Staff Feedback Staffers abuse their roles here

[DrChivago]

It also didn't help hiring an 18 year old kid as an administrator. Who doesn't even do drugs, has zero leadership skill or experience, who claims be be friendly but is actually one of the most dishonest and manipulative people I've ever met, and who sneaks into your bedroom at might amd reads your PMs and diary. I think he did more damage to this site than anyone. I do give him kudos for building the discord, except I helped create it but I am banned from it. Nobody can tell me why. Oh and they allow hate speech towards women and refuse HR advise to law enforcement. Thats not very BL missiony is it?

Funny you mention discord... the "rules" on that dumpster fire are all over there place...

I used the word "nukka" as a bastardization of the n-word in a (more than obvious), joking fashion. And about half dozen people are reprimanding me for using a slur. Yet "ninja" used the exact same way all the time(and even by a moderator) is ok? And wouldn't ya know the post automated filter will catch the n-word... yet "honkey" and "cracker" aren't included in the parameters.

Too many gung-ho, uber sensitive Xpeople with double standards and no clue how to handle issues objectively. They genuinely have it for individuals who identify as "CIS" (aka normal heterosexual) and specifically males bc they are all "misogynistic". lol

As for this site- My introductory post was issued a warning. And I was just being goofy. Like, you fucking kidding me? That told me the temperature right away. This ain't my first pow wow. I was a moderator on Reddit for six years and got permanently banned along with my amateur chemistry sub. I'm fairly opinionated and like to think that I know my shit. But if I've learned anything from all this, it's that the Internet is complete trash now.

It used to be where everybody knew your name and we're always glad you came...

 

[alasdairm]

When my notifications are nothing but reply after reply from the same person harassing me

you're posting on a public discussion board. anybody is free to reply to your posts anytime they like. that's how public discussion works.

numerous replies to a post, assuming they are on topic and civil, do not constitute harassment.

I am never rude to anybody until they start it.

two wrongs have never made a right. if someone is rude to you, they're giving you the opportunity to lead by example and show that their attitude is unhelpful.

Yeah this feels condescending as fuck too.

i can't control your feelings but consider that i try to keep replies to issues like this as brief and as simple as possible so my point is made clearly.

please don't mistake that for condescension. i don't believe you're inferior. i don't know you.

Maybe I've only reported 3 posts in a year because reporting doesn't do jack shit, obviously?

it's neither obvious nor true.

in the case of your earlier reports, problematic images from another bluelighter were removed.

Not to mention staffers often go back & remove their own problematic posts, so how can I report that?

report it before it's deleted!

bluelighters and staff can go back and edit or delete posts. i do it frequently.

if somebody has a change of heart and removes their own rule-breaking or otherwise problematic content, i fully encourage that.

nobody really posts, or volunteers as a mod here, for the thanks. but, i'm certainly grateful for your contribution.

alasdair

 

[F.U.B.A.R.]

It's a sad fact of life that anyone in a position of authority will at some point abuse that position. Its called 'human nature', and it ain't pretty...

 

[mal3volent]

Foreigner - "No, just the TQ+... the LGB was not part of that. Virtually all of the controversies of the past 10 years have been TQ+ related."

I mean, is that not factually correct? Foreigner doesn't seem to be saying fuck trans people but rather just noting that they have been the center of attention for the past several years. I don't see how that is some big gotcha moment that you've chosen to highlight. You go on to dismiss what he actually said and then make up your own conclusions as to what he really meant. Pretty sure that's a form of manipulation and here you are accusing everyone else of being gaslighters.

deficit

Lol the fact you're going after deficit is crazy and just proves you're seriously just ignorant of the facts. Saying that he has harassed you is absurd. He doesn't like when people crash out like this in public and make a big spectacle of themselves. It's as simple as that. That's not harassment.

 

[DrChivago]

It's a sad fact of life that anyone in a position of authority will at some point abuse that position. Its called 'human nature', and it ain't pretty...

Equally as sad that people often need to be reminded of this.

All positions of power have perks. For some the lines get blurred where that authority stops.

