The Big & Dandy Methoxetamine Thread: 9th dose - Tolerance Schmolerance

[transitioneer]

I've developed a pretty serious psychological addiction to this stuff. The past 3 weeks, I've gone through I think about 5 grams to myself. After making a fool of myself last week, I decided I need to take a break. I used up the rest of my supply, and now is day 2 without taking any. Though I made a stupid mistake. I ordered 2 more grams, and they'll be arriving tomorrow. My birthday is also on Sunday, so I know I'm going to be tempted to use.

I'm only posting this cause I have a few questions. Ever since I began using, I've noticed no negative physical symptoms. The occasional light bladder pain, nothing to worry about. However, going through 5 grams in 2 to 3 weeks has left me feeling...very drained. I was doing it every single day, very large amounts too, upwards of 200mg at once, nasally. I stopped all together yesterday, and felt extremely tired all day. I worked out for a good 20 minutes, and simply collapsed on my floor and fell asleep for a good 3 hours. Woke up, and slept another 9 hours. Also, I feel a difference in my blood pressure levels. I feel slightly light headed when I walk around, and have noticed that I don't really feel like eating much, though I do simply to feed my body to help it recover.

Has any of this happened to any of our heavier users? I mean, I feel okay...I just feel drained, like I don't want to do anything but nap all day. I'm sure this is just a normal reaction to being on a heavy binge the past 2 weeks, but...I don't know, just looking to hear some other stories similar to mine.

I actually just went through a binge like you, where I did around 6 grams in 3 weeks. I took like one day a week off but I was IVing 200+mg (not at once. 40-60mg at a time and I would redose at least once, and up to 5 times) a day almost every day since I received the mxe. I knew I was addicted even before I ordered it, but I was kinda testing myself to see how I would use if I had a stash. Clearly pretty disappointing, especially considering the immense lifestyle change I've been going through, but I was still going to work and fulfilling my responsibilities. I'd like to not order anymore til I'm able to move out of my mom's house again, but I have been thinking about it, and I just ran out 2 days ago... lol.

I don't feel any symptoms of withdrawal but I don't feel too much happier either, which I'd like to think is the point of me using psychedelics/dissociatives.

I'd say if you're feeling that off, then just don't binge as hard when you use. It's okay to use, I think, even if you know you're addicted, as long as you can be rational... though I'm not really one to speak, I definitely plan on excercizing some more moderation if I do order again. I also plan on getting a gram or two, also, as this will definitely help any thoughts of "Oh, I have a bunch, so I can dose without real thought" and then getting sucked into a cycle, as I find it fairly hard to not redose.

I have been taking omega-3s and vitamin b6 daily, and eating fairly healthy (lots of fruits), so maybe this is why I don't feel any negative symptoms, but then again I really didn't feel much after I ended up in jail for 10 days in the midst of a much longer binge then the one I just went on. Smoking weed also helps, but I'm a daily smoker, so ymmv. I would also recommend taking piracetam and/or aniracetam to help restore your NMDA receptors. (http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/10338103)

 

[J.Wallace]

transitioneer,

I think ordering a gram or two at a time is a good idea. Like you said, it makes you think twice about constantly redosing. When I went through those 5 grams, I had recently ordered 6 grams. The entire 6 grams came in a single vial, as oppose to the tiny 1gram vials I'm use to receiving. Having it all in one place definitely gave off the impression of using less than I actually was.

 

[transitioneer]

I also feel that having a large amount reduces the psychological impact of the drug, as I found if I have a decent amount on hand I'm just getting dissociated because I can. When I have a limited amount it makes me not take it for granted as much and therefore I end up taking more away from my experiences rather than just getting dissociated to the point where I'm not able to remember any of it.

If I do order again it will definitely be <2g just to make sure I don't start abusing it again.
Who knows how exactly I'll feel then, but right now I feel like if I was out of my mom's house again and I could (ab)use without any of the guilt that I feel when I use here that I certainly would, especially if I had a large amount. Not to say constant dissociation is healthy, but tending my responsibilities sober and then having fun is fine. The afterglow also feels very therapeutic regardless of any guilt from using.

 

[IamMe90]

Reading through these kind of posts is just cringeworthy. You are not "rational" you are hopelessly addicted to a drug that very possibly might promote negative long term physical side effects and are justifying your habits with inane reasoning like "well if I just order smaller amounts at a time I'll binge less." How can you not understand that you should not be taking methoxetamine, at all? Ordering 6 1g vials of MXE rather than ordering 1 6g vial is not a "great idea," it just makes you appear desperate.

