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๐ŸŒŸ๐ŸŒŸ Social ๐ŸŒŸ๐ŸŒŸ The 2025 Recovery & Social Thread

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I'm a different case here, back at the somewhere end of february 2025 I had a what was, full-body attack suddenly. So it all started bit earlier in that day where I've noticed I couldn't swallow properly and felt that "globus" sensation being hand to hand with chewing issues. That was day Z and am gonna come back to this.

further back I think, even could be one day before when I've eaten some french fries and noticed I couldn't chew and walk food back and forth in my mouth like i've used to, but anyway I did ate a bit of those and rest threw them, for reasons such as not being fresh and me that ok i can't eat them so why did i make them? Day after I continued my routine.. nestle cini minis again chewing issues, after that couldn't take a piece of fried egg.. said to myself hmm maybe some influenza and yes am not gonna use it as a main weapon here but it was a factor. After february ended I've went on a liquid diet of kefir/some muller protein shake. Some natural juice and vitamin water and store-bought water like i was until now, I never drank tap water unless by some extreme circumstances. I could sleep either 4 to 12hrs during that cronology, haven't had fever nor headaches or they were unnoticeable on common reason such as me evaluating how I got here and those could be by not knowing when to stop taking ambroxol or strepsils.. I still took them crushed in water, all these played the violin of death next to my bed slowly. Possibly shaworma as well, fast food.. I never was into but I had a few constant days where I've only eat either 800g of beef/lamb shaworma or some mc/kfc but in less quantity than shaorwma they were 1 time buy, again.. we spin in same cercle. Anyway after I couldn't take anymore and didn't wanna die like a rat in house i've w ent to infectious disease hospital, that was 6 march.. (Quick add > I was still able to smoke and still am, I've read weird side-effects of quitting tobacco as well be prepared and look online or in-person to pneumology, GERD is one of those yes and not rare or very, is met in about 40% of cases, I don't think is directly either but side effects exists that what I know and if I do quit, I gotta take necessary steps)


During 6 march, when I felt on edge of death and saw how voluntarily I let myself in this position I've finally went to ER and got a wrong diagnosis such as tonsilitis. Dude prescribed me basic throat infection tools such as tantum verde/ospen 1000/some plant-based lozenges which we haven't bought, because I've choke on a strepsils pill by mistake a few days back in February( when I didn't had any of this), and yes I got scared and for good reasons, meds are like yin-yang so I don't miss much by not taking those, I still had other 2. Say "we" because at time I couldn't possibly had money since I've couldn't do shit and had no elbow to borrow from someone and luckily my family bought those, anyway after I still wasn't prepared to have the confruntation of swallowing and so we bought prescription on 7 but i only started on 8 and ended course on 12, so 5 days, me thinks they must did something, the box consisted of 12 film coated pills and i had to take 40 total, imagine.. so we crushed them once 6hrs and on 12 i've went to ENT which finally said that I didn't had any infections nor anything but my acid reflux which responded back by burning my still burned left tonsil.. :( yes so she adviced me to see gastro and am gonna go there but am not sure yet. She prescribed me some Controlac along with some oil based nose spray, which you don't get much reward since there's risk of aspiration next. Only reason is that natural elements are less likely to have rebound, so that's only finish line. In next 2 to 3 days I still haven't ate much, I did bought some ready-frozen Shanghai chicken which dumb ass me didn't thought it was spicy but nothing happen, I did ate it like a little spider doing his web and after I let that idea go and tried some simple chicken. which I still can't eat it optimally since those little threads of chicken present a rivaly to swallow them, but I can eat overall now. After 12, I got some sunflares. I also cried of happiness 1 day ago and about 3 because I could do my mediocre things again after laying in bed for hours ready to jump in front of car because I didn't know what was happening to me. That spark of non-existent hope was made possible by my body giving me a 2nd chance and I gratefully appreciate it by letting go of toxic food. Because after 12, I started to try and eat, and around 20ish.. I got some courage to eat some sweets, to eat some chicken. I still don't drink soda, but now my sweets are either kids barni/honey/maia croissants or whole grain idk, is a European ingredient, whole grain bread and turkey ham/nuggets/fish fingers. After few days I've tried to swallow some drotaverine pills which I changed my method, now I lick them and clear my mouth before-hand, and then swallow with a full glass of water.

But main fire was in one night when I took a single PPI and that was it, it all started from there.. and now am here.

I tried my best to summerise how I could, I think I succesfully do, is still a long story this is nothing. But I try to recover and thinkin about going to doc.



