The Big & Dandy Methoxetamine / MXE Thread - Part 16 - Sweet 16 mind-control machine

[Listening]

All the bad things that have ever happened are like pimples on the ass of the full positive universe. We just have to ride them out for now...

...It's actually too complicated to put into words but let's just say that it worked and that's all that matters...

I'll take your word for it.

Seriously though, Jason brings up an interesting topic, in spite of himself. Good MXE for me, like psychedelics, can be extremely nihilistic ("everything is leading towards some ultimate future perfection, genocide is no big deal," etc). At the same time, it can be very earthy, letting you see yourself, feel yourself, be yourself, live the moment for whatever it is. I've had some incredibly creative moments on MXE and I've also had some incredibly deluded moments on MXE. I've seen the best of myself and the worst of myself.

Recently there's been discussion of what constitutes abuse. As far as I'm concerned, any regular use of this drug is dangerous, psychologically. It's way too easy to lose the critical perspective.

 

[FnX]

I get these very matrixesque vibes often when laying on the bed under the influence. It feels like I am part of two worlds at the same time and for a brief period can experience input from both. The other is, of course, the world I or we see around us, my bed, the curtains, whatever. Then I have this twisted sense of being hooked up in somekind of a tank / machine that is sort of creating this reality in real time, like somekind of an experiment. I can sense the presence of other poeple "working" on this experiment, changing the input and and making me experience reality in a different way. Even putting in some really, really ridiculous and mindblowing synchronicity jokes that constantly make me exclaim "no way did that just happen, no way!". It does feel like a voluntary experiment though, even though it's the greatest mindfuck of all times for me. There's more to this too.

Another theme I often experience during experiences are what I'd best refer to alien beings from other dimensions. Like I was performing for some weird and twisted alien reality show where they can influence things and watch my reactions. And let me tell you, they have some really fucked up sense of humour lol. I can sit on front of the computer, do whatever, and they would go like "let us show you something really mindblowing" and it would be just out of this world. They can be like "oh you wanna watch porn? would you like to watch what we created explicitly for you and your state of mind? Also, we can tweak your body into a state of sustained orgasm that feels ridiculously good, that shall be your reward for being your reality tv star". Hah.

Sometimes I have very shamanistic experiences, where I feel like I can make great changes to the world around me just by meditating. In the end, nothing substantial seems to really happen though, even if you feel like you are moving spiritual mountains during the experience.

There are darker themes as well, like negative beings selfishly extracting my thoughts and creative energy while I lie down in a dissociated half anaesthetised state. I would have these visions and physical feelings of a drill drilling my brain while these entities are just telepathically communicating "tough luck, get over it", leaving me exceptionally drained and not really getting anything out of the experience myself. Feels like involuntary giving. Reminds me a lot how human beings abuse other sentient creatures for their own gains, I'd hazard a guess it's pretty common behaviour in the universe.

It is a very egocentric substance no doubt, best experienced if you can let go and enjoy the weirdness around you without letting it get to you too much. At times it feels like a controlled, benevolent psychosis, but those waters have to be tread with extreme care.

Question: How do you fellow bluelighters like to spend your time while under the influence of MXE at certain dosages?

 

[murphythecat]

good post
I agree. Ive done mxe multiple time for 2 weeks, and Id have to agree that it becomes weird psychologically.
however, now I do it once every 2 week, and mxe is just great and very helpful

I'll take your word for it.

Seriously though, Jason brings up an interesting topic, in spite of himself. Good MXE for me, like psychedelics, can be extremely nihilistic ("everything is leading towards some ultimate future perfection, genocide is no big deal," etc). At the same time, it can be very earthy, letting you see yourself, feel yourself, be yourself, live the moment for whatever it is. I've had some incredibly creative moments on MXE and I've also had some incredibly deluded moments on MXE. I've seen the best of myself and the worst of myself.