 

[DrChivago]

I think that a big part of the problem is not so much the mods, but rather lack of oversight. To be clear, that is NOT a shot at admin either... Because it's difficult for most differentiate from the two. It's just a common situational void Ive noticed with almost all forums/platforms.

Resources to those channels are often confusing and or missing altogether. "Who watches the watchers?" type shit. Without that check and balance system, abuse of power is a valid threat

 

[Shambles]

I think that a big part of the problem is not so much the mods, but rather lack of oversight. To be clear, that is NOT a shot at admin either... Because it's difficult for most differentiate from the two. It's just a common situational void Ive noticed with almost all forums/platforms.

Resources to those channels are often confusing and or missing altogether. "Who watches the watchers?" type shit. Without that check and balance system, abuse of power is a valid threat

I actually have some sympathy for this point.

“Back in my day” BL was a much bigger site so even smaller forums tended to have multiple mods. This created a natural system of making sure no one mod could go too far off-piste without being reigned in a bit. At least in theory.

Nowadays forums - even busy ones - cannot justify more than a couple staff members. This could potentially be a problem, although I’ve seen no evidence for that so far.

Without going into too much detail, I can say that staff are absolutely monitored by other staff at every level. Believe it or not, we do not all agree on every issue but one thing we all agree on is upholding the BLUA and individual Forum
Guidelines. We can and do call each other out if we see an issue.

Staff are BLers first and foremost. Any that get lost in the sauce will simply find themselves stickless.

 

[DrChivago]

I actually have some sympathy for this point.

“Back in my day” BL was a much bigger site so even smaller forums tended to have multiple mods. This created a natural system of making sure no one mod could go too far off-piste without being reigned in a bit. At least in theory.

Nowadays forums - even busy ones - cannot justify more than a couple staff members. This could potentially be a problem, although I’ve seen no evidence for that so far.

Without going into too much detail, I can say that staff are absolutely monitored by other staff at every level. Believe it or not, we do not all agree on every issue but one thing we all agree on is upholding the BLUA and individual Forum
Guidelines. We can and do call each other out if we see an issue.

Staff are BLers first and foremost. Any that get lost in the sauce will simply find themselves stickless.

I was once a young mod for Reddit on a now, defunct amateur chemistry sub and we had 40K+ members. We often had a few squabbles between each other, but kept a unified front.

So I have danced the tango a few times. I'll admit there were times I was out of line and was checked by fellow mods. But it really takes a lot to knock me out of alignment. I can give it and take it just the same. Indifference and objectivity is the key.

And again to be clear, it was no knock against any of you guys I think you're doing a pretty good job. Well good enough anyways., lol. But yeah, it's a skeleton of what it used to be.

 

[Deleted member 554582]

That's why I like BL...here all are equal...let's stay aside for a while some problems with mods..unlike the real world outside we are equal here.Addictions, dependence, various health problems unite us...let's throw away everything that disrupts this-political shit...a so on...hatred about sexual orientation....or race...idk how a man could be affected of such insignificant things-this one is gay,this one is trans...who cares.I don't care at all.look about politics I often could really be pissed off...so politics away..like in rehab centre-young,old,smart and not so smart,black and white,gays and straight....but with same problem-drugs,alcohol,gambling....and health problems...like a hospital....and all helps each other...all are brothers and sisters....all are humans in the end.Let's keep BL a place like this-place for compassion,for help,for knowledge,for understanding...to forgive each others like real humanbeings

 

[DrChivago]

That's why I like BL...here all are equal...let's stay aside for a while some problems with mods..unlike the real world outside we are equal here.Addictions, dependence, various health problems unite us...let's throw away everything that disrupts this-political shit...a so on...hatred about sexual orientation....or race...idk how a man could be affected of such insignificant things-this one is gay,this one is trans...who cares.I don't care at all.look about politics I often could really be pissed off...so politics away..like in rehab centre-young,old,smart and not so smart,black and white,gays and straight....but with same problem-drugs,alcohol,gambling....and health problems...like a hospital....and all helps each other...all are brothers and sisters....all are humans in the end.Let's keep BL a place like this-place for compassion,for help,for knowledge,for understanding...to forgive each others like real humanbeings

What you said...

