I'm a very extroverted person, and I used to LOVE the "euphoria" and everything stimulants produced (d/l-amphetamine- Adderall, crystal methamphetamine, not so much cocaine.)
But that "euphoria" got old real fast (not tolerance, just it seems that I realized that the "euphoria" wasn't really "euphoric"... lol.)
So although I was using uppers pretty much consistantly for about a year and a half, all the comedowns, the people invovled in using uppers, the physiological toll uppers take on you, and in general just not being able to feel/seem "normal" or at LEAST semi-"normal" made me tired of uppers real fast.
I even did methamphetamine (d-meth) last week, in over a year and a half of not using any amphetamines or other uppers (other than small doses of caffeine) besides one time using cocaine a year ago... and the high wasn't all that great like how I remembered, it made me scatterbrained instead of the usual former feelings of being able to think really straight, and the comedown and everything all together (not being able to sleep even with benzos, etc.) just made me realize why I stopped doing uppers and why I have no cravings (thank god) for uppers.
So, I chose "B" in the poll.
Downers do so much more for me. I do have GAD and social anxiety, and although at first uppers helped with social anxiety, overall they just made me feel horrible more than better.
With downers, opioids, ONCE in a while I get minor paranoia, but it's nothing really I'd say is uncomfortable. Overall, opioids are nice, but they cloud my mind too much, and since I'm an "up" person I like to think a lot, and although being doped out is nice, once going cold turkey and getting clean it feels REAL good sometimes to be able to think with a clear mind all over again (besides the depression, exacerbated anxiety, lonliness, etc. other psychological withdrawal symptoms, heh.) Opioids are nice though, and I wish I could just get rid of them like how I did with uppers... but ugh, psychological w/d is just too much at times (I really can't say I get "cravings" for opioids, and I've done a fuck load of opioids from morphine to H to hydromorphone (all of these IVed), to fentanyl (smoked) to oxycodone (IVed), etc. the list goes on.)
So although I don't get cravings for opioids, it's just that fucking psychological withdrawal at times that makes opioids feel so damn good again. Heh.
With benzos, everything in life is easier. Benzodiazepines make life just so much more fun and interesting to live in (at therapeudic or slightly more than therapeudic doses though, not extremely high or too low doses.)
I'm a thinker, I like my mental faculties to be 100% usually. I guess this is why I loved uppers at first, heh... hell uppers got me into so many intellecutal pursuits (philosophy especially, LOL at reading Either/Or by Kierkegaard, both parts, in one night twacked out hahaha!!)
But now it's downers all the way, with breaks for the opioids, or opioids that don't give you that mental cloud (so I can take them all the time and be 100% in mental acuity. hahaha
)
:D
