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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards

The BDD Social & Information Booth - v.18 - The Penthouse

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I use meebo.com/messenger for AIM - it's browser based (runs in IE, firefox, etc) so you don't need to download anything :)
 
So I took ~7mg kp earlier, and the wobbly buzz lasted all of 4 hours, tops... derp.

Guess I'm not gonna bother wasting that anymore. Hardly worth it at all.
 
Goodmorning my loves :)

How are you all doing today? I knocked out QUITE early last night after eating 7-8mg KP and 30mg Baclofen hehe. Felt nice while I was still awake though. Back to .5-.75mg kp/day for a while though for sure.

My back is sore as hell (oh right, it's the morning)...
 
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I need to not binge on my kpins... I set aside 20 for my last 10 days before refill... I have 13 left..

I'm quite the hypocrite at time. :(
 
Breakfast of champions.

My pre-class breakfast was 15mg oxycodone and a super-fat bowl of dank herb. Only way I could deal with all of the retards I was surrounded with and still want to talk to people (weed helped my patience, oxy made me chatty).
 
Sounds like a great breakfast. Oxycodone always gets me going. I take 10mg diazepam daily, so that synergizes nicely with the bupe. I considered taking an extra 10mg, but I feel I should save the extra diazepam during a time when I can relax and smoke some medical doja over it
 
I completely agree - subs mute EVERYTHING for me except: benzos, ketamine, MDMA

LSD is useless, weed feels "like something" but just makes me hungry (not a bad thing considering my diet is absolute shit...).

I'm liking / not liking this "self-medicating" bit. Been taking 7.5mg Oxycodone to help w/ the days until my tramadol metabolizes enough "o-dt" to actually kill pain, but I'm starting back into the psychological addiction to it. :(

Can't use subs either, as it'll completely negate any of the Tramadol I take, and I'm trying so g'damn hard to get on a legit pain-maint schedule / program.
 
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A was talking more on the diazepam haha. Like for example 30mg of sublingual diazepam with some potent weed is a favorite of mine. That's too bad to hear that happens to you though, I enjoy weed and bupe just like I enjoy any other opioid + weed synergy. Although bupe is not as euphoric as other full agonist opioids. I use it recreationally (depends on dosage) and especially to withdrawal from full agonist opioids I've been using (heroin, oxymorph, morphine, oxycodone, fent, ect.). It also does wonders for my depression.
 
I find bupe only worsens my depression.

Ah well, chalk it up to the "drugs effect everyone a bit differently" token.

Mods (collectively) : THANK YOU! hahahha, y'all the best. :)
 
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Exactly. We both share a love for that good ole' oxycodone though haha. I used to enjoy trams, but they make my anxiety sky rocket and make me super jittery/twitchy in dosages above 100mg. I think it's due to my benzo addicition and trams SNRI stimulant-like properties. Does wonders for my withdrawals if used with high doses of benzos
 
I use my Tramadol as Rx'd - 50mg as needed. Supposed to be every 4-6 hours, but I usually don't make it 3 before re-dosing.

My issue is that I also use oxy in the meantime for mornings / BT pain. Much less now that the trams are actually doing something positive for me, but I still need that something extra. I'm REALLY hoping that I can get hydrocodone 5mg combined with ~400mg ibuprofin for mornings and BT pain. 5-10mg in the morning, and another 5 later in the day (a bit after noon) would get me right where I need to be to resume functioning as a productive member of society. I'm almost at that point now, but I still feel debilitated / useless because of my whole body feeling like a box of ass... :\

Oh, but because I'm 22 and smoke weed they all think I'm just looking for drugs. Hey assholes, I'm not going in asking for Roxycodone 30mg IR.. I just want some basic fckin meds that actually work!

I also have pretty big problems with anxiety - even taking my .5mg KP this morning I'm getting the classic "pounding chest" from being on edge of a nervous break down. Granted I binged on them yesterday (I do it maybe once a month), so a little rebound anxiety is to be expected, but I shouldn't feel as though doing anything but listening to music and talking to people on BL is "too much" for me to handle. One of these days I'll be able to get a proper job. AND THEN LEAVE this god-forsaken cold-ass part of the world. I wanna head south, SO BAD.

I should have used all the $$ I get from car repair and parts swapping / flipping to move to Arizona, Utah, NM, or Texas when I had the chance. Now I'm waiting to get my proper welding certification so I can move anywhere and be guaranteed to find work.

Got my own plan, now just need a loyal companion... (One thing at a time though I guess.. - my OCD allows me to focus on ONE thing at a time though. I'll either be 100% enthralled by some female, or have ZERO interest in women and only want to work on my car, or whatever. I "cycle" as my doctors have all put it).
 
Hola NT. How are you today?

My mother has THE BEST skill at pissing me the fuck off instantly in the morning. She wants my help / advice for something, but then basically goes against everything I tell her, and tried to defend her decisions with nonsensical bullshit. SO FCKING ANNOYING.

If people don't want my advice (I'm a fucking mechanic...) then don't ask it. HATE being put down before it's even fucking noon. Grrrrrr. (This is why I drink when I do drink... if I had beer I'd be cracking a few open right about now and it's like 10:30am...)
 
Ugh I despise doctors that write you off as a "drug addict" because you smoke weed. My psychiatrist has threatened to cut me off from my Valium script after my mom STUPIDLY told him that I had been admitted into detox for heroin; forced by my mother or I was out of the house, therefore I had no option because I'm a freshman in college with a part-time job. They gave me 20mg Roxicodone, 2mg Ativan, and 10mg Ambien. What the fuck kind of detox is that?! They tapered my Roxicodone down to the 5mg pills, but I was railing the prescription I took home. The doctor tried to taper me off a year-long benzo prescription/addiciton with fucking lorazepam in a matter of like 2 weeks when I was previously on the longer acting diazepam (which is the most sensible and clinically correct benzodiazepine to use other than librium for tapering). Ignorant foreign dumbass of a doctor he was. Probably just an insensitive money-hungry bastard concerned more about his million dollar car and house.
 
My pain doctor reminds me of the quintessential cop: fatty that got made fun of, and wants to exert his "power" upon others now that he's older and not being picked on. He's a complete dick and a "know it all" - little does he know that I know more about the meds that I want to be taking (/need) than he does.

He adamantly argued that Tram's mild SNRI profile would "have absolutely ZERO effect on my depression" - to which I just laughed inside and said "well, I can only hope, because it would be wonderful if it helps this absurd chronic pain AND my depression, but thanks for the negativity."
 
Once my psychiatrist told me "It takes a month to get addicted and expirience withdrawals from heroin" That's when I knew he was useless other than the fact that he scripts my valium.
 
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