Recently there's been discussion of what constitutes abuse. As far as I'm concerned, any regular use of this drug is dangerous, psychologically. It's way too easy to lose the critical perspective.

 

[psy997]

Question: How do you fellow bluelighters like to spend your time while under the influence of MXE at certain dosages?

Very low, almost threshold doses for an anti-depressant / mood boosting effect. Low doses for making music. Low to medium doses are good for what you'd usually engage in while tripping: thought provoking and philosophical movies and films, perhaps drawing, playing an instrument would be good but producing on a computer gets too hard at this point, meditating. Medium to high doses I pretty much solely turn off all the lights, lay down with my eyes closed, and either listen to ambient/downtempo through headphones or preferably use a system if I have a subwoofer. Bass and sub-bass are god-tier while holing.

Exist Strategy - Dreamcatcher. Get that album, you won't regret it.

 

[veodo]

psy997, thank you very much for these album.

god bless you

edit: Question: How do you fellow bluelighters like to spend your time while under the influence of MXE at certain dosages?

Home. Raining day. Warm, comfortable place, computer (news, comunication, socialmedia etc), e-cig with nice flavor, good music, and enjoy the moment, and be the moment, just enjoy the feel of living and your body sensations.

MXE, is the most advanced thing I never feel. No words. One more thing, mxe influence lasts all life.

 

[Bluuberry]

Jason, to some extent the things you are saying are true and I'm glad you've realized them, but you're also going into the land of delusion. You're not the only being out there seeking to realize their true potential. You have company, a community, all around. Don't be so quick to write off "them" or you'll never meet real people.

 

[vortech]

I get these very matrixesque vibes often when laying on the bed under the influence. It feels like I am part of two worlds at the same time and for a brief period can experience input from both. The other is, of course, the world I or we see around us, my bed, the curtains, whatever. Then I have this twisted sense of being hooked up in somekind of a tank / machine that is sort of creating this reality in real time, like somekind of an experiment. I can sense the presence of other poeple "working" on this experiment, changing the input and and making me experience reality in a different way. Even putting in some really, really ridiculous and mindblowing synchronicity jokes that constantly make me exclaim "no way did that just happen, no way!". It does feel like a voluntary experiment though, even though it's the greatest mindfuck of all times for me. There's more to this too.

Another theme I often experience during experiences are what I'd best refer to alien beings from other dimensions. Like I was performing for some weird and twisted alien reality show where they can influence things and watch my reactions. And let me tell you, they have some really fucked up sense of humour lol. I can sit on front of the computer, do whatever, and they would go like "let us show you something really mindblowing" and it would be just out of this world. They can be like "oh you wanna watch porn? would you like to watch what we created explicitly for you and your state of mind? Also, we can tweak your body into a state of sustained orgasm that feels ridiculously good, that shall be your reward for being your reality tv star". Hah.

Sometimes I have very shamanistic experiences, where I feel like I can make great changes to the world around me just by meditating. In the end, nothing substantial seems to really happen though, even if you feel like you are moving spiritual mountains during the experience.

There are darker themes as well, like negative beings selfishly extracting my thoughts and creative energy while I lie down in a dissociated half anaesthetised state. I would have these visions and physical feelings of a drill drilling my brain while these entities are just telepathically communicating "tough luck, get over it", leaving me exceptionally drained and not really getting anything out of the experience myself. Feels like involuntary giving. Reminds me a lot how human beings abuse other sentient creatures for their own gains, I'd hazard a guess it's pretty common behaviour in the universe.

It is a very egocentric substance no doubt, best experienced if you can let go and enjoy the weirdness around you without letting it get to you too much. At times it feels like a controlled, benevolent psychosis, but those waters have to be tread with extreme care.

Question: How do you fellow bluelighters like to spend your time while under the influence of MXE at certain dosages?

FnX I can very closely relate to what you are saying. When I go at the higher doses, its usually in isolation, with the most spiritual or life-affirming or mind-blowing music I can think of, then I ride the wave as I watch the universe take on a whole new perspective.