People need to wake the fuck up and realize it's the gatekeepers pitting us against each other. Not this petty shit. The same powers that be, a.k.a. the 1%, keep putting more and more distance between us and them. So much so, that in a few years there's bound to be a civil unrest in this country and maybe even globally. This whole political system needs to be burned to the ground and restructured for the success and equalization of humanity.

Nobody worried about increases of power of TCOs and China cuz we're busy fighting over Left/right, black/white, fat/slim, gay/straight. It's fucking stupid. It's just fucking pure idiocy and we sound like a bunch of fucking babies.

 

[Deleted member 554582]

What you said...

People need to wake the fuck up and realize it's the gatekeepers pitting us against each other. Not this petty shit. The same powers that be, a.k.a. the 1%, keep putting more and more distance between us and them. So much so, that in a few years there's bound to be a civil unrest in this country and maybe even globally. This whole political system needs to be burned to the ground and restructured for the success and equalization of humanity.

Nobody worried about increases of power of TCOs and China cuz we're busy fighting over Left/right, black/white, fat/slim, gay/straight. It's fucking stupid. It's just fucking pure idiocy and we sound like a bunch of fucking babies.id

I don't sure from Ur post do u agree with me or not.English is my third language...Let's say u will burn the whole political system....everyone can burn..but what u construct?Any practical ideas,which could be achievable?...if there is not not only vision,but something that could change current political system(in the global west) I guess u have in vain only chaos,anarchy,bloodshed,destruction and mass lootings..vices of all kind,dehumanisation etc....fuck the world outside...it is dying one way or another...sooner or later.I am not those visionary man who can lead the masses,not I could suggest the right political system.Do you?I am talking about behaving in this tiny/cozy huge space called "Blue Light" and how can interact more mercyful and like humans in it.That's all

 

[Jnowhere]

I think that’s a fault of moderation being human beings.

I recently had a problem with a 7 day ban for using three words that were interpreted as insult when they were used as moral rebuke.

The mod felt it was insult. Senior moderators wouldn’t touch it with a ten foot pole. No one could tell me what was insulting about my statement.

I don’t think issuing a warning was the right thing to do especially with the sites big push right now being support don’t punish.

I think I’m not going to participate much here anymore.
Or at least stay the fuck away from the “we’re so neutral” crowd on pc and e

Every interaction I have with that crowd goes terribly.

No, not here; perish the thought. lol

 

[Fire&Water]

Theatre fire!

 

[Jnowhere]

 

[kiely]

All of this reminds me of this game a teacher once played with her class.

She walked around the room and whispered into each student’s ear whether they were a witch or just a regular person.

Then she told everyone ….

Try to form the biggest group you can without a witch. If your group has even just one witch…everyone in that group fails

The energy of the entire room shifted. Everyone started interrogating each other.

Are you a witch?

How do we know you’re not lying?

Some students clung to one big group but most broke off into smaller… exclusive cliques….turning away anyone who seemed even the slightest bit uncertain, nervous or guilty.

All of the sudden everyone had became suspicious of everyone….whispering….finger pointing. Trust dissolved almost instantly.

Finally the teacher said,
“Alright, time to find out who fails. Witches, raise your hands.”

Not one hand went up.

The whole class exploded. “Wait! You messed up the game!”

And then the teacher asked
“Did I? Were there any actual witches in Salem, or did everyone just believe what they were told?”


That’s when it hit them. No witch was ever needed for the damage to happen. Fear had already done its work. Suspicion alone had divided the entire class… turning community into chaos.

This is exactly whats happening everywhere today.
Different words, same playbook.
Instead of “witch,” it’s liberal….conservative… vaxxed…unvaxxed…pro-this… anti-that.
The labels may change but the tactic is still all the same.

To get people scared….get them suspicious….get them divided.

Then just sit back while all the trust crumbles.

It wasn’t even the witches that were dangerous. It was all the rumors….the suspicion…the fear

We just keep falling for it. We’re killing each other. For absolutely no reason. We’ve got to stop playing these games. Refuse to hear the whispers.

