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Benzos Think I've finally damaged myself with benzos

You should try to get on a benzo that is less intoxicating in its effects. Something like clorazepate, chlordiazepoxide, and oxazepam, are all less intoxicating and have long half-lives and so would be ideal for someone having trouble getting into a rhythm on a taper. They work but aren't especially strong so there is less desire to try to abuse them.

I have been through benzo withdrawal and it is no fun for sure, but I expect you'll probably be like me and be really glad in like a year that you got off when you did. Life is so much less up and down now for sure.
 
To the OP

Exactly what benzo are you taking, and what total dose per day?
We can only help you if you give us these.

Robot is right, you are causing damage, and the more 'runs' on benzo you have, the more damaged your symptoms will be.
I abused benzos and z drugs which are related to benzos with the same withdrawal.

I would stabilise on the same dose every day, preferabley of a long acting benzo like librium, valium or klonopin, and then taper when you are stable.
Daily cutting is the onlly thing that worked for me, I just could not cope with the tapers where you cut a bit and then wait and cut more. Even 0.125mg valium cuts a month were too much for me.
I do far better on daily tapers and lose over 0.3mg a month.

There is a way out. Cutting daily (provided you cut at the right amount) can actually slowly upregulate your receptors. I dunno the science behind it, but the friendly people at benzodetoxrecovery do and they are what helped me.
Sadly they don't take any members at the moment as they are too busy, due to their success, but I don't mind you pm'ing me, I will get you off benzos safely, but you must be very disciplined with your use.

I know it's hard, because abusing benzos feels good and I didn't want to let go, but I was forced to let go as I got slammed with withdrawals, and became scared to use extra. I still am, I won't touch another benzo. Why bother when valerian does just as good a job if not better, or even sceletium tortuosum?
 
I actually think I am over the worst this time. The peak for coming off short-acting benzos seems to be be after 3 days, and now it's been 5 days and my blood pressure and heart rate have started calming down. It was very noticable when it started speeding up, pretty much when I went to bed for the night, it's like it keeps you in constant fight-or-flight state and won't allow you to really relax.

I already had some experience with tapering down on Oxazepam a month ago. You're right, daily cutting was very successful. It seems as long as your body has SOME benzo in it, it can work as normal, but as soon as it runs out all hell breaks lose. I know it needs to be tapered but had a delivery failure and ran out and I can't really show up at the RE and beg for pills again.

I spent a few days cutting down before I ran out, and suprisingly Alcohol really helped. I would never have thought, it's the last thing I want when I'm so sick, but it does a lot of the same so you don't notice much difference. I hate the shitty mood it puts you in. Now I'm kind of ok, but it started out really bad with high anxiety and irritability. It doesn't make you despair like opiate withdrawal...it just puts you in this lousy mood that is really shitty.
 
^really don't drink alcohol again in benzo withdrawal, it can cause seizures as you rebound from the alcohol when it wears off. Yeah i've done it too in desperate times but it's dangerous.

Are you coming off a short acting benzo? even those will take some time but some people escape benzo withdrawal without too much pain but consider yourself lucky this time because i can guarantee you next time, you won't be so lucky.
 
Ninae said:
I actually think I am over the worst this time. The peak for coming off short-acting benzos seems to be be after 3 days, and now it's been 5 days and my blood pressure and heart rate have started calming down. It was very noticable when it started speeding up, pretty much when I went to bed for the night, it's like it keeps you in constant fight-or-flight state and won't allow you to really relax.

I already had some experience with tapering down on Oxazepam a month ago. You're right, daily cutting was very successful. It seems as long as your body has SOME benzo in it, it can work as normal, but as soon as it runs out all hell breaks lose. I know it needs to be tapered but had a delivery failure and ran out and I can't really show up at the RE and beg for pills again.

