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MDMA Recovery (Stories & Support - 3)

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I tried Piracetam yesterday 1200g, and today i took 3200g morning and 4800g in the afternoon which is considered by many an attack dose, an guess what? Nothing happened. Fuck
 
Budal202 said:
I'm starting to develop a theory (though it is complicated because of the difficulty of concentration and attention that makes me constantly lose the train of thought) that many of the LTC’s symptoms reported here by myself and others MDMA abusers, especially those that are considered anxiety symptoms, may be related to sexual dysfunction, as many professional psychologists believe that the root of psychological problems is sexual.
...
But the biggest problem is sexual dysfunction.
...
For those who managed to improve or cure sexual dysfunction after a LTC, what did you do? What medications or supplements did you take? What tests did you do?
Click to expand...

What I am about to say is not something which I'm proud of (on the contrary, I would do just about anything to have another chance to right my wrongs), and I almost even feel guilty talking about it: Over the course of around 5 years, I managed to ingest over 1,000 'ecstasy' pills, 'molly' capsules, and straight up crystals/powder at times before I finally got really sick. The part which somewhat provokes a feeling of guilt (because I really don't wish to potentially undermine your theory) is the fact that, um, sexually speaking, I'm 99% certain that I'm okay. In other words, I've had no noticeable and/or noteworthy permanent changes or alterations to the general functionality of my reproductive organs which could be defined as sexual dysfunction. But hey, everyone's wired differently, so I'd hope that my observations of my libido arguably shouldn't be surprising.

My theory regarding 'LTC Symptoms' based on my own unfortunate first-hand experience is that, by choosing to repeatedly and frequently consume two potent mind altering substances together in the form of MDMA (usually as 'ecstasy' pills and/or as 'molly' capsules) + Ethyl Alcohol (Alcoholic Beverages), I basically fucked myself by way of inducing a synergistic neurotoxic effect (potentially resulting in lesions due to the exponentially amplified toxicity) which ultimately led to far more total damage than any and all regions of my brain could handle by way of so called 'Neuroplasticity' in order to compensate.

One analogy could be that of Ionizing Radiation: The risk of falling ill due to Acute Radiation Syndrome is known to increase if the absorbed dose of a dangerously high amount is absorbed all at once rather than over a protracted period of time. And with respect to my brain and the amount of damage that was possibly done, the "dose" of neurotoxicity (so to speak) was dangerously high, and it was "absorbed" too quick for my brain and rest of body to be able to properly compensate, thus, resulting in 'LTC Symptoms.' This is all purely theoretical (I have no objective medical evidence to back it up whatsoever, so please don't freak out, as it's possible that I'm WAY off).
 
@ro4eva Whoah! A thousand pills and no sexual problems? Not even a small decrease of libido?

Then it could all be psychological, or just another snowball sympthom from insomnia for exemple. That gives me hope.

That's a interesting point. I myself have abused this two substances. This whole thing started after a night pf heavy drinking and my record of mdma (6 pills).

I was able to have an erection today. It was almost 100% but i always have to stimulate the penis touching it. So it could be a testosterone problem caused by my high levels of cortisol due to extreme ansiety and stress.

I'm focused on brain damage recovery and neurogenesis now, did a lot of searchs. Good things are coming from all of this. I'm learning more and more english, and about how our brain and body works everyday.

Here's what i'm eating and taking daily:

Ground beef and eggs (protein, choline and l-cartinine) i'm going to buy pure choline. Tune with natural fish oil. And a lot of healthy food that i dont know how is called in english.

Omega 3 + vitamin E 4 times/day

0.5mg xanax + 3mg Melatonin 1 hour before sleep (its helping so much, melatonin gives me a lot of vivid dreams tho, but when i have a positive day its only good dreams and its a nice experience)

I was taking glutamine but i read that it converts into glutamate which is not something you want high levels levels on your brain durying a recover from LTC, so no more glutamine.

I ordered MACA 500mg to help with libido

Also ASHWAGANDHA to axons recovery and control ansiety.