 

[J.Wallace]

Reading through these kind of posts is just cringeworthy. You are not "rational" you are hopelessly addicted to a drug that very possibly might promote negative long term physical side effects and are justifying your habits with inane reasoning like "well if I just order smaller amounts at a time I'll binge less." How can you not understand that you should not be taking methoxetamine, at all? Ordering 6 1g vials of MXE rather than ordering 1 6g vial is not a "great idea," it just makes you appear desperate.

Never said it was a "Great Idea", we're just being honest with ourselves. We already know we are going to use this substance, might as do what ever helps us reduce our overall usage.

 

[transitioneer]

Yes, exactly. I know I'm addicted, and that the cravings would exist even if I knew that there wasn't any way I could get it.
I understand being addicted isn't healthy, but I don't think using mxe has impacted me negatively, I just would like to use it less but it's hard when I consider that fact.

 

[limonov]

Addiction is not some perjoritive term that is thrown around to insult people- addiction is a self-destructive and ultimately purposeless psychological condition where you over-value obtaining drugs/taking drugs/the effects of drugs to the extent that you stop prioritising other things in your life.

The real danger of methoxetamine addiction is not so much destroying your bladder or your brain (though I get the feeling that arylcyclohexylamines are fairly destructive in general), it's about destroying relationships with people who you care about and who care about you, it's about losing a firm enough grip on reality to be able to concieve of meaningful goals (concrete achievements, not hyper-abstract 'dissociative achievements' that generally amount to nothing in the real world), it's about spending hours trying to think up the 'perfect formula' for drug abuse- that simultanously allows for a normal life as well as chronic dissociative abuse.

I don't mean to be preachy, but these threads have gotten progressively scarier and scarier as time as passed- I agree with IAmMe90. I'm speaking from experience- when I used methoxetamine heavily, even though I held down a good job and continued to socialise and whatnot I was drifting further and further away from reality and the dissociatives were slowly sending me insane. I was narscissistic, manic, delusional, aggressive...all without knowing it at the time. I was driving a huge wedge between myself and my friends because of my increasingly insane behaviour, I was losing my partner because I wasn't actually living in the same dimension as her- all without having a fucking clue.

Dissociatives are a lot like cannabis- not in the least bit addictive, but habituating. Powerfully habituating. And chronic dosing of methoxetamine (and like 80% of the doses listed on this thread I would consider 'high/chronic dosing') over any period of time seems to cause the build up of long-acting metabolites, so you're high all the time. My lips were numb, not vascular constriction numb, but rather 'I just smoked just the right amount of PCP' numb for about 4 weeks after I stopped my methoxetamine/ketamine binge.

I crave heroin, but I don't give into that yearning because I want to be clean and I don't want to fuck up my poppy tea taper. I'm so close to being free of my fucking opiate addiction. And once I'm clean I'm gonna crave opiates, I'm gonna crave them long after the PAWS has gone away and everything. But I don't want to give into these cravings and there is nothing making you act on your cravings. YOu can't do anything about your cravings, but you have absolute control over how you respond to your cravings. Denying that is using the same arguements paedophiles use to justify their crimes- 'it's not my fault I'm only attracted to kids, I have cravings!'. It isn't an excuse for that and it isn't an excuse for this.

The drugs aren't the problem- what the drugs are almost undoubtably doing to your life and your interpersonal relationships is either a problem or is going to become a problem. Balance is important. Being able to enjoy being sober is important. Being able to resist cravings is important. Self mastery is a virtue, being enslaved to your desires is a vice.

 

[IamMe90]

Addiction is not some perjoritive term that is thrown around to insult people- addiction is a self-destructive and ultimately purposeless psychological condition where you over-value obtaining drugs/taking drugs/the effects of drugs to the extent that you stop prioritising other things in your life.

The real danger of methoxetamine addiction is not so much destroying your bladder or your brain (though I get the feeling that arylcyclohexylamines are fairly destructive in general), it's about destroying relationships with people who you care about and who care about you, it's about losing a firm enough grip on reality to be able to concieve of meaningful goals (concrete achievements, not hyper-abstract 'dissociative achievements' that generally amount to nothing in the real world), it's about spending hours trying to think up the 'perfect formula' for drug abuse- that simultanously allows for a normal life as well as chronic dissociative abuse.

