15th Issue Heroin Discussion v. Be the Death of Me

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HighonLife said:
you may not be a fan of Oxycodone

but do you really think you could be on maintenance and use it properly with a drug like that?
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I have used it to taper off of dope before. I had a limited supply but it worked out well. I just went down by 10mg a day, then took 5mg, skipped a day, took 5mg, then was done.
 
Lifetime movie herion addicts gets to move in w/ halle berry n now neighbor give him awesome job only in the movies
 
Mzral said:
I finally decided I had to enroll in a suboxone program due to external pressures beyond my control. Financial strains, family disruptions, a full time job, and lastly my health are all key reasons for my temporary switch to a maintenance drug. I'm looking to be on subs for no longer than one full month, as I'm just planning on doing a taper.

I don't think anything could fill the void that heroin will leave, so I won't even try to kid myself into believing that there's something else I could take, or that subs would do the trick, in that way. Knowing that fact sort of places my mind at ease. I had a really good run this time and since I'm on a waiting list, I've been assured that I won't be administered any subs until after 3 weeks or longer. That said, I am trying to live it up as much as I can; enjoying the rest of my time with dope. What little time I have left.

I would probably just do this cold turkey since I'm no stranger to it, despite how bad it motherfucking sucks, but having a full time job makes it an unrealistic approach. I can overcome the pain and sickness but I know if I have access to the drug, I'll want to get high andI'll just go for it. I need something like subs that will render my preferred opiates ineffective.

My goal is not soberiety, but rather moderation. I need to take an extended break and get myself back to normal before I can even think about going back to opiates.
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Not trying to be a dick but with that kind of attitude you might as well not even bother with suboxone, or any drug for that matter. Nothing is ever going to work of you go into the situation with a "there is nothing out there to fill the heroin void and I would be foolish to think the suboxone will" type of attitude. I have found that suboxone is the best choice if you are honestly trying to clean yourself up. Also I'm not sure about your situation but you are going into it kind of blindly if you think you will be able to do a one month taper and come put anywhere close to "normal". The cravings, albeit minimized, will return one you quit the suboxone and if you already in the mindset of it's not going to work then chances are you will be right back on heroin with a 1 month break....that's if you follow thru with the full month of suboxone.


Also, not sure how the suboxone program is set up up there but I know down here it is awfully expensive. Why would you spend so much money for 1 months worth of help? Don't go in there and tell them you only want to be on it for a month either, I doubt they would accept you.



Having said all that I also have to say that if you begin to take it more seriously I would seriously consider a new program. Any program that has a 3 week waiting period doesn't seem to have the addict's needs etc at heart. Anyone that is familiar with addiction (especially opiates) knows 3 weeks is a hell of a long time and anything can, and will, happen. Shit I am willing to bet all of us know it can take 20 minutes for that strong urge to get help to disappear. If I was serious about getting clean and had the problems you do I would be unwilling to wait 3 weeks.


You don't necessarily have to get into a suboxone "program". Find a psychiatrist that has the proper liscense (any doctor that can preceibe suboxone had to get a special, separate liscense to do so) and begin to see him for therapy and tell him you are an opiate addict and would like to attempt to get clean using cognitive therapy coupled with suboxone maintenance. It will be cheaper and it has been my experience that this avenue tends to be more geared towards the addicts needs and they concentrate on your success, not the money.


Again, I am not trying to be a dick I am just trying to give you my input and advice.
 
That program is practically setting addicts up for failure, then again a lot of programs use that approach to weed out the people who are honestly trying to get help and have re motivation and drive to wait for 3 weeks. I think it's bullshit but thats pretty much how it works.



What area are you in? If you need me to I can use my resources to find you a private practice psychiatrist that is able to prescribe suboxone.

Also: what are the details of your situation? Age? Sex? Tolerance? Length of use?
 
Yeah man good luck scagnattie! Good thing ya got them benzos. That stuff always helps with withdraws very good drugs to have on deck. Matter of fact I'm pickin up 6 bars for myself in a little bit just waitin for this girl to txt me. Now she's black n I don't dig the dark meat but she's an exeption. Gotta nice fat ass not too fat n titties. Mmm yeh id like to party with that.

Thing is she's a coke/rock dealer. Don't know her too good she's got her own thing goin on n we help each other out. I help hook her up with dope n pills n she helps me get bars. I will hit her up for rock but that's somethin I do once ina blue moonn like once every few months just buy a few grams n go at it nonstop like a muthafuckin fiend haha.
 