GINKGO BILOBA 60mg
RHODIOLA 300mg
PREGNENOLONE 50mg
And GABA PLUS

I intend to take all of this soon as possible and will share experiences. Still facing:

Insomnia, head pulsation, palpitations, brain fog, weird vision, flowters, low líbido, lack of concentration and memory, ansiety and a little of paranoia.

But i finally have an objective in life.

Thanks ro4eva, my friend, you've been a great guide for me.

Wish you all peace.
 
Guys not cure but To relieve the symptoms get a cervical pillow and support for you r spine while in bed eat foods reach on magnesium potassium and sodium I did not buy supplements I don't suggest either . vitamin b12 for the nerves but to be sure everything is ok get an mri on the neck or spine ok . Jesús the lord bring a lot happiness and good wishes to your family happy Christmas guys take care.
 
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Hi everyone,

I just wanted to let you know that I decided to start taking an SSRI (Escalitopram) to be exact. I have been in an LTC from 08-14 till about 09-15. I still have some minor issues that don't seem to go away completely so that's why I decided this.

I started with:
Severe depression (I felt like 3 out of 10 whole day, so pretty shit)
Severe anxiety (Thinking i screwed my life etc)
Sleeping & Libido problems

I have now left
Little depression (Mostly I feel between a 5,5 and a 7,5)
Severe social anxiety (I had this in my youth as well but way less extreme)

So I started today with SSRI and I will let you know if it helps me to overcome the last 2 things I have left
 
Good luck brahh! For one year allready some good process. Im curious on how the ssri will hook o
 
Hey guys,

Here's a recovery story and a few questions..

I've had an LTC since May last year where managed to over-dose MDMA significantly (as a first-timer) and combined with alcohol, cocaine etc. (yes very stupid)..

I've been following the recommendations in the forums in terms of: strict diet, exercise as much as possible, no drugs/alcohol, no caffeine, being active/out in sunshine, Omega3s. (I tried 5-HTP but got heartburn from it so had to stop after only 4 days.)

I've also seen a neurologist, which similar to your experiences really can't help in this type of situations even if I shared the full story of what had happened. The doctor concluded that all nerves, reflexes and other were 100% healthy.

Summarized timeline:

May-June - Brain Zaps, could not work at all, headaches. Tried alcohol on one occasion in which made things worse
July-Aug - No zaps but serious concentration issues could not watch TV or read at all, headaches, could not work
Sept-Oct - Back to work but difficulties attending longer meetings/focus, being able to exercise to some extent
Nov-Dec - Improving, being able to work in normal fashion 40-60h/week, back to full work-out (4-5 times a week), started with Caffeine again mid Nov without any perceived issues. On the other hand caffeine felt as it made me improve at this stage (while when I tried it back in July it made me worse)

Besides for the first week after the incident (which was the worst in my life) not any problems with anxiety, panic or de-personalisation.

My remaining issue now is a headache in the lower back part of the brain, in the brain stem. The part where it previously felt like the Brain Zaps originated. The pain is vague and most apparent when I close my eyes. It slowly moves/shifts from the brainstem all the way forward above the palate, it's quite difficult to explain, it would be interesting to learn if any of you other have experienced a similar headache. Despite this strange pain/headache I have no problem at all falling a sleep and sleep perfectly normal, thus obviously it is not a very serious type of pain. However the pain/feeling is constant, annoying and always there everyday, does not vary much in intensity from day-to-day or time of day. It feels as if it gets more intense when stressing the brain by e.g. looking at a big computer screen with lot’s of numbers.



All-in-all I have recovered quite nicely for which I'm extremely grateful, having read many of the tips for how to recover on this forum: THANKS.

I have two more questions where I haven't been able to find the answer in the existing posts:

1. I could live the rest of my life without drugs (as I was not a regular user before this incident either), however I miss alcohol greatly in terms of wine and beer. Any recommendation when you think it would be time to try it again? One side of me is saying I should wait till the headache is completely gone, another side of me is saying a little careful consumption of alcohol would make me feel 100% normal and again and perhaps that would help in recovery of the headache, given it's perhaps more of a psychological issue that remains from the aforementioned trauma

2. Perhaps I should try 5-HTP again but in smaller dosage to fully recover? When I tried I did one capsule per day which I believe was 200mg. Or perhaps I should go for l-tryptophan instead?

