Positive The Tapering Supportive/Social Thread

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Day four without pods is going well, such a difference to have bupe, even a low dose. Last time day four I was so ill I thought I'd never touch anything ever again, unable to function in any way other than to huddle in a duvet feeling shite, sweating buckets and bursting into tears if noone was about to bring me a glass of water.
This time I'm fine. I'm off work too, that helps. Last time I had to let people down with my self inflicted illness taking me over, that was stressful.
I'm dealing with cravings with gabapentin 100s. They are only 100mg each and there isn't an overdose danger so I'm just popping another couple with each craving or bad feeling. I'm slightly staggering, but my balance is usually a bit off, so nothing new there. I feel fully aware, soon fix that with a nice Kush 😂
Back to drinking kratom. I'll lay off the booze and benzos tonight, last night felt really weird.
I've had a couple of baclofen too, do they help with the leg kicks?
Glad to hear it's not too bad. And yes, baclofen is a very good muscle relaxer so it should help with the RLS.

Good on you girl. You are rockin' this WD. Happy New Year.
 
Day four without pods is going well, such a difference to have bupe, even a low dose. Last time day four I was so ill I thought I'd never touch anything ever again, unable to function in any way other than to huddle in a duvet feeling shite, sweating buckets and bursting into tears if noone was about to bring me a glass of water.
This time I'm fine. I'm off work too, that helps. Last time I had to let people down with my self inflicted illness taking me over, that was stressful.
I'm dealing with cravings with gabapentin 100s. They are only 100mg each and there isn't an overdose danger so I'm just popping another couple with each craving or bad feeling. I'm slightly staggering, but my balance is usually a bit off, so nothing new there. I feel fully aware, soon fix that with a nice Kush 😂
Back to drinking kratom. I'll lay off the booze and benzos tonight, last night felt really weird.
I've had a couple of baclofen too, do they help with the leg kicks?
Try baclofen for RLS.It could helps you.Pregabaline is good also for "leg kicks".Theres a good strains of Kratom,but even from the same provider theres difference in potency between the batches.May be over a period of months kratom looses part of his qualities.But if you find your proper strain and provider Kratom is sufficient to me to supress withdrawl from pods and after a days even feel better.Good luck,be safe and happy New Year!(here after less than two hours).
 
If I make it through this time, I might just find another way to deal with life for a while. Its new years eve and I'm going to bed before anyone realises just how fucked up I am and I want to but I can't. I'm choosing this and I want yo be choosing people instead, but somehow I can't.
Having said all that and I feel guilty and all but I am going to have a fine time here with my music and my comfort meds. It's not all bad.
Happy new year, very soon
 
M
Yeah my current average is probably 1 poop every 2 weeks. The flushing method doesn't work for me. The 1st out the shoot is almost always the biggest, most cloggy one. In the house, I'm pretty much resigned to carrying in the plunger, Sometimes even that's not good enough and I have to use the snake.
My record was 14 days between bowel movements. I’m a handy guy (plumbing, electrical, auto repair, etc). My best story was finally going poop after about 2 weeks at 3am. My little house has only one toilet and I murdered it so badly that after an hour with the plunger and another 30 minutes with a snake I finally gave up and unbolted the toilet. I had to carry it through the kitchen, outside to the grass, and run the hose backwards up through the bottom. That got the ‘loose’ particles out. Then I had to .... ummm.... ‘manually’ remove the softball sized log by hand. All of this about a week after my last back surgery, still with staples in my back just so the only toilet would be functional when my family woke up.

Arguably in the top 10 disgusting things I have done in my life
 
B
If I make it through this time, I might just find another way to deal with life for a while. Its new years eve and I'm going to bed before anyone realises just how fucked up I am and I want to but I can't. I'm choosing this and I want yo be choosing people instead, but somehow I can't.
Having said all that and I feel guilty and all but I am going to have a fine time here with my music and my comfort meds. It's not all bad.
Best decision I ever made was to cone clean to my wife. The guilt was my rock bottom. Now I can’t hide my use as easily and it’s easier to ask for help.

