• The Dark Side 💕 Welcome Guest 💕
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    Notable Threads Urgent Hotlines
    Bereavement Mindfulness
    Suicide Support Anger Management
  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

TDS Social~EveryOne Look at Your Neighbor With Love

Status
Not open for further replies.
I'm sorry I hate AA (Alcoholics anonymous). Theres nothing wrong with the people or the group, it's just the fact that i'm an ADDICT. and when I say i'm an addict at AA meetings I get fucking scolded like a cat.

Theres a "Big Book Study" type meeting tonight at 7:15 that i'm required to go to, I fucking hate this shit.
I wish the people here would let you choose what program you wanted to work.
 
^Yeah I know what you mean, I hated identifying as an alcoholic at AA meetings. Some meetings seem to be more tolerant if you identify as a combined alcoholic/addict.
 
I'm putting most of this under a cut on the off chance that it is triggering to any alcoholic or addict. It describes my brief time in AA.

NSFW:
I was so depressed that I was practically begging to drink. I came home crying nearly every time. I did share my story and my emotions candidly. It did not stop creepy men from trying to hit on me and the friend I went there with. One ex-military dude in particular was quite aggressive in his advances toward my friend, who was my support system (she's not much of a drinker) and she didn't deserve it at all. She should have rebuffed him a bit less gently. She lost a brother to an oxycontin overdose (we all went to high school together on the East Coast) the day before his MBA graduation would have occurred.

I met some nice people, mostly college students. It was a meeting for atheists and agnostics in Berkeley, CA, so religion was not pushed on me.

I am expressive in my emotions and I have zero fear of public speaking (obviously, lol) so I somewhat stuck out in the crowd. I also have a very severe and direct stare. I spoke personally with a lot of folks. One in particular was a nice dude in his 40s who lived, literally, in a box under a bridge. I let him bum some cloves off me and he knew not to creep. The meeting leader was also quite a nice dude with 20+ years of sobriety, and the speakers were of high quality. It would have been a better fellowship if there weren't regulars that came to the meetings blindly drunk.


D's, there are ways to work the program for sure. Others can likely offer more support in that regard. You know you have my full support as your friend and how to reach me. Never give up on improving your life!

On a lighter note, I like the music! I'd love to attend a doof someday. I know I would have a wonderful time. And PiP, I've never actually heard Crowley's voice but I think you've got that one correct.

~peace and love to all - presently helping babysit~
 
well i got fired for being accused of stealing a useless fuckng nail gun. Fuckin cokehead whose worked there for 3 years said i did it - and since im new on the crew my boss "can't take any risks" - right i was only lugging 50lb bundles up 50 foot ladders under the table and I'm a risk now.... fucking day can blow me.
 
Mariposa said:
I'm putting most of this under a cut on the off chance that it is triggering to any alcoholic or addict. It describes my brief time in AA.

NSFW:
I was so depressed that I was practically begging to drink. I came home crying nearly every time. I did share my story and my emotions candidly. It did not stop creepy men from trying to hit on me and the friend I went there with. One ex-military dude in particular was quite aggressive in his advances toward my friend, who was my support system (she's not much of a drinker) and she didn't deserve it at all. She should have rebuffed him a bit less gently. She lost a brother to an oxycontin overdose (we all went to high school together on the East Coast) the day before his MBA graduation would have occurred.

I met some nice people, mostly college students. It was a meeting for atheists and agnostics in Berkeley, CA, so religion was not pushed on me.

I am expressive in my emotions and I have zero fear of public speaking (obviously, lol) so I somewhat stuck out in the crowd. I also have a very severe and direct stare. I spoke personally with a lot of folks. One in particular was a nice dude in his 40s who lived, literally, in a box under a bridge. I let him bum some cloves off me and he knew not to creep. The meeting leader was also quite a nice dude with 20+ years of sobriety, and the speakers were of high quality. It would have been a better fellowship if there weren't regulars that came to the meetings blindly drunk.


D's, there are ways to work the program for sure. Others can likely offer more support in that regard. You know you have my full support as your friend and how to reach me. Never give up on improving your life!

On a lighter note, I like the music! I'd love to attend a doof someday. I know I would have a wonderful time. And PiP, I've never actually heard Crowley's voice but I think you've got that one correct.

~peace and love to all - presently helping babysit~
Click to expand...

thanks maripoosa, yeah it's just the fact that everyone here where i live is working an AA program, and I'm working an NA program. I feel like the outsider/outcast. how i'm not working the "perfect program". shit piss's me off.

theartofwar said:
well i got fired for being accused of stealing a useless fuckng nail gun. Fuckin cokehead whose worked there for 3 years said i did it - and since im new on the crew my boss "can't take any risks" - right i was only lugging 50lb bundles up 50 foot ladders under the table and I'm a risk now.... fucking day can blow me.
Click to expand...

a fucking nail gun? man gotta make sure to lock shit up, or let your boss man know your using something.

someone stole our cart at work today (where we put all of our tools on). lucky there were no tools on the cart.. but still now we have to tote shit all over the fucking place. sucks.

sucks man, construction is a good thing though. you have the skills needed to find a job just about in any jobsite. hell most temp services are construction, or plant work nowdays. which inst so bad.
theres a temp service here "labor finders", and they clean up the construction site. they push a broom, but make $8.00 hr. which down here is damn good.

start looking for another job, and since ur last gave u hell about a fucking nailgun, then it wouldntve workd out in the long run.

Legerity said:
^Yeah I know what you mean, I hated identifying as an alcoholic at AA meetings. Some meetings seem to be more tolerant if you identify as a combined alcoholic/addict.
Click to expand...

some meetings are cool, while others hate it.

.
my momma got me a cellphone (i paid her back for it though), its a net10, samsung t410g. isnt a bad phone.. isnt fancy like the smart phones, but o well. if i invest the $ in a smart phone, they are just going to make a phone smarter. lol
its best to keep it classy.
 
Thing that bothers me is that he trusts this crackhead over me - this kid has routinely failed drug tests and I've been given one twice now (passed , haven't used in weeks now). I don't need a fucking nail gun i HAVE one here , and if i was going to steal something I would make it worht my while and not do something that would risk my job !! I was making real solid money there but I can find another gig I've done roofing for years so I won't be running bundles more likely I'll do the roofing and stick with metal roofs.
 
theartofwar said:
well i got fired for being accused of stealing a useless fuckng nail gun. Fuckin cokehead whose worked there for 3 years said i did it - and since im new on the crew my boss "can't take any risks" - right i was only lugging 50lb bundles up 50 foot ladders under the table and I'm a risk now.... fucking day can blow me.
Click to expand...

Man that absolutely sucks!! Sorry to hear that. Fuck them though if they are going to be so clueless. Are you going to start looking for a new job?
 
Yeah, I have one old job I can probably walk onto - but I'm going to check out paper and I have a few apps to drop off tomorrow. I don't like not working, I like to stay as busy as possible. Still waiting to stop craving like crazy man, but tomorrow will be 3 weeks. I suppose that is something to be proud of - when i jones out i don't feel very proud of anything lol.
 
thx bro, I know that I have a long long way to go - I'm in that place where you only remember the good times , can't really remember getting dope sick , and ways to make money seem incredibly too good to turn down. It's fucked up, I want to be proud of a few weeks, but I am constantly aware of jekyl and hyde fighting.
 
Hahaha I love it that all these Loungerats are coming out of the woodwork today =D

You are always more than welcome in here lonewolf <3
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top