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Misc The Pain Management Mega Thread v. 7

=D Shouldn't share amongst the young-uns, but I laugh at myself. Y'all can, too.

I had to google "hmu"...insert rotflmao...I get it now.

Afterthought: If most of my PAIN PEEPS are feeling as wretched as I...We could "maybe" roll on the floor, laughing our asses off. Rest assured we'd need help getting back up! Somehow, I think the laugh would be totally worth it!

Bless you Father John...Sorry, I had to. =D

Quick shout out to all of my peeps. There seems to only be the sound of crickets on this thread lately. How is everybody?

I tried my first vape gadget yesterday, as outright smoking will never suit me. Still testing...Need a mentor...Any takers?
Oil/RSO seems too unpredictable for my schedule.

Although I'm rarely posting on BL, I still stop by most days. As previously stated, I welcome conversation with any/all of you. hmu :p
 
=D Shouldn't share amongst the young-uns, but I laugh at myself. Y'all can, too.

I had to google "hmu"...insert rotflmao...I get it now.

Afterthought: If most of my PAIN PEEPS are feeling as wretched as I...We could "maybe" roll on the floor, laughing our asses off. Rest assured we'd need help getting back up! Somehow, I think the laugh would be totally worth it!

Bless you Father...Are you asking me to sin? Sorry, I had to. =D

Quick shout out to all of my peeps. There seems to only be the sound of crickets on this thread lately. How is everybody?

I tried my first vape gadget yesterday, as outright smoking will never suit me. Still testing...Need a mentor...Any takers? Oil/RSO seems too unpredictable for my schedule, but I'm experimenting with it, too. I would much prefer to use the sublingual oil. If I find that the only results I get are the "goofy" and "stoopid" feelings...No thanks.

Although I'm rarely posting on BL, it's not because I've lost interest. Nope, it just makes me sad when few new posts are made. I still stop by most days, but don't have anything "new" to add, or offer.

As previously stated, I welcome conversation with any/all of you.

hey...hmu :p
 
Your in luck I just happened to get my first two doctorates in being a "bored" certified specialist specializing in mentoring-ship speccialest with hella working knowledge of how to get
EL-Bakededged. Btw my middle name is thMentoreist. I know you're having a difficult time with it. Busy trying to be rid of the pain? Pm me ✌️
 
Oh, dear Dixi, you make me chuckle. And in saying that I sound like I'm 90yrs old lol. At a guess is it 'hit me up'? When I was new to BL I had a few offers of drugs for sale but obv just deleted the PMs.

Talking of PMs, I saw a new one (Dr),ystrdy that my neurosurgeon referred me too (practice in the same group), I'm also seeing a Pain Psychiatrist in sept under the same umbrella in regard to my hand being numb yet on fire.

He told me that lyrica was the biggest marketing scam the world of PM has ever seen & that in controlled double-blind trials it actually only works for 1 in 7 (for neuropathic pain, not recreation or opi wd relief lol).

I countered with, "I thought a medicine had to work for 1 out of 5 patients before it could go on the market"?

He replied that Pfizer paid to have pregabalin approved through the TGA & no government body would turn away from that much money.

Interesting.

Apart from that he told me just to keep on doing what I'm doing, - physio, gym, light weights to keep function up, hydro, psych, and a quite new thing called Graded Motor Imaging.

It's about trying to trick your brain by (with a physio), using a mirrored box where you use your good hand painlessly & with full range of motion & your brain interprets it as your bad hand doing this. Idk how well it will work but I've gotta try it if science is saying this is the newest treatment for crps.

Lastly, the new PM suggested I taper over 6-9 mths my doses of lyrica, clonadine & bupe somewhat.

Lol. Remember when the neurosurgeon referred me saying he might be able to do shots, or change some meds, I was like "no ones changing my meds"!!

I never ever want my life of muskuloskeletal pain & neuropathic pain flares to come back! I've told everyone I know more than once how a simple change of two meds changed my life forever for the better!!!

I've had a year of no ketamine infusions where previously I'd be admitted to hospital every 6 or 8 weeks for up to 14 days. Not good for me nor sweet child of mine.

This PM was horrified that I'd had about 20 infusions over a two year span. Was like "who was this dr that subjected you to all of this"?

I also showed him blood test results that have seemingly slipped under the radar. My TSH is elevated & if remains so I need medication for an under active thyroid.

Would explain a few things I suppose..

