I'm currently subject to probation drug testing and will continue to be for a considerable amount of time. Because of the draconian drugs laws of the USA and a not so bright decision, I found myself thrown into a situation where either my drug use had to change or I would find myself in jail. I know I'm not the only one going through this and I hope that what I've discovered over the last half year can help someone else in my position.
First off, this is not a guide to beating drug tests. It's not to learn how to create a false negative, but rather how to avoid a false positive. I am currently being tested with a 7 panel Quikscreen instant drug test cup. I am tested for amphetamines, THC, cocaine, buprenorphine, oxycodone, opiates, and MDMA. Some of what I've found may not hold true with every brand of drug tests, although I would assume all probation quality tests would work about the same.
Here a little history of my pre-probation drug use. I smoked weed around five days a week. I drank nearly every weekend but rarely during the week. I rolled at least once a month, but I occasionally would throw one in mid month. I would also go on the occasional acid trip and I have tripped on shrooms once in my life. I would also occasionally smoke salvia and I absolutely loved to mix nitrous with anything I could. I liked my drugs, but I always did my best to respect them and respect myself. I never did develop a drug problem. Instead, I found myself in a legal problem.
One notable thing about me is that I'm stubborn. Despite getting myself into a drug related legal shit hole, I never once considered actually quitting drugs. All the legal stuff got me kicked out of college for the year and turned my life upside down. I had lost everything that I used to find fun. God be damned if they took my drugs away too. From Bluelight, I had only a vague knowledge of RCs and other legal drugs before my life blew up. However, thanks to all you guys, I quickly learned that there is a whole world of drugs out there that are legal and often on par with their illegal counterparts. That left me with two obstacles, where to get these drugs, and if they would cause a false positive or not. I won't go into the first one here, but I want share with everyone all the knowledge I've gained to get around the second obstacle. With my tests, there's a mean looking guy that watches me piss into the cup. There's no room for me to pull any bullshit. However, I've found that there are alternative substances that won't trip the tests. Some of these are obvious, but I'll put them anyway. Others aren't so obvious. As a result of all of this, I no longer think of my drug tests as a problem. In one small way, I won. Anyway, here goes.
Nitrous: (Pass): As I'm sure many of you can guess, nitrous doesn't show up on a drug test, as it isn't remotely chemically related to the seven things on my test. It was the first drug I used other than caffeine and tobacco in my post-apocalyptic life. I have to say, a balloon or five never felt so good.
6-APB/Benzo Fury: (Fail-amphetamine): Since 6-APB is very similar to MDA, which is similar to MDMA and amphetamine, I bought several of the Quikscreen cups I get tested with online and gave them to my friend. This began I system I've been using ever since. I give my friend a free dose and he pees in the cup for me. Unfortunately, 6-APB failed for amphetamines.
Mephedrone: (Fail-amphetamine): This also failed for amphetamines. However, I'm not 100% positive that the stuff I got was actually Mephedrone so there may still be hope for it. I didn't have a good source for it at the time so I just gave up on it.
JWH-250: (Pass): This is the first of several cannabinoids that I've used. All synthetic cannabinoids that resemble any of the commonly sold JWH's will pass a normal 7 panel test. However, a lab called redwood toxicology can currently test for JWH-018 and JWH-073 in urine in a GC/MS test. There's also a less common lab out there called Norchem that can test for JWH-250 in urine, but it's not illegal so I was willing to risk them switching up the tests. So far, everything has been fine. The first time I used 250, it felt great to be stoned again. The first few times you use it, it feels like weed, except it only lasts 45 minutes to an hour. As I used it for longer, it was clear that the high was lacking a little something but it still got the job done.