I felt somehow less focused and had some brain fog for about 80% of time, still do but less, say less for me.. is still here but am doing my best to avoid it or if I do see myself in it try and take a shortcut to escape, this is also environmental impact of where am I, that being home, for such long time
 
Today I ate some fish fingers, and all of sudden they had this tiny speck of crunchy pane, and it hit my unaffected right tonsil, I did spit it out though at least from what I know, it was lodged between my teeth at gum floor level, luckily, but it hit there. I am ok for moment hope am, on future I'll try to rip the pane side off and only eat fish. Maybe canned is a better option too. This was a more aggresive event in last days, other than 1 day back some crunchy nuggets which well.. Since I could eat thinkin am ok, today I made them again but softer, initially they were still a most decent shape than previous one but not by much, still had a bit of crunch but ate it.

For chicken gonna see alternative eventually.. if anyone has any realistically options.

Btw, all these remodeled how I do my routine. I am still not afraid to swallow small pills (3mm) or whatever, but only do it if I have to. Thinking about buying gaviscon but gonna do a further investigation.

Now I had my last sip of coffee, then water... today I dont have almond drink but gonna buy in morning. My coffee is like sissy too, is made with store-bought water and 1.5% quality milk.

]A short story, I did some tests these days and ate in small amounts some salami /1 egg omelette, nestle cini minis, had no reactions but still is a no for now.

Also will stay away from soda for a undefined period.
 
oh That makes sense if it allows you to work in withdrawal.

What about effects on the GI tract? Thatโ€™s a โ€œshittyโ€ side effect of WD.

sorry if you already said but I forgotโ€ฆ.was your friend high / drunk that resulted in the crash?


Iโ€™ve blown up an airbag from a fender benderโ€ฆthat shit hurts and also burned me really badly in the hand. Had bruised everywhere m v g

The best thing about the meth route is when you dose while you starting withdrawal. You will shit like your entire gi tract out right then and there. I know it's really gross and sorry if its tmi but the meth will push out anything you have to worry about. It also dehydrates you so you don't have to piss all the time but you do have to stay on top of your fluids. My least favorite part of the withdrawal besides the excruciating pain and temperature regulation how horrible my head and brain feels. I can't ever get anything done or focus on anything. Meth completely removes that if I'm feeling cold and turkey skinned it takes that away immediately too. It gives you some pain relief in the first few hours but you'd have to re dose to full stop pain.


I'm not recommending anyone try this unless you are addicted to meth or an experienced meth users that can handle the mental side effects which you may also experience.
Your not going to sleep for two weeks not joking. There will be occasional pass outs

But yeah we were like super messed up. Like blasted on H and we drink did xan too. It all happened so fast like I was trying to like chill and do homework, I haven't seen my friend in ten years, He came back from Austin TX. Obviously because of who I am he wanted to get messed up with me we went out to the bars and stuff and gambled. I didn't think anything was going to happen while coming off the freeway onto are street. He was sorta drifting but not really. something street like caught tires and he was going to pretty fast in this loud ass evo. we like started lose control of the tires and hit i guess like cement wall or whatever thing blocking the road was there. The car flipped and spun and I think we both blacked out a little bit. I just got cut by glass and probably hit my head a little my head hurts. I was able to crawl out he got kinda messed up but like not going to the er messed up. I called an uber we dipped. I think hes going to go to rehab or something he's busted.

I think everytime I'm in a major accident I'm super intoxicated on H or xan. I think it lubricates your body for the crash cus I never really get hurt I just wake up and am like "oh shit" lol.
I'm aware I'm lucky though I try not to be in any crashes I'm like a grandma driver unless its rush hour traffic.
 
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I generally support legality of drugs but the penalty for drunk and high driving are far too lenient imo. Probably one one of the worst things addicts do to society. Ppl with multiple dui should be doing very hard time.

Addicts are hated so much just on principle but drunk driving is some socially acceptable joke and it sickens meโ€ฆ.its worse than anything most junkies ever do.

Iโ€™ve done it and itโ€™s such a regret of mine even though I didnโ€™t hurt anyone
 
just wanna add something else too, beneath your chin we all have some lymph nodes. My left one was basically glued to my neck, like someone is crushing my throat with his hands. Still is in same position but I guess since size dim down should represent some message such as healing or idk yet.

I dont know because I didnt had any ultrasounds as of yet and I must do one, part of me thinks there's nothing there but where tonsil is still burned that node is reacting to inflammation.

I've noticed sometimes both swell tiny bit, not much but that bit where I do feel it if I swallow even my saliva in the position of me looking left and bit down.

Today I've woken up ok, had a sleep from 2AM until 12:10PM, I noticed no swelling in right one.
Gonna try again some extra options to chicken

as of right now I took some turkey breast and ham, with some sour cream on bread to get them at room temperature, gonna take a while but is start of my day.
 
I'll see if I will do an egg today or not depends, at same time I don't have any anxiety from this, since I can again eat but gotta keep my eyes wide open at what I insert in my mouth.