Somehow I use a lot more when I have already lied. My mind says “Well, since I’m going to hell anyway, might as well enjoy the ride!”. Since I stopped lying (almost), I cheat a LOT less.
 
The best time to quit is right now. Not after the New Year. Not when this one runs out. And definitely not “If she catches me AGAIN”. I made plans to do better a thousand times. And tomorrow is always the busiest day of the year.
 
WE HAVE TO KEEP GOING. EVEN WHEN IT'S SCARY, EVEN WHEN ALL OF OUR STRENGTH SEEMS GONE, WE HAVE TO KEEP PICKING OURSELVES BACK UP AND MOVING FORWARD, BECAUSE WHATEVER WE'RE BATTLING IN THE MOMENT, IT WILL PASS, AND WE WILL MAKE IT THROUGH. WE'VE MADE IT THIS FAR. WE CAN MAKE IT THROUGH WHATEVER COMES NEXT.

🖤💜🖤




 
B

Best decision I ever made was to cone clean to my wife. The guilt was my rock bottom. Now I can’t hide my use as easily and it’s easier to ask for help.

Somehow I use a lot more when I have already lied. My mind says “Well, since I’m going to hell anyway, might as well enjoy the ride!”. Since I stopped lying (almost), I cheat a LOT less.
My husband knows I use a lot of substances including opiates but I'm not telling everyone, none of their business.
 
WE HAVE TO KEEP GOING. EVEN WHEN IT'S SCARY, EVEN WHEN ALL OF OUR STRENGTH SEEMS GONE, WE HAVE TO KEEP PICKING OURSELVES BACK UP AND MOVING FORWARD, BECAUSE WHATEVER WE'RE BATTLING IN THE MOMENT, IT WILL PASS, AND WE WILL MAKE IT THROUGH. WE'VE MADE IT THIS FAR. WE CAN MAKE IT THROUGH WHATEVER COMES NEXT.

🖤💜🖤
Believe it or not... After I made it through a couple of rough months running out of my prescription and discovered I wasn’t going to die, I got good at just reminding myself that I did it before and I can do it again. There were plenty of times that I felt like death and I just wanted to beat the universe to the punchline, but I made it by reminding myself that I had lived through it before.

The only way to lose is to die.
 
Try baclofen for RLS.It could helps you.Pregabaline is good also for "leg kicks".Theres a good strains of Kratom,but even from the same provider theres difference in potency between the batches.May be over a period of months kratom looses part of his qualities.But if you find your proper strain and provider Kratom is sufficient to me to supress withdrawl from pods and after a days even feel better.Good luck,be safe and happy New Year!(here after less than two hours).
I have used the same website for my Kratom for a few years now. I buy in huge quantities (like 5 kilos at a time), so it sits in my cupboard for months at a time and never goes bad or loses potency. It is however an un-altered piece of a plant. I have noticed that the flavor and strength can vary up to about 25% difference between batches. And depending on the time of year and the climate in Indonesia, it can vary quite a bit. If you’re buying capsules at the gas station, it’s very possible that they mowed the lawn and ‘cut’ the Kratom with grass clippings. At tgat point you’re at the mercy of the guy who packed it.

It’s like an orange: Picked early, picked late, from the tree in the front yard versus the tree out in the back. You can get sweet, sour, lots of seeds, no seeds, thick skin, thin skin. Etc.
 
M

My record was 14 days between bowel movements. I’m a handy guy (plumbing, electrical, auto repair, etc). My best story was finally going poop after about 2 weeks at 3am. My little house has only one toilet and I murdered it so badly that after an hour with the plunger and another 30 minutes with a snake I finally gave up and unbolted the toilet. I had to carry it through the kitchen, outside to the grass, and run the hose backwards up through the bottom. That got the ‘loose’ particles out. Then I had to .... ummm.... ‘manually’ remove the softball sized log by hand. All of this about a week after my last back surgery, still with staples in my back just so the only toilet would be functional when my family woke up.

