Find yourself a credible mindfulness meditation program. Look up the true practitioners and communicators work like Jon Kabat-Zinn. Practice the 8-week program properly. It's not a massive commitment either, your daily commitment will range from 20 minutes to 40 minutes (excluding reading the book). Then tell me it doesn't help massively (you won't!)
You know what's funny? My dealer of all people actually recommended meditation instead of medication. I'll give it a try when I'm done exhausting all my other options.
If you haven't tried kava kava yet, then I wouldn't write it off. The excellent safety and tolerance profile recommends it.
The NRI activity is very real, but differs dramatically between strains. Heady kavas are bad for it, but tudeis aren't typically. I'm unusually susceptible to the stimulation from kavain, but most people aren't bothered by it.
What I never understood is why anyone suffering from anxiety needs more adrenaline in their system in the first place. I know many benefit from it apparently and aren't bothered by it. But I sure the fuck am. I need less, not more adrenaline.
Did you try Kratom? The ones I mentioned are on the sedative/ painkilling side of the spectrum. There are more stimulating strains.
I haven't, no. I tried researching it a while back but couldn't really find any info besides anecdotal reports (one of which reported significant withdrawal effects) so I'm highly skeptical. I'll add it to the list I guess. I haven't had a chance to try the other Russian meds (besides Phenibut and Fluorophenibut), customs intercepted every one I tried to order. They let Selank thru, likely because the drug died by the time it reached them. I'll need to find ways around this.
I personally find clonazepam to be an excellent functional anxiolytic. You said it only took the edge off for you but what dose did you try? It's also not a drug you really "feel" so much, but it should kill off anxiety without smashing you in the face like alprazolam for example would. Bromazepam is also a very good one for both recreation and anxiety, same goes for etizolam.
Klono certainly worked out the best so far. I took 1.5mg every 2 days. Anything less was ineffectual and anything more was hypnotic. I drive power equipment for a living and it didn't interfere with it at all (unlike Buspar).
Etizolam has similar half-life of Xanax so I expect the same retard-inducing effects.
The right strain of weed can also act as an excellent anxiolytic.
While weed would reduce my general anxiety, it would probably increase my paranoia.
But if you want a more long-term solution since it sounds like you got some serious childhood issues etc, may I recommend an acid trip in a calm controlled environment? It's like a therapy session inside your own head and trust me psychedelics have actually helped me work through a lot of my own problems including family shit, traumatic shit, etc.
Hallucinogens are a huge no-no. The first and last time I've done acid was the worst, most traumatic mindfuck I've ever had, a nightmare I couldn't wake up from. 'Nuff said. And this was back in my confident teen days, I can't imagine doing shit like that right now as a nervous, apprehensive cripple.
MDMA can also help PTSD in the right controlled environment, MAPS are running clinical trials to get it FDA approved for PTSD treatment as we speak.
That's just a fad that will end up something way different than the ignorant pushers of these fads expect it to be. I've done molly. The first time became a bad trip where all my paranoia got amplified to the max (I OD'd). The second time (responsible dose) was quite beautiful and among the happiest days of my life. The third time (same dose as the second) resulted in a panic attack where I experienced chest pain, violent mood swings and shortness of breath for hours.
As much as I want to repeat that good trip I had, which had lasting positive effects, I can't take that roller coaster bullshit during the comeup. This is why I hate stimulants in general and have no idea why so many of them are marketed to help anxiety, even having "anxiety" on its list of side effects right on the bottle. It's confusing as hell.
Regarding the Russian anti-anxiety med's. The ones that seem available like Etifoxine and Afabazole make me very curious.
I wrote both of those off, the side effects are not worth it. I'll add Opipramol to the list, it does sound interesting.