• The Dark Side 💕 Welcome Guest 💕
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    Notable Threads Urgent Hotlines
    Bereavement Mindfulness
    Suicide Support Anger Management
  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

Social Why do we sometimes hide our struggles from the people closest to us?

inlilisimage

inlilisimage

Greenlighter
Joined
Dec 14, 2024
Messages
28
Location
California, USA
It can feel easier to tell a stranger that we're having a difficult time than to admit it to someone we love. Is it fear of worrying them, shame, not wanting to be a burden, or something else?

What helps make honest conversations feel safer?
 
Good question. I think it could be several reasons.

Not wanting to seem weak, not wanting to be depressing, not wanting them to worry. Also it’s possible the person closest to us isn’t always sympathetic, or that they aren’t a good listener.

I’m sure there are more reasons though.
 
Good question, maybe we don’t want burden people close to us? There is also something to what @Chaurus said, not wanting to show weakness, to have something over you that might be used against you.
In many ways hiding our pain is not healthy and eventually will com out sooner or later. I prefer a controlled exit of my baggage rather than imploding or exploding in public for all to see.
 
Like said earlier we don't want them to have additional power over us. If someone close discover some of your shady undertakings or habits by one's own admission or by their own device stepping over the line due to suspicions (doesn't make any difference really), you sure as hell is never going to hear the end of it. I know this by experience, shit from 10 years ago can and will resurface if they feel a certain way about something, or they want to influence you somehow or make you feel a certain way lol. Luckily I'm fully aware that no matter what bringing up my eccentricities and former eccentricities make them hell of a lot more uncomfortable than me, I have more expererience with these things in this regard, first hand experience one could say even, so it's kind of hard to gain any leverage on me by doing this.
 
I really miss my eating disorder forum for the reason, though sometimes I felt like my personal stories might be triggering so deleted them. I can't say much now...about anything that bothers me. I don't feel like it. Sharing is good ...though
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top