new self, taking baby steps, not pushing myself too hard, meditating, focusing on the bright side of events and the list can go on.(i’ve probably already bored you,told ya i was talkative haha)
Words cannot express how much i thank you for existing, trying as best as you can and keeping the hope alive.
I think everybody who is struggling with this hell right now should read @Cotcha’s posts from previous threads and the “old gang” as they made me realise i haven’t fucked up that bad and maybe most of it all in my head.
For me it’s working with meds(guess i wasn’t that tough to do it the natural way haha).
If anyone wants to chat or having a rough moment and just want to vent it off at someone,don’t be shy and pm me :D.
Lots of love and positive vibes.
Keep going and don’t let the mind trick you that you aren’t strong enough to overcome this. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
P.S: Thanks for reading my long ass essay.
Cheers.
First of all,i wanted to thank you all for sharing your experiences and tips on how overcome this nightmare.
Anyway,here's my story:
*22,male, always been the life of the party, super friendly, talkative, the bubble of positive energy and super confident*
It all started on Oct 2016 at a party when i took my first pill.
The night went amazing and i fell in love with it.
I became taking pills almost every weekend.
The comedowns were not that harsh,usually lasting 2 days then everything was back to normal.
I became even more confident and i could connect with almost everybody. Had a full time job which was a lil stressing so that was my sweet escape.
80% of the time i didn't mix it with booze,only water to keep me hydrated,but started mixing with weed.
Fast forward till May when i had 5 days off from work and since there was a 3-days party i popped like 4 pills,along with a lot of booze before,smoking weed and took 1 line of speed.
The comedown this time lasted a little longer,around 4 days then i was back to normal.
Then the summer came.
I was always out partying then working and missing some sleep.
The job didn’t satisfied me anymore so in mid June i quitted.
Then in July this big festival came and i was reckless.
Only slept ~12Hrs in 3 days and took around 5 pills and a line of coke. After the festival ended i came back still trippin to a friend's house and ended up snorting 2 big lines of ket and slept after 32Hrs.
Then the comedown lasted longer. I was more and more tired and spent most of my days sleeping.
Little did i know that was the depression crawling.
At the end of July there were 2 big parties and i ended up there popping pills.
After the last one, when i arrived home still tripping i saw myself in the mirror and i was shocked.
I could barely recognise myself,i lost about 4 kg( i was always a skinny boy,never had more than 52 and less than 49 but this time i had 45) and i decided to stop.
So a little recap:
As far as i can remember i took ~35 pills,1 line of coke,1 line of speed, 2 lines of ket along with a lot of alcohol and weed.
Then in August all hell broke.
Depression, Insomnia, DP/DR, Anxiety, Panic attacks and almost everything except HPPD.
So i spoke with some friends who had been using for way more longer than me and they said they are all just fine and i just need to relax, “it’s all in your head”. I thought i was going insane.
The pain was too real so i used Dr Google. Bad mistake. I found out that i had done irreversible brain damage and drained out all of my serotonin,you know the stories. My heart was going crazy and then i started going to doctors.
After multiple tests everything was normal.
Even some doctors were shocked that at 45 kg and 173 cm i am a healthy patient.
Then they send me to a psych on 22 August.
I’ve done some research on AD’s and since i had nothing to lose i came clean and he put me on Mirtazapine 15mg.
After a long time i slept for 13H like a baby. But when i woke up everything was worse than before. I became suicidal. I literally just prayed to die in my sleep. I had 3 friends who were by my side all this time,supporting me and i just felt dead inside. No emotions,nothing.
Then a miracle happened and i found you guys.
And you gave me hope.
So by the end of September i switched to another psych and she added Citalopram 10mg, Alprazolam 0.5 mg along with vitamins and minerals( vit B1, B6 and B12, Calcium, Magnesium, Zinc, Iron and Folic Acid).
First week was hell all over again,then in the second week my emotions were back and most of the symptoms disappeared.
I kept reading your stories and i felt motivated.
