doofqueen said:
Theres alot of people saying that if they had children would 100% give up drugs...im not too sure they would as its all quite hypothetical...or maybe they would and i really am irresponsible ![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
*sigh*
i didnt even get into the 'drug scene' till about a year or two ago, i didn't. I've only started taking xtc in the last year and i have an 8 yr old son....it's never in the house...i never pill when he's around...i never have a come down when he's around and its an occasional thing i do some weekends when he is spending time with his father.
It's my little release... i go out to dance...spend some time with friends and get off my chops 8)
I wonder how all of you that said you would give up pills once you had a family would feel the same about alcohol....would you take your kids to a party where they were serving it? would you still drink alcohol on a night out while u had a night to yourselves and your kids are getting babysat? It's still fucking you up....as socially acceptable as it is...then again your answers are still only going to be 'hypothetical' yeah? *shrugs*
I suppose the above paragraph also ties in with 'alchohol is evil thread'
I've been getting heaps paranoid about the fact that i am a mother and i do drugs esp from my BL parents thread when the only parents that replied saidthey dont do drugs at all so i feel a little alone in the matter but i have thought it over and i've decided that i know what im doing and thats that 
and i suppose that should have gone in my bl parents thread but it all ties into this one post seeing as everyone is talking about having kids and stopping all drug use
I had my son when i was 16 yrs old...i was a baby...i'm still growing up and only starting to have a decent social life now (and no i dont mean its decent just cos drugs are involved) so i'm only just starting to live life now...I'm 25 and i have an 8 yr old...whats a girl to do aye? (if u think the answer is simple think again and just TRY and picture yoursel in my shoes)
Okay, I haven't actually
had my child yet, so I may come back in a couple of months and tell you otherwise, but!
Yes, I am 100% giving up drugs. Whether or not my fiance does is not up to me, and he still has a few beers every now and then and that doesn't bother me because he's responsible and it's his choice. I quit smoking and drinking to lead a healthier (although with more icecream) lifestyle for baby and that's the way I plan to keep it. I mean, not only do I feel better about making what I think are the right choices for my kid, but I feel healthier and happier anyway.
That's not to say that anyone who is a parent and takes drugs is a bad person or a bad parent. It's obviously a personal choice and if you (or whoever) feels like that's the way you want to live your life and you're not affecting your child, then that's your decision and yours alone. The only things about it that bother me are (this is a hypothetical "you", I'm not talking about anyone in particular):
1. The chance that you could fuck yourself up and then not be able to be there for your child. I mean, as most people on this board are aware there's always a risk when doing any kind of drug. It's too big a risk for me to take when I have a small person who can't care for themselves, personally.
2. The child somehow finds out what's going on and uses this as part of you being a "role model". I know they probably won't find out and most parents don't do any recreational drugs around their child, but it bothers me that it could make the child think it was the "right thing to do", maybe. In the way that kids who have parents who smoke are more likely to smoke, and so on. Parents are a huge influence in a child's life, I'm not sure if this is the influence I'd be wanting to make.
In response to the specific questions about alcohol, no, for the time being I wouldn't take my child to a party where they were serving alcohol. I'm always reminded of my little brother, when he was 10, at a New Years party with my parents drunk off his nut because the adults were all too pissed to actually watch what the kids were doing.
The "alcohol on a night out" question - I guess it depends. If it was a special occasion like an anniversary or a birthday, a nice glass of wine would be suitable, I think. I mean, it's hard to just take 1/16 of a pill because you want to "complement your meal", yanno? I don't even know if that makes sense. I wouldn't drink alcohol for the sake of drinking alcohol on a night out, no. I certainly wouldn't come home to the babysitter tanked and passing out and puking on the carpet.
Like I said, though, it's a personal choice. Being a teenage parent can't be easy and you must have missed out on a lot of the "teenage" stuff. If you feel like you're doing the right thing then that's really all that matters. No one can tell you whether or not it makes you a "bad parent". I say kudos to you for being brave enough to admit that you were feeling shitty about it.
like i said i've just been paranoid about it becasue everyone said they would totally give it up and i started way after he was already born and only one person actually admitted to it in the BL parents thread (so was questioning it) but yep i know i'm doing a good job because all i need to do is look at the person he has become at the tender age of eight and know i've raised a gorgeous little spirit *proud* I cant wait to see what sort of person he will be at eighteen 
