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The Sobriety Thread

Now on 3+ weeks totally 100% sober - - it actually feels really good. Plus I have gained 7-8 pound which is a good thing - was getting a little too thin. I have been keeping very busy - no time for drugs. May decide to party again this weekend or may keep going a few more weeks. At least I broke that cycle of getting fucked up almost every weekend.
 
just made the 4-month mark in my sobriety!...still have 8 more months to go.
All in all, i guess it's not too bad, but i do miss some things about using, but i definitely don't miss being an addict...
 
Been COMPLETELY sober since I got arrested for poseesion of .2 grams heroin, 1 pill MDMA, .5 grams weed, and a needle on SEPT 19 while on a shit load of xanax baked and I had just shot up 6 bags of smack cooked with methadone 9which gets me higher casue i dont normally take methadone). I got out on house arrest on OCT 10 but I am stuck at my parents house where I am not allowed to do drugs and I have NO money to send someone out to get me anything anyways. IT IS DEFENITLY A FORCED SOBERITY. I still have all of the underlying issues that i escape from while using drugs but now I dont have my coping mechanism (drugs) nor do I have the means to seek any kind of help seeing that Im on house arrest and in debt.
In the past I have been ober for 2 and a half months in 2005 (the 1st time a went to rehab, outpatient and after care to avoid prison time on a violation of probation), then about 4 months later in 2005 (while in a 90 rehab in Cook county jail cause i violated my probation again) and in 2 and half moths 2006 (while i was in prison for possession). These were also forced soberity but this one seems to be the roughest for a few reasons. First is that it is getting harder to get myshit together and it seems overwhelming because I am now 28, I am looking at 2 class 4 felony charges, when I get done with my sentence I need to get a job (perferably a career), get a car, find a place of my own in a reasonable time, find some new people to hang with, and become more focused on my creative ventures such as writing and music stuff. Also the options are limited seeing as how after totally giving them more then a fair shot and researching heavily I totally disagree with 12-step programs and could go on for pages why but will not bore everyone and I dont have the money to see a psychiatrist or psycologist about underlying issues of depression and anxiety. And the hardest thing is that drugs have become very ingrained into my life that they are my catalyst for entertainment, my main form of escape, and a freind when there is no oned else who understands.
I defenitly am done with xanax for good (it always gets me in trouble) and I am going to do my best to steer clear of opiates but I still have a stronger desire to do drugs. I seem to be happiest when I just smoke weed, do halucinogenes, and stay focused on keeping my priorities straight and I do this well as long as I stay away from heroin and other life consuming drugs. I might have to wait until I have my life more together and prioritized before i even start doing any again as a percausion and mayber by that point I wont want to anymore The thing is that I just have to use moderation and do them for the right reason and not just to escape from reality cause the longer you run away from situations the worse they are when you return. I know what I have to do to straighten my life out but the hard part is doing those things and finding a balance that works in a functional yet enjoyable way.
sorry if I ramble too much.. I just have alot on my mind and it helps for me to let it out
 
There's a new theory about depression being caused by the new convenience of everything - nuking meals, instant communication, gratification. It all takes effort exerted on complex tasks involving your hands out of the equation, and your natural reward pathways are undercut. A strong sense of well being is dependant on these pathways

I think this applies to instant gratification involving drugs, as well. Depression rates are continually rising, despite more and more people on antidepressants. The chemical imbalance of serotonin is not all of the equation, as much as drug companies want us to think it is

ps i'm not a crack pot conspiracy theorist, I've had to research drug marketing and ethics as part of my med degree :P
 
I want to want to be sober, and soon it will be involuntary soberness. My reason for getting scripts is about to be fixed and I'm not willing to acquire meds on the street. So I have to get to where I really want it to happen very soon. Damn Doctor went and fixed my pain with surgery and now I'm fine. But now I'm left with obsessing over not having any oxycodone or vicodin access and I"m freaking out. Why couldn't my DOC be somethign easy to get like alcohol? I know that sounds stupid, and I need to stay off opiates but I don't wanna. I love them.
IF anyone that knows about Suboxone and could describe it to me please PM me. I may have to go that route very shortly
 
I want to want to be sober, and soon it will be involuntary soberness. My reason for getting scripts is about to be fixed and I'm not willing to acquire meds on the street. So I have to get to where I really want it to happen very soon. Damn Doctor went and fixed my pain with surgery and now I'm fine. But now I'm left with obsessing over not having any oxycodone or vicodin access and I"m freaking out. Why couldn't my DOC be somethign easy to get like alcohol? I know that sounds stupid, and I need to stay off opiates but I don't wanna. I love them.
IF anyone that knows about Suboxone and could describe it to me please PM me. I may have to go that route very shortly
 
I might have to wait until I have my life more together and prioritized before i even start doing any again as a percausion
Click to expand...

