Alcoholism Discussion Thread Version 6.0

[Cliffy78]

Same thing here as far as drinking with ur gf/bf. I think it's pretty common amongst us boozers. My ex and I used to pound em 24-7, she wasn't a big drinker when we got together, we were very young at the time though, she was in high school so idk if she was headed that way or if my drinking forced her to drink. I feel terrible about it though, like I ruined her life. She went on to be addicted to every drug I did, as well as other drugs I just sold. I'd send her on runs cause I was too cocked to go out and she would pinch the bags and shit, lotta guilt there. But I think my drinking created all that. It seems like whatever I did, she wanted to do me one better, like a competition almost. She finally recovered and had a kid and moved to the other side of the state cause she couldn't resist the triggers/temptations here. Idk I think she drank to deal with me being drunk. Or maybe she would've drank if she never met me idk. I think it's a psychological way of coping maybe idk.

 

[granddeception2]

what's 4 drinks for someone who doesn't have a drink problem?
ppl have a few drinks after work every night.
I don't see the big deal i've quit other stuff

 

[phactor]

what's 4 drinks for someone who doesn't have a drink problem?
ppl have a few drinks after work every night.
I don't see the big deal i've quit other stuff

It all depends on what you are comfortable with (to some extent), I have noticed some people can drink for a month straight and just drop it no problem, I never could. Stopping was always extremely painful, even after I tapered down. 4 drinks for me was often "doing good" and it was a constant struggle to keep it at that. I'd have one and would just start obsessing about the next one and/or the time limit I had set for myself. I also had to try to time it to close to bed time because if I drank them too early I would snap awake at like 4:00 or 5:00 on a good day. Eventually I was just snapping awake no matter how much or how little I drank. It was insane.

So much effort for something that was really fucking up my life. Looking back on it I realize how nuts I was and just how much of a battle it was. I was constantly fighting it and was so tired of it but couldn't stop.

 

[GenericName12]

4 months today, yea fucking lushes.

it's no fun. i really, really wanna drink. it looks so good. i constantly tell myself i can. my quality of life hasn't improved at all since stopping. i miss it. that's them drugs talking, so fuck.

Hey man, sorry to hear this.

As drug addicts we receive our "reward" instantly and get used to the short term reward system. We trick our brain into thinking that just because the "reward" doesn't happen right away means it is never going to happen.

Well that just isn't true. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, even if it takes a while to get there, and the tunnels light seems so very dim. And when you do it will all be worth it. Your brain has forgotten that long term rewards exist, but trust me, they are.

 

[noone1]

what's 4 drinks for someone who doesn't have a drink problem?
ppl have a few drinks after work every night.
I don't see the big deal i've quit other stuff

4 units of alcohol is the recommended max limit of alcohol a day for men (3 for women) But you can't exceed 21 (14 for women) a week. Seems awful low to me.

I think in the bigger boozing countries the limits are much higher. Who knows a lot of it probably has to do more with genetics than anything.

 

[DrinksWithEvil]

Dunno what a unit is

But I. Drinking Bout 550 ml of. Vodka a day now which is better than. 750. From where I was at

 

[granddeception2]

4 units drunk off alc? doesnt sound too good
only a lil bit left in the bottle and i am done

 

[phactor]

Yesterday, I got let off work a little early. I had been working all week (I have two jobs, soon to only be one for many reasons, chief of which is that one of my bosses routinely does not pay me in time and causes tons of stress) and the shop was slow so I asked to leave. This left me with a few hours of free time I did not expect to have.

So, I drive back to my apartment and as soon as I pull into the parking lot I think "A beer would be nice right now". It was pretty brief, I quickly reminded myself that was not a choice I wanted to make. Then I thought about it a bit, for years and years any and all free time would be consumed by drinking and using. Especially "unexpected free time", I would think to myself (great more time to use). This would follow me getting totally wasted and just feeling like shit the next day. It was almost automatic. Like I wouldn't even put a thought into "maybe I should do this".

I got home, meditated, played some video games. I was kinda in a pouty mood but oh well. I was choosing to feel sorry for myself. After an hour or two this went away.

So glad I do not have to do that anymore. Its a huge relief when I think about it.

 

[PriestTheyCalledHim]

...because it's a fucking big and daunting thing to be commiting yourself to.

