My ego dissolution report!
Many years ago I had bought ,legally in those days,2cb,very strong indica weed,Beefit mushroom honey,english and hawaiian mushrooms.
I had taken already a dose of 20/25 mgs of 2-cb.
My best friend took 2 of the 4 2-cb pills but had to puke so I took the remaining two pills consisting of 10/12,5 mgs.
That's a dose of 30/37,5 of 2-cb in total!
We went to a snackbar to eat a snack on which i poured the honey!absurd combination of taste btw.
I remember seeing an old lady looking at me with wundering eyes and looking back at myself in the mirror seeing very big glowing pupils and...

My friend went home because he felt sick so I went to an other friend of mine!
I was eating the mushrooms one after another while offering my friend some!
He refused because he had to work the day after!
I ate them all,being used to fresh ones that were bigger in size!
So I didn;t realize what I had done until I walked down the stairs and started to experience a hissing sensation in my ears and black dots in my vision field,not once but 3 or 4 times.I saw the walls bubbling in and out,persian carpet visuals,necks expanding ren and stimpy cartoon-alike!
I was laughing hysterically.
Later my state became more and more depressed thinking about all the people I let down I started crying!
This friend sitting next to me felt uncomfortable and put his arm around me in a comforting kind of way!I thought it was pretty gay and bursted into laughter!
I don't remember details that much but I remember that language was slipping out of my hands,including the "Me" consisting of language!
Inside I felt like a washing machine at full speed,seeing for example a painting but couldn't associate it with any particular word because many words passed by in a whirling chaos!I kept on struggling for a while trying to keep myself together but that was impossible so I gave up and surrendered!Bad trip exit!!!
There was a simple state of pure being left,of deep silence that reminded me of early childhood!
There is not much to remember only that I looked at the clock(analog Model)and knew the time without thinking about it just by looking at it!
at 2.00/3.00 at midnight I was still mildly tripping but was back in ego-awareness!So the trip lasted from 11.00 in the morning or so till past midnight!
This was my only real ego-death under the influence of substance(s).
I would experience gradually deepening almost Ego-death 6/12 months later
without the aid of drugs!But instead of letting totally go the little bit of "Me" left became scared as hell and resisted/contracted and stopped the process of the merging of so called inner and outer worldawareness!With the help of big amounts of liquor!Oblivion here I come was the theme of that period!
End of this story


