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The Suicide Support Thread

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Swear on my fucking dick everyone is turning against me.

I've made mistakes and fucked up too many times. Really don't know what to do right now.


I'm experiencing a complete mind-fuck and I have no idea what to do from this point onwards.
 
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Take a deep breath... step back and let life continue. Hurt, but please don't kill yourself. We all have the ability to grasp the ambition to envision what we want out of life and truly pursue it, whether we fail or not.
 
badfish45 said:
Sometimes consciousness is too much.
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Ain't that the fucking truth. :\

I was drawn to clicking on this thread because of how I feel right now, and it's ironic to see that posted because the phrase "we drank/used to ease the pain of existing" has been reverberating through my brain lately. I can't stop future tripping and the problem is that even after 11 months off drugs I don't see a future for myself that I desire.

/keepin it real.
 
I keep thinking I should just die but then I tell myself not to quit. Going to buy a lottery and a beer right now. Obviously I won't win a few million dollars but I'll throw away a dollar just to have some hope, lol
 
Nothing wrong with buying cheap lotto tickets, someone's gotta win. :) I know a guy who is pretty out of control with those scratch-off instant win tickets though. He'll drop $100 a day in the morning, he has a pattern where he gets X of this kind and X of this kind at this one particular gas station, and then he buys more with whatever he wins from them in this complex pattern. He comes out significantly ahead sometimes but it all seems quite strangely compulsive to me... and he was on the verge of getting evicted when he told me about it too (for unrelated reasons... I think).
 
My life is just pointless. everything seems out to get me and my friends say that I am starting to look like shit, my resolve is breaking, what do I do?
 
sadkid said:
My life is just pointless. everything seems out to get me and my friends say that I am starting to look like shit, my resolve is breaking, what do I do?
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I know that feeling, when it seems like the universe is working against you... What's gotten me through id focusing on wishing with my whole heart for something good to happen, and it normally works. Whether its actually happening or its just my attention being refocused I'm not entirely sure. IMOyourfriends dodon't seem to be helping much right now, maybe they're trying to motivate you?
 
Please anyone who knows doomed2pain send her messages of support please if you read this.

She needs to know she is needed on this earth and any kind words can be helpful.

Thanks bluelight, show that our community can pull together to help someone please.
 
r.e.m.f.t.w

i ant take much more of this physical and emotional torment. my .22lr has been looking so tempting as a speedy exit from all those ive disappointed. all those who believed in me. just wanna pull the trigger. fuck the hurtm, fuck it.
 
Just because someone might be disappointed with you it doesn't mean they want you dead. It's a speedy exit and will end your pain but it will transfer it to others, ask yourself if that's what you really want.

There's almost always a way out of the torment and pain, you just need to reach out for support from wherever it is available and take as much of it as possible. Never be ashamed to ask for help.
 
omen_owen mk2 said:
Just because someone might be disappointed with you it doesn't mean they want you dead. It's a speedy exit and will end your pain but it will transfer it to others, ask yourself if that's what you really want.

There's almost always a way out of the torment and pain, you just need to reach out for support from wherever it is available and take as much of it as possible. Never be ashamed to ask for help.
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Thanks. I have one reason at stopping me it's my mom. No way I could do it to her. But still don't feel worthy of help.
 
Dude a lot of people would be sad if you died. I spend a solid couple hours every day lurking on BL and I will say with all honesty no bs that you would be definitely missed on here, you post some seriously funny stuff and you're truly a valued member of this community.

If some dude on the internet halfway around the world thinks this, imagine what the people IRL must think of you.

Hang in there bud send me a pm if you need to chat anytime. <3
 
Whosajiggawaaa said:
Thanks. I have one reason at stopping me it's my mom. No way I could do it to her. But still don't feel worthy of help.
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Everyone is worthy of help. Even people who have done the most terrible of crimes, if they are remorseful, are worthy of help from mental distress.

Asking for it is the difficult part. If you are feeling suicidal then you need to go to your GP and sit down and simply say those words. It's a very difficult thing to do for most people but you need to be honest for people to be able to help.

If you don't feel able to do that then there are many helplines available in most countries. For instance in the UK there is Childline for children, The Samaritans and all other kinds of charitable organisations dealing with mental health issues of all different kinds that have helplines where you can speak to someone anonymously.

Even ask people on here, either mods or people you feel safe asking. Just make sure you are careful who you share information with.
 
Hey guys, i dont mean to hijack the thread or anything. You just need somebody to talk to sometimes, and i hate talking to people that i know. About this shit, i actually dont like talking to anybody about anything anymore.

Ive been to countless therapists and im only 16. I cut, punch holes, drink excessively, smoke too many cigarettes, fiend for opiates. Just anything to escape what im feeling right now. I was physically and mentally abused by my mother for 13 years. And i hate what im becoming. She has borderline personality disorder, manic depression/ anxiety, PTSD, and bipolar. And she passed it all on to me, she was a heroin addict and now she takes excessive amounts of xanax, klonopin, roxies, whatever. And im slowly becoming her.

I never got that love that a kid needs growing up. To make things even worse i found a girl that i truly and deeply cared for. Ive never cared for anybody but myself but i felt something with her. We were together for almost a year and went through the same experiences with the mental and physical scars to prove eachother. We just.. understood. Then out of nowhere she breaks up with me and says she just wants to fool around with guys and not let emotions get too serious, when she said she loved me first.

What makes it worse is we both have the same friends, so i see her almost everyday. It kilIs me even more to know that she doesnt care. I finally thought i had someone to rely on, care for, someone to just give a shit about me. And i was wrong, i always get my hopes up because ive just always been hoping something good will come out of this. And the moment something good happens i get fucked over.

Im just done with it, my dad doesnt respect me and tells me to get over it. My mom is a crazy drug addict. And unfortunately i am too. I got arrested and had to take court ordered drug classes, and im a fucking addict at 16. Everyone tells me my opinion doesnt matter because i havnt experienced life yet. Even though ive experienced enough to want to end it. Its like how the fuck do you know how i feel, or think.

Sorry for the book im just hurting. Ive held the shotgun in my mouth more times than i care to remember. I dont know what stops me everytime. I just want to be a good soul and treat everyone with love, because i know what its like to feel unloved, unaccepted, uncared for. Have a great day guys, happy 420 btw :)
 
Cut the slag out of your life completely, you'll be surprised by how much your outlook on life improves despite all the other shit you have been through.
 
Its hard man i loved her, i see her everyday. And whats funny is her last name is owens and owen is in your name. I just cant seem to get away from her. And my parents are divorced so i am court ordered to see my crazy mom for 2 more years. I try to be positive but man its fucking hard sometimes.
 
I can't fucking cope anymore. And not only am I affecting me I'm affecting a really great person. Just smashed the shit out of my wall (trying not to cut)

I just want to go to sleep and never wake up, the hallucinations are affecting me really badly right now. Can't stop crying
 
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