Kratom: (Pass): I discovered kratom a few months into probation. Before I was confined to drug testing, I always thought kratom was one of those rip off legal highs that don’t do anything. In short, I was wrong. If you get the right kratom from a reliable source, it is great for just chilling and feeling good. It is 99% a body high, and doesn’t mess with your head much. JWH is almost the opposite. Together, they are quite nice. If you like weed, then you’ll probably like the feeling. It isn’t exactly the same as being stoned with real weed, but I can honestly say it is either just as good or nearly as good. If I had the option of giving up JWH + kratom for weed, I’d probably take it, but I would certainly miss the combo. You feel high, you feel good, it’s relatively cheap, and there is little to no hangover. Sound familiar?
5-meO-DALT: (Pass): As far as I know, most if not all tryptamines will pass a standard drug test. This one is no exception. It’s not the greatest psychedelic out there, but it is certainly worth trying. It puts you in a trippy mindset, but unfortunately there are little to no visuals. It also has some nice euphoria to it, but it also causes a lot of people to get a little nauseous. A Tums comes in handy for this. Also, this was the first drug I’ve ever used that can have an uncomfortable come up. A lot of people I know who tried it thought it was a bad drug during the first hour, only to end up enjoying it a lot. After the first hour however, the confusion and nausea settles out into a trippy euphoric high that lasts for around 3-4 hours. It’s definitely not as full and awesome as LSD, but it’s good for an evening of happy confusion.
MDAI: (Pass): This is by far the best drug I’ve found so far. I’m a little biased because my favorite drug pre-arrest was MDMA. I put off trying it for a while because I read a lot of lackluster reviews about it. Finally, I decided to give it a try, and I was blown away by it. The first time I used it I combined it with kratom. This is definitely a unusual combo, but it worked extremely well. I thought I was just in for a relaxing, happy night. However, an hour after dropping 200 mg, I knew without a doubt that I found a viable replacement for MDMA. To me, it felt just like rolling but without the stimulation. It isn’t just a poor substitute for MDMA. It is a great drug in it’s own right. Even when I get off probation, I will undoubtedly continue to use it if it isn’t illegal by then. To me, it is 85% as good as MDMA and lacks most of the negative side effects. There is no depression, no headaches, or anything like that. The worst I’ve ever felt the next day was a little tired from lack of sleep. The lack of negative side effects is probably because it isn’t neurotoxic according to the studies I’ve read. MDAI is also great combined with a decent stimulant, and feels even more like MDMA. According to some studies on it, it isn’t neurotoxic when combined with a dopamine reuptake inhibitor, like methylphenidate or MDPV. My friends have told me it is great with adderall and feels almost identical to rolling. However, when combined with a dopamine releaser like amphetamine, it is neurotoxic comparable to MDMA, and thus carries the negative side effects. But for those of us getting drug tested, we can’t touch amphetamine anyway.
MDPV: (Pass): I got MDPV to combine with MDAI. It’s not worth it. IMO, MDPV is shit. It’s probably the least satisfying drug I’ve used in my life. When snorted, you feel kinda nice for an hour, and then feel like shit for the next five hours or so. When you eat it, you feel good for a few hours, and then feel like shit the rest of the day. The high isn’t worth the crash. If you accidentally use too much, which is easy to do since the dose is so small, be prepared for intense over stimulation and jaw clenching like you wouldn’t believe. At first, I thought I liked it but after using it around 10 times, I simply gave it up and wrote it off as a learning experience. If you like plain stimulants and are being tested, you might get something out of it, but I certainly did not.
Methoxetamine: (Pass): Methoxetamine passes for everything on my tests. However, I’m not tested for ketamine and methoxetamine is quite similar to ketamine. I did some googling and I found that ketamine is metabolized into norketamine, which is what I believe would be tested for in a drug test for ketamine. I’m not a chemist, but I can’t see methoxetamine being metabolized into norketamine so I wouldn’t worry about that. Methoxetamine was the first dissociative that I’ve used other than salvia and nitrous so I don’t have much to compare it to. However, it’s quite fun and I would suggest it to anyone who has some experience with psychedelics. Otherwise, I’d say start really small with it. It’s something that’s good for a night with a few close friends or alone. I wouldn’t go to a party with it, as it makes you act pretty retarded.