As Dixi does, I too pop in daily to see what's new with my peeps. Can only assume when there's no new posts from the regulars it's either bcos things are going well, or really badly & their minds are far from posting on BL.

Keep talking guys!

Rtp ❤️
 
Hi RTP. A low thyroid can have a big impact on pain as well as being able to deal with it mentally. Glad you've been diagnosed.

It amazes me how freely docs hand out pregabin for off label use.
 
^I vaguely recall a thyroid test being borderline some time ago, but since being ran over and changing drs, I guess it completely slipped my mind until I recieved the test results from after my seizure back in feb this year.

Ideally, you'd think my GP would've jumped on this, but even I only just thought to show my copy of these results to a specialist & will also chat with my GP tomorrow.

Hopefully I can blame an underactive thyroid rather than lyrica for the good chunk of spunk I atm lol.

Yeah, lyrica,- I don't know if drs misunderstand the different types of pain, just blanketly think it will benefit any pain,(particularly if they can avoid scripting opiates), or if it's the patients not being able to be clear about what their pain feels like.

Then there's the off label use for such things as social anxiety, -again, instead of prescribing benzos.

Rant over,

Rtp
 
Hello everyone, I can't tell you how amazing it feels to find a community of pain patients who aren't playing top trumps for who is in the most pain or most seriously broken. What a relief! I'm in my early 40's and live in the UK (which I'm SO grateful for, reading your nightmares tales of insurance limiting your access to effective pain relief - it's barbaric and I can't imagine how it feels to know what helps you but not to be able to get hold of it legally). My pain is the result of adhesions following 8 huge abdominal ops for crohns/ulcerative colitis. They had to remove my colon in the late nineties when we couldn't get constant bleeding under control, despite throwing all the usual drugs at it. The "good thing" about having no large intestine is that I don't get the total gut freeze that opiates often cause. The adhesions stick the loops of my small intestines to each other as well as to my other organs. Frequently in hospital with obstructions. I've not been able to work in 17 years, and I hate not being a "useful" member of society. I have an amazing GP who has been prepared to treat my pain as a symptom because there are no further treatments available until the catastrophic intestinal failure that is apparently bound to happen, happens, my surgeon says that I'm better off saving my surgical luck until then. So I've been on high doses of opiates/neuropathics/amitryptiline for more than a decade. I was switched from a regime of slow release oxycodone with IR oxycodone and oramorph for breakthrough onto fentanyl patches (starting dose of 100mcgs) when it felt like I'd got so tolerant that it was worth cycling off it for a while. I'd been on MST (slow release morphine) for a few years before that. Using the opiate calculator, my pain specialist worked out my equivalent dose of fent to be 100mcg every 72 hrs. I was immediately really ill for 6 weeks. We'd expected it to be a bit rough swapping over but two and a half years later it seems obvious that actually I was in withdrawal and essentially going cold turkey. For whatever reason, fentanyl has never worked on my pain. So I've spent the last two and a half years mainly in bed, in a hot bath or lying down. I've been able to get up and take the dogs out most days, but the bouncy me of oxycodone was long gone. In those years I've gone repeatedly to see my GP complaining of extreme fatigue, breathlessness, all number of aches and pains. And been told that it's probably the deterioration we were expecting, and to up my fent dose in order to keep on top of the pain. So at Christmas last year I was on 225mcg fentanyl, 180mg oxycodone X 3 a day, 2700mg gabapentin, 300mg codeine, 120mg loperamide and 300mg amitryptiline. Now because I'd increased my fentanyl dose each time using 25mcg patches on top of my 100mcg ones. And I had loads of the 25's compared to the 100's so I decided I'd make up a few doses out of the 25's. I must preface this next part by explaining that I am SO SHIT at mathematics that it defies belief. So instead of using 9 I used 5. And didn't notice until I came to change my patches for the fourth time. So 9 days of nearly half the dose but I had NO w/d symptoms, needed NO increase in my breakthrough doses and felt amazing. Really clear headed and positive. So I decided to see how much I could taper off fentanyl without feeling worse without consulting any of my docs, but I knew they'd be unlikely to support any continued reduction without insisting on putting me onto a different slow release. I've tapered by a 12.5mcg reduction every 9 or 12 days, waiting to be really sure I'm ok on that dose before going lower. I'm now down to 25mcg and I can't begin to explain how incredible it feels. In the fentanyl fog I didn't even understand I was in a fog, or how awful I felt. I feel like I've got my brain back, everyone has noticed that I'm much more myself. One friend said "what's different? You've got your twinkle back" and that's how it feels. I'm still on everything else in the cocktail mentioned above, but when I realised that I had no additional pain from reducing the fent I decided to see how bad my pain actually is. I'm hopeful that I can come off fentanyl completely, I know it will be easier than if I weren't on oxycodone, but it's still a bit rough physically, the crazy sweats and shakes and muscle aches are horrid. My plan is that when I'm off fentanyl I then talk with my pain team about reviewing the rest of my meds. I feel very strongly that gabapentin doesn't make any difference to me. I came off it to go onto pregabalin instead but pregabalin made me constantly vomitty, so I stopped that and didn't go back to gabapentin until a routine GP appointment 3 months later meant he asked why I'd not requested any more on Px, I explained that his suggestion to switch to pregabalin hadn't worked and he insisted I go back to gabapentin, part of the pain protocol being a neuropathic element. But again I noticed no increased pain over that time. If I can get enough pain relief to function without being in such a fog of fuzziness then I will feel like I've got some of my life back. My long term prognosis is awful, and I know there isn't any hope I'll get better, I've seen the best people, I've done all the research, but if I can live some of my remaining life feeling more like a human and less like a robot then I will feel like I've won. If anyone has advice about coming off fentanyl or gabapentin (I think it's called neurontin in the US?) then I'd love to hear it. You are all such warriors, and hugely inspiring, I wish you didn't all have to be so brave. I'm only too aware that if you don't get lucky with a great doctor then your life can be unbearable. I know how hard it is to live with chronic pain even when you have all the drugs in the world to throw at it, and the fact that some of you have no option but to break the law just to maintain a level of pain you can function with is just awful. So thank you for reading my mega essay and thank you for all being so open with your experiences. Just knowing there are people out there who really get it is such a comfort.
 