No matter how much 'one day at a time' you tell yourself there's always going to be a voice saying 'this is going to be hard to keep up for the rest of your life' at the beginning. I don't think there are many people that just suddenly switch and are suddenly absolutely comfortable with total sobriety as a commitment.

It's natural to be scared of the unknown as well, when your whole life has been based around using drugs there are so many questions that naturally rattle your head as to living life sober.

That's why I think it's difficult anyway.

True. It's not always easy or fun either. But the benefits of long term sobriety are worth it, and I personally do not want to go back to using alcohol or other drugs.

 

[Jabberwocky]

I'm unable to drink the large doses that I was able to drink a month or two back even though I'm an almost daily drinker. It seems I drink from 6pm - 9 or 10pm and then crash after drinking 12 beers or so. It used to be almost a case and I would also be able to stay up for much longer. The hangovers if you want to call them that (When you're a daily drinker it doesn't feel like a hangover the next day) seem to be getting a bit worse, am more lethargic, am sleeping more, work is suffering and my mood to do stuff has hit an all time low again.

I keep on trying to stop but then can't handle the withdrawals or missing out on the pointless social crap over the weekends.

All in all I wish I never picked up that first drink as I am now almost 30 and have delayed so many things due to booze. Yet here I am still drinking almost every day.

 

[phactor]

I'm unable to drink the large doses that I was able to drink a month or two back even though I'm an almost daily drinker. It seems I drink from 6pm - 9 or 10pm and then crash after drinking 12 beers or so. It used to be almost a case and I would also be able to stay up for much longer. The hangovers if you want to call them that (When you're a daily drinker it doesn't feel like a hangover the next day) seem to be getting a bit worse, am more lethargic, am sleeping more, work is suffering and my mood to do stuff has hit an all time low again.

I keep on trying to stop but then can't handle the withdrawals or missing out on the pointless social crap over the weekends.

All in all I wish I never picked up that first drink as I am now almost 30 and have delayed so many things due to booze. Yet here I am still drinking almost every day.

Very very similar to my story. I am 31 and have been clean for 68 days. I was able to put together some accomplishments, but they were very much delayed. I am in Grad school now but I have no relationship, live in an apartment (and I can hardily afford it) etc etc. I'd be much better off if I hadn't relapsed after I got out of treatment.

I am not beating myself up over it though (or trying not to). Drinking/using drugs is a non option for me. I could use, but I will amount to nothing AT BEST, I really shouldn't be here considering the dangerous shit I have done.

I often drank a little less then you but it was very very much daily. When I didn't have to drink the next day I would drink all day. Also, the social bullshit looks pretty boring after you get away from it and look back at it clean. Sitting around and drinking over and over again is only tolerable if.. well... you are drinking.

 

[Allein]

Hi all, this is my first post over here having just been gifted SL mod team membership alongside my current TDS duties.

I may have posted in this in this thread in the past but it's long enough ago that I can't remember, I've not posted of late because I manage to stop drinking around 3 years ago now and never could find words of support that I felt comfortable with.

I under estimated the dangers of alcohol dependency having never been much of a drinker right up to about 30, life changes and various things led me to start drinking more regularly and it was no time at all until I was drinking a bottle of whiskey everyday and ten developed a nasty benzo habit on top.

At the time I was quite depressed and wanted to get on a CBT program and to do so I had to get my drinking under control, which for me is stopping, the idea I could ever go back to 'normal' drinking is ridiculous although I accept YMMV.

At the time in the UK (may well be the same) you could get on a Librium program but since the last thing I need was more Benzos so I worked put a benzo taper and a day when I would basically CT the booze, It worked I relapsed on benzos a couple of times but never for long.

It was only after stopping I realised how much this stuff was messing me up, the stomach pain and general problems with my digestive system ( you all know what I'm talking about, it's early here and detail isnt required) but it was also making my depression, specifically my self loathing so much worse.

It's a tough one to kick but I'm so glad I did, I've still got my problems but they donlt include daily abuse and constant pain and discomfort as well a a craving for more of the same poison

All my and best wishes to those struggling with this beast

 

[polymath]

31 days sober. My longest period without a drink in at least 10 years... I got home from rehab yesterday morning, and I'm feeling a lot better than a month ago. I got "hooked" on excercise during the treatment and have been going to the gym five times a week. I already notice that I can do more sit-ups and lift larger weights that 3 weeks ago. Today I'm starting to attend AA meetings, I already tried that 3 years ago but wasn't motivated enough back then.