Thanks in advance for any advice, and if could be of any help for anyone please me know.
 
@Halfdome Hey dude! Well this is one of the things i miss most too. Problem is that after my LTC alcohol and marijuana effects were never the same. I'm treating insomnia and ansiety with xanax and melatonin, so when o drink i cant take those and eventually have problems to sleep and ansiety. The day after is always very bad too.

BUUUUT, i've noticed that wine is more aceptable than beer or vodka, it's not so strong, and it actually helps with ansiety and insomnia and doesnt give me a hangover, if you wanna try to drink, try some wine.

I'm Happy to say that after 82 days without marijuana i smoked pot friday. At first i was scared but it was definitely OK, i was with 3 good friends. I dont intend to keep smoking but the fact that i can smoke again makes me happy.

If you wanna try drinking again, here are some things u need to have in mind:

Know that alcohool destroy your neurons
Don't do stupid things when drunk like use some drug.
Take it easy at first, your body is not used as the way it was
And dont do it frequentelly cuz its gonna fuck up with your recovery

Sorry for my bad english but this are some advises from my experience
 
Skeeto, I get pains in my left arms and chest rib area, like aching pains. I have to press down on it sometimes, this happens when I don't get adequate sleep (anyone out there relate ?) I also get majority of the floaters in my left eye. Apart from that I only have pains, floaters and I can feel my heart beat sometimes. React fine with alcohol, don't smoke weed.


It sucks but I'm living my life to the fullest. Still getting good grades at Uni and doing the shit I want to do. My worry is that when I get my motorbike my left arm gets sore and tired when on the steering wheel. This will probably effect my stamina on the bike but oh well. What can you do. I feel as if my circumstance is different to everyone on this threads, and it will be with me till I hit the grave. I've accepted this and work around it as much as I can. Sometimes it gets me down. But I could have been drawn a worse card. Thanks everyone peace xx 12 months and still confident.
 
Guys, look at this:

"Psilocybin has recently been found to increase hippocampal neurogenesis in mice, and increased the speed of their ‘unlearning’ of negative fear behaviour responses when compared to drug free controls. This could mean psilocybin may have applications for treating PTSD in humans, a syndrome characterised by highly abnormal brain function, including impaired hippocampal function.

Studies with high doses of psilocybin have found they can induce long term, positive changes in personality and feelings of life satisfaction and well being. Openness is one of the five measures of personality, and is significantly changed in the long term by psilocybin, especially if people have a mystical experience during a session."

We could actually treat LTC ansiety and depression disorders with shrooms and increase fucking neurogenesis.

I'm so willing to try this, I intend to prepare myself mentally for it, does anyone here ever tried it?. Guys, this makes perfect sense. In all my LSD trips I reached understandings of things in my life but never tried mushrooms.
 
Hello guys,4 months pass from my 50-60mg dose(no redose) with some alcohol like 3 cups whine

Never used drugs at past

I'm here with solved insomnia,depression,anxiety,panic attacks at public(yesterday I was in a party without problems)
I still don't drink alcohol not even a cup of whine

My last symptom is my hands.I still feel them 10% weak and I have some burning sensation at stomach random at day and I feel some times that I have fever
That symptoms appear and dissapear

Anyone else experience that?
 
Brahhhh said:
Hi everyone,

I just wanted to let you know that I decided to start taking an SSRI (Escalitopram) to be exact. I have been in an LTC from 08-14 till about 09-15. I still have some minor issues that don't seem to go away completely so that's why I decided this.

I started with:
Severe depression (I felt like 3 out of 10 whole day, so pretty shit)
Severe anxiety (Thinking i screwed my life etc)
Sleeping & Libido problems

I have now left
Little depression (Mostly I feel between a 5,5 and a 7,5)
Severe social anxiety (I had this in my youth as well but way less extreme)

So I started today with SSRI and I will let you know if it helps me to overcome the last 2 things I have left
Click to expand...

Hey Brahhhh,

I just want to extend my deepest sympathies and support to you.

More specifically, I just want to be sure you're aware that choosing to start an SSRI medication can be very difficult on its own, and extremely so when already suffering from LTC Symptoms.