I don't mean to be preachy, but these threads have gotten progressively scarier and scarier as time as passed- I agree with IAmMe90. I'm speaking from experience- when I used methoxetamine heavily, even though I held down a good job and continued to socialise and whatnot I was drifting further and further away from reality and the dissociatives were slowly sending me insane. I was narscissistic, manic, delusional, aggressive...all without knowing it at the time. I was driving a huge wedge between myself and my friends because of my increasingly insane behaviour, I was losing my partner because I wasn't actually living in the same dimension as her- all without having a fucking clue.

Dissociatives are a lot like cannabis- not in the least bit addictive, but habituating. Powerfully habituating. And chronic dosing of methoxetamine (and like 80% of the doses listed on this thread I would consider 'high/chronic dosing') over any period of time seems to cause the build up of long-acting metabolites, so you're high all the time. My lips were numb, not vascular constriction numb, but rather 'I just smoked just the right amount of PCP' numb for about 4 weeks after I stopped my methoxetamine/ketamine binge.

I crave heroin, but I don't give into that yearning because I want to be clean and I don't want to fuck up my poppy tea taper. I'm so close to being free of my fucking opiate addiction. And once I'm clean I'm gonna crave opiates, I'm gonna crave them long after the PAWS has gone away and everything. But I don't want to give into these cravings and there is nothing making you act on your cravings. YOu can't do anything about your cravings, but you have absolute control over how you respond to your cravings. Denying that is using the same arguements paedophiles use to justify their crimes- 'it's not my fault I'm only attracted to kids, I have cravings!'. It isn't an excuse for that and it isn't an excuse for this.

The drugs aren't the problem- what the drugs are almost undoubtably doing to your life and your interpersonal relationships is either a problem or is going to become a problem. Balance is important. Being able to enjoy being sober is important. Being able to resist cravings is important. Self mastery is a virtue, being enslaved to your desires is a vice.

This is a beautiful fucking post, and I hope everyone in this thread reads it and takes something away from it.

 

[IamMe90]

Never said it was a "Great Idea", we're just being honest with ourselves. We already know we are going to use this substance, might as do what ever helps us reduce our overall usage.

Have you ever heard of the idea that if you don't try, you'll never succeed? Often times I find that people who say that they are "just being honest with themselves" about compulsive drug use are not really being honest with themselves, but instead creating a justification for not attempting to take on one of the hardest endeavors there is - abstaining from said drug. I will not deny that it may be TRUE that you cannot abstain from MXE, but you really DON'T know this with any kind of certainty - "being honest with yourself," telling yourself that you CAN'T abstain from MXE before even putting a serious effort into it, is not being honest, it's being lazy and it's an addictive act. There is far more you can do to help yourself elude these addictive tendencies than simply thinking "I won't dose today." Of those options involve professional help, familial and friend support, and other avenues. I would be surprised if you have attempted any of these - and in which case, you aren't being honest with yourself.

 

[Mugz]

I had a rreally reffreshing bicycle ride on a moderate amount off mxe last night, i seemed to have a lo more energy on the ride and i was appreciating the post rain damp and warm fresh air during the ride, my motor skills were working well enough forr me toa ride the bike without any problems.

I have been on 4fa and 3fmc after the ride whilst still sliglty mexxed and they didn't quite work out exactly as i was banking on but not all bad, I did get pretty mashed on the 4fa but over the course of the evening and this morning i was worried that iwas going to be stuck in a situation with overslimulation, uncomfortable enough to make the laast few hours unpleasant.

Things seemto half calmed down now and i dont feel as broken after dabbing some etiz powder (had been over 48 hours since my last benzo use before today, i'm startingg to feel normal again now and not in a hyper edgy state of physical stimulation that i was scared would no dissipate.

As others have said i wouldn't recommend taking large doses of serotonogeric and dopaminergic stims so soon after mxe has had such significant effects, on the comedown it seems to be a different story and i would recomment small doses on the tail end to assist in getting through the comedown with less edginess, a touch of etizolam or other benzos are alsoa good idea when the tremors and overstimulation are becomming unbearable to the point of fear of a seizure or worse.

I've learned a lesson about the mxe/4fa cominations today and wont make the mistake again in the future. ive stil had a great time though apart from that last stint a while back now, my brain doesn't feel broken now.

I'll post more about my experiences getting through large amounts and slipping into daily mxe use shortly, got other things to do rit now

 

[Sweetshare]

The value of MXE as a psychedelic is questionable in my eyes. But it really is a fantastic drug.

