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The worst drug binge of my life....

Hey guys,

Thanks for the replies. So good news, today is day 10, tomorrow 11 :)

Went out and had 3 pints with my mate, left my debit card at home and no problems at all. He was actually pretty drunk after 3 and I was waiting for him to get a 4th in but he wasn't feeling it so we just walked out.

It helps that the weather is really nice in England at the moment but my primary goal here is to get one full month without touching a drug (alcohol here are there is fine as long as I'm with the right crowd) Moreux - my best mates are all just drinkers, none of them do anything but booze!

Been to the gym for the last 7 days in a row and looking forward to a sunny day tomorrow :)

toothpastedog said:
What kind of support do you have? Any healthy/non-drug or alcohol using people in your life you trust, respect, and feel safe with? Think. Even if you have only one such friend, cling to him/her for a bit, as long as they are relatively healthy by any reasonable standard. . .
Click to expand...

Family are all aware of my situation and very supportive.
 
Day 13! I currently have an awful cold so that helps ha, no way I'm putting anything up my nose.

I have two job interviews next week so fingers crossed again. I will have to sell some possessions to fund my travel though.

The weird thing is that I don't actually WANT it. I don't know if I've ever been able to say that with 100% validity but at the moment the thought of coke and a comedown disgusts me. This weekend I will be doing nothing but revising for the interviews so that means come Monday, I'll be on day 17 :)

I'm really excited to see how my brain functions with a full month away from drugs. Safe to say it needs a LONG break. The end goal here is to never take cocaine again and look at using MDMA once / twice a year.
 
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Thanks guys! Two weeks today :) - another two weeks to go to reach my goal of one month so I'm half way there.
 
Update - I had a bit of a weird weekend.

The FA Cup Final was on Saturday so I went around my mates and watched that. Had 4 cans over the course of the game. I then stayed for the boxing so bought another 4 cans so drank 8 cans of beer in total. The first 4 were 5.6% and the other 4 were 3.6%. I drank these between 5:30PM and 1AM.

I met with my dealer late at night and bought 2x mdma tablets and a benzo. Very stupid decision but the most important thing is that I didn't take cocaine from him.

I have a job interview tomorrow so I'm regretting it but I've spent the last 4 hours preparing for it. I have to get some sleep now and then hopefully SMASH the job interview tomorrow.

I'm annoyed at myself but I'm looking at this in a positive way. I'm 17 days clean from cocaine and low doses of MDMA aren't the end of the world.

I've also started writing down the number of days clean from coke on my hand - helps remind me not to fuck up. I also have an app on my phone which is counting every day. I figure once I reach day 40-45, my brain will no longer crave it.
 
How did the interview go, or if it hasn't happened yet make sure to let us know. Try not to beat yourself up too bad, after all like you said at least you didn't get any blow, though even getting in touch with your dealer and not running like your life depended on it, as it kinda does, when you saw him wasn't necessarily the smartest move. What is important is where you are now though, and what positive stuff you can take away and learn from the event, that is what really counts a whole lot more, especially compared with a little MDMA and a benzo pill.
 
Thanks guys! The interview went really well and I should hear back soon.

I also met a recruiter today and he has let me know he could get me some freelance work at £150 a day.

Here comes the bad news....after the interview I went and got smashed. (9 pints) - stayed away from cocaine though :D

Now on day 18. I've noticed my sex drive is much higher.
 
Day 19! One away from the big twenty.

I have another interview tomorrow and am meeting another recruitment company. So damn busy and so much prep work to do.

I have to go to the job centre now to prove I'm looking for jobs.
 
I kinda wish we had resources like that here im the states. Anyways, keep up the good work! Job seeking must provide you with a positive, healthy distraction from getting too bored with life.
 
Didn't get the job - might sound arrogant but I'm very shocked that they offered it to another candidate.

I have another interview tomorrow but getting frustrated, every single one takes 5 hours preparation, travel and going through a nervous situation.

Staying positive and avoiding drugs
 
So I got the other job and am still staying away from drugs. They are going to start paying me over $1000 dollars / £750 a week. Quite a lot of damn money but a very stressful job!

It's just gone by midnight so that's now day 23 off coke. Staying strong, just one week away from my aim of a month :)
 
Great news! Well done! Try to come up with a game plan now for how to manage the stress so you don't turn to substance. Good luck!
 
Indeed ^^ - first day of the job tomorrow and I'll no doubt be very nervous. Went out drinking on Sunday night and got horribly wasted and have complete memory loss.

On the good side however, no cocaine - today is day 25. Just 5 days away from my goal of one month.

10 days since I took that silly MDMA pill.
 
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