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Venting The Vent/Rant Thread Vs. You Silly KnuckleHeads Can Go Fly a Kite!!

I can be pretty mean when I'm being an 'asshole', especially when I'm discussing with my relatives or close friends of mine.
They say my words are pretty heavy and I should be careful before saying certain things.
During my childhood, my parents weren't easy to deal with and I'm 100% different when it comes to my own kids, I care a lot for them and their future. Now in regards to my relatives I'm simply too honest and too direct. That's how we are, how we were build to be with each other.
 
This is a minor issue compared with what some of you guys are going through. My family is very blue collar Philly types. Gregarious, rough and tumble lrish-American A-type personalities. At times I am like that also. But I love music, art and reading more than football.

I feel like I'm being judged for reading a book! My brother said "why are you studying?" ....What in the hell! I'm reading a book!

This issue runs deep for me because I remember as a kid feeling like I had to hide certain music I liked for fear of being judged. And reading Buddhism books in a Catholic household. Ugggh! Just let me live! I should be asking them why they're NOT reading books! Btw I love them and they are not malicious but I'm sure some of you know what I'm feeling here.
 
My husband also comes from a blue-collar background where he was openly ridiculed for reading studying etc but especially for wanting to go to college. That was all many years ago and he recognized that he was threatening to them (making it their problem, not his). Now, many years later the important relationships survived and the others faded away so....hang in there and stay true to yourself. Don't even bother justifying it or debating--just make a joke or brush it off and keep reading.<3
 
My boss is a clueless slave driver.

I worked in the sun all day yesterday in 103 degree weather doing things most would not, got sick as hell from the heat and needed to leave an hour early.

The guy actually gave me a hard time about it, I bust my ass everyday, I never get a thank you or good job, I get paid next to nothing.

I'm doing this for the experience, yet I'm learning nothing, I feel that they are purposely not teaching me anything, I hate my job and I'm just so sick of waking up.
 
Back at my routine at work, 10-12 hours a day and still a lot to do this evening at home.
This does not make me a good person outside of my work. Something in between bitterness together with tiredness and lack of inspiration.
I'm good at what I do and really enjoy being there while I am there but when I am out I am just worn out.
 
I hate the police. I hate probation. I hate the rain. I hate traffic. I hate waking up early. I hate out patient.
 
You're a worthless sack of shit. You don't deserve your job, you're lazy, and you insulted me. When I confronted you you still acted like an asshole even though I was being professional and had every right to be mad. My job is so goddamn important to me, and I can't fully explain the situation but I feel insulted, pissed, and quite frankly embarassed too.
 
I'm realizing that as old as we get younger people, especially our own children tend to give less credit to us as they believe we are obsolete comparing to their new and modern ideas that are empowered when they get together with friends. I feel I'm disappointed with myself but at the same time I'm trying to relate to my old self and trying to see that I was in a dark place. Way worse than what they are going through.

I just wonder if this is the beginning of a generation that does not appreciate or accept the ideas of older people. I don't feel I'm that old, but for them I am. They respect me, we have civilized argumentations. But I can clearly see that some of my relatives are so naive and can't see the obvious (of course it's obvious for me) but crystal clear for my wife as well, so it's not that I'm a lunatic. I'm just watching my hero dad years going away faster than I expected.
 
herbavore said:
My husband also comes from a blue-collar background where he was openly ridiculed for reading studying etc but especially for wanting to go to college. That was all many years ago and he recognized that he was threatening to them (making it their problem, not his). Now, many years later the important relationships survived and the others faded away so....hang in there and stay true to yourself. Don't even bother justifying it or debating--just make a joke or brush it off and keep reading.<3
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For sure!
Good advice. <3

I like to sum these things up with 'Fuck those bigoted, assholes' ;)

Herbivore, puts it far more eloquently, though. ;)
 
Erikmen said:
I'm realizing that as old as we get younger people, especially our own children tend to give less credit to us as they believe we are obsolete comparing to their new and modern ideas that are empowered when they get together with friends. I feel I'm disappointed with myself but at the same time I'm trying to relate to my old self and trying to see that I was in a dark place. Way worse than what they are going through.

I just wonder if this is the beginning of a generation that does not appreciate or accept the ideas of older people. I don't feel I'm that old, but for them I am. They respect me, we have civilized argumentations. But I can clearly see that some of my relatives are so naive and can't see the obvious (of course it's obvious for me) but crystal clear for my wife as well, so it's not that I'm a lunatic. I'm just watching my hero dad years going away faster than I expected.
Click to expand...
Keep it simple; focus on your kid;as an individual; s/he will be swayed by the forces of his generation/culture (every generation has its flaws and failings but also, some enlightenment, too) but all you can do is guide him to be his own, best self - that is your power, to help him be secure in himself - respect himself and others.
Good lesson to learn, eh!

