vonSader
Greenlighter
Hello all.
I hope I'm posting in the correct place.
I've had (no "swim" my history is no secret) a Heroin habit for about 30/33 yrs. Way back at the beginning the pleasure I received was commensurate with the quality & quantity I used. I've never injected, my veins are too deep and I'm no vein-hound, so am not, and am not about to go digging when smoking did the trick.
I've been on a three bag a day habit for most of this time, with periods of weening myself off and staying clean for up to three years, but the wicked sister always call's me back. At present I'm using once or twice a week.
The past 3 years though, I have notice that I get very little, if any, resulting pleasure or sensation from smoking. It's all about the ritual. But I still do it, eyes open with no self deception. The reason for this post is to get some feedback from fellow indulgers. I get no 'high' at all anymore. Even when I use 5 bags in a row within a 45 minute period I still get nothing out of it, high wise. If a friend injects me I get some small remuneration but still very little, and certainly nothing like I once did.
So I'm left wondering what's going on? I know it isn't the quality as I have a circle of chums who have used for many many years and they all get high on the same stuff that does nowt for moi. This leaves me wondering what is going on.
Why can't I get high anymore? Why is it that I get no pleasure anymore? Does the body acclimatize to such a degree and is it common? Those are my questions. I relish the ritual and so continue, but I do miss the warm safety I used to experience. So why and how do I evince little physical pleasure anymore?
Educate me please.
I hope I'm posting in the correct place.
I've had (no "swim" my history is no secret) a Heroin habit for about 30/33 yrs. Way back at the beginning the pleasure I received was commensurate with the quality & quantity I used. I've never injected, my veins are too deep and I'm no vein-hound, so am not, and am not about to go digging when smoking did the trick.
I've been on a three bag a day habit for most of this time, with periods of weening myself off and staying clean for up to three years, but the wicked sister always call's me back. At present I'm using once or twice a week.
The past 3 years though, I have notice that I get very little, if any, resulting pleasure or sensation from smoking. It's all about the ritual. But I still do it, eyes open with no self deception. The reason for this post is to get some feedback from fellow indulgers. I get no 'high' at all anymore. Even when I use 5 bags in a row within a 45 minute period I still get nothing out of it, high wise. If a friend injects me I get some small remuneration but still very little, and certainly nothing like I once did.
So I'm left wondering what's going on? I know it isn't the quality as I have a circle of chums who have used for many many years and they all get high on the same stuff that does nowt for moi. This leaves me wondering what is going on.
Why can't I get high anymore? Why is it that I get no pleasure anymore? Does the body acclimatize to such a degree and is it common? Those are my questions. I relish the ritual and so continue, but I do miss the warm safety I used to experience. So why and how do I evince little physical pleasure anymore?
Educate me please.
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