the end of the world

[Dastrix Slogan]

and as we ran through
sweet fields of unripened grain
electric orange rain
coasted down from the heavens
and sparks bounced along the ground
dancing
out of step between our boots

while the women screamed
and the children cried
we dropped like flies
biting into the mud
where our bullets sank
beside our bodies

and the bombs rained down
from the tails
of metal buzzards
circling above
in the flawless blue sky

holsters in our hands
tobacco on our tongues
wet rice paper thoughts
sticky on our foreheads

its the end of the world man
its the end of the world

 

[l0ckd0wn]

This gives me images of vietnam... I dont know if that is what you were going for, but it strikes close!

 

[(Wordy)]

That's funny... the theme for papertigermedia's New World Poetry #7 is 'the end of the world'.

Submissions close today - maybe you should submit this?

http://www.papertigermedia.com/guidelines/pt_guidelines.htm

My favourite parts:

we dropped like flies
biting into the mud
where our bullets sank
beside our bodies

and

holsters in our hands
tobacco on our tongues
wet rice paper thoughts
sticky on our foreheads

Great stuff!

 

[skjalff]

I liked this.. recently seen bits of "letters from iwo jima" reminded me a lot of that one. I'm happy to see you are still here justin, and am not surprised one bit that your writing is still changing and evolving and staying as vivid as I remember it!


skjalff

 

[up all night]

I hope you read Wordy's response in time because I really think you should have submitted it. Beautiful to read.

 

[jameslovesyou]

i love armagedon as a subect and a plausable reality. nice.

 

[Raz]

I agree with l0ckd0wn and UAN.....I really like this..

 

[katmeow]

Oh how I wish you were posting here more often.

Still great

 

[New]

Yeah, I could really feel the battlezone in that one.

And the napalm.

I like it.

 

[echo off]

i really like it also, but i find myself slightly agreeing with lockdown... tho I don't see vietnam, I just see a vision of the end of the world which was created over 20 years ago.

 

[RareForm]

phenomenal imagery to say the least. i quite like the rhythm. makes me feel music in my soul. *steals your brain and runs away*

 

[colicolo]

gold