Sounds right, lol. After smoking free rock all week I need to allow down..7 of yay, 4mg klonopin, bud,and qwho knows what. Lol. Just wish I had dope...
 
I've been on suboxone for 18 months I'm currently taking 2 of the 8mg/2mg sublingual films n I'm going to run short this month by like 4 days so I cut my dose to 1 a day so I don't run out but I'm still short. I know drs tell you not to change your own dose but I knew I had to cause if not it would lead to cravings n I can't deal with the cravings ill be too tempted. I don't want to do H. N I don't want to wd. I'm pregnant so I don't need any extra stress. I need ideas on what to take that will help with c oping an the wds.
 
Just ask your doctor. If you have been going to him for 18 months and you are pregnant he will most likely give you a script for enough to get you to the next script and verbally repromand you. Seriously, just ask your doctor.



How are you pregnant and on suboxone? I thought that was one of the only reasons they will prescribe subutex and a substitute...
 
Mr.Scagnattie said:
Trying to get back on the suboxone today.... wish me luck peepz. I have some klonopin to help the transition.. i hope I get lucky and it isn't too bad. :\
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best of luck brother man, it sounds like you could really do with it right now for getting back on track without the gorilla on the back beating it's chest to be fed. best of luck, i hope it works out for you man :)
 
Mommy2Be61313 said:
I've been on suboxone for 18 months I'm currently taking 2 of the 8mg/2mg sublingual films n I'm going to run short this month by like 4 days so I cut my dose to 1 a day so I don't run out but I'm still short. I know drs tell you not to change your own dose but I knew I had to cause if not it would lead to cravings n I can't deal with the cravings ill be too tempted. I don't want to do H. N I don't want to wd. I'm pregnant so I don't need any extra stress. I need ideas on what to take that will help with c oping an the wds.
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forreal how are you preggo and on subs?

you should have just took the 3-5days to kick when you found out as the beginning and just got clean...and eitherway 19months is crazy to be on sunb maintence, you should have weened off yourself like 8months ago sincve your doc didnt..cause goodluck trying to do it now, subs WD i hear is fucking worse then dope WD itself..

if you choose to do dope at this point, well then i can tell your gonna be a great parent 8)...dont do that shit please? do it for your kid,and not for your self.. dont be selfish
if you must im sure you can ask around and find someone youj know with subs. everydope user no mattered how sheltered and a loner, knows at least one other dope/iopiate user and that person knows many more..just find the subs that way instead of getting bitched at by your dr


i wanna know how you ran out? there is no way you need 16 mg of subs a day, you prolly dont even needa full 8, subs are overprescribed, next time you do it only do 8mg or start to ween off and go down to 10mg for ths first week or so and then go down another mg or 2 and keep doing that everyweek/every other week and before you know it you wil be down to needing 1-2mg if that in less then a year
 
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^^ everything i have seen says its better to stay on maintenance while preganant n weenin the kid off once he is born cuz WD could kill the fetus

im no Dr mommy2be but i think its in your childs best interest for you to not WD 16mg a day sounds like typical suboxone overprescribing to me but you need to talk about this with your dr. if your preggers he should have some kind of heart (if not for you for your kid) n make an attempt to get you more meds n keep you outta WD
 
Hey quick question y'all when shooting is it safe to do an extremely slow shot? I was plannin on shootn tomorow and was wonderin if I could inject slowly as to it would hit me but I do it slowly enough as to where id make sure I get fucked up as I wanna be n not go overboard.
 
^shooting st a nice slow is recommended as it could mean the difference between overdosing or not. for instance you may come across an unusually extra strong batch and shooting it all at once at a steady pace may be too much and put you out. taking it slow you start to feel the effects before finishing the shot, giving you the chance to stop and pull out before finishing and limiting the chance of overdosing.

some guides even recommend stopping halfway through the shot for the same reason. stopping to get a gauge of how strong the hit is going to be then continuing and finishing the shot,
 
Suboxone is the nastiest tasting shit ever...I threatened suicide to get into tinley park for some free benzo's the last time I kicked (2years now) before I opted for methadone, again, and subox, shits so nasty....like eating orange chalk.
 
Was going to respond to MemphisX3 around quarter to 2AM last night but I was way too high and zoning out to Fripp & Eno's Evening Star.

First off, thank you HighonLife and tbone for your responses and support; much appreciated you guys.

