• HEALTH & RECOVERY
    Welcome Guest
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules Thread Directory 1 Thread Directory 2
    Mindfulness Links Addiction & Mind
    Sober Living Partner Program (SLiPP)
  • H&R Moderators: VerbalTruist | cdin | Lil'LinaptkSix

December Getting/Staying Clean/Sober Thread, v More Holidaze Ahead

Status
Not open for further replies.
Congrats bpt,
I scored a job cleaning for rich people...

Captn Im doing ok now that Im keeping busy with work. Hobbies and wasting time seem to fill the in between time nicely now too.
Could use some healthful activities in the mix... Maybe in the new years?

How about you? Everyone else?
 
Thanks cap'n I'm glad. It's in an extremely horrible neighborhood but oh well
 
God I hope so lol, boss lady said there's some crazy ass shit that goes down
 
I was getting a sandwich at Subway yesterday and there were these two sketchy looking kids wearing hoodies with the hoods pulled up in front of me in the line and they get to the cashier and one of them grabs the tip jar and they both took off running out of the store. It was late-ish so there was enough money in the tip jar that the two girls working there called the cops.

The craziest thing that happened to me as a cashier was pretty tame. I was working the graveyard shift at a convenience store in Iowa City and I got busted (or rather the store did) for selling an underage kid cigarettes around 3am. The cops sent him in there. Why the fuck the cops were using a school age kid for that purpose at that time of night? At least I had enough experience being on the wrong side of cops that I knew better than to ask.
 
I watched a store get robbed at gunpoint In Dallas a few years ago. From the clerks reaction, it happened alot
 
This week while cleaning up my dad’s house there were a lot of meds I thought it would have been perfect for me during that day. I am glad they were separated by days and dosages. Even happier for not not being that anxious about it. Nevertheless, that’s something I don’t want to experience again. Will be 3 years sober early in February.
 
aihfl said:
What medication got stolen? Trazodone is a pretty effective sleep aid. In fact, I found it to be TOO effective. Also curious how bad kratom withdrawal is; I was thinking about trying it but don't want to get addicted. I've had it with withdrawals of any kind.

A few friends from my AA homegroup go to trivia nite regularly at a local bar (oh the irony) and one of them congratulated me on kicking nicotine and said it's the most difficult thing they've tried to do. I actually had no problems with it, but they managed to kick alcohol, something I've been unable to do despite my best efforts.
Click to expand...

Temazepam. Boo. Whatever, life goes on.

Kratom withdrawal sucked. It wasn't at all as bad as getting off heroin, buprenorphine or methadone, but there was a long period of low level GI distress than was super uncomfortable.

My mistake was not having enough comfort meds (well, and some of them disappearing), and especially just jumping off instead of tapering. I was taking about 53g a day of kratom for a while there, and coming off that wasn't pleasant. Everything was easily managed except the GI issues. I was kinda surprised, as I've never experienced any GI related issues with getting off kratom. But when it's taken like an opioid, it acts like an opioid.

It's nice to know I have zero desire to use kratom since getting off it a week or two ago. And apologies for being MIA. Been holed up in my cocoon doing that, hence the absence.

If anyone is ever curious, for all practical purposes using kratom like an opioid WILL result in uncomfortable withdrawal. I imagine using it like coffee less so, but if I'm gonna use something that nasty, it's too easy to want to use in unwise ways.

Back to my entheogens every once in a while and herbs. Luckily I stumbled upon a joint I forgot I had this morning. "Free drugs" are always fun (saving it for bedtime)...
 
Just got accused of driving around my old haunts. Lol I live 40 miles from there, and am watched basically 24/7
 
On day one off the alcohol. Relapsed on Tuesday night, drank all day Wednesday and never made it to my job Thursday morning. It was a real good job too I was only there 3 weeks.

I've got to do something different. I don't want to do this shit anymore, and I've said that a thousand times, but always end up fucking up. Hopefully my parents will loan me this 200 I need to make the rent at the end of the month. They've loaned (basically given) me so much money over the last 2 months because I fucked up another job that I had had for almost a year because I had another job offer that I assumed would be starting sooner than what it did.

