Trebuchette
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2012
- Messages
- 23
New thread because I have a few special circumstances. (1) I'm ill right now. Superbug-ill, ill. That came from the reason for my anxiety: over-active thyroid. Took docs several years to find, and I was trying to "go natural" with the cure. (Hard to do when you're on benzos, smoke, etc.) But I tried hard, and my levels were getting better, in October, but then I got a tooth infection, and really sick from antibiotics (ER several times for re-hydration; then I had superbug without knowing it for a while, and by the time I saw doctor, it was pretty bad). (Edit: see other thread: I was major confused, didn't know I had bug, tried to hide X use.) Family freaked week before Christmas as I went (am going) through treatment. Lots of stress and pain. Lots of vomiting. Xanax really helped (does it all!), but...
(2) truthfully, my worst moments were "I'm out of benzos early." I didn't lie about it: I had taken more than I should. Well, doc said to do so, because I was throwing up a lot, and he had me putting benzos where sun doesn't shine (anal!), extras to account for not getting other drugs that keep heart rate down. They helped, but whereas I'd been on 3mg/day give-or-take, I ran through 100 in 2 weeks (during this treatment for superbug, where I'd also been on opiates for pain, other stuff for nausea). (Well, don't count em all against me, since edit: within last few weeks, as dry-heaving and dehydrated, so there was very little that stayed down. Even with back-end trick, superbug apparently equals diarrhea. So I have no idea how much was "ingested". This is why I was IVed some stuff — I was sick.) (If It's not clear, 5 ER trips in last few months. So embarrassing, though some for pain/dehydration/confusion. It was just pure suck.)
But I said, more than once, "This is a problem." Because the stress of seeing pills disappear: DAMN! The docs haven't really seen benzo was problem (edit: compared to superbug; let me stress they think I may have life-threatening illness), but yesterday agreed to switch me to 3mg/day Ks because I wanted longer-acting (so I could eventually wean off this isht). Doc won't give me Valium (NO idea why), but anything else goes, so K it was (I'd heard it was 2nd longest-acting).
Got Ks today, took one, slept like baby this morning for good 4 hours. (I hadn't slept in 24 hrs though). Questions:
1. How long does it take this shit to kick in?! DANG! Yes, I was on Ativan 5-6 yrs, then Xanax last 2 yrs almost (varying doses, usually 2-4mg/day of either), so fast-acting is what I'm used to. I opted to break these in half after pill #1, took half, and I waited, and waited... WTF?! Nothing! Panic set in, so I took other half, then other half... yep. Day 1, I'm already at 4mg (though I'm headed to bed after this, I hope). I feel like I'm sleepy, but having some w/d symptoms? (I think?! Cold hands, not "relaxed" like with Xanax.)
2. Tell me this gets better, like it builds up or something. I can wait the time for it to kick in, I guess, but I'd like to feel a little more relief than I do an hour after taking the things! I'd heard they were "equal" to xanax?? Big oops?
3. Can I divide them? They're not scored, so I'm wondering if the halves might be all filler in one half. Should I take a whole, thinking, "Maybe it'll kick in tomorrow!" and just go on a schedule?
Yeah my hope is a taper after my thyroid is squared away; it would be nice to get down to 0.5mg/day benzo. Then I'll be able to argue with doc for 5mg Valium. (He does NOT get that 10mg Valium = 1mg other benzos. But if I could get down that low, I could possibly get this monkey off my back.)
I love benzos and all (if you need em, you need em. Nothing like em.) But I'm getting over the love now. I'd like no more emergency visits begging for a pill that would cost me $0.10 pill and paying $200 for the "privilege." I've hit some lows, and that crap has just got to end. I'd hoped for a "controlled addiction" years ago, but since I've been sick, I don't feel any control. With Ks, I'm not feeling much of anything
So any tips for this Xanax --> Klonipin switch would be a help. Thanks!
(2) truthfully, my worst moments were "I'm out of benzos early." I didn't lie about it: I had taken more than I should. Well, doc said to do so, because I was throwing up a lot, and he had me putting benzos where sun doesn't shine (anal!), extras to account for not getting other drugs that keep heart rate down. They helped, but whereas I'd been on 3mg/day give-or-take, I ran through 100 in 2 weeks (during this treatment for superbug, where I'd also been on opiates for pain, other stuff for nausea). (Well, don't count em all against me, since edit: within last few weeks, as dry-heaving and dehydrated, so there was very little that stayed down. Even with back-end trick, superbug apparently equals diarrhea. So I have no idea how much was "ingested". This is why I was IVed some stuff — I was sick.) (If It's not clear, 5 ER trips in last few months. So embarrassing, though some for pain/dehydration/confusion. It was just pure suck.)
But I said, more than once, "This is a problem." Because the stress of seeing pills disappear: DAMN! The docs haven't really seen benzo was problem (edit: compared to superbug; let me stress they think I may have life-threatening illness), but yesterday agreed to switch me to 3mg/day Ks because I wanted longer-acting (so I could eventually wean off this isht). Doc won't give me Valium (NO idea why), but anything else goes, so K it was (I'd heard it was 2nd longest-acting).
Got Ks today, took one, slept like baby this morning for good 4 hours. (I hadn't slept in 24 hrs though). Questions:
1. How long does it take this shit to kick in?! DANG! Yes, I was on Ativan 5-6 yrs, then Xanax last 2 yrs almost (varying doses, usually 2-4mg/day of either), so fast-acting is what I'm used to. I opted to break these in half after pill #1, took half, and I waited, and waited... WTF?! Nothing! Panic set in, so I took other half, then other half... yep. Day 1, I'm already at 4mg (though I'm headed to bed after this, I hope). I feel like I'm sleepy, but having some w/d symptoms? (I think?! Cold hands, not "relaxed" like with Xanax.)
2. Tell me this gets better, like it builds up or something. I can wait the time for it to kick in, I guess, but I'd like to feel a little more relief than I do an hour after taking the things! I'd heard they were "equal" to xanax?? Big oops?

3. Can I divide them? They're not scored, so I'm wondering if the halves might be all filler in one half. Should I take a whole, thinking, "Maybe it'll kick in tomorrow!" and just go on a schedule?
Yeah my hope is a taper after my thyroid is squared away; it would be nice to get down to 0.5mg/day benzo. Then I'll be able to argue with doc for 5mg Valium. (He does NOT get that 10mg Valium = 1mg other benzos. But if I could get down that low, I could possibly get this monkey off my back.)
I love benzos and all (if you need em, you need em. Nothing like em.) But I'm getting over the love now. I'd like no more emergency visits begging for a pill that would cost me $0.10 pill and paying $200 for the "privilege." I've hit some lows, and that crap has just got to end. I'd hoped for a "controlled addiction" years ago, but since I've been sick, I don't feel any control. With Ks, I'm not feeling much of anything

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