This girl is telling her boyfriend that her dxm use is DMT or PCP

[angeltart]

I saw this play. This was the story line.

For some reason, this girl is telling her boyfriend her dxm use is pcp/dmt. He is fine with LSD. He is fine with the idea of pcp/dmt, even though he has never taken it. In this story, this girl had used dxm almost 20 years ago quite a bit. When they were going through a rough patch, she decided to plateau sigma, to truly give a "non-connected" thought to her actions, and their relationship. It actually worked out great. I think she thought he would believe her to be insane to ingest generic cough medicine, and the idea of street/plant drugs was way more "on the level".

Both are grown adults, with professional jobs. Both have graduate degrees. It is frustrating for the girl in the story. She really wants to be honest, but is really scared. What would you do? She is honest with everything else.. down to how many cookies she will eat in a day.. they don't keep secrets.. she wanted to share with him her "spiritual experience".. that is why she told him it was a "pcp/dmt" like medication.

 

[Transform]

Please note that we don't discuss things in the third person here because it offers no legal protection and makes reading posts challenging.

If you want to be honest you're just going to have to be honest. If it helps you could say that you bought it as a powder, as it can be found in this form.

 

[Solipsis]

You're not far from the truth with 'PCP-like medication' at all, right? They are indeed both dissociatives. Why would this guy make a problem out of DXM if PCP or DMT are fine? Is it purely the fact that you technically lied?
In my opinion a decent relationship should be able to resist a lie that seems like a mere formality. You didn't hide anything about it, but a detail. Why did you anyway? It doesn't even seem like an admission to talk about is, but almost rather like a clarification, that to elaborate further on this medication being PCP-like is to say that like PCP it is a dissociative drug called DXM, with a number of differences and similarities, and yes it happens to have medical value and is sold as a medication. But if you are actually apologetic about it, what is there to worry about?

This is more about relationship advice / discussion, than drug talk, it seems.. but ok if you really want it here instead of the love / sex / relationship forum? otherwise i can move it.

 

[angeltart]

Sorry.. I thought fictional third person was different. I guess writing in theater script form wouldn't work either

It feels so silly, as if one chemical is "cooler", than the other. It's admitting you like boxed wine, to someone who will only drink something a sommelier brings them. There is a level of hypocrisy. Stigma is stigma, whether it is justified or not. That is the great "puzzle". How to share the truth with someone, and not have the truth clouded by prejudice.

I really do appreciate your comment. I've wanted to share this with others who might understand. Knowing at least one person read it.. and gave me feedback.. it really makes me feel better

 

[angeltart]

I didn't realize those forums were for drug/relationship things. Sorry, I am new.. and I am still finding my way around. Moving it would be cool.

Lies by omission, are sometimes even worse in my mind. They are more deceptive and manipulative. I know it is all a perception thing. One sometimes needs to weigh out living life to the morals and ethics ones has imposed as "important, with the level of damage the entire truth would impose. It is funny how when one tries to go and set their own "code of conduct", instead of following organized religion.. Catholic school guilt never goes away

 

[Solipsis]

Oh, right I get it. Well, don't feel bad about... we all sometimes try to make ourselves come off better some way or another. I'd say there is something admirable in admitting you were wrong or foolish or just a little plain silly to do something cause it takes a bigger person. Just explain what you did and why, then.. rather than to make excuses about it, explain how DXM has similar potential despite it's legal availability, but might even have less risk at mania than PCP. Although there are certainly downsides to the drug. It's just not as simple as looking at it at a glance and just seeing a few associations, the stigmata and prejudice and connotations.
Again: the trust you share ought to be stronger than the prejudices that might be popping up in his head at first. It's really just up to you whether you'd prefer to let this slide as something for the good of your images of each other... but yeah personally it seems I am just starting with a potential relationship and I am starting out very open about things, admitting to a lot of faults and strangeness even if I have plenty of other things to be proud of. Feels great to base a connection with someone on the truth, like you say your habit is like as well. But let's not blow this out of proportion more than we already might be? no offense whatever you do, try to relax about it imo

 

[angeltart]

I over analyze WAAAAY too much! I really appreciate your response. The ability to even have an open discussion about this makes me feel much more relaxed. Sometimes you need to bounce ideas off of others, it's a good way to check sanity.

 

[DrGreenthumb]

Surely if he's fine with PCP then DXM isn't going to be a problem? I wasn't aware PCP had some high class image. PCP has never been a popular drug here as far as I know, but back when I was younger all the "face eating bath salt addict" type stories were about Americans on PCP. If you were my girlfriend I'd be relieved if you told me you'd actually been doing DXM, not PCP. PCP-like isn't that far off the mark, it's the same class of drugs, but I'd guess DXM doesn't have the same danger of turning you manic.

 

[kingme]

i think this is indeed more of a relationship thread than anything else.

theres two sides to this.

first, if you really are grown ups and professional and open and honest there is no reason not to share this secret with him. if there will be bumps in the relationship it will most certainly not be because you misrepresented a drug use to him but because of other reasons, especially in your described situation

two, you really are overthinking this. you may as well not tell him anything and not think about it any more. it is clear to me that if he is ok with you using pcp/dmt and not dxm that he may as well be a bit ignorant of drugs - and i mean this in the most innocent of ways. there would be little in my opinion that could be gained, other than your peace of mind.