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Wanted

TJ5

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 27, 2005
Messages
305
Location
So. Cali
Wanted


Going over her homework assignment from her psychology class, TJ had the names of all her prior relationships/affairs written down. Beside each name, per Miss Bunt's direction, several negative qualities that each particular person possessed were also written. The class was not allowed to write any positive traits because the purpose of this assignment was to get Miss Bunt's point across. After looking at all the men and examining all the negative traits, she began writing down on another piece of paper those traits that had cropped up 3 or more times. After all the annoying traits that were written down, Miss Bunt's assignment was to write a personal add. Looking over her list of relationships, TJ did indeed notice about 5 traits kept cropping up besides all tbe guy's names she'd been more than platonic friends with. The class was supposed to write a wanted ad for the personals using the most common negative traits that had become a pattern. Laughing, TJ began writing her ad. It read as follows:

WANTED:

Self absorbed, controlling, unreliable ego maniac desired for unpredictable and childish relationship. Must be critical, cheap, obnoxious, and throw temper tantrums in public. Whiny, irresponsible alcoholics a definite plus! Honest men with jobs need not apply. I only go out with angry, rebellious men that are always right and insist on yelling at me on the phone in the middle of the night when they don't get their way. Considerate mature men are a major bore. I'm looking for that perfect asshole I can always count on to swear at me loud enough for the neighbors to complain and call the cops. If you have the violent foul mouth I've been looking for, look no further! Women like me truly know how to appreciate a cocksucking son of a bitch! No imitations accepted. If you are not impotent, don't bother to reply. Impractical space cases preferred but not required.

9/7/00
 
So where do I apply? ;)

Seriously though, I really like this! A cool idea.
 
we are, indeed, all relationship repeat offenders.
its hard to learn from these lessons and easier to allow the patterns to occur.
i myself have, fortunately, chosen well... the few times i've been so lucky.
 
spgeddi said:
we are, indeed, all relationship repeat offenders.
its hard to learn from these lessons and easier to allow the patterns to occur.

LOL. Until I did a bit of research though after my painful split from my ex fiance in 1993, this was very hard to discern for the fact that all the personalities of my ex bf's were SO different from each other. What I learned though is that no matter how many positive traits or lack of negative traits goin on in each individual ex bf , in my case, a certain stubborn few main negative traits I kept attracting, though unaware of the fact I was doing it at the time. I didn't see it until I actually was told to do that exercise which was an eye opener. (Holy fuck lol) The reasons 4 attracting the wrong types are numerous and various from person to person.

What I've been told by a few with long standing successful positive SO relationships is that any malfunctioning part of ourselves has to be replaced and repaired with/by the right parts, via right choices, and maintained with tune ups, fluid levels, oil change every 3000 miles, ect for emotionally healthy person. Otherwise, forcing an engine to run on old oil a quart low & running on 5 cyclinders instead of 8, for example will have an S/O relationship that runs slow, sluggish, with poor gas mileage, whose timing is off and misfiring at best. A car that has mostly good traits will attract different types of drivers than the car that has mostly bad traits. I know how fuckin lame that sounds, but only way I can think of to get my point across if I'm makin any sense at all...


____________________________________________________
7/4/2006
Limbo Gear

Aye such a state I find myself in
It's as if I'm livin half outside
The other half, vascillating, has died
What the fuck, somethings shaken

My world is falling down
Like some upheaval, earthquaken
Tumbling down and around
Shattered concrete, city buried underground

What the fuck is wrong with me
Out of the blue I don't want to be loaded
I don't want to be clean
The full rig has my fix, let it be noted

I've emptied my shot
I feel the rush, feeling hot
That's what I paid for
My money's worth, I got

So what's with the change
I don't understand
A junky getting her fix
Yet feeling estranged

Out of the blue
From whence this came
I wish I knew?
I'm stuck in a limbo state

I don't want to be clean
Don't want to be spun
I want to WANT to get off
Why so indifferent, to this cough

And to this rushation
As if the lovin feelins gone
What's going on? What is wrong?
My world is shifting,

Why am I drifting
In this state of limbo
Half in one realm
Part of the under realm

Causht between the living
And the land of the undead
Don't want to be clean
What more can be said

Yet don't want to be spun
What brought this on?
Have I come undone?
I don't like this shifting

