Have had so much to drink my tummy hurts but barely even feel buzzed, my alcohol tolerance must be ridiculous at the moment. Hate myself for how much I've eaten today and just in general hating myself, wish I could curl up and sleep until more drugs but have to get through at least one more shitty fucking sober day. So ready to get away been home for less than a week and I already can't stand it, I can't be around normal people I just want the weekend to come so I can run away and fall back into a mountain of drugs and fake bliss.
I'm seriously worried about you - and with this being a HR site it wouldn't be right to say nothing.
When I became addicted to codeine (yes I know some class it as weak, not the issue) I had the same thoughts you're having now - and it took me to a dark place.
There's nothing wrong in drugs n having s good time (and, of course, I can't tell you what to do) but if you're getting to a point you can't go a day sobre or are scared of going a day sober, you need to do some thinking.
I would hate to see you go down a destructive path. You're 19 (am I right? I'm sure you said 19?!), in uni with your whole life ahead of you. Use drugs to compliment that, have fun, find yourself whatever but if you're avoid a day without them / living for them then I'm worried. I see myself in you a few years back - different drug, similar behaviour n thought pattern.
Always here if you ever need someone to talk to, ok?!
Edit: not trying to preach it's just I wouldn't wish addiction on my worst enemy, nothing worst than not being able to get through the day, or feeling your happiness depends on a certain substance. It's horrible, completely changes your thought process n it's not a nice place to be.
Evey
![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
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