• MDMA &
    Empathogenic
    Drugs

    Welcome Guest!
  • MDMA Moderators: Esperighanto

Will the anxiety/insomnia ever end? When will I be normal...

I suggest you stop reading about symptoms of other persons and stop trying to guess that you have a problem. I had this kind of anxiety and I saw it on other friends many times in my life, even creating psicosis-like reactions. At the moment you stop trying to "over-look" your symptoms, you will feel better: just as soon as you start stopping thinking about this :-)

If you continue having troubles with insomnia, go to the doctor and get some diazepams/lorazepams. Lorazepam 1mg once per day (on the night) really helps for this kind of scenarios.

Also remember that bad sleeping epochs are DIRECTLY related with stress, so you are in a kind of "loop" with a very easy exit: just convince yourself that everything is ok :-)

Otherwise you will become an hypochondriac, and believe me, is not good for yourself. I know it`s not easy to go out of this, but, I was something like 1 year like you and as soon as you get convinced, in 1-2 weeks you are fine. JUST take attention when you feel really serious symptoms (pain for example), and NEVER give attention to symptoms that can be there for every individual.

Anxiety can create a LOT of your symptoms, and I honestly think is the only one reason that creates this kind of feeling on you. Anxiety can create tachicardia, pains, nervous tics, insomnia...

A small treatment with soft benzo`s strictly controlled by a doctor will help you and will make the symptoms to completely disappear as soon you start the treatment process.. if you feel that you can`t control this by yourself just start the treatment... and don`t be scared of doing it. Mechanism/pharmacology of benzo`s are really simple and similar to Alcohol, and used as a tool, will never be a risk for your health.

Peace and love! :-) and I/we are here to help you when you need it!

PS: You can also try before with controlled experiences with alcohol (AND CONTROL! don`t become an alcoholic!) and you will see, at least, how your symptoms cease during your alcohol experiences. At least that will demonstrate to yourself that everything is created by yourself :) - this helped me a lot. NEVER mix benzo`s with alcohol eh?
 
hokkk I'm not too sure which post you've read (but do read the latest one that I posted about half an hour ago saying I'm doing better)
I was literally just asking about brain zaps as I wasnt sure what they are/if i was having them - and said I was doing better than I was a couple of weeks ago...just updating this thread in case other people come along looking for advice :)
 
I honestly think (again :P) that all symptoms are coming from anxiety, I am very identified with the symptoms you are currently describing, and they are all related to anxiety.

Brain zaps does not have anything to do with feeling strange things on the hands. It`s more related to feel like an electric shock in the brain zone for a very short period of time (less than 2,3 secs), with consecutive distraction and feeling of "interruption of everything" for just one second, it`s not something "continuous".
 
Statistically, I never saw brain zaps for one single dosage of 250mg of identified MDMA, and I saw a lot of anxiety/panic attacks/psicosis while exceeding the 2mg/kg dosage-rule. I just saw brain zaps for recurring over-dosage of multiple stimulants for a very significative period of time (people loosing completely the control for weeks with a lot of different substances). :)
 
ah okok - yes that makes sense since I havnt had any 'zaps' per se - just waiting for the anxiety to fade away, which it slowly is... exercise is indeed helping, hopefully enough in time for NYE :D huzzaah (no OD-ing this time -.- )
 
Just don`t worry, my friend. If you don`t worry and try to just focus on the life itself, it will go away. It happened with myself, and with a lot of people I know. Before you try a benzo's treatment, when you detect symptoms, try to take 1-2 beers in a short period of time and you will see how it goes away before you finish the first one. But remember to use this just to demonstrate to yourself for once that everything is created due anxiety.

I hope you will have a good entrance in the new year! Greetings from Spain ;-)
 
Hello everyone, happy new year! Wishing you all a successful year of rolling...

Just another update really, its been almost three months since all this began and all my symptoms are still present apart from anxiety (the only anxiety I have is worrying about if this will go). I have also had some major headaches in the past few days which havnt been there for weeks. I've started to think I've damaged my serotonin system... I know it doesn't sound possible from my drug history etc, but why has there been no let up in symptoms, the only thing that helps is exercise but even that is internment...any ideas? Is this just paranoia?

Thanks!
 
Most likely, it's all in your head friend....


Many people have been in the same place as you, and most agree, you won't get better till you tell yourself that you are! Anxiety and depression are really all in your head, and unless you have a long history of mental disorders there is really no reason why your "ecstasy" use could cause lasting changes to your brain chemistry that will last for the rest of your life.