Then the Mirt kinda stopped working and i’m slowly getting off of it.
Since the LTC started i stayed clean from caffeine/weed/booze.
I could say that i’m 50% “cured”.
Symptoms that i still have?
Brain fog,muscle twitching,trouble concentrating, short term memory issues, back pain, sometimes numbness in my arms/legs.
Where i am now?
Going out, socialising, taking long walks, avoiding demanding/stressful situations atm, reading past threads( not trying to find a quick cure,but keeping up with the stories, learning new things, getting excited about your ups, feeling bad about your downs),making plans for the future, laughing this thing off, warning/comforting others who are still experiencing some LTC symptoms, rediscovering my old/new self, taking baby steps, not pushing myself too hard, meditating, focusing on the bright side of events and the list can go on.(i’ve probably already bored you,told ya i was talkative haha)
Words cannot express how much i thank you for existing, trying as best as you can and keeping the hope alive.
I think everybody who is struggling with this hell right now should read @Cotcha’s posts from previous threads and the “old gang” as they made me realise i haven’t fucked up that bad and maybe most of it all in my head.
For me it’s working with meds(guess i wasn’t that tough to do it the natural way haha).
If anyone wants to chat or having a rough moment and just want to vent it off at someone,don’t be shy and pm me :D.
Lots of love and positive vibes.
Keep going and don’t let the mind trick you that you aren’t strong enough to overcome this. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
P.S: Thanks for reading my long ass essay.
Cheers.
sick_guy
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 27, 2017
- Messages
- 55
Anybody have success, 100% or so, recovery story to share, or could paste some links to known success story? I really need some reassuring and hope...
I thought that I'm making progress, but I don't really see any in last few weeks... Anybody had jaw muscle tension that disappeared? Or recurring nausea? Or that fucking weird feeling deep in my head, like, I don't know, constant mild brain zap? I don't know if it's accurate, I didn't have typical brain zaps, but basing on descriptions, it feels a little like them, but light and constant. Weird tension deep in brain.
It's two months and few days since I took 300 mg of M, and my life changed into that damn nightmare.
I can work, but this is so exhausting... I'm not capable to live like that in a long run...
25 y.o. male, tried M once before, and two times LSD, but in low doses.
I thought that I'm making progress, but I don't really see any in last few weeks... Anybody had jaw muscle tension that disappeared? Or recurring nausea? Or that fucking weird feeling deep in my head, like, I don't know, constant mild brain zap? I don't know if it's accurate, I didn't have typical brain zaps, but basing on descriptions, it feels a little like them, but light and constant. Weird tension deep in brain.
It's two months and few days since I took 300 mg of M, and my life changed into that damn nightmare.
I can work, but this is so exhausting... I'm not capable to live like that in a long run...
25 y.o. male, tried M once before, and two times LSD, but in low doses.
Last edited:
Yeah same here....I guess if were not heading backwards then that's considered forward...my mental symptoms are back to baseline but it's the minor physical ones and visual ones that are still lingering.....
In other news I can drink a little bit of coffee and feel alright although it might affect my Tinnitus temporarily not sure
Hey man. I felt really messed up after taking ~500mg in 3 weeks. I guess I have quite a low tolerance.
It took a solid 3.5 months for me to get better. I felt as if I was in a fucking dream. I would wake up every morning hopeing to be awake and see that I became normal... but no.. the fog and dullnest persisted.. I didn't want to meet anyone, speak with anyone, I just wanted to be fucking normal again.. slow and steady, I began speaking with some friends who understood me. I recieved their love and I began working out. Cardio every day. I also improved my diet and stopped drinking alcohol.
4 months after, I feel really good.. my mind is razor sharp.. the only lingering issue is tinnitus.. the ringing in my ears...
Basically, don't worry, go out, have fun, speak with people, work out and DON'T LINGER ON IT.. there is no magic cure.. stop looking online for a quick cure.. time will heal.. but I promise you, you will be fine
Cotcha Yankinov
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Jul 21, 2015
- Messages
- 2,952
Some of the symptoms that people experience seem to be due to cranial nerve dysfunction and are not actually related to the brain (the brain has no sensation), I hope this may reassure you a little bit.