Arguably in the top 10 disgusting things I have done in my life
Sounds like a case of needing to line the toilet with a plastic bag then lift it out and somehow get it to the bin without being seen 😳
 
I have used the same website for my Kratom for a few years now. I buy in huge quantities (like 5 kilos at a time), so it sits in my cupboard for months at a time and never goes bad or loses potency. It is however an un-altered piece of a plant. I have noticed that the flavor and strength can vary up to about 25% difference between batches. And depending on the time of year and the climate in Indonesia, it can vary quite a bit. If you’re buying capsules at the gas station, it’s very possible that they mowed the lawn and ‘cut’ the Kratom with grass clippings. At tgat point you’re at the mercy of the guy who packed it.

It’s like an orange: Picked early, picked late, from the tree in the front yard versus the tree out in the back. You can get sweet, sour, lots of seeds, no seeds, thick skin, thin skin. Etc.
It's not bad stuff, the one I bought anyway. They advised 5g as a dose but that doesn't do anything if you've opiate tolerance. Double it and it is helping with wds but nothing more. Do you drink the sludge or filter it?
The first couple of cups I strained it like pods tea or coffee, but emailing the company they said not to filter.
 
It's not bad stuff, the one I bought anyway. They advised 5g as a dose but that doesn't do anything if you've opiate tolerance. Double it and it is helping with wds but nothing more. Do you drink the sludge or filter it?
The first couple of cups I strained it like pods tea or coffee, but emailing the company they said not to filter.
I do the spoon and gag method. That’s where you spoon around 5 grams directly into your mouth, add water, swallow, and then desperately try not to puke it all over the kitchen.

You need to ingest all of the powder. A lot of people make “tea” but it’s really soup. They boil whole/unfiltered Kratom and drink it all. And be careful of taking too much. A Kratom overdose only means nausea, but it still sucks throwing up.

You’re right. For someone who has never used opiates, Kratom can cause a buzz. But for those of us with even a mild opiate tolerance, Kratom won’t get you high. And regular Kratom use will significantly raise normal opiate tolerance.
 
It's not bad stuff, the one I bought anyway. They advised 5g as a dose but that doesn't do anything if you've opiate tolerance. Double it and it is helping with wds but nothing more. Do you drink the sludge or filter it?
The first couple of cups I strained it like pods tea or coffee, but emailing the company they said not to filter.
5g is a pretty large dose. My guess is most of your Kratom stayed in the filter. When you find a method that has you ingesting all of it, definitely don’t start with mioe than 5 grams.

10 grams would make most folks puke.
 
Sounds like a case of needing to line the toilet with a plastic bag then lift it out and somehow get it to the bin without being seen 😳
Tried that one too. No matter how many layers of plastic bags I put around it, two days later the odor was so strong in my trash can that the whole driveway smelled like shit. I got a real appreciation for the guy who vacuums out the portable toilets on construction sites.
 
5g is a pretty large dose. My guess is most of your Kratom stayed in the filter. When you find a method that has you ingesting all of it, definitely don’t start with mioe than 5 grams.

10 grams would make most folks puke.
I only filtered it on day 1&2 by then they'd emailed me back about not filtering when I'd asked.
I found 5g nice to start, just a gentle buzz. I find it OK to eat. I make a paste and eat it or add hot water to the paste. I have a cup of warm water as well to rinse my mouth. So one sip of kratom then one sip of water quickly after. It's the texture I don't like, the grittiness.
Today I started with 5g, then 2g of a different strain, by lunchtime I was going for a walk and had another quick 5g before I went. I was possibly attributing the way I've no nausea to either gabapentin or kratom. But each of them cause nausea on their own.
Anyway I've zero withdrawal symptoms so I don't know what is going on. About 2g gabapentin and a very nice bowl of green on top of the kratom. No food yet, it's 4.30pm, I'm making soup so I'll eat soon. I'm fully functional and by this time last time I was ill so bad I wondered was it causing permanent damage. No jaundice this time because no dehydration. Much better for my health.

Will kratom or gabapentin give physical withdrawal symptoms or is it more a mindfuck when I taper off them?
 