 

[phactor]

31 days sober. My longest period without a drink in at least 10 years... I got home from rehab yesterday morning, and I'm feeling a lot better than a month ago. I got "hooked" on excercise during the treatment and have been going to the gym five times a week. I already notice that I can do more sit-ups and lift larger weights that 3 weeks ago. Today I'm starting to attend AA meetings, I already tried that 3 years ago but wasn't motivated enough back then.

My suggestion would be to continue setting up and improving on a healthy routine. I needed to include NA meetings daily as well as exercise. Everyone is different. Just keep doing the next right thing.

 

[phactor]

Hey everyone, I have 74 days today. I am up in Alaska and have done many things clean that I would have never done while using. Don't get me wrong, I have had moments of "a beer would be nice" but beyond that I haven't really had much to deal with in the way of cravings. I'd like to share a photo I took on a trip yesterday, I can guarantee you I would have not done this in active addiction (or at the very least I would have been drinking at the bar in the boat).

 

[tremours]

i dont think i could ever make it 74 days, the longest i ever made it was 30 or so, but that was with smoking weed everyday, all day long

 

[hydroazuanacaine]

30 days is a shitload of days not to drink. 74 is like 5x as many. sucks when days get harder when you'd have thought easier.

thanks, GenericName12. yeah, i was almost expecting a few weeks of rough and then to come out with all this motivation and happiness. silly me. i do think i might be starting to see some physical and mental benefit as of late. i have no idea. if i'm this unstable without alcohol, i can't believe i ever drank. i guess. i have no idea what would happen if i got drunk. i used to get drunk lots of times.

congrats, Allien. the benzo plus alcohol punch is a bitch.

dude, i fucking love doc in Mad Men. his character is starting to develop. i'd have totally drank that scotch. maybe. "tomato juice if you have it."

 

[GenericName12]

thanks, GenericName12. yeah, i was almost expecting a few weeks of rough and then to come out with all this motivation and happiness. silly me. i do think i might be starting to see some physical and mental benefit as of late. i have no idea. if i'm this unstable without alcohol, i can't believe i ever drank. i guess. i have no idea what would happen if i got drunk. i used to get drunk lots of times.

It takes time, but it will happen. I'm coming up on 11 months. Just the other day I was thinking about all of the good things that happened to me that wouldn't have happened if I had kept drinking. Most of those happened relatively recently. Then I think about where I would be right now if I had kept drinking, and it makes me so happy to have gotten out when I did. I didn't have this perspective 6 months ago.

Also mental health wise, I'm way better than I was after 4 months. But even now, life is never perfect. Nobody expects it to be perfect. Overall, am I happy? Yes. Am I happy 24/7? Not even close. Was I happy a year ago? No, never.

When you first get sober the world is new and exciting again. Then after about a month the boredom kicks in. Keep pushing through though, and finding new ways to alleviate this boredom and these new weird emotions you are feeling again. I try to think about everything that makes me want to drink, and what caused it, and how I can avoid it. Moping around my apartment alone on the weekends tends to make me want to drink, so I try to avoid that as much as possible. Obviously easier said than done, especially when the depression kicks in and makes it hard to get out of bed.

Kinda got off topic. Woops. I do that sometimes.. haha. Anyway, keep it up. You'll make it through, I'm optimistic. Feel free to PM me if you ever want to chat privately.

 

[PriestTheyCalledHim]

i dont think i could ever make it 74 days, the longest i ever made it was 30 or so, but that was with smoking weed everyday, all day long

Smoking herb is the problem. A LOT of addicts both to alcohol and other drugs do this and it just winds up becoming a substitute addiction for us, and then we relapse on alcohol or our drug(s) of choice we have an addiction to. Plus if you do not use the drug(s) you are addicted to yet use cannabis, you are not sober or clean at all.

Can you check into an in-patient detox/rehab?

 

[phactor]

In my case, smoking herb would inevitably make me want to drink a little bit (after I got bored of herb, when I first started smoking after a break I would be excited but that would fade) which would then lead to other shit. Thats just me though.