15th Issue Heroin Discussion v. Be the Death of Me

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Chinky maybe thats what you need right now in your life,a new start,you never know you dont want to end up old with regrets like me!
 
chinky said:
the marina del rey area

and i know what you guys are talking about but like i said it just akes big balls to pack up and go. but im single at the moment and got no kids so there is nothing holding me here. its just i got a habit and moving that far from home is just scary. ive lived away from home before but i was never farther then 3hours, so iwas always able to get back home on a half tank of gas. if i move out there, imma fly and all im bringing is whats in my pockets and luggage..thats scary to have your life packed up like that and starting over 2000miles from anything familiar. its not like we are kids and moving to a different school and you are almost forcved to ineract and become friends with people, i would have 1 friend out there and thats the only thing i know. i wouldnt even know a good palce to get a burger lol

the dope im not too worried about ause i would bring subs and if all fails, ill be sick for a week but have the best weed to help.
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Man i had the exact same situation when i went out to Cali. Half G a day H habit along with pills and i was worried about the WD's. I actually took a bus though and saw the country and got my nerves a little calmed down before i got there. I brought only 1 8mg sub with me and just did the WD's the last 2 days of my bus ride. I only had 2 bags with me and it was basically my wardrobe. You can always have the rest of your shit shipped out to you if you need it man. I'm just saying it's a great chance for a fresh start. Yea there is H out there but with the help of a clean friend it is a lot easier than being in a place where all you haveta do is call and drive to get it. You will meet people easily dude. Cali for the most part has a very outgoing social culture. And its actually pretty nice when your going through something like dropping a habit to not know anyone and not have that temptation. I've seen you say before a lot of it is mental and thats the mental part is knowing you can cop anytime you want. Out there knowing that you can't just make a call will help a lot in just being able to say fuck it and give up the habit.

You know i wouldn't be typing out a post like this if I hadn't dealt with the same thing. You were around when i did all this shit, and judging by your posts since i got out in November it sounds like your habit has gone further than what it used to be, where you wouldn't use more than 2-3 days in a row.

Like you said dude no kids, no wife, nothing to hold you in chitown except that habit, and you realize what it's doin to ya. You know its your choice just make sure you evaluate it carefully. Ya never know what could happen.
 
so my dumb ass didnt follow my own edirections and i dropped my entire gram of raw on my carpet..ive been sitting here for the past hour picking up little pieces and trying to get everybit i can, but it sucks when the pieces are smaller then a half grain of rice..like normally i only crush of half a gram at a time for this reason, but today my guy hit me with the farkest raw ive seen and he was bragging anout it and i kind of lost track of what i was doing and i ended up crushing most of it up all at once. i reached over to get my mirror and when i reached over my mattress moved and the raw rolled right off my bed into the carpet.now i was lucky that 1/3 of it landed on the magaszine i was reading yesterday and just so happened to be on the ground next to my bed..the other 1/3 i was able to pick up in little little tiny pebbles that took me about an hour. and the last 1/2 i can see clear as day in my carpet but its all ground up powder and i have no chance of getting it out.

lucky i picked up 4bags of his shake to go with it and i had maybe .2-.3 of raw left over from 2 days ago..but i bought all this to last me tonite and the next day or 2 and now i got enough to get high tonite and to hold me over tomoirrow and saturday morning but imma have to cop on saturday again when i planned not to.

i cant believe my dumb ass did this shit..its like when you got your weed broken up and then your spill the blunt and it goes all over your clothes and all you get back is like 1/2 maybe 3/4 but its neverthe same blunt as it was before you spilled it..same shit her except its not petty weed, its fuckin heroin...imma just leave it there til im super sick one day and vaccum it up as best as i can i just snort the entire pile of dirt lol
 
^^

I'd be freaking out and putting holes in walls if I did something like that! Hah. I freak out when I spill even a little bit of my shot.
 
^^ oh man, i was so pissed i couldnt even do anything about it except get on my grind and try and get as much up as i could

chefman said:
Chinky maybe thats what you need right now in your life,a new start,you never know you dont want to end up old with regrets like me!
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thanks captain obvious for pointing out exactly the same thing we have been talking about for the last page

Mzral said:
This is by far the best thing I've seen posted on BL.
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i feel really bad for you then, like if i was in your shoes, i might just kill myself cause thats how pathetic i would feel

nowdubnvr6 said:
Man i had the exact same situation when i went out to Cali. Half G a day H habit along with pills and i was worried about the WD's. I actually took a bus though and saw the country and got my nerves a little calmed down before i got there. I brought only 1 8mg sub with me and just did the WD's the last 2 days of my bus ride. I only had 2 bags with me and it was basically my wardrobe. You can always have the rest of your shit shipped out to you if you need it man. I'm just saying it's a great chance for a fresh start. Yea there is H out there but with the help of a clean friend it is a lot easier than being in a place where all you haveta do is call and drive to get it. You will meet people easily dude. Cali for the most part has a very outgoing social culture. And its actually pretty nice when your going through something like dropping a habit to not know anyone and not have that temptation. I've seen you say before a lot of it is mental and thats the mental part is knowing you can cop anytime you want. Out there knowing that you can't just make a call will help a lot in just being able to say fuck it and give up the habit.

You know i wouldn't be typing out a post like this if I hadn't dealt with the same thing. You were around when i did all this shit, and judging by your posts since i got out in November it sounds like your habit has gone further than what it used to be, where you wouldn't use more than 2-3 days in a row.