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I have used the same website for my Kratom for a few years now. I buy in huge quantities (like 5 kilos at a time), so it sits in my cupboard for months at a time and never goes bad or loses potency. It is however an un-altered piece of a plant. I have noticed that the flavor and strength can vary up to about 25% difference between batches. And depending on the time of year and the climate in Indonesia, it can vary quite a bit. If you’re buying capsules at the gas station, it’s very possible that they mowed the lawn and ‘cut’ the Kratom with grass clippings. At tgat point you’re at the mercy of the guy who packed it.

It’s like an orange: Picked early, picked late, from the tree in the front yard versus the tree out in the back. You can get sweet, sour, lots of seeds, no seeds, thick skin, thin skin. Etc.
Never used to buy from gas station.Here is illegal.After one year most of the dried leafs and stems,mushrooms,if are not stored properly loose their potency significantly.Probably more of the Kratom is no more than few months old.Better to have my kratom groove by my side and just go there,pick fresh leaves and chew.(if i lived in Indochina)
 
I may be delusional (in fact all those fleeting shadows at the edge of my vision, the rain or washing machine sounding like I left music on somewhere, that's already delusional I guess).
So this may be crap, but every time I try, I'm getting closer to that goal of doing what my doctor approves of. Taking my meds as advised and not sourcing my own "better" ones.

Fuck my ear hurts so bad without opies other than my patch which is only about half a mg of bupe a day. If I say it's not working they gonna switch me to fentanyl, don't think that would help my overall situation. I got April now to aim for, the trip got postponed. Didn't have to be but when it was suggested to me I jumped at the postponement, I need more time to do this, I'm slowly getting there in my own stop-start way.
I want to spend time with people, I think I miss people. I been avoiding spending more than a few moments with anyone other than my husband because they would know there's something not right, but actually that's more weed than opiates and I've not tackled that one yet.
Maybe just let the weed run out and not replenish?
Then I don't need to think about it.
I just thought about it and I don't like the idea at all.
I'll stick to tackling pods first.

Day six and I feel like the remains of the pods are leaving my system from the top down, like a glass starting to empty, my head has cleared significantly which is weird feeling because on pods my head is clearer than ever, but this is a natural clear I guess it's better.
My body is feeling bad still, but things are starting to balance better. I'll start reducing the comfort meds, slowly, very slowly or I'll relapse if experience is anything to go by.
And I retrieved two small sacks of pods, 5kg total, from where they been already before the summer brought fresh ones.
Not great timing, but they needed moved before they got damp.
How long do pods last? These must be 2020 harvest at best, but I dipped into them at christmas and they are still good.
 
I only filtered it on day 1&2 by then they'd emailed me back about not filtering when I'd asked.
I found 5g nice to start, just a gentle buzz. I find it OK to eat. I make a paste and eat it or add hot water to the paste. I have a cup of warm water as well to rinse my mouth. So one sip of kratom then one sip of water quickly after. It's the texture I don't like, the grittiness.
Today I started with 5g, then 2g of a different strain, by lunchtime I was going for a walk and had another quick 5g before I went. I was possibly attributing the way I've no nausea to either gabapentin or kratom. But each of them cause nausea on their own.
Anyway I've zero withdrawal symptoms so I don't know what is going on. About 2g gabapentin and a very nice bowl of green on top of the kratom. No food yet, it's 4.30pm, I'm making soup so I'll eat soon. I'm fully functional and by this time last time I was ill so bad I wondered was it causing permanent damage. No jaundice this time because no dehydration. Much better for my health.

Will kratom or gabapentin give physical withdrawal symptoms or is it more a mindfuck when I taper off them?
Gabapentin is much more of a scrambled brains situation. Kratom is closer to a mild opiate withdrawal: little bit of psychological wds, little bit of physical wds.

Unless you have a need and a strong support system at home, I definitely recommend taclking one at a time. If the psychological wd’s from Gabapentin hit you extra hard AND the Kratom wd’s cause you insomnia, you might commit suicide by day 3. Don’t try it unless you’re OK with and prepared to jump off the wagon. I only say this because I have withdrawn from both separately and it’s not fun. I can’t imagine a ‘worst case scenario’ if you throw everything away and go cold turkey.
 
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