My jaw tension has gotten better as my neck problems have gotten better.
Regrets9995
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 27, 2017
- Messages
- 57
@sick_guy symptoms are still there but don't interfere with life any more. Memory, the fog, sexual symptoms have all improved and continue to improve but bad days do still happen. Feel so much more like myself though.
sick_guy
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 27, 2017
- Messages
- 55
Thanks man, this is a kind of post that I'm looking for, when I check out this thread 5 times a day... Because there are so many stories with people struggling with this shit for years... Thank you, you gave me some hope.
I also stopped drinking any alcohol or coffee, I went to the gim few times, but exercising with nausea is really hard. I think it might not be related directly to LTC, but maybe with stomach ulcers caused by lots of stress in first few weeks. So I'll go to gastroenterologist soon.
Thank you very much. I know that there are no receptors in brain, just wanted to describe how it feels. It's really reasurring to read that physical symptoms like these can also subside.
Thanks man. I accept that I will struggle with these symptoms for some time, just wanted to hear that they continue to improve even after a long time.
Hi guys,
Also just checking in... I'm now 14 months in. Think the last time I posted on here was at 10 months. Been to CBT and been on mirtazapine for 4-5 months now. Taken the advice of the therapist and tried to "think away" the symptoms as apparently they're all anxiety.
I've been drinking nearly every week for the last 4-5 months and tried to completely remove the LTC from my mind - just to see if it actually was psychological, I haven't even looked on here, and i have improved marginally. The worst symptom to affect me still is the constant dizziness. I also permanently feel like I'm about to have a brain zap, and my memory is still shit, along with anxiety (which I feel is mainly due to the dizziness and being unable to think properly at times). So I do think a lot of this is definitely physical, I imagined I'd be getting better at about 10-11 months so wondering how long it's going to take now.
Also just checking in... I'm now 14 months in. Think the last time I posted on here was at 10 months. Been to CBT and been on mirtazapine for 4-5 months now. Taken the advice of the therapist and tried to "think away" the symptoms as apparently they're all anxiety.
I've been drinking nearly every week for the last 4-5 months and tried to completely remove the LTC from my mind - just to see if it actually was psychological, I haven't even looked on here, and i have improved marginally. The worst symptom to affect me still is the constant dizziness. I also permanently feel like I'm about to have a brain zap, and my memory is still shit, along with anxiety (which I feel is mainly due to the dizziness and being unable to think properly at times). So I do think a lot of this is definitely physical, I imagined I'd be getting better at about 10-11 months so wondering how long it's going to take now.
shouldvestayedhome
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 19, 2017
- Messages
- 113
Hey MYH1234 do you still have those weird sensations in your head?
Hey guys,
So for a few days last week i got better. Everything was cured, i felt 100% normal but then it all slowly came back, the head pressure, the HPPD, the DP... Really just randomly. I didn't change anything in my diet, everything was the same apart from, I had a swollen lymph node in the back of my neck... Could this mean something?
So for a few days last week i got better. Everything was cured, i felt 100% normal but then it all slowly came back, the head pressure, the HPPD, the DP... Really just randomly. I didn't change anything in my diet, everything was the same apart from, I had a swollen lymph node in the back of my neck... Could this mean something?
Hey man, yeah I do, if I sit still and concentrate I can feel my head like flowing and pulsing, weird pressure sensation at the front and sides of my head too. It's better than it was but I'd say only 40% better than a few months ago. Very intermittent as well, sometimes it'll feel horrible to the point where I can't function, other times ill forget about it.
shouldvestayedhome
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 19, 2017
- Messages
- 113
I am sorry to hear that. I have a constant burning sensation in the back of my head. Mine has also gotten better with time but it decreased about 20% in the last 3 months. I hope we can recover from this!
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