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  • NSADD Moderators: deficiT | Jen

Heroin MA heroin V3 I'm wicked jammed kid

In franklin detox I got up to 40 but there were people on 55-60mg. Now that in at the clinic I'm up to 55mg and I've only been there for 6 days and I had a paperwork fuck up which cost me 2 days or I'd be at 60-65ng.
What are u using daily if u don't mind me asking bro? Were all tore up dope fiends and I ain't no barc type dude, I'm a ghetto kid born and raised and now I'm starting to feel so great I wanna pass this gift that someone passes to me along. Read my history and past posts, it's the evolution of a junkie lol
Providence is the worst bro. Next time u decide to get clean fuck with franklin recovery brother. Painless
 
Shit man hopefully getting my license in a few week if ur down I'll fly once I'm legit again
 
Hell yeah I would. I'm court ordered to do 3 a week. There's actually a couple NA meetings I like in Worcester.but more recently I've had to ask family members to drive me to meetings and the only close ones areAA. Idk some are ok but feels like a lot loom down on heroin addicts. I dont even know yet if I want to be clean I do outpatient groups 3x a week, meetings 3x a week,one on one counseling...and I tell them all I want to be clean but in all honesty, I've been trying to put a little cash away from my subs to get jammed and geeked as hell for like one weekend then stop for real. I get of probation in 5 months which is plenty of time to save up enough to get fucked up for one weekend. And I've done pretty well while on probation. I violated once but they cleared it. Does anyone know anything about early probation termination? Is that no longer an option if you have violated? This was the first time I ever got caught/arrested..so I don't know much about any of this....
 
Suboxombie said:
Hell yeah I would. I'm court ordered to do 3 a week. There's actually a couple NA meetings I like in Worcester.but more recently I've had to ask family members to drive me to meetings and the only close ones areAA. Idk some are ok but feels like a lot loom down on heroin addicts. I dont even know yet if I want to be clean I do outpatient groups 3x a week, meetings 3x a week,one on one counseling...and I tell them all I want to be clean but in all honesty, I've been trying to put a little cash away from my subs to get jammed and geeked as hell for like one weekend then stop for real. I get of probation in 5 months which is plenty of time to save up enough to get fucked up for one weekend. And I've done pretty well while on probation. I violated once but they cleared it. Does anyone know anything about early probation termination? Is that no longer an option if you have violated? This was the first time I ever got caught/arrested..so I don't know much about any of this....
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So I was gonna write a whole bunch of shit but I'm really too lazy so forgive me if this imperfect language doesn't flatter my ideas.

Sounds like you don't really want to quit if you still are planning the "one last" bender.

Since you can't have the good shit for 5 months, ween yourself off subs. Get really sober. Find out if its workin for you. Then you can think near the end of the 5 months if you want to do a bag or not. If you do, just buy 1 and you will still have a great high after that long sobriety. If you aren't ready to say goodbye to it for the rest of your life, don't set yourself up for failure by making that your goal.

I went to a 3x weekly outpatient group recently and I know I'm not ready to say goodbye to dope, so I made my goal to create healthy habits for myself. In my super scientific studies of me I've found that the answer to not doing heroin is to have things you want to do more than heroin. We all know the myriad reasons dope creates to keep us away from doing shit we like. Sorry can't catch that movie, gotta spend 10 extra mins in the bathroom and be late, nope can't go skiing today my guy was out last night and now I gotta wait around this morning or I'm gonna be skiing sick, etc 4eVeR

Personally I don't have physical addiction right now so I do a bag once or twice a month. Not ideal but if you truly aren't ready to let go its better than saying one last bender which it never is. The only last bender is the one that happened in the past. If your last bender has a future date I can pretty much guarantee it won't be your last.

I know that most junkstars dropping off a sub habit and having wd are on the express to dope habit station at least until they catch a transfer back to the same treatment centers.

**Somehow I still ended up writing a ton of shit :*( **
 
Cliffy78 said:
In franklin detox I got up to 40 but there were people on 55-60mg. Now that in at the clinic I'm up to 55mg and I've only been there for 6 days and I had a paperwork fuck up which cost me 2 days or I'd be at 60-65ng.
What are u using daily if u don't mind me asking bro? Were all tore up dope fiends and I ain't no barc type dude, I'm a ghetto kid born and raised and now I'm starting to feel so great I wanna pass this gift that someone passes to me along. Read my history and past posts, it's the evolution of a junkie lol
Providence is the worst bro. Next time u decide to get clean fuck with franklin recovery brother. Painless
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You know me Cliffy. Can't get into it in here, but we've met in person. I use at least hp a day of solid stuff.
 