First off, this is not a guide to beating drug tests. It's not to learn how to create a false negative, but rather how to avoid a false positive. I am currently being tested with a 7 panel Quikscreen instant drug test cup. I am tested for amphetamines, THC, cocaine, buprenorphine, oxycodone, opiates, and MDMA. Some of what I've found may not hold true with every brand of drug tests, although I would assume all probation quality tests would work about the same.
Here a little history of my pre-probation drug use. I smoked weed around five days a week. I drank nearly every weekend but rarely during the week. I rolled at least once a month, but I occasionally would throw one in mid month. I would also go on the occasional acid trip and I have tripped on shrooms once in my life. I would also occasionally smoke salvia and I absolutely loved to mix nitrous with anything I could. I liked my drugs, but I always did my best to respect them and respect myself. I never did develop a drug problem. Instead, I found myself in a legal problem.
One notable thing about me is that I'm stubborn. Despite getting myself into a drug related legal shit hole, I never once considered actually quitting drugs. All the legal stuff got me kicked out of college for the year and turned my life upside down. I had lost everything that I used to find fun. God be damned if they took my drugs away too. From Bluelight, I had only a vague knowledge of RCs and other legal drugs before my life blew up. However, thanks to all you guys, I quickly learned that there is a whole world of drugs out there that are legal and often on par with their illegal counterparts. That left me with two obstacles, where to get these drugs, and if they would cause a false positive or not. I won't go into the first one here, but I want share with everyone all the knowledge I've gained to get around the second obstacle. With my tests, there's a mean looking guy that watches me piss into the cup. There's no room for me to pull any bullshit. However, I've found that there are alternative substances that won't trip the tests. Some of these are obvious, but I'll put them anyway. Others aren't so obvious. As a result of all of this, I no longer think of my drug tests as a problem. In one small way, I won. Anyway, here goes.
Nitrous: (Pass): As I'm sure many of you can guess, nitrous doesn't show up on a drug test, as it isn't remotely chemically related to the seven things on my test. It was the first drug I used other than caffeine and tobacco in my post-apocalyptic life. I have to say, a balloon or five never felt so good.
6-APB/Benzo Fury: (Fail-amphetamine): Since 6-APB is very similar to MDA, which is similar to MDMA and amphetamine, I bought several of the Quikscreen cups I get tested with online and gave them to my friend. This began I system I've been using ever since. I give my friend a free dose and he pees in the cup for me. Unfortunately, 6-APB failed for amphetamines.
Mephedrone: (Fail-amphetamine): This also failed for amphetamines. However, I'm not 100% positive that the stuff I got was actually Mephedrone so there may still be hope for it. I didn't have a good source for it at the time so I just gave up on it.
JWH-250: (Pass): This is the first of several cannabinoids that I've used. All synthetic cannabinoids that resemble any of the commonly sold JWH's will pass a normal 7 panel test. However, a lab called redwood toxicology can currently test for JWH-018 and JWH-073 in urine in a GC/MS test. There's also a less common lab out there called Norchem that can test for JWH-250 in urine, but it's not illegal so I was willing to risk them switching up the tests. So far, everything has been fine. The first time I used 250, it felt great to be stoned again. The first few times you use it, it feels like weed, except it only lasts 45 minutes to an hour. As I used it for longer, it was clear that the high was lacking a little something but it still got the job done.
Kratom: (Pass): I discovered kratom a few months into probation. Before I was confined to drug testing, I always thought kratom was one of those rip off legal highs that don’t do anything. In short, I was wrong. If you get the right kratom from a reliable source, it is great for just chilling and feeling good. It is 99% a body high, and doesn’t mess with your head much. JWH is almost the opposite. Together, they are quite nice. If you like weed, then you’ll probably like the feeling. It isn’t exactly the same as being stoned with real weed, but I can honestly say it is either just as good or nearly as good. If I had the option of giving up JWH + kratom for weed, I’d probably take it, but I would certainly miss the combo. You feel high, you feel good, it’s relatively cheap, and there is little to no hangover. Sound familiar?