This attack of mine was me I belive mostly caused by this influenza, I saw how globally there were separated strains such as America with bird flu, most EU countries doing regulations such as to wear mask and even lockdowns. 2025 was fucked up, and who wasn't affected should start to ask themself why and take care how they do things in the near future
 
apparently it seems i did have some gastritis slash possible mild infection somewhere, if is a big IF maybe big as my middle finger.

but this diet i like it

from now on i am gonna keep it on side, but for at least 3 months gonna eat only this.

So whole grain bread, i tried in sandwich toaster and seems more palable and no isn't placebo is what is

mashed potato/rice/fish, mainly am a fish finger adept because they do not contain any weird things fish might have and it happens they're more clean than store-bought fish and offer same benefits, if not for some exclusive species. There's other marine things more ok than fish overall but will not get into that for moment like mentioning what.

also chicken ham/turkey ham.

i never ate any of because am simply not used to marine food although if cooked properly i can maybe relax eating some octopus or those shell things oysters, never did but will try in near future. Def will, anyway i for now traded soda for sweets basically, and i eat sweets but i mentioned above what and their more friendly than what is on market. I tried digestive biscuits but hit some dead ends such as them having tiny bits of apple fiber or being too crunchy, i also tried oreo but nahh. I do my best to avoid rigid things i'd use instead of crunchy, and if, maybe to be just tiny bit such as my toasted sandwiches which i simply made them a bit softer because i think maybe since i never ate whole grain bread, this type is more difficult to chew than white bread that probably everyone knows it.

I am now on my computer, I try to get my mind off, I've used it in last days, about 30m ago I did ate some nuggets again(about 4) but this time made them softer, they still had that 1 fuckin cursed piece of pane rigid but not like my previous ones, also I've noticed they contain paprika apparently both in taste and firstly i saw on envelope and was a mirage, but also my fish fingers too, but they happen to have turmenic. I succesfully ate those, I'd still like to explore alternatives but blended chicken isn't for me, i cannot under any form eat that i'd not fed it to a dog either. If I was to have a tonsillectomy then maybe but until then is still a up-side universe where i'd have that, but keep in mind if i do have some i'll get them out but i don't think i'd require. fuckin 2025... at same time thanks for giving me some new light in my life, i think this was not a pre-written experience, i've learned and wasn't for nothing. I appreciate my life same but am more grounded of what I do. Early I did have some brain fog as if I forgot to put my almond drink to fridge all of sudden, although guess what? it was. I also need choline you know, is part of human brain but salami apprently is processed food same as sausages, maybe end of month i'll try bit of beef.

today i bought some that i don't think it has, i usually buy fish fingers from frosta but today i got from negro 2000, 200g extra too for about 1eur and bit less than frosta.

maybe i'll try some vegetables if i can chew how i should, cabbage.. uh

carrots or frozen vegetables just fry them for 2-3m at low stove and that's it. I plan to take a walk tomorrow or even a bit nite, is nite already but gonna see.. will get me ready to eat some fish fingers in about 1hr and that's how i end my day. Maybe a slice of honey but again.. idk, tomorrow is still a day.

today i did ate about 2 croissants, 3 barnis, is something. I do need sugar, human body does.

idk if we can post music here

but this is what i listen and simply upload it here for no reason, voyager.

 
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I am 10 days sober from everything (other than suboxone). This is the longest period of total abstinence I've had in over 15 years.

God grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
 
I am 10 days sober from everything (other than suboxone). This is the longest period of total abstinence I've had in over 15 years.

God grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

is a progress, try some other things that get your small brain tickled such as yoga or accupuncture

i never had it but heard is god-like
 
Been dealing with a dude at my sober living house that has definitely relapsed on something. No one in their right mind cleans a storage room to make room from r offices at 1:30am.
So I've been avoiding him man, I've wanted to slap the goddamn sunglasses off his face when he wears them indoors all the time. Like he's got something to hide I bet.
Just trying to not to let it bother me much.
 
Just trying to not to let it bother me much.

That sounds Horrrible. I hope that you are okay and that you survived it.

Please get better and stay safe. You have to make it through. I'm so sorry

that happened. Sounds really really rotten. But ...

you can do this alright.

You can to. Right. I hope everything is not still rotten.

Oh and it doesn't sound like he's living too sober.