No doubt brother, love the name lol. I found myself using about the same so I had to make the jump over to the 'done, so far so good. I love my dope and am in crazy pain after about 6 hrs after I dose from the pancreatitis but fuck it man there ain't shit I can do about it now. I wasn't shooting so the dope was barely helping too on top of costing me a pair of Jordan's a day so i just got fed up and said fuck it. Had 1 great connect get locked up and had some beef with another one so I was pretty fucked either way but the methadone I'd doing me better than the d with the right mixers and combos. I'm no fuckin angel a
I just couldn't keep up with the amt of dough I was gonna have to spend dealing with new dudes , if I could find them at all. I'm pretty introverted so I don't go out and meet people so all that pretty much ended my dope career. How's that case go bro?
 
generally I delete topics alluding to meet ups, but as this one seems genuinely motivated about abstinence and harm reduction I won't, but they're still against the rules or at best boderline; please take any further such talk to PM
 
SKL said:
generally I delete topics alluding to meet ups, but as this one seems genuinely motivated about abstinence and harm reduction I won't, but they're still against the rules or at best boderline; please take any further such talk to PM
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Hey SKL, is it within the rules to invite people to harm reduction events (I posted about a community naloxone training that we hosted a few weeks back). Technically, this is a "meet-up" but only in the sense that people could come to the same public space.

The program that I manage will be offering community based education events around substance use over the next year, and I'd like to continue offering these to BL members in this thread. Just don't want to break any rules.

Thanks
 
Cliffy78 said:
No doubt brother, love the name lol. I found myself using about the same so I had to make the jump over to the 'done, so far so good. I love my dope and am in crazy pain after about 6 hrs after I dose from the pancreatitis but fuck it man there ain't shit I can do about it now. I wasn't shooting so the dope was barely helping too on top of costing me a pair of Jordan's a day so i just got fed up and said fuck it. Had 1 great connect get locked up and had some beef with another one so I was pretty fucked either way but the methadone I'd doing me better than the d with the right mixers and combos. I'm no fuckin angel a
I just couldn't keep up with the amt of dough I was gonna have to spend dealing with new dudes , if I could find them at all. I'm pretty introverted so I don't go out and meet people so all that pretty much ended my dope career. How's that case go bro?
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Still dealing w it atm. It's stupid. I am glad to hear your doing ok, methadone isn't a bad gig, I bet your close to the clinic too. I'll hit you up on your cell one if these days soon, you got the same # tho right?
 
anything good going on in Boston we can talk about? as far as I go.. I GOT NOTHING! well, nothing good to say. ha. am I still using? SURE, why not!? I dont even come close to using like I once did; I almost kinda miss it but I dont have the funds or time like I once did. when I do grab something its a toss up between fent/dope and of course, mixed most of the time.

I used fent hard at one point and it was a waste of time and veins. I would get addicted to just the thought of shooting; got me high for seconds and thats about it. then I just wanted to put the needle in my arm again, again, again and again, as you know.

the dope/fent wasnt as bad; got a semi buzz but still not as good as GOOD DOPE!

GREAT DOPE!? well, havent seen in FOREVER and a DAY! but over the summer my "dude" had some good stuff that I'd buy 3 40's and I'd blast one and be "good" for LEGIT 6 FUCKING HOURS before I used another 40. nowadays I would just blast all 3 unfortunately but its good to look back at how things once were, lol

I still see people dropping/hear about people dying. I DONT UNDERSTAND IT! have I OD'd, you betcha! but I'll never understand those who drop. esp. those who were already an addict or just coming back into the habit; with my luck ill die next after saying that but still. scary just thinking about that shit, ya know!?
 
Hey friends howz things?? Haven't posted much as there's not much new goin on here...still using but honestly it doesn't do much for me anymore; don't feel a thing not a tickle. The only way I can tell if it's good is when my stomach starts growling and I start sneezing violently a couple of times. Anyways been using the same stuff for like two months and I'm used to it, that's why I can't feel it...the tan or brown rocky stuff that I have to crush up or chop it up till my arms are tired, It turns almost black or a deep brown in the spoon and smells like vinegar or sometimes Vitamin B12. Sometimes there's a residue left in the bottom of the spoon and I know that's cut. Anyways the other stuff I've dealt with recently is pretty lame...Fine China, Brainstorm,Chapos, bags with a paw print are the shittiest...nothing that's rung my bell at all!!! Well that's what's happenin here ope to hear from y'all...Cliffy what's good dude?? Be careful and take care of yourselves...RaZ
 
danamine said:
Hey SKL, is it within the rules to invite people to harm reduction events (I posted about a community naloxone training that we hosted a few weeks back). Technically, this is a "meet-up" but only in the sense that people could come to the same public space.
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that would be fine, in fact, good; you'd be more than welcome to promote this kind of thing here and indeed on a broader scale even if it would make sense (PM me for that though i.e. if you're from an organization beyond Boston/MA doing different trainings here and there or something)
 
Off the dope, went to franklin recovery and met some chill peeps, great place btw I highly recommend it. They got me on the clinic but check this , my pcp is so chill that he got me into a pain clinic somehow and they're weening me off the80mg of mdone to get me back to 60mg of oxy daily! Fuckinnn awesome! I got my script back and I ain't fuckin up this time cuz I know how wack this dope is now. I'm done. Just another chronic pain patient now, I'm happy so far... So how are my peeps doin?
 