Feeling uneasy, drifting
Not in the land of the living
Not in the land of the dead
Not wanting to fix as my friends push off
Only wanting to WANT to get high

Not jonesin the cough
How can the desire
Just like that up and leave
This is just great

My reality as I know it
My whole world around
Is topsy turvy, upside down
HELLOOOOOO someone something

Help get me the fuck out of here
Don't leave me hangin
Not wantin to be clean
Not wantin my gear






We are the moon, the distant reward. Come hither, sweet Kupid, whom heaven adored




______________________________________________________________________
(Wordy) said:
There are many things I love about this: the honesty / nakedness, the flow, the contradictions, the doublethink of desire ("I want to WANT to get off" / "Only wanting to WANT to get high"), the cruelty / suffering of the world (they're in there too).


____________________________________________________________________-

7/7/2006

Shoot Up or Shut Up Please
by Erik and TJ


Voice 1: Chasing dental like clouds in heavan
(lady sings line in sweet voice)


Voice 2:
Flick....Flick..Inflect
(says 'flick flick inflect ' simaltaneously as voice 1 says last syllable of above word heavan)


Voice 3: TIE OFF!
(Yells 'tie off' when voice 2 says 2nd half of last word 'inflect simaltaneously)


Voice 4: Miss Miss Miss Miss FUCK!! Miss Miss
(Yells above line simaltaneously when voice 3 is saying the word "off"


Voice 2: A bloody stump for nothing


Voice 3: HIT! Miss Miss Miss
(Yells above line simaltaneously when Voice 2 saying 2nd syllable of the word 'nothing')


Voice 4: But a skin pop FUCK!! miss miss miss
(Yells above line simaltaneously when voice 3 yells the last word 'miss')


Voice 2: Miss Miss Miss Miss MRS. JONES!



Smaktie!
Voice 3: (yells 'smaktie' simaltaneously during voice 2's last word 'please')


Voice 4: Shoot up or shut up please!!!
(Yells above during 2nd syllable of 'Smaktie' simaltaneously)



Voice 2: Tie off!!
(Yells above during Voice 4's simaltaneous last word 'please')


Voice 3: Flick...flick....inflect
(says above words simaltaneously when Voice 2 saying the word 'off')


Voice 1: Chasing dental like clouds in heavan
(sings above line simaltaneously when voice 3 is saying last syllable of last word 'inflect')


Voice 2: Tie off!!
(simaltaneously as voice 1 says last syllable of above word heavan)

Voice 3: miss, miss, FUCK! miss Miss MISS
MISS
(simaltaneously as #2 says 'off!')

Voice 4: Hit! but a skin pop! Miss Miss Miss Miss Miss FUCK!!!
a BLOODY stump for NOTHING!

Voice 2: Flick flick inflect Miss Miss Miss Miss Miss MISS MISS MRS JONES!
(simaltaneously says above during #4's last syllable of last word 'nothing')

Voice 3: TIE OFF!
(simaltaneously says above as #2 saying the last word 'JONES')

Voice 4: SHOOT UP OR SHUT UP PLEASE!

Voice 2: SMAKTIE!
(simaltaneously as #4 is saying 'PLEASE')

Repeats itself non stop in an infinite round/cycle from the start

______________________________________________________________________________________

Chasing dental like clouds in heaven


Flick....Flick..Inflect

TIE OFF!

Miss Miss Miss Miss FUCK Miss Miss

A bloody stump for nothing

HIT! Miss Miss Miss

But a skin pop FUCK! miss miss miss


Miss Miss Miss Miss MRS. JONES!

Smaktie!

Shoot up or shut up please!!!

Tie off!!

Flick...flick....inflect

Chasing dental like clouds in heavan

Tie off!!

miss, miss, FUCK! miss Miss MISS
MISS

Hit! but a skin pop! Miss Miss Miss Miss Miss FUCK!!!
a BLOODY stump for NOTHING!

Flick flick inflect Miss Miss Miss Miss Miss MISS MISS MRS JONES!

TIE OFF!

SHOOT UP OR SHUT UP PLEASE!

SMAKTIE!
 
Last edited:
hahahahaha i laughed so hard.

youd love to date me!

err... in response to the OP. i have no idea whats going on up there ^
 
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