@ tbone, I totally hear what you're saying about the "last dance(s)" with one's DOC, especially if it happens to be dope. Just so you know, I haven't really changed my routines or upped my dosages just because I know I'll be getting off dope soon. I still purchase my regular amounts, I work with the same doses I feel comfortable with; employing the methods of harm reduction as necessary. I don't plan on changing anything or going on insane binges where I'm dropping ridiculous amounts of cash and sticking a needle in my arm every five minutes. I'm basically out to just score the best product that's available to me, and enjoy myself when I'm off of work, or taking it easy on the weekends.

I grabbed some really killer dope last night and still had some other stuff left over from a G I copped on Friday. When my main connect starts getting bunk product from his plug (this doesn't happen frequently but it is inevitable and will happen) he calls me up specifically and has me guinea pig the product for him, since he obviously doesn't use. These trial bags are at no cost to me, and after we meet I immediately fix up and hit him back to give him the results. He had me try stuff on Thursday night and I had to give it a 0 (he told me to rate it 1 out of 10, haha). No rush, no taste, no nothing; the gear was absolute garbage. However, we met up yesterday and he has me try new stuff, telling me that his plug told him, admittingly, that it was less cut. Fixed right up and the shit hit me pretty well. I texted him immediately and told him that the gear was a major improvement over Thursday's shit. To be fair and honest, I rated it a very solid 7.

@ Memphis, no worries about coming off as a "dick"; this is a social forum where we can air out our thoughts and opinions, and I'm open-minded enough to absorb what other people have to say.

"Not trying to be a dick but with that kind of attitude you might as well not even bother with suboxone, or any drug for that matter. Nothing is ever going to work of you go into the situation with a "there is nothing out there to fill the heroin void and I would be foolish to think the suboxone will" type of attitude."

What I was trying to convey was that some people attempt to literally substitute or find something else that will give them a similar feeling that their DOC would. They still want that high, so they start taking something else to compensate for their DOC that has been taken away either by choice or by the legal system, etc. I was trying to say that I enjoy heroin so much that I know there is nothing else out there that will make me feel the same, or will trick me into perceiving that it's giving me a similar effect. I'm not getting on subs to chase the high. I don't plan on switching to pot & smoking a bunch again, or turning to alcohol and binge drinking, just so I don't have to be sober. Heroin is what I liked the most, and since I won't be doing it, I'm not looking to take something else just to make me intoxicated for the sake of being unsober. That was my point. I'm looking to clean up, and I'm going to deal with being sober for awhile (or semi-sober since suboxone is still a drug I'll be ingesting).

"you are going into it kind of blindly if you think you will be able to do a one month taper and come put anywhere close to "normal". The cravings, albeit minimized, will return one you quit the suboxone and if you already in the mindset of it's not going to work then chances are you will be right back on heroin with a 1 month break....that's if you follow thru with the full month of suboxone."

By "normal" I meant not going into horrible withdrawals; it had nothing to do with any psychological effects now or later on. I'm fully aware that I will always have cravings; I'm a heroin user who thoroughly enjoys the effects of the drug. The point of only wanting to be on subs for a month is so I don't develop a physical dependency on it. I need something that will allow me to taper accordingly, so that I can minimize the nastier symptoms of withdrawal and to give myself a little bit of time so that I can't just run back out to score dope. I usually breakdown in withdrawal and buy dope because my mind knows that I just need one single shot to feel "normal" again, and being someone that works full time and has to be on top of their game, it makes it easier for me to justify using, so I run out, grab, fix up, and end my current dopesick spell.

"Also, not sure how the suboxone program is set up up there but I know down here it is awfully expensive. Why would you spend so much money for 1 months worth of help? Don't go in there and tell them you only want to be on it for a month either, I doubt they would accept you."

Even if I had to pay out of pocket it for it, it would actually be less expensive than keeping up with my current dope habit. However, heroin and prescription painkillers are such a problem back in my hometown that the local health clinic was given a grant to start a suboxone program for people who they feel meet the "criteria" for the drug. It's not going to cost me a thing, I just have to "qualify", which in fact I did, being someone who isn't a poly-substance abuser, having a full time job, and displaying intelligence and an eagerness to get off of dope. I already had my in-take, and I just have to honor my counselling appointments every Friday in order to be enrolled. I mean fuck, my counselor was pissed that she's not getting her phone calls returned from the woman who has the final say in who gets on subs (she is the head of the program). She told me there is this one girl who they enrolled into the program for an addiction to painkillers yet she's also still a raging alcoholic and shoots up cocaine on the reg. My counselor was like 'uh this program is totally not designed for someone like that and they administered it to her, so if she can get on it, you most definitely can'. I guess my counselor also has one more client she's assigned to who is almost exactly like me. Works, tries doing the right thing, and is trying to get off dope so he's not getting dopesick and blowing all his hard earned cash on the drug.

