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What does he WANT FROM MMEEE???

MedicalCoding

MedicalCoding

Greenlighter
Joined
Apr 29, 2014
Messages
47
Location
School
So two years ago, I met this guy named Louie. I always seen him around town one a month, and I considered him a friend. I would always run into him at the store, when I was leaving work, or when I was on my workout power walk.




I ran into him once a month for about six months, and he seemed friendly. Mostly talking about his job. In the summer of 2014, I invited him to my house for lunch and he had an XX rated conversation with me. I invited him to my house for lunch when I ran into him on my power walk, and he said "You do NOT need to work out!!! You are NOT fat!!!! You have an amazing body!!! Every time I see your huge ass and your huge boobs, I just want to burst and Im sure your P~~~~~~is amazing!!!!!"" That was the last contact Ive ever had with him , and he recently started contacting me even though its been at least a year!!! Last month, he called my phone and would leave messages every night. Then he would call and ask to hang out, and I was always too busy. The next night , I got a text from Louie saying "Im in the Park playing Ball. Want to play???" and I did not respond. Now I keep seeing Louie when I get off Work.
 
Why did you not respond to his messages after he got back in contact? What is the nature of the calls and messages? If they are friendly he may want to hang out - if they are sexual then he wants sex.

Are you interested in him sexually? Has his behavior towards you started to get a bit predatory / stalker like ?

I think you need to make your intentions on the matter clear
 
The only right thing to do is go play ball with him and just fucking destroy him and make him cry and tell him he could never be man enough for you. Maybe even fart on him. But yeah he is stalking you, the highly sexual comments coupled with the messages and hoping to run into you after work, you should probably carry some pepper spray and maybe get a restraining order if it continues.
 
Always be blunt and honest. It probably feels uncomfortable but if you give an inch trying to be nice many guys will perceive that as interest. Don't leave room for misinterpretation, assert yourself. If a guy is being overtly sexual and you don't outright express your disinterest in very clear terms, they may think you are playing hard to get. Communication is very important, effective communication. But yeah it does sound like a potentially dangerous situation, but just like talk to him on the phone and be clear about everything so there is no misunderstanding. It's clear that he wants to fuck you and if you are seeing him around your work, there is nothing right about that.
 
This guy, from what you've described is behaving like a narcissist/sociopath or potential psycho. He wants and is demanding attention and is showing no regard for your feelings. I have no wish to 'freak' you out but the reason you are not communicating with him is probably because your animal intuition of danger is kicking in. I strongly advise not even attempting to reason it out with him. From what you have said you owe him no explanations of any kind and have made it abundantly clear (to a stable person anyway) that you do not want contact with him. Your feelings are of no consequence to him. In my opinion and I'm unfortunately experienced with these idiots even obtaining a restraining order will not stop this. A) because it's more attention and lets him know he's doing your head in and B) If he is what I feel him to be he will ignore it anyway and this may possibly escalate the situation. It's a toughie. I think it is worth visiting the local police to ask their advice and at least make them aware of the problem. I'd also suggest extreme caution like letting your neighbours/work colleagues etc know. May be changing your phone number is something to consider.
 
I acted similarly in a situation recently except for the fact that I have no sexual intentions with this person and it was because I reached out to them and shared a lot of personal stuff with them, about a past suicide attempt and that I was currently suicidal. I could hear people talking about me, a bunch of gossip from my back deck. The things I heard were untrue but I also heard things that were said that could only have been the person I was talking to. I asked if it was them and they denied it, I kept hearing people talking about me and the things they were saying were untrue and I kept telling this person the truth about all of those situations and saying these things aren't true, like I am pretty sure it's you it couldn't be anyone else. Hearing people just tear me apart when I was trying to change my life around and having horrible anxiety and hearing that the person I confided in was over there feeding into the bullying with personal info I shared with her just destroyed me. Opening up and being completely honest with someone only to have my most deep and personal details of my life become gossip and entertainment for these people is humiliating, and it becoming the reason why someone I confided in at a very vulnerable part of my life just dropped me without saying much of amything. My social anxiety is horrible and this happening without anyone actually talking to me face to face to see that what I am saying is true just made it so hard to go out and forge new relationships and trust that people are good and have good intentions.

I actually convinced myself I had schizophrenia rather than to believe this was happening. I guess I should have just accepted the fact that this was happening and that I would never get the chance to tell this person to her face that these things aren't true whatsoever. They even started going to every single person I know and had them lie to me as well, my NA meeting I was going to for support as well. Just a horrible case of bullying when I was suicidal and nothing I could ever say will allow me the chance to show her that everything I am saying is completely true and that this situation destroyed me mentally and it was nothing more than a complete violation of my trust and sense of self worth. This is one case where I have no sexual or romantic intentions and after all this bullying and having every single honest detail of my private life scrutinized and decided to be a lie, being called a faggot and a loser and a liar when I go out for a smoke. It's cruel and bullying and I kept messaging her and telling her that it's ok if she doesn't want to be my friend but it was so very important that I be able to show her that I am telling the truth and that people are cruel sadistic assholes. In this case it isn't what it looks like and it's just so cruel but in being able to get through this without giving up I will be a stronger person and people are cruel and they will take every opportunity they can to pick on someone when they are down as a form of entertainment. It's the complete mental distress and sadistic violation of my trust that had me just pleading with her to understand that my intentions are what I said they are and the effect it was having on me was horrible.

This is why I stress communication and not coming to conclusions because in this case they are wrong and it almost drove me to suicide but I guess I should have accepted what was happening. They went to my doctor, my NA meeting and to all the people I talk to and told them I was a liar and the result is that it has destroyed everything I tried to do for my recovery and get iver my anxiety. It made me believe I was schizophrenic and it was just sadistic and cruel.

In your case it definitely sounds like that man has sexual intentions and is stalking you. Being upfront as soon as someone keeps making sexual advances after you have expressed disinterest is necessary in every situation. If after you have made it clear they keep going then threaten legal action. Stalking you at work is definitely cause for a restraining order.
 
^ Aw, omg, I'm so sorry that happened to you. That sounds horrible. :/ I mean, that's pretty horrible to be bullied and insulted, not believed, called a liar. Argh, my hear aches for you. I hope you are in a better place now and what an unfortunate situation. PM me anytime you want to talk. :)
 
Cut him out of your life, before the situation gets any worse. It sounds harsh but this guy is not your friend and is one of those people who can't take a hint that you are not into him.
 
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