Bye bye
ttyl
 
Been dealing with a dude at my sober living house that has definitely relapsed on something. No one in their right mind cleans a storage room to make room from r offices at 1:30am.
So I've been avoiding him man, I've wanted to slap the goddamn sunglasses off his face when he wears them indoors all the time. Like he's got something to hide I bet.
Just trying to not to let it bother me much.
Stay strong. Obviously you're doing the right thing and it seems to be paying off. Just try and ignore him, I know it sucks and can stress you out but he'll probably get kicked out or something. Still not a pleasent experience especially if he goes into WD. Anyway good luck :)
 
Still not yet to doc, will head to in about 2 days, gotta go until easter time which is on sunday this year..

today was a pretty balanced day i haven't had in long while. I ate some store-bought mapple syrup pates, two, then a croissant,a barni cake and that's it for sweets. I then got a bit "pale" because i did my camolini rice(about half a cup, and say two fingers) in a pan that wasn't designed for nothing unless you heat tea or water or soup, already made ahaha and no, I tried, is ours.

anyway so i still keep that for her use mentioned above that I did in past-time and that was, then I got my pasta pan and did a cup in that and basically while boiled I ate about 3 nuggets, then after 1hr when by that time it was prepared only to steam-down i had a cordon bleu, a single piece out of 250g pack, I did had 1 previous nite too. No reaction sort of again, keep things minimal and a cold air wave is on me now when I listen to my music, I get in my corner of mind and after what I live, I think is a portal to my self-past in terms of "health performance", more or less?

anyway ate about half a plate of rice and that cordon bleu which was ok, 1 cup of kefir now during nite time when gotta hit bed in about 2hrs, I had some chamomile tea, 1 cup and a bit now, will drink a bit more because with this polar wave in Europe we get like you place a thing on table and in 5m is cold if it was room temp or even a bit heated, say if I toast a sandwich which I did hey.

not 1 time more..

also to explore my horizon before all these foods, I started with a single piece of cheese and 4 salami slices.. but then I decided since salami is already made as pre-apocalyptic food better eggs, wanted to have one nite but decided to get some turkey ham as last meal. ate a bit less bread but again what I did ate and because i only now have whole grain bread in my outfit, fibers shouldn't be a problem.

I get some pains I did had in past in my jaw i started noticing maybe some unwritten dental issue i have that's not a threat to myself, also sinuses. Doctors will get puzzled regardless and those machine will tell me if nada or go with wave(is my anatomy since end of february) which i raise my eyebrow but again i shouldn't because we ain't robots, that's the magic of being human. I still am optimisic and will be.

i had a domestic fight with my family two days ago and police got here apparently because of neighbors although highly raise a hand and say I did it but meh, I did made a mess. Almost broke fridge, threw coffee pot my wife got scared and both my kid ran off to someone but again imagine to live what I live and then talk. Police haven't gave me any fines or warnings, they asked if my family wants to make a complaint and they denied, they sort of see that bro i am a ghost now but i still survive. Think twice that I back in march wanted to jump in front of car :)

said is this my end? is a calculated one?
 
also broke my living room door window but these can multiply and relive in another places, we as humans can't.

now is ok, i will not do like that again but is impossible for even if someone was in my position to not do at least something partially that can alter someone life...

i talked with them and even by my face they knew what i wanted to transmit and that was.. I fixed those with duct tapes, change the extension cord of both tv/fridge in kitchen.

fridge i guess still works but probably from the impact of door it made it in a way that has less dexterity but still keeps food cold, I have about 2 fingers of water in my freezer and is frozen since that day.

dusted behind what was and buf.

duct tape part because my kitchen is kinda small and at moment at least didn't have any hot glue or a 2m wide extension plug for them. Maybe some coffee got into it, i saw basically i filled at least 70% of kitchen with it and got that extension cord in my room because i ain't plugging a fridge, a lamp and my chargers.

i also let go of aromatherapy machine, only stick to incense as i did all these years and yeah, today gonna see what i can do about another extension cord for washing machine and plug it because i gotta wash, and have no towel, only my face/hand one and even so is too thick.
 
gonna piss play a bit on pc, have maybe my last cigar but again i try not to smoke anymore before bed, even 2hrs doesn't mean anything, initially i wanted 1hr but keep things in a diagram from now on.

am playin penumbra black plague :D

had to watch some yt playthrough bc reasons
 
made appointment to dentist and another ent, am thinking a second time given the strategy my body had, it could be something and is.. I say by now, non-serious, i'll go to gastro as well but am skeptical for moment since I can eat sweets, maybe will try a can of diet pepsi idk yet, at least not until I come back from clinic and then we see what and how.

I guess maybe if is a tooth or a stone, maybe this ENT will not miss it since is a private clinic too, is on my health assurance. Doesn't mean shit since same doc work in both environment most of their careers but at least I will eliminate potential throat incorrections. Then we see, if is stomach well and was serious I even read on reddit such as those with GERD not being able to eat, be prepared for landing! Bread, yes.. is what is.

is last step and I gotta do it, also blood works too eventually.
 
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