You Are Not

[bluegirl]

Yesterday,
In a cranky mood,
I waited
For you to call
And when you did
I waited - to hear
About your day and
All the things you did
But all I heard
Was my own voice
The only voice
I ever seem to hear
And I wanted to lie
My head in my arms
Or kick the wall and
Overturn some furniture
You see, sometimes
All I want
Is all you
Do not give
I am the noisy one
In this relationship
Never-ending stream
Of stories and words;
Silences and
Brooding eyes
These are the things
That belong to you
And for the most part
This is what I want
I’ll trade mood swings and
Top of your lungs loudness
For someone who knows
My favourite cartoon
How I have my coffee
And exactly how to hold me
But just sometimes
All I want
Is everything
You are not
---------------------------------
this poem came to me yesterday while i was walking home from the train station in the rain - i was feeling kinda cranky from a massive blood sugar drop. i had also just had a phone call with my boyfriend who was kinda fucking me around - all good now tho, he came over and we watched futurama!! this poem is also a kind of response to dagny's reply to this poem by e-girl

 

[plazma]

Regardless of the inspiration, this is a fucking lovely piece of work.
-plaz out-