I spent a few days cutting down before I ran out, and suprisingly Alcohol really helped. I would never have thought, it's the last thing I want when I'm so sick, but it does a lot of the same so you don't notice much difference. I hate the shitty mood it puts you in. Now I'm kind of ok, but it started out really bad with high anxiety and irritability. It doesn't make you despair like opiate withdrawal...it just puts you in this lousy mood that is really shitty.
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I have noticed a lot of people tend to peak with their symptoms at 14 days. Dunno what it is about 14 days or two weeks-ish, but that's when sx seem to peak.
I dunno though, I hope you are out of the woods, but I would hate for you to get wose. I would go and get pills so if things do go pear shaped you can take them, but if all is well after 14 days, then take them back to the chemist to be disposed of, and never take another benzo again.
They can really turn darkside and you end up being a prisoner in your own mind.
 
Yea, I received some Etizolam today, and after taking two I feel fine. Don't really feel up for getting off it yet, at least not CT like that, which should really be avoided. It felt like the worst was over after 3-5 days (maybe because I'd only been taking them for a month now).

But it sucks getting physically addicted to benzos like that. I don't even enjoy them, and would only use them to calm me down from side-effects from other drugs, or as a substitute for more effective drugs. So getting really dependent on them, too, really sucks.

At they same time they're so useful for many things, though, like Insomnia, etc. not to mention for the side-effects caused by more stimulant drugs. And as they're so cheap/easily available that makes your use hard to limit. There's even been times when I've blacked out and come to myself to find 35 pills missing...so no wonder my addiction is back soon again.
 
I am SOO confused as I am trying to quit xanax also... I read that I should switch over to a long acting benzo like valium, but I then read that I won't even feel side effects until day 14? ARE YOU KIDDING?!!! I already am on a benzo on which I feel side effects very quickly (in between doses or overnight). I read that you cannot come off of xanax by itself. I am on .5mg 4 times daily. And their was a time that I binged heavy (up to 6 mg a day). I was on a stable dose of 2.5 mg's for over a year with binging in between. Now i managed to lower my stable dose to 2.0 mg a day. I wake up miserably thinking about suicide everyday and I do not know if this is because of withdrawal? or tolerance withdrawal? I have no hope in the morning as I look at everything in a veryyyyy dark light....It is 8:39 a.m and I have yet to still take my first dose. I wait till 9 a.m. and fight these feelings until then, and even after I do not always feel better....I am confused on if I should attempt to switch to valium to taper or not since the withdrawals don't start till day 14??!! I hear the worst of withdrawal from xanax are between 3-5 days....After nearly having a panic attack or mental breakdown last month, I decided this was it and have been seeking psychologist. I also am legally prescribed these meds as I can ask for something different If it will help. I am not interested in going on another medication unless it is just to get off of xanax....I want off everything, including marijuana which is a whole other story..
 
Based on my first person experience, as ex benzo junkie with daily usage of 15-20 mg of flunitrazepam IV for more than 8 months, tapering under psichiatric and psycologic therapy can be quick, painless and easy without that great WD syndrome, you just need the right tapering schedule and right medications plus a weekly visit to your therapist to check the progress and to adjust dosage step by step.

Forget a diy tapering bro, will be 10 times harder than doing it under medical help.
 
IDK about Ninae, but I cannot afford to get "medical help" that you are talking about...not only am I on medicaid which only covers a couple of days of rehab or out patient....and not only that, but I am a licensed security guard. This will instantly cause me to loose my license If i checked into a rehab or detox or anything of that sort. A taper schedule is the only route I will accept. I will also see myself very negatively if I have to check into a rehab type thing. I believe I am strong enough to do it without that...I know that getting help is not anything to look at negatively, but I cant do in house or anything like that. I am seeing a pyschologist and my regular doctor often and that already makes me more depressed than I already am...
 
^a rehab won't do much for a benzo junkie anyway, your best bet is to just get some therapy while you're tapering and when you finally come off benzos it won't be as bad, which i guess you are doing. I find social workers more helpful than psychologists FWIW and cheaper. It's not so much about strength but doing it right the first time so that it's the last time. If you don't taper properly and sort out your issues, you'll likely end up in the benzo cycle at some point or another, not particularly you but in general.

