Ksa
Ex-Bluelighter
You know when you get a new job, and next thing you know, you need to knock on doors and present bullshit to people known for being a terrible scam...and you feel terrible knocking on the first door, getting second thoughts about knocking on the second, and then, miraculously, by the 100th door you're like a zombie not giving a shit.
I was just wondering what chemical change occurred for it to happen that way. How was the de-sensitization achieved, and is the de-sensitization only acting on the pain of doing that job or also on sexual pleasure, actually decreasing sensitivity to both sensations?
What I have noticed after getting used to a stressful job is that I enjoyed sex less, video-games and other pleasurable activities, which leads me to believe that the getting used to process actually does not discriminate and makes you more insensitive to everything. And after a vacation, where I was able to focus on those pleasurable activities properly and for a long time, surprize! When back to work I was feeling a bit anxious again.
Another clue to what is happening for real is my amphetamine use. Normally, dextroamphetamine kicks in very smoothly without causing any tension or unease, but after getting used to a stressful job without amphetamines, the first amphetamine use gives a sensation of unease and tension with a bit of a headache and the sensation itself, you don't really know what to feel...it feels really toxic...then after a day or two it's back to being all nice and sweet without any side effects.
It's like the getting used to process is like a toxic cloud floating over my brain, very very weird, it's like it poisons the link between the cortex and the rest of the brain so that what enters the eyes and cortex is not properly received and interpreted.
I was just wondering what chemical change occurred for it to happen that way. How was the de-sensitization achieved, and is the de-sensitization only acting on the pain of doing that job or also on sexual pleasure, actually decreasing sensitivity to both sensations?
What I have noticed after getting used to a stressful job is that I enjoyed sex less, video-games and other pleasurable activities, which leads me to believe that the getting used to process actually does not discriminate and makes you more insensitive to everything. And after a vacation, where I was able to focus on those pleasurable activities properly and for a long time, surprize! When back to work I was feeling a bit anxious again.
Another clue to what is happening for real is my amphetamine use. Normally, dextroamphetamine kicks in very smoothly without causing any tension or unease, but after getting used to a stressful job without amphetamines, the first amphetamine use gives a sensation of unease and tension with a bit of a headache and the sensation itself, you don't really know what to feel...it feels really toxic...then after a day or two it's back to being all nice and sweet without any side effects.
It's like the getting used to process is like a toxic cloud floating over my brain, very very weird, it's like it poisons the link between the cortex and the rest of the brain so that what enters the eyes and cortex is not properly received and interpreted.
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