 

[pharmakos]

The value of MXE as a psychedelic is questionable in my eyes. But it really is a fantastic drug.

you know, i agree here

great drug, but in my experience even DXM is more psychedelic

 

[Issac Sinclair]

The value of MXE as a psychedelic is questionable in my eyes. But it really is a fantastic drug.

I disagree. I think its a great psychedelic drug. But I do have one issue with it. The constant want to redose makes it addictive. I think I reset something by combining it with 4-aco-dmt. Or a large dose. I took like 200mg over the course of a night, maybe 100mg at first, then took another 100mg with with the 4-aco. Now I don't have a need to do it. It might have been the 4-aco doing the non addictive nature of it, but I have about 60g just laying here and I don't really want to take it.

But wow!!!
It doesn't mess with your dick when you take it, it feels warm and seductive, it makes your pain go away, its trippy, it makes you think really well. Idk I think its the perfect drug!!

 

[TheAppleCore]

It appears that, contrary to my initial fears, I am fairly unlikely to develop any serious psychological addiction to this material. After a love affair with MXE that lasted maybe three or four months, during which I used the drug at least weekly, my obsession with the material is definitely cooling off. At the moment, I'm just feeling a bit tired of the effects, and I haven't properly M-holed in weeks. I'm sure after a longer break, my interest will rekindle, but it's nice to know that MXE isn't a continuously snowballing addiction for me.

It doesn't mess with your dick when you take it ... it makes you think really well

I disagree with these two statements.

 

[transitioneer]

While I understand the connotation that "being addicted to methoxetamine" gives off, I really think some people are blowing it out of proportion...

I'm currently taking a break from dissociatives, so who knows how often I'll want to dose mxe when this break ends... that is if I even decide to order some again.

Regardless, as I said, I think those who feel the need to come off as superior just possibly aren't understanding that "addiction" isn't a general term and the extent to which it effects a person's life greatly varies. Due to recent circumstances, I don't have as prominent of a social life as I once did, and as a result mostly all of my efforts are focused on saving my money and getting things in order so that I can go away to school to work on getting my Ph.D. This is not to say I'm a recluse, but I don't even have a cell phone lol so being social with my friends is quite hard outside of occasional AIM conversations.

This is why I found it extremely easy to abuse, as it help me to be content and prevented me from sinking into a withdrawn depression.
Having lots of free time also doesn't help with cravings, as I'll get home from work and then have nothing really to do, so it's not hard to get back to the train of thought: "Oh I wish I had some mxe so I wouldn't be so bored and shitty feeling."

The fact that other people are noting negative effects, but I have yet to encounter any may also have something to do with this, as I don't think it'd be too difficult for me to recognize that "oh shit this isn't having the positive effects I use it for, better stop"


Just because I was careless with my use once doesn't mean I'm a dumb "hopeless" addict. lol

 

[the toad]

Mxe comes in vials? 8)

Ive only seen ket in vials

Idk about you guys but ima stick to buying mxe and coke and ket in eighths and not buying any more zips

 

[transitioneer]

I assume he means the vendor just puts the chemical in a dram vial, not a sterile vial where the mxe is a solution... Although that would be fucking AWESOME if mxe did come as a solution in vials. Cooking up shots gets to be a pain sometimes.

Also, whatabouttheforests, I have combined mxe with 4-AcO-DMT before. It was the first day of a 3-day festival last summer, and my friends and I woke up at like 4am to make the 5hour drive up to the fest and get a good campsite. I had taken 1mg of XR alprozolam at like 1am before I went to get a bit of sleep and I think this greatly reduced my inhibitions, as pretty much as soon as I woke up, I was SL dosing mxe (estimated 20-35mg bumps) like every 45 minutes til probably 7pm. I took 20mg of 4-AcO around 4pm and smoked plenty of weed after... The mxe greatly reduced any tension I would feel otherwise while coming up on 4-AcO, granted I was on a LOT of mxe and couldn't walk straight at times.

It wasn't particularly intense but it was very enjoyable, purely recreational experience. Around maybe 8pm I smoked DMT and didn't have a spiritual trip like I would have expected, being on 4-AcO, but the CEV were particularly vivid and immersive.

I definitely recommend the combo (especially with the smoked DMT :D) but if I were to do it again, I would turn down the dosage frequency of mxe and avoid taking any mxe til after I dosed the 4-AcO.