Like you said dude no kids, no wife, nothing to hold you in chitown except that habit, and you realize what it's doin to ya. You know its your choice just make sure you evaluate it carefully. Ya never know what could happen.
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ehh my habit for the most part is the same, but psychologically my tolerancve shot way up. well maybe my dope tolerance did too cause i pretty much stick to raw now and i only assume its higher then what it was. but money wise and rate of use is still the same. i still follow my rules and like i dont even remember the last time i used 2days in a row to get high..what i want to know is why did you go out there so unprepared? only 2bags and 1 sub to get you threw it all?
 
Issues with the living arrangement between me and my dad. He's a huge alcoholic and i couldnt stand being around him so i said fuck it and peaced out. I had $ in savings so i wasnt worried plus i wanted to get outta arkansas for a long time. Like i said left the fiance` my shit in storage my car all that shit and just peaced out. Best decision i ever made. No nagging fiance no dope habbit no car to take care of it was straight. And i knew my friend i was going to stay with wouldnt let me be doing pills or H at his house. Even though northern california has a huge H problem.
 
i think if my buddy says i got a job at his resturant i can grab 5k cash and be able to live normal out there. by normal i mean, not in a rush to find a great job, being able to go out on the weekend and pay for drinks and really just live comfortable. if he says i gotta pay rent well then that money isnt lasting too long out there with the high cost of livin g is out there in cali

maybe i would try my luck at acting lol. ive never studied it but when ther eis a 7year old on the nominees list this year for the oscars..i gotta think i should be able to just jump in with no experiance. i always wanted to be an actor but to me that was even more unrealistic then making it to MLB or NFL. i always wanted to act but i never thouyght once of doing a school play to see if its even something i like. really acting woulkd be the complete opposite of what my normal personality is but fuck if i grow the balls to move, im already half way there, i might as well grow the rest and try to act lol (i know how unrealistic this all is but its fun to think about), i prolly have a better chance at winning the powerball then getting a job as an actor in a tvshow or movie
 
i think if i came into money and had a chance to open a business, i would open up a high end /rare sneaker shoe store and also mainly just sell other accessories like hats, belts, sunglasses and fresh white and black tees

that right now is the type of business i would like to run..aside from a marijuana convience store or licensed grow house in colorado lol
 
my friend moved out to denver like 9months ago to work for a grow and i think he is gonna set up his own. he had the best connects ive ever seen and i only wishi kenw about them b efore i did. but im also glad cause the guy in cali got popped shipping them
 
Chinky either go to Cali or hit up your buddy in Colorado. You strike me as a conisuier of cannabis, maybe you should follow your passion and start a legit weed operation. I have a lot of regrets of thngs I didn't do. What's the worst thatwill happen you have to move back home? At least you can say you tried.
 
chinky said:
i feel really bad for you then, like if i was in your shoes, i might just kill myself cause thats how pathetic i would feel
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Man, there is not a moodier group of people than dope heads, I swear. I know how impersonal the internet is and all, but clearly I was being a bit facetious in my post, as that is obviously not the greatest thing ever. I just found it amusing because I was high when I read it, and I found it to be a humorously ignorant post. Also while reading it, I heard it in my head with Project Pat's voice and that made it funnier to me (I was soon to find out from a friend that it was from Waka Flocka Flame). I see your posts here and had a very minor exchange with you regarding that Coheed dude that robbed the pharmacy. My original opinion of you was that you seemed like a fairly chill person and I wouldn't have put so much effort into writing any of this if you hadn't come off as so offended by me finding Tank's post humorous that you would tell me, if you were I, you'd kill yourself and how "pathetic" it is.

Shoot your dope from now on and lighten up...
 
Chinky just go man, you'll probably have the experience of a lifetime. Like chef said you don't want to look back at this opportunity then in 10 years while you're still in the same place watching the same stupid tv you'll kick yourself for not doing it. I know it takes big balls but you don't seem like someone who is afraid of a challenge. The worst thing that will happen is you'll end up right back which where you are anyway. If I've repeated what's been said I apologize I have a job and I can't read every single word of every post.
 
Im sure you can go back to your moms house if it doesnt work out chinko
 
Did my first shot of dope in like two years. That's the second time I've ever shot up n my friend did it for me. I did a bag n got a little high. I tried doin one later by myself n fucked it up it pissed me off I just tossed the shit out n started snortin.
 
you could have plugged what solution you had left, not wasting it. alternatively you could have filtered out what blood, if any, was in the solution an waterlined it - let it absorb in your nasal passage. if you were blocked up it would have been the go. remember that if there's ever a next time because that way you're not throwing away dope.
 
Yeh I prob shoulda plugged it didn't really think things through haha. But yeh there was blood in the syringe but I moved it n left the vein. I'm a beginner to this stuff n didn't wanna miss a shot that sounds painfull.
 
Mzral said:
Man, there is not a moodier group of people than dope heads, I swear. I know how impersonal the internet is and all, but clearly I was being a bit facetious in my post, as that is obviously not the greatest thing ever. I just found it amusing because I was high when I read it, and I found it to be a humorously ignorant post. Also while reading it, I heard it in my head with Project Pat's voice and that made it funnier to me (I was soon to find out from a friend that it was from Waka Flocka Flame). I see your posts here and had a very minor exchange with you regarding that Coheed dude that robbed the pharmacy. My original opinion of you was that you seemed like a fairly chill person and I wouldn't have put so much effort into writing any of this if you hadn't come off as so offended by me finding Tank's post humorous that you would tell me, if you were I, you'd kill yourself and how "pathetic" it is.

Shoot your dope from now on and lighten up...
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you people are unbelieveable..

its obvious i was also being facetious, so why write a fuckin paragragh?
 
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