"Don't go in there and tell them you only want to be on it for a month either, I doubt they would accept you."

Already did, because I had to tell them what my goals and expectations were, when enrolled into the program. In fact they encourage and prefer people who seem motivated to not want to be stuck on suboxone long term. They're more willing to give you suboxone if you present yourself as responsible and non drug seeking. If you come off as someone who wants to get on subs so you can trade your addiction from dope, oxy, etc. to subs, then that gets frowned upon. That makes sense...

"I would seriously consider a new program. Any program that has a 3 week waiting period doesn't seem to have the addict's needs etc at heart. Anyone that is familiar with addiction (especially opiates) knows 3 weeks is a hell of a long time and anything can, and will, happen. Shit I am willing to bet all of us know it can take 20 minutes for that strong urge to get help to disappear. If I was serious about getting clean and had the problems you do I would be unwilling to wait 3 weeks."

You're partially right when you talk about them not having the addicts needs at heart. The couple of people I have been dealing with in the program have been super genuine and as helpful as possible, but they're also not the ones who can GIVE me the drug. And so when it comes down to the person who can, it does seem like that person currently has their head up their ass, and since everyone else at the center is taking this thing super seriously, as they fear their clients could OD at anytime, have a run in with the law; they want to see people like me get the help they need ASAP. It sucks that there is a particular person who is slacking off and that appears to be the person holding the key.

Yeah, I have problems but they've been the same problems I've had for like 2+ years. I still get up every day for work, still do what I have to, but I know now is the time where I have to make the switch. It may come off as counter-intuitive to you, or you may accuse me of not taking it seriously when I say that I'm going to enjoy what time I have left with dope, but that's me just being honest. I'm not an idiot, and I have accepted that my current dope habit is in its twilight. As much as I enjoy using dope, I will have enough will power to take the sub program seriously once I get the green light, but in the meantime I'm going to keep the sickness away by using and I'm going to enjoy the effects of the drug because they kill my depression and anxiety, and I haven't had one single panic attack since I picked up this particular habit. So while dope has it's obvious dark side which most people tend to focus on, there is a reason why millions of people use opiates in general, and they do have beneficial qualities, probably just as many as they do negative ones...

"You don't necessarily have to get into a suboxone "program". Find a psychiatrist that has the proper liscense (any doctor that can preceibe suboxone had to get a special, separate liscense to do so) and begin to see him for therapy and tell him you are an opiate addict and would like to attempt to get clean using cognitive therapy coupled with suboxone maintenance. It will be cheaper and it has been my experience that this avenue tends to be more geared towards the addicts needs and they concentrate on your success, not the money."

Like I said, the program is free through a grant and I have mandatory counselling sessions every Friday and the girl I meet with is a licensed therapist who employs various different methods and approaches for therapy, geared towards overcoming and dealing with addictions. In fact, years ago when she was in school, she had a painkiller and stimulant problem, she did say some of the meds she was on she were legally prescribed, but anyway, she told me how she OD'd a few times and had to be hospitalized, etc. She sounds like she was worse than me, considering I've never had to be hospitalized at all during my dope addiction and I've also never OD'd or come close to OD'ing this entire time (knocks on the nearest piece of wood).

So that's about it, and yeah, I didn't think you were coming off as a dick at all, and I appreciate your response and input. That's what the forum is here for, so it's obviously being put to good use.
 
MemphisX3 said:
Just ask your doctor. If you have been going to him for 18 months and you are pregnant he will most likely give you a script for enough to get you to the next script and verbally repromand you. Seriously, just ask your doctor.



How are you pregnant and on suboxone? I thought that was one of the only reasons they will prescribe subutex and a substitute.the ..
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The problem is my insurance won't cover it until the 12 of every month.
 
man i've got some dope somnambulence going on. ill do a shot then 20 minutes later, wake up falling over the coffee table just in time to catch myself. oh well, that was weird, off to the computer for some forums fuckery! 20 minutes later, same thing with my desk, BAM make a loud noise-hope i didnt wake my roomie and her bf! was i standing there the whole time, or just ran into the desk? who knows! on to the kitchen for some water! 20 minutes later, find myself falling into the brooms in the corner....did i decide to do some late night sweeping? who. the. fuck. knows.
 
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