Pharcyde
Bluelighter
So dude I up n disappeared amirite? Yall mustve thought I was dead or in jail. Well there is on main problem I had that makes the others seem like nothing. The months maybe around 7 or so we full of legal, mental, drug n alcohol issues....but the biggest was love. So Im going to skip a bunch but Ill say this: I added another notch to the ole criminal record and the doctors say I might be crazy.
So here goes. I came home early..twas supposed to be a suprise, it sure as fuck turned out to be. So I got a ride to the house and walk up the driveway there is a different car there, ok thats weird. I sneak around to the sliding glass door to see my wife and another guy in their pajamas huggin up on eachother in the kitchen making breakfast at first I was like
then I 
. Needless to say their french toast didnt get flipped when I walked in.
I just walked into the house, they were saying things to me but I couldnt hear. Ive been in rages where I cant hear anything and time slows down, but this was different. Like all feeling was sucked out of my body and I was just there. Like an out of body experience. I did look to see if the guest bed was messed up like what was happening wasnt what I thought, no its still made......now my bed I could tell two people had been sleeping there and this dude had a bag there so they mustve been together the whole time I was gone.
I remember her like a foot away from me as Im packing more clothes touching me saying things but I couldnt hear what they were. So I packed my bag and walked to my friends house...its like a 30 minute walk but it ony seemed to take five. I got on a bus after a night of heavy booze n drugs and now Im down state.
The weird part is I dont feel anything. I went out with my family and usually I have to be on drugs for that but it seems like feeling nothing at all is a drug in itself. Ive been drinking my self into oblivion for like 4 maybe 5 days now. Nothing pops into my head about it, Im not the once happy boy I was before. I shouldve know somthing like this would happen all the text messages I intecepted to this guy, and they talk all the time. WTF?
tl:dr
Caught muh wife with another dude
"I always knew it would end up just like this, so pour me one last drink wit the finale kiss"
So here goes. I came home early..twas supposed to be a suprise, it sure as fuck turned out to be. So I got a ride to the house and walk up the driveway there is a different car there, ok thats weird. I sneak around to the sliding glass door to see my wife and another guy in their pajamas huggin up on eachother in the kitchen making breakfast at first I was like
then I . Needless to say their french toast didnt get flipped when I walked in.I just walked into the house, they were saying things to me but I couldnt hear. Ive been in rages where I cant hear anything and time slows down, but this was different. Like all feeling was sucked out of my body and I was just there. Like an out of body experience. I did look to see if the guest bed was messed up like what was happening wasnt what I thought, no its still made......now my bed I could tell two people had been sleeping there and this dude had a bag there so they mustve been together the whole time I was gone.
I remember her like a foot away from me as Im packing more clothes touching me saying things but I couldnt hear what they were. So I packed my bag and walked to my friends house...its like a 30 minute walk but it ony seemed to take five. I got on a bus after a night of heavy booze n drugs and now Im down state.
The weird part is I dont feel anything. I went out with my family and usually I have to be on drugs for that but it seems like feeling nothing at all is a drug in itself. Ive been drinking my self into oblivion for like 4 maybe 5 days now. Nothing pops into my head about it, Im not the once happy boy I was before. I shouldve know somthing like this would happen all the text messages I intecepted to this guy, and they talk all the time. WTF?
tl:dr
Caught muh wife with another dude
"I always knew it would end up just like this, so pour me one last drink wit the finale kiss"
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Take it slow guy.
![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
Your story made me think of that whole situation so many years ago. I just remember him calling and saying that he thought I wouldn't care. WAT? Anyway, the hatred, numbness, anger..everything...fades. For a while, I wanted him back after about 3-4 months of the shock wearing off. Now, I look back and think how stupid I was to want that. I look back at my rage and anger and everything I did. I went through a stage where I thought that maybe I was wrong...maybe he loved me over her and it was just not real. It's all part of that denial stage. 
), but i think over the years if you were not the genuine, clever, honest, care-bearish potty-mouth, intelligent, life lover you come across as here, IRL, you wouldn't of been able to keep up the act this long.