Discussion mostly are done by a person, prepared and to a group (or maybe one on one) about a subject. The discussion leader keeps things on topic. Something within a relation I don't see happening without a mediator around.
So its not a serious discusion, does sound like something triggered the flight fight response during. Not the right circumstance for a good talk.
I now would excuse myself politely, use the standard phrase 'we ll talk bout it when the cicumstances are calm and acceptable for me. Turn and leave the place for a while'.
Then I didnt know this and went all in try to act reasonable/ trying to stay on topic [basickly throwing Gasoline on her fire] which led to 1 1/2 hour of screaming from her with the kids around. The real victims.
@Jnowhere having an arguement, how many words are used for these kinda situations, in a different context then their meaning. Its about summing up why you are right. I somehow feel this will only contribute the fight. The point the situation seems now is beyond btw. Mediation/ seperation?
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I would just tell her I never read them, and it is nice when you shut up, ah peace and quiet. Oh the silent treatment, good you never shut up, then laugh."
So nicely worded, this is fameliar ground glad me and my ex seperated. Otherwise that cycle would have gone on (she still tries) but its broken. And besides loosing my kids, i feel sort of free. Cant totally deny it happened it left a scar.
A conflict [between 2 people] as the dictionary explains is when both are devoted to come to some mutual ground. Again not a fight. But that sounds more like how you interpret it. But dont know if the same goes for her.
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@RyGly76 and F4E1 are human woman complicated or not? ]
The spoken word already inadequate at times, written words are worse.
And mobiles '
the thought removal device, Beato, R.'
Texting is done (not by all) most seemingly in the spore of the moment. Better ignore, I deleted them for myself. One time reading was a mistake, re-reading them would be stupid . And I like being as a Donkey, never bumping to the same rock again.
Hope you don't share kids, as it complicates things.