Xanax withdrawals should peak in the first week at most, not even close to 14 days. Even diazepam withdrawals will peak before 14 days. I find there are different periods of withdrawal, first week i go crazy, literally, second week, extreme muscle pain, stomach issues, sleep, anxiety, nightmares, sensitivity to everything, third week, deralization and depersonalization and then the symptoms start to subside and that's with long acting benzos, diazepam, clonazepam and phenazepam.

Short acting benzos, really after a week, i start to feel the symptoms subside but the PAWS are the worst in both cases, lasting a long time, i dont even like to mention how long because it scares people but best not to fuck around with benzos, especially if you need them.

@buds: switch over to valium now, you could taper with xanax if you have the discipline, it doesn't make a difference really, you just have to make sure there is a steady amount of that benzo in your bloodstream. The trade off with diazepam is that you are going to have extended shitty withdrawals that aren't near as bad but last as long as your taper and linger afterwards. I imagine since you dropped your dose to 2mg/day is why you feel like that. Every dose drop i do, i get the same shit, people say tapering is easy but every dose drop is terrible after the first 1 or 2. Luckily you are only at 2mg/day, i'm at the equivalent of about 10mg of xanax a day (12mg etizolam) or so, so that's not bad at all. Usually you'll feel better a week or so after doing a dose drop.

TL;DR the shorter acting the benzo the more intense withdrawal and the less time to get out of acute withdrawal, the opposite applies to long acting benzos, and for medium well i'm sure you can guess how it goes. Xanax withdrawals should hit you day 1 (or even as soon as it leaves your body) and peak within the first week.
 
budsnbars

It is better to GRADUALLY crossover from xanax to either klonopin, or valium, remembering that 1mg xnax =20mg valium.
You sound like you are in classaic withdrawal with those distressing mornings, which sound all to familiar.

Ideally, you would get in a stable place to start a taper.

I found that weekly or monthly or forthnightly cuts were too much of a shock, and took too long to recover from, but i have been tapering daily and that has been working well.

How long have you been at 2mg xanax a day?

Please get help for suicidal feelings, and know that they are only the benzo speaking.
 
Not true, daily often takes less time.

Also, doctors dont recognise that some people need more time and cause more damage by whipping some patients off too quick.
 
Ninae said:
Thanks, I know that now, but I already went to the ER and begged for sleeping pills Easter Eve. I never thought they would give me any. I just assumed I'd have to check myself in for observation, like I have before, and they might give me intravenous Valium. But he gave me 25 Sobril instead (or the receptionist asked me if I wanted sleeping pills).

Not that we was very willing, I think it was more just in case so I wouldn't die, as I was very close to having a seizure. But it's not like I can turn up after a month and expect another prescription, so I'm not going to bother. Seems like I'm over the worse (or have reached the plateau) now I'm on my 4th day and I have some Kratom exstract.

It works funny during benzo WD - like it's both calming and stimulating. It doesn't have the same effect as usual for me but relieves the withdrawal somewhat.
Click to expand...

Doesn't kratom lower one's seizure threshold?

Anyways, I am coming of a very mild period of Etizolam use and am tapering just to be safe. I also happen to have tons of extra gabapentin. I have found gabapentin has allowed me to drop my dose tremendously. Main concern was rebound anxiety and it seems to work great. Also very good for phenibut withdrawal. Plus, it is an anti-seizure med.
 
3dmusic, I have been on basically 2.5 mg's since I have began about 3 years ago. I dropped to 2.0 about a month ago and felt very unstable mentally while I did it (not realizing it was withdrawal). It started with 1-2 mg and I have been up and down as I self-medicated. I was messing around with up to 6 mg's a day also a while back...For a long time though, my regular dosage was 2.5 mg's. Just over a month ago, I did binge on a cruise as I was ultra-depressed. I have been on 2.0 for a solid month now..even before that I would wake up feeling very badly though. I was told it might be tolerance withdrawal and/or rebound anxiety. The last time I can think of that I woke up happy was when I first started taking xanax and would feel "refreshed" in the morning....
 
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