 

[the toad]

collect the whole set

 

[zirbeldude]

Addiction is not some perjoritive term that is thrown around to insult people- addiction is a self-destructive and ultimately purposeless psychological condition where you over-value obtaining drugs/taking drugs/the effects of drugs to the extent that you stop prioritising other things in your life.

The real danger of methoxetamine addiction is not so much destroying your bladder or your brain (though I get the feeling that arylcyclohexylamines are fairly destructive in general), it's about destroying relationships with people who you care about and who care about you, it's about losing a firm enough grip on reality to be able to concieve of meaningful goals (concrete achievements, not hyper-abstract 'dissociative achievements' that generally amount to nothing in the real world), it's about spending hours trying to think up the 'perfect formula' for drug abuse- that simultanously allows for a normal life as well as chronic dissociative abuse.

I don't mean to be preachy, but these threads have gotten progressively scarier and scarier as time as passed- I agree with IAmMe90. I'm speaking from experience- when I used methoxetamine heavily, even though I held down a good job and continued to socialise and whatnot I was drifting further and further away from reality and the dissociatives were slowly sending me insane. I was narscissistic, manic, delusional, aggressive...all without knowing it at the time. I was driving a huge wedge between myself and my friends because of my increasingly insane behaviour, I was losing my partner because I wasn't actually living in the same dimension as her- all without having a fucking clue.

Dissociatives are a lot like cannabis- not in the least bit addictive, but habituating. Powerfully habituating. And chronic dosing of methoxetamine (and like 80% of the doses listed on this thread I would consider 'high/chronic dosing') over any period of time seems to cause the build up of long-acting metabolites, so you're high all the time. My lips were numb, not vascular constriction numb, but rather 'I just smoked just the right amount of PCP' numb for about 4 weeks after I stopped my methoxetamine/ketamine binge.

I crave heroin, but I don't give into that yearning because I want to be clean and I don't want to fuck up my poppy tea taper. I'm so close to being free of my fucking opiate addiction. And once I'm clean I'm gonna crave opiates, I'm gonna crave them long after the PAWS has gone away and everything. But I don't want to give into these cravings and there is nothing making you act on your cravings. YOu can't do anything about your cravings, but you have absolute control over how you respond to your cravings. Denying that is using the same arguements paedophiles use to justify their crimes- 'it's not my fault I'm only attracted to kids, I have cravings!'. It isn't an excuse for that and it isn't an excuse for this.

The drugs aren't the problem- what the drugs are almost undoubtably doing to your life and your interpersonal relationships is either a problem or is going to become a problem. Balance is important. Being able to enjoy being sober is important. Being able to resist cravings is important. Self mastery is a virtue, being enslaved to your desires is a vice.

awesome post!
it´s not that i don´t know these things, but it´s good to read it.

at the moment i have an addiction to opioids....since 2010 actually.
i´m glad that it´s no physical addiction. i get a prescription every month and run through the pills in a week, or give them to another person and take them every few days.

but i have to do something about it. i know i would be able to get off of it.
i have gone through several full blown benzo withdrawals.
in comparison to physical benzo addiction this is a joke,
it´s just that i enjoy it so much and crave for it if it´s not around.
and yeah...the pain i got it prescribed for got better...but i do have pain, everyday.
sometimes i have the feeling that my body generates the pain only to get the pills.

and mxe...my experience is that when i have it around it´s very hard for me to not take it.
and everytime i ran out it was okay. i decided to place an order and actually forgot about it.
sometimes it took weeks to a month to place a new order and then i did it 1-3 times a week,
sometimes more.
i would only do it in my flat and i´m not everyday there. and when i´m not there i don´t crave for it.
but this could be because i switch all the time between mxe and my pain medication.

the last two months i managed to do it only 1 time a week sometimes every two weeks.
and my last trip is about 3 weeks ago.

edit: i have days inbetween where i take nothing at all. and these are sometimes hard and sometimes i enjoy sobriety.


i save your post to my desktop. thanks!

 

[pharmakos]

my last MXE trip left my muscles feeling scarily weak and sore. pretty sure i was going through Rhabdomyolysis like another poster somewhere suspected MXE can cause. smoking synthetic cannabinoids seemed to make it worse. i had dosed 5 out of the last 7 days though, and also had been drinking alcohol a few nights.... either way, left me shaken up enough that i'm putting MXE off for a minute. gonna get my body back in shape.... 'bout to head out for a walk. take it easy guys.