I'd overdosed before, but nothing like the last month. 3 times in one month.
I guess I've overdosed on heroin before, but it was mainly just nodding out, never felt like too much. No vomiting or breathing trouble I don't think.
Sadly my dad has saved my life twice from benzos + alcohol.
The first wasn't so bad, I didn't black out that time, just started chocking on my vomit during the night and he heard me apparently at 3-4am and came to save me (he's a doctor).
The second time was recently. I decided to buy a cask of wine and I had 50 flubromazolam tabs at home. I'd taken one tab when I had 2 glasses of wine. Next thing I know it's 3 days later, I'd gone through all 50 tabs, 5L++ of wine / beer, broke several glasses somehow while searching for more wine, broke into a locked cabinet without a key to get more booze. I was fairly sore, had plenty of cuts and bruises which luckily I couldn't feel too much. I played games most of the time I think, that or I was half asleep most of the day. And finally had my life saved again. Family wasn't too happy with me.
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Overdosed on 3-meo-pcp
Injected not much more than I was doing previous shots. ~20mgs. Not sure if I got the needle out, pretty sure I did though. Blacked out and went completely catatonic. Was either unresponsive and staring straight ahead moaning or rubbing my hands through my hair over and over. I was shown a video which I didn't want to see twice. Came to a while later staring up at my mother as if I had just been born, I was very confused at what was looking at me, what this place was. Blacked out again a minute later and came to again sitting at the table and when it came back to me my first thought was "what the fuck". My mother explained what happened and it all came back to me pretty quickly after that. It was quite bad when I was conscious, but thankfully wasn't for most of it. They were considering calling the CAT team.
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Overdosed on 25c-nbome - worst experience ever, threw it all away after this, visuals have never been good and trip has no depth, even at overdose level. I'll never touch benzos due to my risk taking behaviour lately (ever since heroin, I inject things a lot, combined with benzos and it's been a bad year, not a lot of it has been enjoyable)
Injected (very fucking stupid) a dose, which was a lot more than I thought it was in a measured solution. Realised it was too much pretty quickly, but didn't think it would get more intense after the first minute, but it did. Walked outside to my parents, who quickly worked out I'd taken something when I wasn't talking and just kind of standing near them. There wasn't much anxiety, really but it was terrifying.
First everything began waving as I moved my head, I was completely convinced that all of my nbome powder was somehow all over me and my parents. I kept saying "no! don't touch it!", I thought we were both progressively dosing more and more through our skin. That there were sirens above and medical teams coming for an emergency (which I thought they would all die from touching the powder not knowing what it was).
The next part was bad. I became more and more unresponsive, what I was saying to my parents made little sense, they really shouldn't have tried to talk to me or ask me questions. My mental state became more and more alien and kept changing very quickly. I was quite paranoid yet too out of it to be anxious or scared, I just witnessed everything basically and it was terrifying mentally.
I felt what must have been brain signals or messages going to my body but they were not normal at all, extremely hard to describe, as if I wasn't human anymore. All rational thought ceased and I was left with single words or thinking in electric signals of what I was feeling. Felt very electric (a lot of nbome feels very electric).
It all suddenly stopped and I was left with no feeling, no memories or real thought process, just my visual field (with no visuals happening), looking at my mother. I concluded that I was dead, I really felt dead, nothing like the void on 5-meo-dmt. Just gone. Thankfully this state didn't last too long.
Next and finally was the two states of completely believing my hallucinations. I was very convinced that they were real.
First was that police and medics were coming to arrest me, that they had found all my drug use and were coming to lock me away and ruin my life. Plenty of helicopters outside and sirens. I was so out of it that I thought I saw full people standing very close to me (police) pretty sure I did, otherwise I just couldn't distinguish between reality and my imagination. I felt very bad during this 10-15 minutes, scared and afraid of prison, etc.
Then it all changed and got better very suddenly. I felt a very very strong rush of confidence and euphoria and some quite amazing images in my mind. I thought I had become a god at one point, as if I had won some sort of prize or competition and that I was now going to be a millionaire and change the world. I felt amazing, I was crying and laughing in joy at thoughts of my friends and life. How I was going to touch so many people, how so many people would be proud of me with what I had supposedly won or achieved. I asked for a pen and paper because of the what I felt I had unlocked, never got it though.
After it all calmed down I still fully believed a few of my hallucinations until the next morning. I still felt very confident and good, as if I was destined for greatness. I wanted to talk to my friends, but thankfully I didn't.
Looking back on it, it was all complete crap, a very useless trip. Just very overwhelming and intense, no real insight or depth. I've never believed my hallucinations were real until nbome, which was very frightening, could've ended badly. I very possibly could've died at the dose and method let alone my actions.
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Lesson learnt that I can't trust myself with benzos or needles. Using needles after heroin has done me more damage than heroin, which I haven't used in quite a while thankfully. It's surprising how quickly it can all go downhill with your usage, I was fine 2 years ago before I'd touched heroin. I had a lot more fun back then when I was more responsible with my use and methods.
More drugs does not equal better times, be careful please.