If you get your life together the last thing that would help keep it that way are drugs that seem to have been dragging you down for years. Maybe this isn't your bottom but hopefully you hit it soon, the story you told was a really sad one
 
What a FEAT! Congrats blondie.

Anyway, i feel this is the thread i need to rant in... so read whoever is bored/ cares, skip if you don't

I was once crazy in highschool.

Rolled twice a week every week, tripped every week, smoked every day, drank every week. Banged H every day.

It was a crazy routine. Arrested wiith 15 E's while barred out on xanax. That stopped my E/ Cid binge, as my parents got me a good lawyer and i got on probation.

Overdosed on H, near death, made me quit H....

Now i roll once every few months. I LOVE smoking weed, something that has been part of my life since i was 14 (20 now). and I drink ( university).

Because of my probation, i can smoke weed maybe 1 week outta the month... and yeah im sorry weed isn't addictive... BUT I LOVE WEED. I LOVE HOW IT SMELLS TASTES. I LOVE THE HIGH. I LOVE IT SO MUCH.

i don't think i'm addicted, i've been on the routine of smoking one week outta the month for the last year... but when i cant smoke... i just would love to fire up the bong and just take that hit. and i CAN"T because of these RANDOM UAs.

So i drink every day now... i drink to fill the void of smoking... and i don't even like drinking... sad ain't it...

Im sober off cannabis... and all other things.. and i've picked up alcohol and its a substance I don't even like. :(
 
Soon will be 2 months of sobriety for me...after about 1yr of H addiction.
I take 1mg of sub everyday. I use to take all kinds of drugs, pretty much tried everything but now I dislike all drugs other than strong opiates which I guess is good and bad depending how u look like at it.

In the beginning dope made me feel great but took all my motivation for life. I quit my job of 2 yrs cuz I was falling asleep at the microscope (sometimes even snoring, lol).

What made/helped me quit was suboxone as w/ds were one of the biggest obstacles to quitting, my husband quitting and being adamant about H sobriety, my mom and slowly running out of money which made me realize I'm not going to sell my body or belongings for drugs and I'm not going to end up on the street. Wouldn't be worth it.

I feel better everyday as I only have about 2 months sobriety. I have a great support network of people who are motivating me to stay sober. My best friend of 13 years has been sober from dope for 2 yrs and we recently started talking. She understands me the most. I have a great marriage and have lots of education ahead of me.

Life is so much better sober than on dope even thou I have a history of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and depression. I was pressured by my sub doc to go on anti depressants but chose exercise/diet change instead.
 
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Been on oxycontin, for lets says 2 months. last month has been everyday use =[ plus smoking weed and drinking on the weekends!

But i am trading 80mg of oxy for 4 8mg suboxone. Hopefully get past those first 72 hours of withdrawls no problem (:

Wish me luck!
 
to be honest your not in for much pain, 2 months is a short time.. i'd just take 2mg twice for two days (morning and night) and then 2mg for 4 days then 1mg for 4 days, then 1mg every other day til you runout. I'd really doubt physical addiction is whats going to be any of the problem for you if you have one
 
OK - lots of vodka and crack the last two weeks and now it is time for a stretch of sobriety. I may try to go until after Christmas which means over a month with no partying. Of course if I hook up with some meth over Thanksgiving weekend I may party some but either starting now or starting next week will probably go a month sober. Time to save some money, put on some weight and catch up on sleep.
 