 

[rolodex propaganda]

 

[Al-lad]

Trying mxe for the first time atm since i acquired 2 grams to try out, i got it from a clearnet vendor and others that ordered from him said it was good mxe. Ill report back after i lick up this 20mg!

Edit: Tastes bad man.....however not as bad as 4-aco-dmt or 4-aco-dmt.

 

[murphythecat]

have fun! I find that mxe, compared to basically everything else, taste quite good.

Jason7, when your off mxe, do that unconditional love stay with you and is a feeling your able to feel at all time sober?

ive done 25mg tonight after a two week break. tolerance is totally down to normal. what a chemical, clearly one of my favorite RC. its just so good

Trying mxe for the first time atm since i acquired 2 grams to try out, i got it from a clearnet vendor and others that ordered from him said it was good mxe. Ill report back after i lick up this 20mg!

Edit: Tastes bad man.....however not as bad as 4-aco-dmt or 4-aco-dmt.

 

[OnMyWayHome]

Love the ideas Jason and you explained them very well in my opinion. So much so that someone who hasn't experienced something similar could probably understand slightly even though you used such few words.

Congratulations also on your experiences and your life so far, it takes a lot of heart and soul to get to that level of understanding and experience. Not to say there isn't some delusional aspects that cannot even be worded properly and can only be directly experienced. The way it comes off to say such things is usually taken wrongly by someone who hasn't personal had experiences of that nature. Also you are not the only one. I have had the delusions that I was the sole creator, but I honestly think this is the way the brain handles the information as to not let yourself become too trustworthy of people/beings.

Also the term autobot to me is someone who just goes through life never looking to find a deeper universal connection or meaning. Using the term in this manner would actually mean most of everyone in the world are autobots and choose to stay that way, or are blinded by the people/beings trying to keep universal consciousness closed off to the majority of the world.

(psy997 your comment about Ram Dass I found funny and actually chuckled. This is because for him to say that about a "friend" is absolutely ridiculous as he was/is one of the biggest egomaniacs of the modern spiritual age. It would be more truthful for him to say "I" instead of calling out a friend for having a god complex)

ॐ ∞ ♥

 

[vortech]

Wow. I've had some breakthroughs the last couple days. Thanks in big part to MXE. I feel like a new person with a clear path in front of me. Well-tuned MXE is definitely one of the most potent allies of humanity when used for the right reasons. After some stretching/yoga, music and meditating my energy field feels whole, and my resolve to do the right thing has never felt so strong.

 

[Xorkoth]

The "sole creator" or "sole being" feelings are things I have had too, but my understanding of it based on my collective experiences is that we are all that same force of consciousness, simultaneously, experiencing itself in an infinity of variations. So though it's true that you're the only one, it's also true that everyone else is also that same one, rather than autobots.

 

[OnMyWayHome]

I agree with what you are saying and believe "we are all that same force of consciousness, simultaneously, experiencing itself in an infinity of variations". I'm not sure what Jason meant by "autobot" but the way I view it is that an "autobot" is someone who goes through life never looking within and being born and dying without ever questioning,adventuring, and living life.

 

[Moxious]

Recently acquired 2 grams of this substance, fine white crystals. Have only tested 5mg insufflated on the tail end of an acid trip this past Saturday night, but even just that taste was wonderfully mellow. It also introduced me to the redose compulsion of this drug, felt a strong pull to take more almost immediately after dosing, and for the following few days. More or less gone by now, but mxe is still a popular topic on my mind. Very excited to explore this stuff some more.
vortech, do you happen to have any idea when you'll be getting the results back from analysis? I'm keen to see what that turns up.