The aftermath of MDMA abuse can be scary, but is likely in no way permanent. Your brain is constantly adapting, and will adapt to these changes as well :)




Right now it's likely your making this much worse on yourself. Just relax my friend... time heals all wounds. You WILL get better, but you have to decide that you are GOING to get better first ;)
 
I am aware that I will get better eventually (and I've certainly decided on that - I've even had some normal moments taking just multi vitamins!)
but I never dreamed that it would take this long... as i said I'm not really that anxious or depressed anymore, I have most of my personality back especially when im with friends, where as two months ago I couldn't leave the house...its just that I'm not seeing any of the symptoms clear up, and if anything the extra strong headaches are new
 
The "headaches" may actually be your brain repairing itself, as can be the case with "brain-zaps".


Honestly you don't sound so bad at all to me haha... that's a pretty normal, if not faster than normal, timeline for recovery. One month is when things even start to get better, at 2 months people are usually able to live rather normally but still deal with the symptoms, at 3 months is probably when the most progress towards becoming normal is made but it's not until 6 months out that most people really feel they are their old selves again. That's a rather large overgeneralization of many testimonies from people who went through things similar as yourself, but seems to be the norm. Some really heavy abuses can take much, much longer to even reach half of their old potential however :\



It took me about 8 months before I was ready to try MDMA again, and even then I had to keep my use EXTREMELY limited. Now it's a good year and a half, nearing two years, since my heavy abuse and I am for sure better... WAY BETTER, but I still can tell I am not 100% of what I used to be.. that I can tell for sure. It gets better though, at the least, you learn to live with it hahaha
 
I wouldnt say I'm a heavy user...it was only my first time, I just over did it - I guess it was about 230mg powder

As long as the major symptoms go and I can think clearly again without this constant rubbish dwelling on my mind I'm sure I wont even notice a difference...I just want to be able to forget about this hell basically.

In fact today when I took my multivitamins (I hadnt taken them for a few days) I felt my mind go more or less clear for about an hour - and these were just standard Centrum Advanced vitamins, so nothing too special.
 
Strangedesign...its not that im a perfectionist, Im one of the most chilled people I know but yes being part of a strict family does add to the stress.
And its probably even more to the fact that this was my FIRST TIME - its not like I've been popping pills for years, I dont even smoke! I just felt that it was a little unfair..however yes you live and learn and now I'm just trying my best to get better.
 
TheShowMustGoOn said:
I wouldnt say I'm a heavy user...it was only my first time, I just over did it - I guess it was about 230mg powder

As long as the major symptoms go and I can think clearly again without this constant rubbish dwelling on my mind I'm sure I wont even notice a difference...I just want to be able to forget about this hell basically.

In fact today when I took my multivitamins (I hadnt taken them for a few days) I felt my mind go more or less clear for about an hour - and these were just standard Centrum Advanced vitamins, so nothing too special.
Click to expand...

Sounds like a complete placebo effect to be honest. I'm thinking the rest of your symptoms are probably just in your head :\



Multi-vitamins are pretty shitty. They overload our body with a lot of things it DOESN'T need, just to get a few of the things that it does. Puts your kidneys under a lot of stress as well. Just eat a healthy diet, one high in L-Tryptophan. Our old moderator here DarksidedSam has a great diet that will help speed serotonin production up, that plus sunshine and exercise will be WAY better than any pill you could ever take.
 
It could have been a placebo only Iwasn't thinking about the vitamins when I took them, kinda took then just out of habit and was not expecting a difference...
Living in London it is pretty difficult to get sunshine here...
And I've been exercising every day 15-30 mins (working 9-6 on 5 hours sleep doesn't leave you withmuch energy)
Is the diet on one of his past threads?
Thanks for the help btw I seriously appreciate it!
 
@strangedesign - I appreciate your thoughts, I was doing very well mentally over the past month or so, not getting too stressed about anything and just going with the flow. The only thing that has worried me now is that it has been three months and the only improvement I see is when I exercise otherwise everything comes flooding back. But I'm just trying to get on with it now...

@folley - I'm not intentionally not sleeping, I can fall asleep quite easily but wake up after 4 or 5 hours. Maybe once a week I will sleep 6-8 hours. Will the melatonin actually work? Ive tried a bunch of herbal pills that have all seemed useless. Again with the sunlight, unfortunately I work in what is essentially a warehouse with computers, I love my job, but we have no windows. It gets dark by about 4pm and finish work at 6 - so I basically try and spend what I can of my lunch hour outside :/
And I will defo look into that diet - thank you again!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top