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Positive The Tapering Supportive/Social Thread

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Shady's Fox said:
this community failed to know what an antibiotic is. Just bc u need to say it over and over it proves even more so further, guilty conscious // heavy disease nowadays. Anyhow, I feel a lot better since I can sleep on the other unswollen cheek now ( left side ) and I ate a vanilla baguette, soft foods though. I don't go over board rn bc the gland is still swollen and it can irritate easily, I just needed to eat some sweet after these days of being on rag. I also ate some non heavy seasoned snitzel, not the whole just half.
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I'd be interested in seeing your source on how NSAIDs are antibiotic. The closest thing I can find is an article from 7 years ago stating that they might have antibacterial properties.

 
Maybe a different use of the words in that country? In the States an antibiotic means it kills bacteria. Nothing more.
 
Squeaky said:
If Google is correct (they do get it wrong occasionally), ketoprofen sounds like something to avoid. Not that I would pass it up if it worked. The list of warnings sound like one good overdose and you’re screwed for good. It’s prescription only in the US, maybe for a good reason.

I always wondered why Tylenol (paracetamol for those in the UK) is so easy to get, and in such large quantities. One big overdose causes permanent and fatal liver damage 100% of the time. And it’s a horrible and slow death. With all of the stuff that is ‘controlled’, and the number of deaths from Tylenol overdose each year, it feels like the government should at least put the same kind of warning on the bottle that they put on a pack of cigarettes.
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And that is NO SHIT!
I am a living survivor of Tylenol overdose with fatal liver failure.
For some reason I am still alive- kind of.
 
I saw something new yesterday. After over 100 days off oxycodone, I am no longer dying when the weather is too hot or too cold. For the 5 years I was on opiates, every day was like Goldilocks and and the 3 bears. Too hot, too cold, or just too damn humid. I was constantly putting on a jacket or standing in front of the air conditioner when everyone else seemed fine. I would sweat buckets if the temp was one degree over 75F and shivering if it was one degree below. And I was a walking puddle if the humidity was higher than “just dry”. Even at night with the a/c set to arctic freeze I would be kicking off the covers to dry off and 2 minutes later I would be shivering and damp.
I just kept saying it’s part of getting old. Especially after 2 months clean it really felt like that was just my life now. I had quit complaining about the weather and was dressing in layers. But even then I spent a lot of time taking a layer off to go outside and putting one on to be indoors.

I’d like to beat the crap out of my Dr for saying the wd’s will be gone after a week. I don’t get all conspiracy theory on big Pharma engineering something so addictive and debilitating, but those bastards have to know that a month without pills will make you think that whatever is still sucking must be real pain even though it takes months to years to get your life back. It feels like it will be more than a year before I feel ‘normal’.

Good thing I have BlueLight to go back and read my posts. My guess is I will return to prescription pain killers someday. Hopefully I can remember all of this and not step in shit next time.
 
hylite said:
I have tapered but not quit yet ! 🍄🌶
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It's so hard to jump off that cliff even after tapering, I got to week three, then went crying to my doctor for an increased buprenorphine patch that I'll probably stay on forever now.
I'm very happy with that improvement in my useage, clean, legal and I know what is in it.
You guys who can quit completely are amazingly strong, admirable (although public perception might be otherwise).
 
I made it so far 6 days today from opioids with the exception of kratom one bad night. I used ice which it can take care of most of the w/d in high enough doses. BUTTTT....

# Don't do this #

All said and done it was not the greatest idea in the world. Idea was to be able to still work. 5 days awake - a couple 2 hour naps - little food.... to say the least I looked bugged out at work all week and last day agreeing to cover a shift then hour later saying I couldnt. Aggression. Irritable the last day.
Also ended in chest pains, dizziness,spots in vision and fear of death that still hasn't totally dissipated because my chest still hurts ( I think I was close to serious medical problem.... apparently I am not 20 anymore) So while this took care of withdrawal it took me right to the edge of the abyss....
I am determined to stop the opioid use tho.... almost killed me trying to get off them.....I am pot committed now. 🤠
 
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Dundermifflin,
You’re going to get there. The journey is 10x longer and 100x more difficult than you thought, but you sound exactly like I did a year ago. I spent a lot of time in the last 3years being mad at myself for being so weak/stupid/addicted.