Dad's ego needs to take a bruising; so that he can realise that he has to let go of controlling the situation in his favour<3
Your thoughts make sense - completely and are true - for sure but you got to own your own feelings and not project them on to your little one or their generational situation - stand back, give space and you will give the same to yourself, in turn - perspective and space to be yourself; thus empowered, in your perspective of whats happening with your kid.
So much pressure on parents and not enough decent advice and help, nowadays. Look after your thoughts, judgements and feelings, as you are
Obviously you love your 'Dad Hero' role and there is a lot of pressure with roles but it's more important to be yourself (and you seem like a lovely person;in time, your kid will appreciate it - believe me)- you are good enough - have faith in yourself, as a good, decent, DAD but more so, as a good, decent, person (the best people have lived life; have been to their dark-side and occasionally, need to visit it/face it - nobody is perfect - infact 'perfect people' are deranged; so take it easy on yourself where and when you need to and be hard on the things that need it but don't confuse the two). <3

You sound like a good Dad. ;) <3
 
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Thank you very much Asclepius.
That was a kind and wise post. Great advices, indeed! <3
I'll get there. :)
 
You ARE there. I am sorry to give advice/judgement because it's YOU that is living it and not, I - so you are really the one who knows what to do/not to, as the case may be.
Kudos, to you though - being a parent is intensely, hard and I have much respect.:|%)<3
 
I'm embarmrassed by what I have done. I have been stuck in a hospital for over a week and my hand is an embarrassment to me and to the scene. I will have a second hand surgery today or tomorrow, and will lose my right hand, ring finger tip it is black and my middle finger is getting black as well my hand hurts as hell.

Ouch.been in hospital over a week.
 
^I'm so sorry to hear that, I can't imagine how you are feeling but I trust that we adapt to most of situations in life and with you it won't be any different.
I wish you the strength to deal with your issues and for the best recovery you can get!

Asclepius said:
You ARE there. I am sorry to give advice/judgement because it's YOU that is living it and not, I - so you are really the one who knows what to do/not to, as the case may be.
Kudos, to you though - being a parent is intensely, hard and I have much respect.:|%)<3

Thank you Asclepius! :) <3
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woamotive said:
I'm embarmrassed by what I have done. I have been stuck in a hospital for over a week and my hand is an embarrassment to me and to the scene. I will have a second hand surgery today or tomorrow, and will lose my right hand, ring finger tip it is black and my middle finger is getting black as well my hand hurts as hell.

Ouch.been in hospital over a week.
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What happened? I'm so sorry. (((<3)))
 
Anyone got any good remedies for excrutiating toothache? I bust a tooth up good some time back and never got it fixed. It's playing up hellish today, can't see the dentist till Monday and I can't just take some painkillers like I used to. Trials of the ex-opehead.
 
I was exactly where you are few weeks ago. It turned out I had problems at the root of two teeth. And due to gritting habits others are also damaged. Dentists say that when things get to the point you are feeling pain, it normally means you need to treat it as soon as possible.

Actually, since I've become sober I realized that at every three months or so I discover there's something on me to be fixed regarding my health. It started with hormones, high blood pressure, stomach acute an chronic problems, tireoide levels. Even my levels of stress seems not be be regulated by my own defenses as it should. Although no one told me this, I feel that if I haven't stopped I'd probably have died much sooner, and the worst of all is that it would have been a very slow and painful death.

As it seems, our body can take a lot of punches everyday but after a certain point things get a bit harsh. A lot of people think they can go around that but it's indeed pretty difficult as you get old. Eventually, nothing really works and there's a moment that you simply can't take it anymore.
 
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Muzda Jonxx said:
Anyone got any good remedies for excrutiating toothache? I bust a tooth up good some time back and never got it fixed. It's playing up hellish today, can't see the dentist till Monday and I can't just take some painkillers like I used to. Trials of the ex-opehead.
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Muzda - there are a few emergency options you can buy at the drug store to help with the pain. One is a clove oil past that you can pack into the tooth. The other is ambesol (sp?) which is a topical anesthetic. Years ago I lost a filling in a back molar and didn't realize it and broke the tooth in half eating. The clove oil helped tremendously.

Erikmen said:
I was exactly where you are few weeks ago. It turned out I had problems at the root of two teeth. And due to gritting habits others are also damaged. Dentists say that when things get to the point you are feeling pain, it normally means you need to treat it as soon as possible.

Actually, since I've become sober I realized that at every three months or so I discover there's something on me to be fixed regarding my health. It started with hormones, high blood pressure, stomach acute an chronic problems, tireoide levels. Even my levels of stress seems not be be regulated by my own defenses as it should. Although no one told me this, I feel that if I haven't stopped I'd probably have died much sooner, and the worst of all is that it would have been a very slow and painful death.

As it seems, our body can take a lot of punches everyday but after a certain point things get a bit harsh. A lot of people think they can go around that but it's indeed pretty difficult as you get old. Eventually, nothing really works and there's a moment that you simply can't take it anymore.
Click to expand...

Erikmen I can certainly relate. Since I've gotten sober I've had a checklist of health issues I either need to get looked at or just tests to see what my lifestyle has damaged. Health wise I'm on the last item - GI issues. Chronic drinking does a number on the GI tract. I've had so many tests and they all come back fine I'm starting to get frustrated because I would like some answers.

I've saved the dentist for last. I know that's going to be an ongoing battle. I have always ground my teeth at night so there is damage but no pain so I procrastinate. I have such an irrational fear of dentists that I have put it off for years and have tried to maintain with self maintenance (brushing, flossing after every meal, etc). I'm going to start the dental journey in August and am so not looking forward to it :/

I've always been honest with my doctor about my lifestyle so lately I've been using lifestyle as an excuse to get preventative maintenance done early. Aging is tough - I'm hoping by doing maintenance early I won't have too many issues later.
 
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