Hate2luvDrugz said:
New to site and saw this had to reply I'm from the north shore n ppl been dropping like flies still
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I'm in Holyoke still grinding. Been getting some decent stuff still. Cliffy- good for you bro, I'll give you a ring sometime soon just to see how your doing. Other than that, some of my connects getting busted, he got raided and they found a burner. No good no good. Hope you all are finding some fire. I had some 10.5 and a bunch of other stamps lately. Good luck out there.
 
Cliffy78 said:
Off the dope, went to franklin recovery and met some chill peeps, great place btw I highly recommend it. They got me on the clinic but check this , my pcp is so chill that he got me into a pain clinic somehow and they're weening me off the80mg of mdone to get me back to 60mg of oxy daily! Fuckinnn awesome! I got my script back and I ain't fuckin up this time cuz I know how wack this dope is now. I'm done. Just another chronic pain patient now, I'm happy so far... So how are my peeps doin?
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That's an awesome chain of events brother. Glad to hear things are working out for you. I'm still staying legit on the Saugus/Lynn line dealing with the clinic bullshit. I've been planted on 50mg for a while now. Still doing the occasional speedball/benzo when money allows and drink a few beers almost every day.
 
Thanks guys I appreciate the love! Things still goin well for me but pain dr is weening me too quick off the mdone, 10mg a week is too quick IMO and from all I've read from my brothers and sisters here. Farrakhan definitely hmu please, same number just txt me up brother! My dude got busted and just got out a few days ago and hmu . Told him I'm good but we were always chill so it's all love. Effect Ty for the support bro it means a lot! Y'all are my brothers and sisters and I got mad love for y'all! Things have bben goin great in my life though and I haven't been this happy since I was a little boy before my pops took off and left my mom strung out on the pipe. I got a lot to share but I took my kpins and I'm gettin tired so I'm gonna throw on a documentary and pass out. Hope ur all getting fire and shits good for everyone, love yall, cliffy out. God bless!
 
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What people want to do by PM'ing each other, we don't really intrude on unless a truly extraordinary situation should arise; please keep requests to contact others publicly to private or off-channel means, however.
 
Skl did I do something wrong, I don't understand? I can't see that u removed anything from my post so what's up bro? I'm doing good and I can't do dope dude I'm in pm and the check levels and I go in weekly, wtf did I do bro? I never thought u were very heavy handed with the mod stick so please explain? Me and Farrakhan been boys and I just asked him to hmu, he looked out and gave me some narcan once when it was rough to get cuz I never even shot up so I don't go to the needle exchange. I'm on methadone still and I worry cause that shit builds up in the body everyday and it just keeps stacking up! My boy was nice enough to give me some narcan that tapestry said they were gonna give me at detox, they promised me 3 kits since I was completing detox and my dose wasn't holding me cuz of how much I was ising before detox and when they gave me my pee test when I entered detox they said it was mad fentanyl so of course 40mg wasn't holding me but I completed 10 days and did everything by the book and then the drive me 70miles and dropped me at the clinic. Honestly I just wanted to ask my boy to give some narcan so if I did use(really wasn't gonna but u never
Know when th pain gets bad) but I still got friends who use it would be nice to have narcan on hand to save some lives since I thought that's what bluelight was about but ummmmm, I guess not, fuck us right? We don't use MDMA so then why even bother having od? I don't understand wtf I did wrong? This is the 2nd time in all my time on bl I've had an issue where it was said I made an infraction and in both cases I don't believe I did anything wrong, once was a dude trying to cop drugs and I told him to beat it pretty much and whatever the hell this was that I did? I didn't put my number up. Yet I see posts from drug companies listing all kinda drugs for sale with their web address? Idk man seems really wack. I've totally changed my life and now I try to help everyone I meet because I've been so blessed! All my good karmas been coming back and even my numerous mental illnesses are improving, another area where I really thought I could've done some real good in the community, why embarrass and insult me like this? Maybe I should've just stayed off bl cuz I thought maybe I'd get triggered but that didn't happen at all. A friend that once gave me narcan to helpe when I was using 5 bs a day
But I guess that's not cool on bl anymore. I don't get it and don't care Farrakhan hmu player! I coulda done some good here and think I did in the time I was here. I'm gonna check the 3 other posts I made, maybe mod dude just don't like me? I always thought we were cool but idk. I know the mods don't like my boy Farrakhan but he only tried to help me by hooking me up with narcan and telling me to never shoot up, ducking solid advice from a sis dude and if u don't like him then don't take it out on me but I'll defend my boy til the end cuz he tried to save my life so that my dude idc wtf u say. Peace and love to all my fellow junkbombs and anyone who wants quality help go to greenfield recovery. They made a move "welcome to detox" starring Sandra bullock about the dr there. Best detox ever and mad chill peeps! Good luck to everyone I love u all!
 
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