:) Hello Nooby and WELCOME to our PAIN PEEP home! Find a comfy place to sit or lie down, maybe a binky or heating pad? We do whatever it takes to make each other comfortable. We type. We laugh. We rant. We cry. Most importantly, we share. We're sorry you have pain, but happy you found us.

Not to sound crude (but I am=) I don't see pain as a "dick-sizing" or "pissing contest". None of us do. Pain is PAIN, no better or worse...It all sucks! I know what you mean about other forums, as I've gotten kicked off at least a couple for speaking my truth. I was told I was too graphic and scared the hell out of people. Well, sorry Charlie...This fucking disease is GRAPHIC and can kill many aspects of your life.

My mercy, you have been through the wringer! I can so empathize, as I cringe and draw my knees to my chest. Gut pain is horrific. Bless your heart...8 surgeries!?! YOU, my friend, are an inspiration! Kudos for tapering with the Fentanyl. I know it can be an amazing med for many, but not for me. I, like you, prefer to keep a clear mind rather than feeling dazed and confused.

Your "twinkle" is evident here, sweetie! Attitude is everything, though I confess mine has been BAD lately. Thank you for stopping by...come often...stay long! I'd love to type to ya!

SHOUTS OUT to RTP, Shroomy, SKR, Anna, closeau, SNod, Tinker, KatM...etal :!

I've had a shit storm of stress, FEAR and sadness of late with my husband's health. He has med-resistant HBP (takes 5 meds daily 25+ years) It went rogue and spiked in July, with profound irregular heartbeat as a bonus. In the process of lab work and med changes, they found 250 blood sugar, fasting. SO...Bam!!! He has Type 2 Diabetes, with no family history. He has started medication and we are trying to educate ourselves for his diet. His BP is coming down to a more normal range (for him).

RTP...Thyroid? His was checked a couple of years ago. He takes Armor (sic) daily. That damn thyroid can be a pesky little bugger. I hope you can get sorted out!

Y'all, I've gotta be real here. I am in a DARK and frightening place emotionally. I know, I try to keep up a façade...a laugh nearby. No, therapy won't help. My psychologist left his practice because I depressed HIM!

I have sickness and death all around me (that I cannot avoid) My husband and I have always been the CALVARY for everyone we know. It has not been reciprocated, as we face our demons ALONE. I cannot and will not abandon my 90 year old mom. My 5 older siblings have scattered like cockroaches, leaving me alone to deal with ALL of it. I have no emotional support from them, no one to talk to except my hubby. I don't like to burden him, though he's been very supportive. His mom is in a separate nursing home and does not know us any more.