I’m starting to think the first week or two of wd’s is actually the easiest. I went through it dozens of times so I can honestly say it probably sucks more than death. But somehow it seems to be easier to focus on vomiting and diarrhea than it is to battle depression. AND the acute withdrawal stage is well documented, so its easier to tell yourself it will be over soon. The PAWS starts to feel endless after a while.
 
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SteeleyJ said:
I made it so far 6 days today from opioids with the exception of kratom one bad night. I used ice which it can take care of most of the w/d in high enough doses. BUTTTT....

# Don't do this #

All said and done it was not the greatest idea in the world. Idea was to be able to still work. 5 days awake - a couple 2 hour naps - little food.... to say the least I looked bugged out at work all week and last day agreeing to cover a shift then hour later saying I couldnt. Aggression. Irritable the last day.
Also ended in chest pains, dizziness,spots in vision and fear of death that still hasn't totally dissipated because my chest still hurts ( I think I was close to serious medical problem.... apparently I am not 20 anymore) So while this took care of withdrawal it took me right to the edge of the abyss....
I am determined to stop the opioid use tho.... almost killed me trying to get off them.....I am pot committed now. 🤠
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Stay strong. You’re almost past the worst part. The fact you went to work means you’re tough. Just don’t give up unless you’re ready to be dependent for life.
 
hylite said:
I'm going to have to look this up (( again. ))
Or I will just have to depend on kratom and weed (( now known as flower ))

thanxxx !!!

hurts my head just thinking about having to have to resort to kratom some day. Again.
I tried it once or twice and it didn't agree with me too well. I can't jump or ever want to but I made it one whole year one time, at least.

and working through the depression.
☺👍🏼🕊
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Remember how it felt after that year. You somehow decided it wouldn’t be a problem. You started up again and you felt pretty good. At some point you realized you messed up and you were hooked again. There was a point when you could see that the whole year just got flushed down the toilet and you were going to go through it all again.
Focus on that particular moment and keep reminding yourself how you felt. Sad, hopeless, stupid..... it doesn’t matter. If you hold onto that feeling it will hopefully give you some energy to push forward, and maybe never find yourself here again.
 
Squeaky said:
Stay strong. You’re almost past the worst part. The fact you went to work means you’re tough. Just don’t give up unless you’re ready to be dependent for life.
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Thank you for encouraging words. Yeah I generally feel okay now..... happy even just to feel normal and thinking straight after food and rest. And yeah that's how I've felt about this..... if I don't stop this thing will be forever and might kill me someday.
 
I noticed my nose stopped running too. Maybe 2 months or so after I quit, my perpetual runny nose that plagued me for a couple of years just dried up. For a long time I assumed it was allergies. Guess it was just opiates.
 
Squeaky said:
I noticed my nose stopped running too. Maybe 2 months or so after I quit, my perpetual runny nose that plagued me for a couple of years just dried up. For a long time I assumed it was allergies. Guess it was just opiates.
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I find the opposite. I've had a runny nose my whole life, dust allergy is my best guess.
Whatever causes it, more opiates stop it, less opiates bring it back. Wd? Omg, the snot!
 
SteeleyJ said:
Thank you for encouraging words. Yeah I generally feel okay now..... happy even just to feel normal and thinking straight after food and rest. And yeah that's how I've felt about this..... if I don't stop this thing will be forever and might kill me someday.
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It feels so much better to be in control of it, not controlled by it. It's hard to keep it that way when depression creeps in. I just keep reminding myself...
Before I quit, I started writing notes to myself. Sober me in the morning would make a list of what I couldn't forget about today, then I'd hand over to opiate brain who would write notes back about how things looked from there. It was all getting a bit crazy, it was time to find my way home
 
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