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You might be a junkie if.....(version 2)

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If you regularly overdraft your bank account multiple times a week

And know the limit it will let you overdraft

And how to beat getting charged overdraft fees

When I was younger... If your parents give you 'haircut money' every week and you haven't gotten one in months

If the people in pawn shops are on a first name basis with you
 
If your local pharmacist grabs you're preferred size of insuline syringe before you get to the counter.
If every spoon in your house is burned on the bottom.
If you cry and bleed every time you take a shit
 
(Happened 10 years ago) If your brothers friend calls you up & says everything must go sale at his house, come on over...........get there & the tv, computer, waterbed, furniture & car all priced to go the same day. This kid was a chef at a restaurant until he hooked up with a girl that abused heroin & thats all she wrote.
 
So many people will buy razor blades in the pub cos they are so fucking expensive for the Gillette blades.
They are the most shoplifted item in the UK.
Cheese and meat also easy to sell cos everyone after a bargain.
I've known junkies to even sell dogs in the pub.
If you've ever hit rock bottom its amazing the things you can sell for some quick cash.

I was thinking of straight razor blades, rather than shaving razors.

I actually might buy shaving razors off someone in a bar, at a good price.

Still cheese though...
 
Yeah I'm thinking about shutting the overdraft on my bank account..... I can go over 300 dollars but will have to pay a 30 dollar fee plus the money I went over.... Seems like a bad idea. I'm not in junkie mode at the moment but doesn't mean it won't happen again :\
 
Whenever you eat you get a big greasy fast food burger because you need the calories

You've found an old tooter that you or someone else used to smoke dope, swished water around in it until dope dissolved in the water, and then shot that water

A pharmacist has ever told you they're calling the cops

You told the pharmacist that it was the law that they had to sell you needles

You owe your dealer 200 dollars and still ask for a front

Someone asks you how you spend 600 dollars in four days you say "umm... cigarettes, gas, food, and i dunno, stuff" knowing damn well you spent at least 500 of it on dope

You eat one meal a day if you don't count candy

You started drinking soda strictly for it's caloric content

You've found something that looks like dope and smoked it only to find out it wasn't dope

If you wear shorts in the middle of winter and you're not cold

If you wear long sleves in the middle of summer

If you dress comfortably when you're going to cop because you know if you get arrested at least you'll be able to sleep in the loop

If you have a broken tail light but can't spent the 15 bucks to get it fixed because every time you have money you spend it on dope

If withdrawal is the only reason you care about getting arrested

You get one dealer to front you and then move on to the next dealer until you need a front from them, rinse, repeat

The only time you pay back a front is when you're in debt to all your dealers

You paid back the front to the dealer with the best dope.

The autocorrect in your phone knows "heroin" "oxycontin" "oxy" "roxy" etc.
 
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You know you are a junkie if you keep foil in your bedroom. You have a special little bag that contains everything you need to cook up a hit.
You can't wait to get home to have a hit after scoring so you find the nearest public toilet to use.
You have ever sold a £200 phone for £30.
 
if when you take a shit you have to wipe your tears instead of your ass

Lmao, nice one.

.. If one day you're using amps at work, then the next day (over)using your pain meds/anti anxiety meds to combat the comedown/anxiety
 
You've got $200 in your pocket, a 20 minute drive each way to your dudes house...

....& you've got less than an 1/8th of a tank of gas. But you don't use any of the money you have, cause you might be able to get an extra point or two with that extra $20. and you KNOW there's a good chance that you might possibly run out of gas on the way home.
 
You and your friends are going to dress up like they're homeless and hold cups out for people to give you money. (Lol doing this next month when we go to washington d.c. for a rave).
 
If it smells like dope when you take a piss, and also you think about all the drugs you are releasing from your body when doing this.
 
When you hide your drugs while high on opes/benzos and the next day have no fucking clue where they are.

Fml.

edit: yay, only took me all day today to find it. *sigh*
 
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You might be a junkie if you randomly check your arms for a vein and think to yourself that will be a good one next time.
 
You might be a junkie if "you have horrible IV technique" is a normal sentence that comes out of your mouth (the kid really does have horrible technique though. He's only been banging for a couple of weeks and it looks like he's been on a year long run).
 
Drug testing experiences are yours and yours only. Doesnt mean it will be the same as any others.

anyways.

You inject the stuff inside a glow-stick just to see what will happen. (true story, friend did it, nothing happened. got lucky)

You spend your nights trying to make all the crumbs and cigarette ashes on your coffee table, then get pissed when it doesn't double back (for meh meth shootin' BLers.

Your ears perk up when you hear normal people talk about shots only to realize they're talking about liquor.

You give elaborate explanations, of mainline, lateral, and rollers.

You know how to sharpen your points.

(probably not funny, but eh. the rest of this thread is hilarious. especially since there aren't many places on BL that will tolerate making light of your intravenous drug use)

Also the razor thing. I stayed high for like a month stealing razors, and other hygiene products. Walkin' up to people in the ghetto and asking if they wanted to buy some makeup for their daughter.
 
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