5-meO-DALT: (Pass): As far as I know, most if not all tryptamines will pass a standard drug test. This one is no exception. It’s not the greatest psychedelic out there, but it is certainly worth trying. It puts you in a trippy mindset, but unfortunately there are little to no visuals. It also has some nice euphoria to it, but it also causes a lot of people to get a little nauseous. A Tums comes in handy for this. Also, this was the first drug I’ve ever used that can have an uncomfortable come up. A lot of people I know who tried it thought it was a bad drug during the first hour, only to end up enjoying it a lot. After the first hour however, the confusion and nausea settles out into a trippy euphoric high that lasts for around 3-4 hours. It’s definitely not as full and awesome as LSD, but it’s good for an evening of happy confusion.
MDAI: (Pass): This is by far the best drug I’ve found so far. I’m a little biased because my favorite drug pre-arrest was MDMA. I put off trying it for a while because I read a lot of lackluster reviews about it. Finally, I decided to give it a try, and I was blown away by it. The first time I used it I combined it with kratom. This is definitely a unusual combo, but it worked extremely well. I thought I was just in for a relaxing, happy night. However, an hour after dropping 200 mg, I knew without a doubt that I found a viable replacement for MDMA. To me, it felt just like rolling but without the stimulation. It isn’t just a poor substitute for MDMA. It is a great drug in it’s own right. Even when I get off probation, I will undoubtedly continue to use it if it isn’t illegal by then. To me, it is 85% as good as MDMA and lacks most of the negative side effects. There is no depression, no headaches, or anything like that. The worst I’ve ever felt the next day was a little tired from lack of sleep. The lack of negative side effects is probably because it isn’t neurotoxic according to the studies I’ve read. MDAI is also great combined with a decent stimulant, and feels even more like MDMA. According to some studies on it, it isn’t neurotoxic when combined with a dopamine reuptake inhibitor, like methylphenidate or MDPV. My friends have told me it is great with adderall and feels almost identical to rolling. However, when combined with a dopamine releaser like amphetamine, it is neurotoxic comparable to MDMA, and thus carries the negative side effects. But for those of us getting drug tested, we can’t touch amphetamine anyway.
MDPV: (Pass): I got MDPV to combine with MDAI. It’s not worth it. IMO, MDPV is shit. It’s probably the least satisfying drug I’ve used in my life. When snorted, you feel kinda nice for an hour, and then feel like shit for the next five hours or so. When you eat it, you feel good for a few hours, and then feel like shit the rest of the day. The high isn’t worth the crash. If you accidentally use too much, which is easy to do since the dose is so small, be prepared for intense over stimulation and jaw clenching like you wouldn’t believe. At first, I thought I liked it but after using it around 10 times, I simply gave it up and wrote it off as a learning experience. If you like plain stimulants and are being tested, you might get something out of it, but I certainly did not.
Methoxetamine: (Pass): Methoxetamine passes for everything on my tests. However, I’m not tested for ketamine and methoxetamine is quite similar to ketamine. I did some googling and I found that ketamine is metabolized into norketamine, which is what I believe would be tested for in a drug test for ketamine. I’m not a chemist, but I can’t see methoxetamine being metabolized into norketamine so I wouldn’t worry about that. Methoxetamine was the first dissociative that I’ve used other than salvia and nitrous so I don’t have much to compare it to. However, it’s quite fun and I would suggest it to anyone who has some experience with psychedelics. Otherwise, I’d say start really small with it. It’s something that’s good for a night with a few close friends or alone. I wouldn’t go to a party with it, as it makes you act pretty retarded.
