Sytryan
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2019
- Messages
- 52
A very close friend of mine had a problem with a severe benzodiazepine dependency in his younger years. I believe his DOCs were temazepam first and foremost, then alprazolam, then etizolam. He has an immense feeling of regret when he reflects on the 3-4 year period where he has no memories of anything whatsoever. During his BZD addiction, he was doing all sorts of dumb shit, no doubt aided by the inhibition-reducing effects of BZDs - including but not limited to: forging prescriptions for absurd amounts of controlled substances (I believe he told me he did a script for 300 ct 30mg temazepam, 300ct 10mg ritalin, and 180ct Adderall 30s., made several duplicates, and attempted to fill them... and he got away with it for a little while too, until his MD got in touch and told him he was no longer considered a patient in his care, threatening legal sanctions, and to this day he has great difficulty filing the simplest of Rxes... they must be checked manually and can only be dispensed at ONE pharmacy, of his choice, which cannot be changed too often.) When the pharmaceutical BZDs ran out he turned to the darknet to purchase bulk alprazolam powder, supposedly pinched from stock at a compounding plant, or etizolam: depending on the price.
He eventually managed to get his shit together and execute an incredibly rapid diazepam taper, which liberated him from the daily requirement to be pumped full of sedatives. Unfortunately his asocial, paranoid habits developed over years of drug use and isolation, plus the withdrawal effects/PAWS from a severe and long BZD addiction, rendered him a bit of a hikkikomori - he didn't feel comfortable socializing or going into public. Over time he learned to deal with his fears and became a more functional person, thankfully. Goes to show that no dependency, no matter how big is too much to handle.
Thanks for sharing your friend's story as it is a story of hope. Yea for some reason Diazepam works wonders for tapering & coming off these meds without much pain - I was on diazepam during my detox phase in rehab but I kept having Deja Vu experiences at night & could hear people talking in my head etc luckily all of that went away at the end of that - like the previous poster mentioned, I am grateful I have got off light so far and know well that if I start using again, sooner or later it's going to end up there.