 

[Vurtual]

You could say that you feel like you're the creator of the universe because you are in a sense - the universe you think you live in only exists as a model produced in your head by 'post-processing' - eg peripheral vision is black and white, so if you think you can see the colours of objects outside of your direct gaze, you're mistaken - those colours are added in in the brain; similarly, you're ears individually can't distinguish frequencies very accurately on their own - the brain applies various processes over several passes of input to increase the resolution, resulting in the sensititvity that we enjoy. The point is the cohesive world we 'see' and 'hear' is stiched together by various processes quite far downstream from the actual perceptual input. Add to this the whole conceptual framework that you build your perceptions around - none of these concepts exist anywhere except in your mind/brain.

This is (i think) what's meant by the Koan 'who is the magician who makes the grass green?' It's just your 'magician' (you) that you're perceiving - of course the magician (you) created the universe that you live in - everyone else is exactly the same though (obviously).

Thinking of certain people who you judge to be inferior to you as 'autobots' is a bit of a dodgy way to think imv (maybe they'd see you as an autobot too)

 

[NiceEnough]

This is very interesting discussion based around a very interesting drug.

For me MXE beats ketamine on so many levels - it is more profoundly psychedelic, it is more uplifghting, I find I can take lessons out of my experiences that are lost to the k chaos etc. also, as a Buddhist, I believe that in a very real sense the world we perceive is projection of our own mind. Quantum physics is now coming very close to a similar realisation. Years of meditation and use of psychedelic drugs have suggested to me that this really is the case. However, for me the realisation has also dawned on me that the idea I have of myself is just a thought, nothing more. So there is no real self to be creator of anything, only mind which is itself ultimately empty too. Sorry for the deep Buddhist philosophical rant, none of you of course have to believe me, but these are the conclusions I have come to through my own practices and experiences. And MXE is one drug that I really believe, when respected, can teach us a lot about the true nature of things, of consciousness and so forth.

I used to do huge lines of MXE and spend days in a manic-delusional state, at one time nearly killing myself by throwing myself down the stairs. I now take no more that 50mg at a time and find that really is plenty. You can always top up a little bit a few hours later if you really need to. Such a shame this is banned in UK, there really is no comparison between current NMDA antagonists available on the RC scene in the UK (e.g. MXP).

I also believe there is more genuine therapeutic potential with MXE than with ketamine, partly because it feels more genuinely psychedelic and also because it seems easier to stay more lucid through the experience.

 

[Doldrugs]

as a Buddhist, I believe that in a very real sense the world we perceive is projection of our own mind. Quantum physics is now coming very close to a similar realisation.

No, it's not. The only people saying that are people who don't understand what quantum physics means.

 

[NiceEnough]

Fair enough. I can't really put into words the experiences I have had in meditation. But I am interested in getting a proper grip on quantum physics. That's my aim. Perhaps you are right, but the small things I have read seem to accord with my experiences on psychedelic drugs and meditation. So I am interested in finding out more. Not suggesting I am right or that my experience is more valid than any one else's, just wanted to share. Thanks for the correction. I will look into it.

 

[murphythecat]

I find it fascinating that mxe brings everyone to realize much the same thing.

but mind is not empty, its naturally calm, happy and pure. we see it as empty when we try to perceive and analyse. but the feeling is not empty only we view it like that because we experience it without stilling the mind. we must still the mind with meditation in order to penetrate what emptiness means. its empty only of a separate self, of a entity, us, our ego. the illusion of a self separated from everything else is the illusion and is empty of any reality. but the mind is not empty, its happy only we cluster it with all unnecessary thoughts and desire which makes it unhappy, stressed.

MXE could really help a lot of person in our society. I think of all the old depressed people stuck in retired house with not much dream or aspiration. MXE is very informative into the nature of our self and how our self and view points molds our perception of reality and affect our happiness

what a chemical! but moderation is key. the magic gets lots quite fast and then a manic over ego perception takes control and we tend to become a bit delusional merely because mxe still make me think much more then usual.

No, it's not. The only people saying that are people who don't understand what quantum physics means.

quantum physic learn us a whole lot about how perception affect reality.