I'm on probation right now and they're drug testing me even though my charges aren't drug related which is some bullshit but that's the way it is, so I can no longer smoke weed I can indulge in other drugs but its been a thing i've only done a few handful of times since i've gotten on probation, im scripted xanax and thats been my DOC, luckily i have a fucked up knee and get scripted painkillers too so i can do heroin or w/e

But as far as coke and crack go, im very proud of myself i havent touched either one of those drugs since earlier january!!! ( after 4 years of almost daily use )
 
I haven't rolled in over a month and I have no desire to. I love ecstasy. But--this may sound pathetic--but I'm going to say it anyways! >_< My last...maybe 5 or so rolls were with this guy I was seeing....and I feel like if I roll again...I'm just going to be reminded of what it was like with him. He obviously left me. And that's going to result in a shitty roll. Hopefully when I'm completely over him, I can roll again.
 
I'm about to be sober for like 3 months. Got caught with some shit, got put on probation and as a condition of that i gotta go to a 3 month once a week treatment deal. Well, they test you randomly at this place so i can't really use. I could use if i really wanted to cause it's only once a week and they'd never make you piss on a day other than your one day a week that you go...so it'd be easy to use shit and not get caught.

But i figure i'll just do it legit, no sense in gettin a bad review from the program cause i pissed dirty. If I get a favorable release i could have my case closed and be totally off probation, otherwise it goes on for another year.

The sobriety itself doesn't bother me...im just so fucking bored all the time i could kill someone. :| My job is sorta seasonal so in the last week it has slowed down a fuckload...had a bunch of free time and nothing to do with it. Sure i can keep myself occupied for like 20 min blocks of time doing various things, but for every 20 mins im doing something im spending 5-10 mins thinking about gettin some booze or some pills or trippin or somethin. Then I distract myself again.

My longest period of sobriety before this was like 4 and a half months. The only thing sobriety teaches me is that I can't ever be completely sober forever, and if I thought that that was a reality, like if some shit went down where i'd never have a psychoactive again, i'd undoubtedly kill myself after some time. It's not that being sober sucks, it just sucks to be it all the time. I wouldn't wanna be fucked up all the time—why would I want to be sober all the time? Where's the variety? I can have a few drinks for like 2 or 3 nights in a row and then not think about it for a month, or i can abstain and think about it every other night. Which is really more healthy?

This, of course, is a period of forced sobriety, and that type is always worse. I don't mind taking it easy for several weeks if I feel like it, but when external circumstances dictate that I stay sober, the whole ordeal is much more uncomfortable. It's basically jail of the mind. :!
 
sober from oxycontin since last tuesday, went on a hydrocodone binge yesterday(saturday), just cause it was availabe.

My suboxone makes me physically ill. I take it around 7pm cause thats usually when i do my Oxy.

I feel fine, but when i wake up im dizzy, feel like im about to yak, and have super bad migraines. Its keeping me sober, but bed ridden at the same time. Why?!

Unfortuanetly last night, while eating ceral, and pretty much nodding from my Hydro. I look across the table, and guess what i see? A nice 20mg of oxy just sitting there, calling my name.

I feel like going back to my oxy, but i know i wont be able to control it.

Someone help? suggestions?
 
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mmmCHRISx said:
sober from oxycontin since last tuesday, went on a hydrocodone binge yesterday(saturday), just cause it was availabe.

My suboxone makes me physically ill. I take it around 7pm cause thats usually when i do my Oxy.

I feel fine, but when i wake up im dizzy, feel like im about to yak, and have super bad migraines. Its keeping me sober, but bed ridden at the same time. Why?!

Unfortuanetly last night, while eating ceral, and pretty much nodding from my Hydro. I look across the table, and guess what i see? A nice 20mg of oxy just sitting there, calling my name.

I feel like going back to my oxy, but i know i wont be able to control it.

Someone help? suggestions?
Click to expand...

The first week or so suboxone was making me sick also. I had bad headaches, stomachaches, nausea...it was no fun. I hated life, wanted to go back to my old stuff cuz I never had physical pain before. But I just waited it out and it got better after a while. Still sub is much better than w/d even with the pain I experienced. If ur in the beginnings of ur sub therapy just wait it out, it'll be worth it. I feel great now, so much better than my old doped out self.
 
Im saving the rest, i still have 10mgs or so. since i got past that first 3 days, i can control my use, never going back to using more then 2 days in a row.
 
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