My mom didn't know ME last week. I did her manicure, as always, but polished them in a lovely turquoise shade. I also take her 2 corndogs (her favorite) and a Sonic Route 44 drink. She eats every bite and drinks every sip like a starving dog. She wanted ice cream, too, so I got it for her. As I was tucking her in and saying good-bye, she said "It's hard to sleep when you're hungry". She didn't realize she'd just eaten all of that. She also said "I'd starve to death if you didn't bring me food".

...Mounts the trusty white steed and charges once again into the nurses station and administrator's office, sword drawn! Although I've requested her food to be partially pureed, those fuckers are to lazy to feed her! Yet, there is denial and finger-pointing as always...no accountability.

Sorry I took this post off in the ditch. That's where you'll find me these days...
 
@dixichik I'm so sorry you are carrying so much of everyone else's pain as well as your own. I'm also the go to person for friends and family. I think it's often the people with the most to manage who cope best so get leant on hardest. I love the analogy about self care, that it's like putting your own oxygen mask on before helping others with theirs, but I know that sometimes the only way through is to charge at it headlong and just keep going until you drop. I'm also functionally an only child, I live very near my folks and I know as they age they'll need me, but I can't imagine grudging that when they've been such amazing parents. I so admire you for your devotion to your mum, I hope I'm as gracious and generous with mine. I'm sorry things are all so hard at once. I think that if life were remotely fair then problems would be like the bad guys in old James Bond movies where they line up to fight him one at a time, instead of all piling on like they have with you. It's obvious from your previous posts that you have a heart the size of Alaska and are always offering support and kindness to people who need it. Please don't stay away when you are feeling low, and don't underestimate how much people care. Xxx
 
Hey again Nooby...Thank you for your kind words. Funny, but not, mine were NEVER "amazing parents"...quite the polar opposite! Yet, I do not wish to live with regret of what I "should" have done. If I do what is right, that action can never be wrong.

Although I joke that I suit up in riot gear to visit my mom...She truly was the most evil, sadistic woman I've known. She would still beat me if she were capable. My dad beat us, too, until we grew up and he grew old. He had bruises from my mom when he died. I had left the family for 4+ years to save my sanity. My siblings knew she was abusing him, but were too coward to intervene. I came back for his funeral just before 9/11. Truthfully, I wish I hadn't.

I try to make peace with it all, yet I have such a vivid photographic memory...I relive the abuse, though I try to rise above, the memories and feelings creep in through sites, sounds, smells.

I long ago learned that life is not "fair". There's a saying that "fair" is where you take your pet pig to win a blue ribbon. FFS, I couldn't even do that. My earliest memories are my mom forcing my brother to shoot our pigs. She slit their throats and forced us kids to help with the slaughter/processing of curing the meat. She'd whip my ass every time I refused to eat the pork, because he/she had a name. I wouldn't eat chickens off the yard, either...more whippings.

It's truly a testament that none of the 6 of us became a blight to society. We are who we are, not because of, but in spite of the abuse. Not one of us turned to alcohol or drugs...not even cigarettes. We all obtained degrees from university and have professional careers in which we are reasonably successful. My siblings have been blessed with good health, all with children and grandchildren...some great grandchildren. My disease robbed me of the children we wanted, but I've been a mother figure to many.

My health, like yours, is wrecked. Most people don't know, because I keep the façade of "perfect". I can't do this any more.

Thanks for listening. :\
 
Hey Dixie,

I would say chin up, but sometimes it it just doesn't make it up, does it? So sorry about your husband's issues; I can't imagine how hard it is to watch a loved one suffer. I see it in my husband's eyes, and I feel badly. I'm doing better.

I wish some of my luck on everyone here. RTP, I can't believe that garbage about Lyrica...except I can. I truly hope your new therapy works. I read your post out loud, and my 9 year old daughter said, "that should work". So I'm confident that it will!

Welcome, Nooby! I can't believe you were on all that Fent; that's crazy! I was on it years ago, but never went past 50mcg. I too, used to withdraw super fast; I could always feel the HOUR it finished in my body. Ugh.

Well, the stimulator plus the radio frequency did help, and my whole family climbed Cannon Mountain last week (4100 ft!) My daughter and I took the tram down. My back was definitely sore later, but not terrible!

More than anything, I hope everyone's spirits stay up. I know it's hard. Vent here's! "Hit us up!" (I had to look that up, too).
 
Hey Anna...SO GOOD to hear from you, especially that you're feeling some better! Speaking of mountains...

