You're very sweet Yuba, I am honestly just happy when you're happy and doing well.
Ash.
Ash.
When will I feel normal
- Thread starter yubacity
- Start date
My mom's cooking the best.I hid my use when I was 15 in the states.Crank is one hell of a drug but 3 years of daily use days of not sleeping I just had a mini breakdown.The brown was easy to hide I used but went to work in just lucky I can function while using.I think after nearly 3 decades of daily use I have to get used to normal life.Tell you the truth I miss what I used to be.I was a chilled out person.I sometimes think how I can stay clean forever.How you doing mate do you feel good.
How you doing ash how you coping.I go on different threads and see how you helping others.For me you someone that snaps me out whenever I feeling like using.Its weird how one time I was going to use you snapped me out of it.You got a good heart
You guys are like a family to me, I want the best for all of you and try to help the best way I can. I think kindness is terribly under rated in today's world.
I'm glad I am able to help you, you and I are friends, and real friends are honest and are loyal and will really be there when their friend needs them.
And you can quit the cigarettes once you're not under so much stress, one thing at a time. I'm glad your momma's on her way.
Be kind and patient with yourself, you're really doing a good thing for yourself and I know it's hard but it won't be like this forever Yuba.
Ash.
I'm glad I am able to help you, you and I are friends, and real friends are honest and are loyal and will really be there when their friend needs them.
And you can quit the cigarettes once you're not under so much stress, one thing at a time. I'm glad your momma's on her way.
Be kind and patient with yourself, you're really doing a good thing for yourself and I know it's hard but it won't be like this forever Yuba.
Ash.
Ashley you asked me if I deleted dealers numbers.Ihave not and I cant get myself to do it.Thats the crazy thing they like my safety net.Im just thinking to myself am I not deleting their number because iu aint serious about being clean.I have done so much pregabs today that im actually fucked and I love it.I am lucky that I dont get to bad a wd on them just some anxiety and stiff legs for a couple of days.Have a good day ash how the pain problems going did your kidney infection get better.Also I apologise about how I structure my sentences when I read them back they not seem right.This is a result about either being to fucked act school or a mates house.im not dumb but I cant structure sentences
You are similar to me Ashley im not boasting but I help anyone.The amount of time I given money to my friends that use I not want anyone to suffer wd.I was lucky I could help;p them.I never wish bad on anyone.Just told a lie there I want the people that robbed my pal when he was on the sofa dead of a od to die a horrible fucking death.I will help you whenever you need it I keep saying it but you kept me clean with your advice.My dear mom see blaming my dad for my problems apart from m,y sister who was spoilt rotten by him.Its not his fault he made me a better father.I have never laid a hand on my kids.
Good morning everyone how is it going.My wife and mom will be here in 5 hours 20 mins.Got the fridge packed with food my wife favourite cherry bake wells and my moms custard cream biscuits.Have not gone to the Indian butchers will go with mom when she with me because he also sells ground poppy pods I did not what that headfuck.Lying in bed smoking joint writing this and feeling really good.Today is going to be one of those good days I can feel it will think im normal again until the cravings return.I maybe should not be so cocky but im proud of myself and so happy this forum is here.Because these cravings were so bad and just would not stop but with support from here and shitloads of lyrica and weed I did not relapse.
Just a quick question on here.My friend went to India for nearly 5 weeks.During that time he was drinking poppy pod tea or Indian raw opium.He back yesterday so it's day 2 without opium.He is having no wd symptoms.Is his wd gonna set in later or has he been lucky he not get wd I hoping he won't.
Good morning Yuba,
Yay I'm happy they will be there for you soon!! And you are so thoughtful to have bought their favorite pastries for them!!! Very proud you are hanging in there and it will be nice for you to have them with you for support and to keep you busy and out of trouble.
Have a great day with you lovely wife and your momma YUBA!!
Ash.
Yay I'm happy they will be there for you soon!! And you are so thoughtful to have bought their favorite pastries for them!!! Very proud you are hanging in there and it will be nice for you to have them with you for support and to keep you busy and out of trouble.
