Stuck in a bind

[churchpk]

Hi,

I have been an alcoholic for about a year straight without missing a day (longest I went was 6 days last month) without consuming alcohol. I am 6'1 and weigh 170 lb. My usual drink per night is about half a 750 ml of crown royal (80 proof) mixed with a xanax bar or 1-2 mg klonopin or 20-35mg valium, whichever I choose to mix it with. The past 13 days I have gone without alcohol because I want to quit. This has led me to take more benzos and blast my benzo tolerance up a lot. I have a lot at my disposal and it's not helping. I've been taking upwards of 5-6mg of those said benzos in a night to compensate for the non-alcohol consumption due to the mental problem of me "needing" something. I am prescribed 2mg xanax a day and 0.5 mg klonopin a day, and the valium is off the street. I need to lower this tolerance because replacing alcoholism with benzos is not the answer. I just feel like it's getting out of control and I don't want to suffer through the benzo withdrawal which is hellish. How can I taper down safely?

 

[Lord Armagoth]

Man be careful. Mixing alcohol and benzos is a bad combination in the first place. Benzos have a wicked withdraw if you have been taking them for long periods of time. The withdraws can actually send you into a life threatening seizure if they are that bad. You will have cravings regardless of what you do. I have been an alcoholic/addict for many years and have dealt with addiction and withdraw more than I'd like to admit. I would suggest taking smaller doses of the benzos every couple of days and just stick to one so you can monitor your intake precisely. If you really need to take benzos for medical reasons take them as prescribed and if your addiction wont let you try asking your doctor for something non narcotic. Its a bitch man I know from experience. The cravings will subside over time, but as long as your taking high doses of benzos you will get no where. If you care to do a quick withdraw consult a physician or a pharmacist about what you've been taking exactly and for how long, they should give you good advice. You don't want to end up in the hospital just to come off the drugs. Be safe man and I wish you luck, from one addict to another.

 

[churchpk]

Yeah, I know it's bad to mix them. I never overdo it though, at most I'd take 2mg xanax when drinking, and did that for a year straight with no issues. The problem is the depression I get at night from not drinking, so I take the benzos to feel SOMETHING, you know? I don't want my scripts cut cause I do suffer GAD and panic so I do need them, and if they hear I'm a recovering alcoholic I don't know how that will blow over. I just need to know the proper way to taper down without having this horrible depression at night time and insomnia of the psychological thinking of "if I don't take enough benzos I won't sleep" phase.

 

[edgewise1]

Have you shared this with your doctor? If so you might ask about Baclofen. This is a type of muscle relaxer. I am prescribed this drug for spasticity, but a search will find you info on the drug's role in alcoholism. Good luck on getting off alchol. Keep posting and let us know how you are doing.

 

[T. Calderone]

^Good suggestion with baclofen. When I was drinking heavily, I was scared of alcohol withdrawals. I was able to slow it down but had trouble quitting completely. I had read about how baclofen was administered to alcoholics in hospital setting. My dad had some baclofen that he gave me and it really helped the cravings. Eventually I slipped back though.

I know this is something you're reluctant to share with your doctor, that you've been mixing the pills with alcohol. Do you feel after these 13 days that you're strong enough not to drink? The fact that you're taking much more benzos to compensate is troubling and essentially you're trading one addiction for another. It would be ideal if you could only use these as prescribed.

 

[churchpk]

^I've tried Baclofen recreationally before, but never had alcohol dependence problem I don't believe. I'm not entirely sure how to gauge if I am dependent since I am hitting the GABA receptors with something it enjoys, the benzos. I'd like to get to the point where I can just take my bars and kpins a day and get my natural anxiety euphoria relief. It is now 2 weeks since I've drank, and I believe I can hold out much longer. I hesitate to say "hold out", cause this is probably going to be a life long struggle. But yeah, I don't want the doctor knowing I've been drinking whilst on these medications. I just feel everyday I have to take 3-5mg a day of any benzo just to feel ..not so depressed? I guess would be the best wording. The benzos will run out, that's when I get fearful haha. Especially taking so much per day. At least I've almost eliminated one addiction..just gotta figure out how to taper off benzos without medical supervision.