I had to tell my daughter I have the flu today because there was no way I could go to this family christmas eve party. My parents took her and I'm just sitting here feeling like such a piece of shit, and dealing with the anxiety and random bullshit of detoxing alcohol. Puked a bunch this morning. Just glad I didn't go any longer, just from 4 and a half days of drinking I feel horrible. Oh, and I have to tell my grandma tonight that I fucked up my job and so have to put off paying on a loan I owe her for a while.

My anxiety is through the roof. Also have to deal with if I'm gonna go to this other Christmas party tomorrow, which I don't think I can, so now my daughter doesn't get to stay with me tonight and open presents here, she'll be at her mom's. And since I don't think I can bring myself to go to that party I'll only be able to see her for like 20 minutes or something because she only has like 2 hour window to go to that party. Sorry this is long, I had to vent. I feel like such a fucking piece of shit.

Now I have to hurry up and go out and find a job through a temp service on Tuesday. I just need to make it through these few days. Wish me luck. Hope you guys are doing better than me. I definitely have to try something different though. I don't sit well with 12 step ideology, but I need to finally go to Smart Recovery like I keep saying.
 
RDP89 said:
On day one off the alcohol. Relapsed on Tuesday night, drank all day Wednesday and never made it to my job Thursday morning. It was a real good job too I was only there 3 weeks.

I've got to do something different. I don't want to do this shit anymore, and I've said that a thousand times, but always end up fucking up. Hopefully my parents will loan me this 200 I need to make the rent at the end of the month. They've loaned (basically given) me so much money over the last 2 months because I fucked up another job that I had had for almost a year because I had another job offer that I assumed would be starting sooner than what it did.

I had to tell my daughter I have the flu today because there was no way I could go to this family christmas eve party. My parents took her and I'm just sitting here feeling like such a piece of shit, and dealing with the anxiety and random bullshit of detoxing alcohol. Puked a bunch this morning. Just glad I didn't go any longer, just from 4 and a half days of drinking I feel horrible. Oh, and I have to tell my grandma tonight that I fucked up my job and so have to put off paying on a loan I owe her for a while.

My anxiety is through the roof. Also have to deal with if I'm gonna go to this other Christmas party tomorrow, which I don't think I can, so now my daughter doesn't get to stay with me tonight and open presents here, she'll be at her mom's. And since I don't think I can bring myself to go to that party I'll only be able to see her for like 20 minutes or something because she only has like 2 hour window to go to that party. Sorry this is long, I had to vent. I feel like such a fucking piece of shit.

Now I have to hurry up and go out and find a job through a temp service on Tuesday. I just need to make it through these few days. Wish me luck. Hope you guys are doing better than me. I definitely have to try something different though. I don't sit well with 12 step ideology, but I need to finally go to Smart Recovery like I keep saying.
Click to expand...

Have you tried therapy, or a psychiatrist? <3

Don't give up the fight man.
 
^agreed, you'd make a good potential candidate for something like naltrexone or baclofen.
 
Thanks Captain. I did do therapy once but not for very long, and at the time I was just doing to not have to do another outpatient program. I also don't currently have insurance, so I kinda gotta take care of that first before I can do any of that.

I'm torn between a psychologist and a psychiatrist, because on the one hand I don't really want meds/ don't believe any will work for me, but at the same time maybe if I found the right thing, it would be easier to stay away from self medicating. I was diagnosed A.D.D. as a young kid, and I'm pretty sure I have more undiagnosed mental health issues that I have always tended to self medicate.

I'm also very unfulfilled career wise, and I want to do something more, but I seem to lack the motivation to get beyond the "yeah I need to figure out what I wanna do and start on it". I really procrastinate too much. But then that's a vicious cycle because it's one of the things that leads me back to substances. And the insurance thing sucks because now once I start a job I've got to wait 90 days to get the damn insurance.
 
toothpastedog said:
^agreed, you'd make a good potential candidate for something like naltrexone or baclofen.
Click to expand...

Fuck Naltrexone. Makes me a zombie. I have been interested in baclofen. I have the whole problem right now with insurance. I'm gonna have to wait until I gain employment and work 90 days to get insurance before I can do anything. I would try to get Obamacare to bridge the gap, but I already know from trying to get it before the prices they quoted were too expensive for me. Thanks for reminding me of baclofen toothpastedog. I could see the big hurdle with that being finding a doctor that know what the fuck baclofen is. I guess it could be could to try to find an addiction specialist?? Also, isn't that an off label use for it? Which means alot of doctors may be weary of prescribing it for that.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top