And if you do happen to find yourself feeling even worse after starting the Escitalopram than you did before, please know that this is a very typical reaction to just about every SSRI medication.

But know also that, if you manage to stick with the regimen for the first 4 weeks, the side effects WILL begin to fade slowly but surely, and you'll have passed through the most difficult phase of the regimen BY FAR.

So hang in there buddy! Take time off of work/school if possible until the start of February, for this shall significantly reduce the burden of attempting to function while your body is becoming accustomed to having the drug in its system.

If it makes it any easier, think of this as your New Year's Resolution for 2016, and know that (for what it's worth) I'm really rootin' for ya! And I'm sure others here are as well.

"You can do eeeet!" - Rob Schneider

Okay I'll shut up now.
 
Thanos90 said:
Hello guys,4 months pass from my 50-60mg dose(no redose) with some alcohol like 3 cups whine

Never used drugs at past

I'm here with solved insomnia,depression,anxiety,panic attacks at public(yesterday I was in a party without problems)
I still don't drink alcohol not even a cup of whine

My last symptom is my hands.I still feel them 10% weak and I have some burning sensation at stomach random at day and I feel some times that I have fever
That symptoms appear and dissapear

Anyone else experience that?
Click to expand...

The odd burning stomach symptom began to affect me about a couple of weeks before I became sick with LTC Symptoms, but not after I recovered.

I suppose I just found it interesting that you mentioned it because, although I remember it very well, nobody else I've spoken to who is sadly dealing with LTC Symptoms has brought it up (or I've forgotten).

When it would bother me, I used Pepto Bismol to deal with it (which was extremely fast and effective but unfortunately not a cure so much as a band aid effect). But if it would somehow rear its ugly head again, I'd still use the pink stuff without a second thought (because everything else I tried didn't do shit).
 
Budal202 said:
Guys, look at this:

"Psilocybin has recently been found to increase hippocampal neurogenesis in mice, and increased the speed of their ‘unlearning’ of negative fear behaviour responses when compared to drug free controls. This could mean psilocybin may have applications for treating PTSD in humans, a syndrome characterised by highly abnormal brain function, including impaired hippocampal function.

Studies with high doses of psilocybin have found they can induce long term, positive changes in personality and feelings of life satisfaction and well being. Openness is one of the five measures of personality, and is significantly changed in the long term by psilocybin, especially if people have a mystical experience during a session."

We could actually treat LTC ansiety and depression disorders with shrooms and increase fucking neurogenesis.

I'm so willing to try this, I intend to prepare myself mentally for it, does anyone here ever tried it?. Guys, this makes perfect sense. In all my LSD trips I reached understandings of things in my life but never tried mushrooms.
Click to expand...

This is what really ticks me off about the fact that certain plants have been deemed to be of no use to medicine by the DEA. That would be because they are fucking clueless.

It would also be because any Schedule I substance is notoriously difficult to legally obtain and study. And as a consequence, our brightest minds who are working to further our ability to effectively treat documented diseases and disorders with novel, promising treatments derived from natural sources including Psilocybin Mushrooms have literally been crippled by needless bureaucratic red tape.

It pains me to think of how many patients could have benefited from such treatments, but instead witnessed a stagnation of new treatment options because of stupid, two-faced laws regarding certain mind altering substances.

Nixon's decision to create the DEA, and to have it deal with the medical issue of drug addiction and/or dependency was akin to having cab drivers tasked with flying commercial airplanes. And after 4+ decades of abusive + corrupt law enforcement, extremely biased propaganda, blatant double standards, and also absolutely zero tangible progress, it sure as hell shows just how stupid of an idea it truly was, but I digress.

Sorry about my rant, this is indeed exciting news, and I thank you for sharing it with us. Contributions such as these have helped many BLers immensely, so thank you very much, and please keep it up (if thou wishes it) =D

==========================

Edit - Oh, and to answer your question:

After recovering from LTC Symptoms in and around mid 2007, I did indeed go on to consume Shrooms on more than one occasion. And I've also used Ketamine and LSD (the first of which I have always found to be a fantastic anti-depressant and pain killer for some reason, and without the harsh crash which is associated with potent stimulants and psychedelic-stimulants).