Because as soon as we start hunting for witches….we’ve already lost.

And @kiely I totally get everything you said and feel exactly where you were coming from. It probably just went over a few heads is all lol. I get and love your sarcasm. Even it comes with good intent. You are intense and passionate. But it’s because you really care and you’re very genuine. Integrity doesn’t waver. You either have it or you don’t. Theres not much middle ground. You’re so totally solid and I just love you too pieces always

I appreciate your kind hearted demeanor as well as your valuable understanding and your insight always.

Thank you for sharing when you help make everything get so much clearer!

We all really want to be better and to feel better self care, make the right choices … and have awareness and knowledge but

we are never going to achieve moral perfection so we should keep practicing above and beyond just regular connections then.


@Kellsee thank you for that empathy that is understanding and for your compassion that is caring and actually doing

something for someone.

And for your own down to earth home style country and all that is so refreshing !!

You're a Superstar like the grand ole Opry is Amazing, I mean. And don't anybody start dissin that because you will just be

wrong.


So he said to cut it out and just move on, be positive and forward or somin and stop being a karen .... so let's all be a Kellsee

instead. How about that tit for tat.

Who would expect that from just a li'ol hillbilly. Just kidding. @Kellsee . Really. I know you a Star out there.

I'm quite sure you are so likeable and wantable around here. I'm sure that tends to favor you here. And I love how amazing it is

there in Tennessee. Yeh fckng Haws.

It's not our fault about who the people we are surrounded with are. But it is up to ourselves to have our own self awareness.



~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~

Thanks for allowing so much fun and interactions with different sub forum opportunities for interacting Togethah. It makes a

more wonderful setting for being able to connect and find support through it all. And connecting so much.

~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~



But I do want to get this opportunity to say ( and thank you for @Kellsee ). I'm very grateful for all of you and for

everyone here that knows each other in this world. I am very grateful for that opportunity with you all and everyone in this

structure and so forth. And um I definitely want to say that you know even though we are always longing for a family and for

good times, and you know try to remember in your prayers and or your thoughts, if you can, for others as well.


So just keep each other in your mind and try to concentrate on what there is to be grateful for in this world instead of all the stuff

that's ripping us all apart.


One minute you are here and the next minute you can be gone so try so hard just to be grateful for what we do have.


Basically we are all not really that bad. We just all need a little fine tuning. hahaa. Except for @Kellsee . Tag you're it.

Be a Kellsee ... not karen. Rotf. !! But I do mean that, however, and I do care. Try it. It feels good.

Thank you Kel !

 

[alasdairm]

i was traveling in europe for nearly three weeks and came back and got very sick. i've been in bed for 3 days and am just beginning to feel normal again.

thanks to deathindustrial for reporting a problematic post. i understand a clarifying reply was posted in the thread in question.

there was a litany of complaints by other bluelighters in this thread and i asked those people to report problematic posts so we could take a look. no posts were reported as a result.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

alasdair

 

[mal3volent]

i was traveling in europe for nearly three weeks and came back and got very sick. i've been in bed for 3 days and am just beginning to feel normal again.

thanks to deathindustrial for reporting a problematic post. i understand a clarifying reply was posted in the thread in question.

there was a litany of complaints by other bluelighters in this thread and i asked those people to report problematic posts so we could take a look. no posts were reported as a result.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

alasdair

Pretty much everyone I know has been sick including me. Shits crazy. Glad you are on the mend.

 

[Foreigner]

Yeah this feels condescending as fuck too.

You must not have read anything I said at all. I am never rude to anybody until they start it. And then ya'll sit there & say shit like "be the change you want to see". Uhh no how about ya'll stop being assholes to people & then expecting them to be nice to you back? Pretty damn simple. Or if you have nothing nice to say, don't say it at all! Find me ONE post of mine where I just start randomly attacking some one for no reason? I'll wait.

Maybe I've only reported 3 posts in a year because reporting doesn't do jack shit, obviously?? Not to mention staffers often go back & remove their own problematic posts, so how can I report that?