What did Kermit the frog say when he reached the top? M'uppit! =D
 
I always think that if anyone had said to me at the beginning, when I was so confident that being broken was temporary, that it was just a case of finding the right treatment, the right doctor, the right surgery, that 18 years later I'd not only not be better, but I'd have given up a career I loved that had only just got going before I was sick, and that the children I'd blithely assumed would be part of my life would never happen, then I'd have given up. We all deal with our shit one day at a time, bevause that's all we can do. @dixichik You are made of strength and goodness, to have lived through what you have and still be humane with an abusive parent is immense. And to be strong for others when they are wobbly in the face of all you manage is incredible. I'm humbled by your attitude. Much love to you. X
 
iamthesuck said:
I've been getting cluster headaches, and I'm debating asking for opioids to help with the pain. Immitrex helps some, but not enough. I'm not sure what to ask for, because they happen almost every day for weeks at a time. I don't even know if it's a good idea long term, but the pain is amazing for a headache.
Click to expand...

I had cluster migraines from the time I was 9 until I was 18. It made me feel suicidal when I had them. Now I get migraine in the trigeminal nerve over my right eye, with crunching pain and stiffness in the neck.

Have you tried Imatrex injection? It's stronger and works much faster than the tablet. If you're having that many migraines per month, you ought to try a preventative medication, like Topamax. You take it every day. I had nausea and diarrhea while getting used to Topamax and took Reglan for the nausea. After a few weeks I no longer had the side effects. You don't want to miss a dose, because guess what that gives you? Headache. But Topamax works really great. It does cause some weight loss, but most people are ok with that.

I don't recommend opiates for migraine, as they often make the headache worse. Analgesics can do that to migraines. I've seen Demoral work for people, but as far as I know, you only get that in the ER
 
I'm new to the pain thread, and you know what? I have tears in my eyes because there are people here who speak my language and who relate to my suffering. I feel pretty confident already that I won't get rude comments suggesting that I'm largely responsible for what I go through, because I do too much, because I don't do enough, because I don't have an A+ diet or because I'm too damn sensitive to pain.

For me, it's like I'm trapped alone in this world of hurt, this lonely and constant hurt, but people can't see me, they can't SEE my pain even though it's huge and screaming. They can't see it and they can't feel it, and they aren't quite sure why I make such a big deal out of it. It's not a broken leg or a missing limb that you can look at and know for sure that something is definitely wrong. But you know what, just because a person has a lousy ability to visualize what is going on inside of my body, does not in any way reduce the fact that it is THERE!!

I am told things like, "Well, you know, when I have pain I just tell myself not to think about it, and then it doesn't really bother me." My response is: "Perhaps that's because you don't have Fibromyalgia. Or spinal degeneration. Perhaps that is because you don't have chronic pain every day." The thing is, a healthy person can knock their toe against a door frame, and although it is painful, within minutes the brain will send a message to release a natural chemical that is as strong as morphine. So, it isn't that the healthy person has Jedi mind control and can block out the pain. It isn't that they're rough and tough like John Wayne, and they can take it like a soldier. It's because their body releases natural painkillers that are as strong as MORPHINE!!

When I have pain, my body doesn't release this pain killer. On top of that, when a body feels pain for an extended time without relief, the nerves become sensitized, and this makes the pain amplify. Imagine if someone lightly ran their fingernail over your forearm. No problem, right? But now imagine that they run their fingernail over that very same spot, over and over for the next 30 minutes. First it would begin to irritate your arm. Then it would get uncomfortable. Finally it would hurt, and eventually you would become so sensitized to it that the pain would be excruciating. That's the pain of Fibromyalgia. It isn't about being a wimp about pain or not having a strong and determined mind. It's about raw pain that amplifies and never completely stops. Every single day. Some are worse than others, but none of them are without pain.
 
Nice to see that Anna, Dixi and RTP (and others) have kept this thread up and working. Thanks for you for your contribution to BL.

I was away for a little while since I had relapse with oxycodone and was shamed and felt a lot of selfhatred.

Pain levels due "fixed" spinal injury are manageable but my addiction to painkillers isn't. Therefore I am about to enter opiate replacement therapy next week and I hope it will help me to deal with my addiction issues.

I am a "good" example of how legit longterm use of opioids can turn into fullblown addiction so everyone should be careful how they use their painkillers even if they have a good reason. Otherwise things complicate as when you admit to doctors that you are dependant and use recreationally too you have to dig deep to find doctors who will treat your legit pain issues while also having knowledge how to deal with the addiction.