And since I did consume Shrooms, I think it would be really cool if the untold amount of brain cells I likely fried after using such a recklessly massive amount of ecstasy pills + molly capsules + MDMA crystals has been offset by shroom induced neurogenesis). In fact, if this is actually true, then it would really make my day.
 
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Budal202 said:
Guys, look at this:

"Psilocybin has recently been found to increase hippocampal neurogenesis in mice, and increased the speed of their ‘unlearning’ of negative fear behaviour responses when compared to drug free controls. This could mean psilocybin may have applications for treating PTSD in humans, a syndrome characterised by highly abnormal brain function, including impaired hippocampal function.

Studies with high doses of psilocybin have found they can induce long term, positive changes in personality and feelings of life satisfaction and well being. Openness is one of the five measures of personality, and is significantly changed in the long term by psilocybin, especially if people have a mystical experience during a session."

We could actually treat LTC ansiety and depression disorders with shrooms and increase fucking neurogenesis.

I'm so willing to try this, I intend to prepare myself mentally for it, does anyone here ever tried it?. Guys, this makes perfect sense. In all my LSD trips I reached understandings of things in my life but never tried mushrooms.
Click to expand...

I have yet to try them again but I plan on doing it soon. Only thing holding be back is the fact that I had a bad acid trip and so am reluctant to engage with psychedelics.

Also I'll try to find the study but there was another suggesting DMT/Ayahuasca did the same thing, specifically that Ayahuasca increased Serotonin a lot and it became much more pronounced in one's blood. DMT and Psilocybin are quite similar.

If there is a drug answer to our issues I think it is within those substances. As soon as I do shrooms I'll post here, hoping that it can help me cure myself of all or most of these problems.
 
skeeto222 said:
I have yet to try them again but I plan on doing it soon. Only thing holding be back is the fact that I had a bad acid trip and so am reluctant to engage with psychedelics.

Also I'll try to find the study but there was another suggesting DMT/Ayahuasca did the same thing, specifically that Ayahuasca increased Serotonin a lot and it became much more pronounced in one's blood. DMT and Psilocybin are quite similar.

If there is a drug answer to our issues I think it is within those substances. As soon as I do shrooms I'll post here, hoping that it can help me cure myself of all or most of these problems.
Click to expand...

Almost 2 years in, I've considered this to be of potential help and starting preparing mentally alot for it, even tho 50% chance I won't have the balls to do it. I don't want to jump to miracle solutions quite yet tho
 
Neurogenesis is also possible with SSRI's:

"The most common form of antidepressants, serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), were believed to have their effect by boosting levels of serotonin in the brain. However, scientists have proven that SSRIs take about a month to improve mood in depressed patients. This delay in treatment suggests that another process, one influenced by serotonin, is involved. The neurogenesis theory of depression explains that the delay in mood improvement is a result of the minimal effect serotonin has on neurogenesis. Researchers have turned their focus to chemicals in the brain that promote neurogenesis and suggest that new treatments targeting said chemicals could be a more logical and effective treatment for depression. (1)The neurogenesis theory has been supported with animal studies. In one trial, researchers induced a depression-like condition in mice so they develop a depressive behavioral pattern. The mice were then given antidepressants and normal behavior returned. Then, when the mice were subjected to radiation treatment, a process known to terminate the formation of new nerve cells, the antidepressants stopped working and the mice returned to their depressed behaviors (1). Videbech cites this study as proof that antidepressants are only effective because of their influence on neurogenesis and when that influence is eliminated, antidepressants no longer improve depressive symptoms (2)."

I don't know if all these studies are real, but you know what? They gave me hope
 
It makes A LOT of sense.

If you stop to think about this stretch: "The most common form of antidepressants were believed to have their effect by boosting levels of serotonin in the brain".

Well we all here know something that indeed boost levels os Serotonin, right? Our old friend MDMA. The effect was immediate , we never had to wait a month for partying, right?

So why the SSRI's take so long to work? And why the early days are so bad?

Think about it guys. When I read Ro4eva posts, knowing that he took more than 1,000 pills, and is much better now, and knowing that he took mushrooms and SSRI after his LTC, I think we're getting to something promising.
 
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