Have a great day with you lovely wife and your momma YUBA!!
Ash.
Hows it going ash you having a good day hope you are.IGood morning Yuba,
Yay I'm happy they will be there for you soon!! And you are so thoughtful to have bought their favorite pastries for them!!! Very proud you are hanging in there and it will be nice for you to have them with you for support and to keep you busy and out of trouble.
Have a great day with you lovely wife and your momma YUBA!!
Ash.
Sorry about that I hit the reply button to soon.I am having a great day the two women I love most are with me.My poor mom her eyes were puffy from crying first thing she did was hug and kiss me then checked my arms to see if any marks.My wife gave me the big hug got to follow punjabi tradition no kissing infront of parents.I have never seen my parents kiss most I seen my dad do is place hand on moms back imagine the shock when I found out how babies are made.Looking at my wife I cant imagine someone loving a women more.We have gone from each being 15 year olds to her buying wrinkle cream to my body showing effects of nearly 3 decades of drug use.Have a good day ash im hoping for a bit of action tonight but she is tired ill try my special hug ninety per cent chance of getting a no but im still hopingGood morning Yuba,
Yay I'm happy they will be there for you soon!! And you are so thoughtful to have bought their favorite pastries for them!!! Very proud you are hanging in there and it will be nice for you to have them with you for support and to keep you busy and out of trouble.
Have a great day with you lovely wife and your momma YUBA!!
Ash.
How is is it going over there now that the ladies are with you Yuba??
I hope you're having a nice day!!
Hugs,
Ash.
I hope you're having a nice day!!
Hugs,
Ash.
How you doing ash hope life is good.Im doing real well mood has improved.The ladies are busy cooking sarson the saag which is a punjabi spinach dish that takes a few hours to cook.Im lying on the sofa listening to Aerosmith's toys in the attic.There will be one more lady in the house tomorrow my friend who died of a od his wife flying here from Ireland to tie things up.I told her ill pick her up and stay at my house with her boys.Once my mom goes back me and my other half will tour Europe Germany Spain and Italy.We not been just the two of us since my eldest is born.I had made a mistake being on my own thank you and rio who kept me from relapse.My mom has got better since knowing I was not on the needle.Her fear was I might od or share a needle.It felt so good last night just having my wife arm around me and feeling her breath on my back while sleeping.Im such a negative thinker even feeling good I still scared how the last cravings had me ready to use again.But the important thing I did not relapse thank you ash and thanks rio.Hope you have a good day where you are im guessing its midday.
Oh that's so nice Yuba!!
Have fun on your vacay when you go!! I think it's great that you are having your buddies wife come with her boys. Although sad too, you know what I mean. I'm glad you're staying strong!!
Have a great day Yuba!!
Ash.
Have fun on your vacay when you go!! I think it's great that you are having your buddies wife come with her boys. Although sad too, you know what I mean. I'm glad you're staying strong!!
Have a great day Yuba!!
Ash.
How you doing ash hope you good.Its good to have them down.I know what you mean when you said sad.One of his boys reminds me of my mate.Im feeling a little down but not craving so that good.Have a good day my friend.
I'm doing well, thanks for asking Yuba, glad you're all having a good time together!!!
Hugs,
Ash.
Hugs,
Ash.
How you doing ash how is your pain management going.Well I'm doing good wife and mates wife going to take her kids to theme.It will just be me and my mom.I think the relationship between me and my mom and siblings has changed.They treating me with kid gloves.My brothers have rang me everyday and my sister wants me to move to seattle where her and her family are.That not be happening I love Yuba city furthest I'd m9ve from there is Sacramento.While I'm typing this my wife getting changed.I am such a lucky guy she not just got the beauty but got a great heart loyal to me beyond belief.They way I'm feeling now is now the time for me to repay that loyalty by keeping clean.This will sound soppy but I just want to grow old together raise our kids hit old age and hope I go before her.