Craya came home at 6 instead of 4 because she was buying clothes for her son. She would be so much better off to spend the time with the toddler instead of spending the time shopping for him. She always says she doesn't have any money, but she buys things anyway. When she came in late, her attention was diverted by a phone call from Zed, her husband, who happened to call just as she entered the house.
Craya spends every waking moment thinking about that husband of hers. I mean, ok, he is nice looking. I will give her that. But he's an alcoholic. He comes from a family of really dumb people. Genuine stupidity. And they all think they are amazingly smart. Not one of them even has the humility to allow for the notion that perhaps they might be wrong about something. I can't stand them.
Craya is a loving and sweet mother. But she is totally blind to the world at large. Her mind is on Zed. They have been married 8 years and she fucking spies on him. WOW. wow. I listen to the denizens of the Al-Anon rooms. In many cases, people who marry alcoholics have special needs. Sometimes, they have other issues that are just as serious and often twice as deadly because they don't understand the concept of getting help for themselves. My mother is the alcoholic in my parents' marriage. My grandfather was the alcoholic in my grandparents' marriage. My sister is the alcoholic in her marriage. In my family, the sober partners all have heavy mental health issues. (For my purposes here, I am ignoring the argument that being married to an alcoholic makes the other spouse crazy.)
Craya sees that Zed is an alcoholic. She understands where he came from. Craya does not see her own issues. I don't think she regards spying on her husband as strange. Maybe I'm just old. I don't know any other 30 year young mothers. Perhaps the entire generation of people coming behind me will not have any secrets by the time they are my age. All of their days, each of their moments, all captured in 3D and in multimedia. Perhaps Craya is normal, and not completely obsessed to distraction and quasi insane about that fucking Zed. (Christ, it's a man. Like there's not about a zillion other piece of shit men, right?)
I guess I wrote all that to write this: If, in a few years, everyone spies on everyone, and it's acceptable? Then thank you God for shadows and fog and the privacy I have enjoyed these 54 years. Thank you for the mystery. Help us to stay focused on our own individual paths; help us to allow for and respect that which we do not know.
Craya spends every waking moment thinking about that husband of hers. I mean, ok, he is nice looking. I will give her that. But he's an alcoholic. He comes from a family of really dumb people. Genuine stupidity. And they all think they are amazingly smart. Not one of them even has the humility to allow for the notion that perhaps they might be wrong about something. I can't stand them.
Craya is a loving and sweet mother. But she is totally blind to the world at large. Her mind is on Zed. They have been married 8 years and she fucking spies on him. WOW. wow. I listen to the denizens of the Al-Anon rooms. In many cases, people who marry alcoholics have special needs. Sometimes, they have other issues that are just as serious and often twice as deadly because they don't understand the concept of getting help for themselves. My mother is the alcoholic in my parents' marriage. My grandfather was the alcoholic in my grandparents' marriage. My sister is the alcoholic in her marriage. In my family, the sober partners all have heavy mental health issues. (For my purposes here, I am ignoring the argument that being married to an alcoholic makes the other spouse crazy.)
Craya sees that Zed is an alcoholic. She understands where he came from. Craya does not see her own issues. I don't think she regards spying on her husband as strange. Maybe I'm just old. I don't know any other 30 year young mothers. Perhaps the entire generation of people coming behind me will not have any secrets by the time they are my age. All of their days, each of their moments, all captured in 3D and in multimedia. Perhaps Craya is normal, and not completely obsessed to distraction and quasi insane about that fucking Zed. (Christ, it's a man. Like there's not about a zillion other piece of shit men, right?)
I guess I wrote all that to write this: If, in a few years, everyone spies on everyone, and it's acceptable? Then thank you God for shadows and fog and the privacy I have enjoyed these 54 years. Thank you for the mystery. Help us to stay focused on our own individual paths; help us to allow for and respect that which we do not know.