I would find a therapist that has a specialty in co-occurring mental disorders. Most addicts are self medicating a larger problem innate to them. From the time I was a youth I was medicating OCD that I didn't understand (I was under the impression that everyone's brains and mentality were like mine) and depression which lead me into a life of addiction that lasted until I was in my thirties. I was diagnosed with OCD at eighteen at my first rehab stay. That gave me the diagnosis but they did nothing to help me treat it. Now I take part in CBT. Sometimes it is embarrassing but I still get out this worksheet my therapist gave me when I have an irrational intrusive thought and it causes an intense fear response in me. The worksheet is helpful because it takes away a bit of the power the original though has and sheds light on why having that fight or flight response is not helpful. The rehab that worked for me was based on behavioral change and therapy. Yes there were twelve step meetings involved for those that they help, but what worked for me the most was being away from my drug of choice and having a
licensed therapist work on a diagnosis and treatment plan for my mental disorders.
You say you have anxiety and depression. Are you taking any meds or seeking treatment for those? If you haven't been these will always lead you back to active use. Once your brain has learned that it gets relief instantly by using it is hard to break that cycle. It is necessary to break that cycle before you walk out of rehab. It is actually better to start working on it before you leave for rehab as most rehabs (if you check out the stickied {red threads at the top of the thread list} about rehabs you will see most have too many patients to spend enough individual time with each).
Kudos on starting the tapering process. It will make things quite a lot easier.
I went to lifestream (
read more about lifestream) and the services they offered were amazing. I will send that email today to my counselor. Check the website for lifestream out. I have been to rehabs in new york, pennsylvania and florida. This was the best rehab I went to, and the fact they offer continuing care after rehab (lets face it. The door to rehab is not magical. You don't walk in broken, and 28 days later you walk out fixed.). They also focus on the mental health aspect of recovery. There are only 16 beds which with two licensed therapists means only eight per therapist. You meet for an hour once a week. The therapists lead the groups as well.
When seeking treatment you must ask these questions.
1.How many beds are there. The higher the number the less individual treatment, and the more shenanigans that will happen. This is also indicative of a money mill rehab.
2.Ask about how many therapists they have and their credentials. If they won't tell you then they probably don't have them.
3.Ask if it is abstinence based, or are narcotic psychiatric meds available. If you take benzos this is particularly important. They will pretty much drop you in dose so quickly that you have dangerous withdrawals.
4. Ask if they offer family counseling. Addiction and alcoholism are family diseases. Just as you, Nikki, need to recognize and change your ways, so to does your closest family in order to start the healing process.
5. Ask what services they offer in addition to substance abuse treatment. Do they have guided meditation? Do they have seminars about life skills? Do they have acupuncture? etc..
Remember; If it seems too good to be true. Chances are it is. Ask around and get a good idea of what is available in your area.