I'm cautious to put pen to paper in this life time knowing the way my mind works as a addict. I mean will I ever really be truly free ? I highly doubt that , it's a matter of finding a method that works to continue on with your life and the important things.

i feel you. i'm trying to get a year under my belt before I even begin to think I may be "normal". at 8 months some days are easy but the next day may be very hard.. its a fight worth fighting though
i'm also waiting until the year mark before I start dating again..
I know there are more folks out there! let's keep 'em coming!!!!! 
Well done on waiting the year to start dating. So many people ignore this advice and it usually ends badly with a lot of hurt all around.
^congrats on 2 years thats awesome.
i completely agree with that last part. i got that exact feeling after i finished writing my 3rd step. i had been trying to control some shit and it just wasnt working out in my favor and it was tearing me up. it got taken out of my hands and basically i had to let it go. at that point i finished writing my 3rd step and i felt this awesome peace. its hard to describe but i was just cool with everything.
the saying that got me was "you can feel the pain of being dragged for awhile or you can just let go."
yeah i gues i should of told OD to post an update.
my court date has been delayed. twice now. the first time was when i was writing my third step. and then it just happened again. my new court date is may 11th.
I'm cautious to put pen to paper in this life time knowing the way my mind works as a addict. I mean will I ever really be truly free ? I highly doubt that , it's a matter of finding a method that works to continue on with your life and the important things.
^^AgentSquish how are you feeling two years out? Do you have any lingering physical symptoms?
