Buzz Lightbeer
Bluelight Crew
Man, that's an insane story, have you tried 5-MeO-DMT again since then?Mind you this was 10 years ago so I was an arrogant 19 year old that thought he was some enlightened shaman and Terence Mckenna all rolled into one. I got a brilliant idea to do some 5-meo-dmt whilst peaking on 25mg of 2c-e to achieve a state "ego death" cause I was such a tough badass. I probably insufflated 40mg+ or so and I knew within seconds I was fucked and then utter hell ensued. I recall running out of my room as it was all coming on (The body load was like weight of the world imploding) towards the kitchen where my little brother was, screaming I'm dying and I'm dying. At that point I went completely catatonic and according to my brother I was speaking in tongues, hiding under tables and then standing up knocking them over. I Didn't know what, where, when, who anything was. 5-meo-dmt is an odd beast because its not visual, it was just straight into the void or the bardo. It's beyond definition, but I was reduced to nothing and everything simultaneously as I was being pulled across all of space and time. 2c-e is not very safe to mix with other substances let alone in this manner, so I may have died if little brother didn't call the ambulance and tell them I ingested psychs. I remember returning to my body for a second to find myself strapped to a gurney like a mad man with paramedics surrounding me and then I'd fly off the handle again, leave this world and go psychotic. I believe they were able to administer something because the excursions from reality and my surroundings started to lessen in intensity as I made my way back into my body.
I can't even begin to convey the level of fear, panic, and sheer insanity that I experienced. It was shattering and traumatic. I finally started to come around 6 hours later after doctors administered more medication, but I still have this sensation as if I never made it back to baseline. I already had a preexisting anxiety/panic disorder, but I believe this event amplified those problems 100x fold. I was tripping and having an exquisite time on just the 2c-e, but my arrogance knew no bounds back then. I've had no problems with eating tons of acid and smoking copious amounts of n n-dmt, before and since, but this was a different deal. A few years later a had another accidental overdose on a phenethylamine, but that's a different story and was due to being shipped the wrong compound, so at least it wasn't completely through my sheer stupidity. You live and you learn.
Ego death achieved.
Ime 5-MeO-DMT is quite visual though, but I haven't gone above 8mg smoked and 15mg insufflated. Didn't understand a thing about both experiences, weird drug at those doses, it felt like a void a non navigatable headspace at the time.