More on my situation here if anyone is interested: http://www.bluelight.org/vb/threads/800540-Road-to-Recovery
 
:) Hello Purple T and WELCOME! Please settle in and make yourself comfy. You're safe here, whether you need to talk, listen, cry or laugh. I am so sorry you are suffering.

Welcome Back MrRoot! I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Don't beat yourself up...Just dust yourself off and hold yourself accountable. Some days it's one breath at a time, my friend, even when just "breathing" hurts. Good to see ya!

No real updates for me...I did start a thread for suggestions on MMJ entitled "Weed Wizards Wanted". Y'all are welcome to make suggestions if you've tried medical strains (by name) that you've found helpful.

I'm trying to vape, but confess this isn't my jam, folks!
 
+DixiChik, I believe you mentioned no longer having muscle and nerve pain, and that it was due to medication? If that's correct, can you share what helped you with this?

I wake up so stiff in the morning that I tend to grunt my way through coffee, and, well, pretty much the entire first hour that I'm awake. It sounds a bit like hog feeding time at the farm. I get bouts of severe muscle spasms in my entire back, and sometimes, for extra fun, my chest, ribs and abdominals join in too. It's like a seizure almost, but I'm awake.
 
:\ Hey Purple T...Oh, hell no sweetie! It wasn't me that said I no longer have muscle/nerve pain. I wish, but IMO wishes are a waste of time.

But seriously, you are welcome (if you are into self torture) to read my earlier threads/posts that detail my train wreck of a life. I'd suggest the shortcut, though. There have been meds that have helped me over the years. There have been treatments that have caused more damage than benefit. I had little choice in any of it, as "back then" the surgeons were just trying to "save my life".

My GI issues trump any minimal amount of good that meds do, so I have to be careful. Sadly, Darvocet was my go-to for a couple of decades. I still DREAM about those wonderful orange miracles! No, they didn't alleviate all of my pain. Not even surgical anesthesia can do that. Darvocet allowed me to function, without horrid side effects. I only went to Fentanyl type big guns (briefly) during acute traumas and/or surgeries. When Darvocet was taken off the market, I was left with Tramadol which was a joke.

Since enrolling in PM in 2014, I've tried Fentanyl, MS Contin, Oxycodone, etc. They're a joke, too, IMO...with no punchline! Okay, Dixie "choose" pain or perforated bowel from constipation!

Anti-inflammatory med (Toradol) IV and (Morphine) IV have brought the most relief, but require hospitalization. I don't do needles. My husband gives me my B12 shots weekly. I joke that I need an IV drip bag hung at night like MJ...but it's really not a joke. Again, wishes...

It hurts to move, but it hurts worse when I don't move. I try to swim laps daily, not because I want to or enjoy it. I do so because it's easy on my joints. I can't pound pavement by running for exercise, because I'd end up unable to walk. I do Yoga stretches and resistance bands to help with flexibility.

I get Synvisc One shots in both knees (vomit in garbage can painful) but less so than TKR on both. I have a TENS unit that is helpful with my spine and my pelvic cramps. I have a close personal relationship with my heating pad...have burned through the leather of chairs. Yea, sometimes I think I've "cooked" my kidneys! Diclofenac is a wonder drug for me, but GI issues. Neurontin helped for a brief time when SHINGLES attacked my face, eye and scalp. I got off those as soon as I could endure the (still and forever) residual pain of SHINGLES.

Doll-baby, I'm sorry you are hurting. Don't apologize for piggy grunts...or outright SQUEALS!!?!! I cry out in the night, just trying to change positions in bed. It feels as though my spine is being ripped from my flesh.

HOPE is what brought me through the decades. I'm running on empty since I hit 50. Dayem...That's been 5 years!

For shitz and giggles, I'm trying MMJ...Never, ever, ever did "recreational drugs". FEAR of death by my mom was a strong deterrent! I guess I should thank her for that. Ya know..."spare the rod, spoil the child". Let's just say no rods were spared.

Tears rolled when I read Nooby's posts (above) especially when she said "if she'd known things wouldn't get better..." Me, too.

(((HUGS)))
 
Welcome purple tantrum, think that might've been my posts you're thinking of...

Not a road all would like to go down, but I guess if you're already posting here then your pain is paramount to any other concern.

I've gotta dash for now, I'll PM you tonight.

Do you mind sharing the meds you're on/have tried in the meantime? Just curious as it may not be possible for you to take the path that's helped myself so incredibly.

Cheers,

Rtp
 
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