There you go, I reported it!

It's in this thread - https://www.bluelight.org/community...o-refuse-illegal-orders.950359/#post-16350473
From FOREIGNER -


Foreigner - "No, just the TQ+... the LGB was not part of that. Virtually all of the controversies of the past 10 years have been TQ+ related."

So me talking about how right wingers call LGBTQ people pedophiles is me being "rude"? Candace Owens literally had an episode where she said all gay men are pedophiles, so what foreigner said is actually demonstrably false. I like how they worded as "all the controversies" for plausible deniability. When really what they're saying is they think trans & queer people deserve/bring about being called pedophiles, as if that some how justifies it. I have every right to be rude when some one feels the need to butt into everything I say to try & be condescending. They could just.... not talk to me at all? Why keep following me around & replying to everything I say if it's just to be condescending? They did this just a couple weeks before this reply too. Yeah let's blame trans & queer folks for the hateful actions of others. How "supportive" and "positive". Respect is earned, not given out to bigots. Sorry I don't take calling people PEDOPHILES lightly, alasdair. Maybe you do, but I don't.

Yup. Fuck this site. Take this gaslighting bullshit elsewhere. I'm out. Just had to spend all this time defending myself from complete & utter bullshit. You people literally live in bullshit land no matter the facts,. Some one feel free to delete my account. I've asked for it to be deleted the last time I reported some one harassing me. I really don't give a fuck. Every single one of you have done nothing but try to turn shit back around on me some how every single time. "Oh no, maybe you're the one who's rude for being tired of people's bullshit". You think I wanna log in here to get constant notifications (that I don't ask for) from people like Foreigner, "kindly" letting me know trans & queer people are bad? Wtf. Or notifications from people telling me I'm giving out false information, only to ask them what the real information is & have them repeat back to me what I literally said to begin with?!?!?! It's fucking crazy!! Clearly some of ya'll have no fuckin' lives outside of bluelight.

Not a single thing I've done for this site has ever been acknowledge by most of you staffers. Just bullshit gaslighting & telling me that I'm the problem.

FUBAR, deficit, Elektrum, numerous other people whose names are slipping my mind (cause it ain't like they're important) & now Foreigner have all gone on harassment campaigns toward me & filled my notifications up with condescending replies & attacks & then alasdair sits there & is like "be the change you want to see". HAHAHAHAHAHAH.... Yeah, it's called never harassing people or being a dick to people in the first place!!!! If some one's filling my notifications up with their bullshit & I can't even ignore or mute them, how is that MY fault? I suggest we be able to ignore/mute staffers & get met with this garbage. I think that's a reasonable request to thwart unwanted contact by people with ill-intentions. What gaslight-ey BS.

See ya!

You sure read super deeply into one line of text I wrote. This plus your last post about me are a novella of political stuff that has absolutely nothing to do with me.

I said nothing about TQ+ people. I was talking about the topic itself. Anytime "LGBTQ+" comes up in the media, online, even in an in-person discussion, the topic is actually about TQ+. LGB people are old news. We got marriage and the right to have families, so nobody talks about us anymore. Not really anyway. Even the boring straight women I know from my old job are on the TQ+ bandwagon now, the gays are no longer edgy enough. I did not place blame whatsoever. I'm gay and one of my best friends IRL is trans. I hang out in trans and queer spaces. Just went dancing at one on Saturday, in fact. You don't know anything about me to be making some of the comments you're making here. I'm also not American, so whatever US partisan echo chamber you hail from, also has got nothing to do with me. However, none of this is relevant because your diatribes are more about you than anyone else. I am not here to coddle you, give you attention, or treat you as precious. I'm not an object. I'm a human being.

This whole misunderstanding could've been resolved in the thread in question, by you simply replying to me. Instead you crafted a narrative about one line of text I said and wrote a diatribe here in a completely different sub talking about how mods are corrupt. Perhaps now, after reading what I've said above, you may actually do some self-inventory and reflect on how you judge others? Like... everything you said above about TQ+ issues would've made for some great conversation starter in CEP. Why didn't you just post it there instead of kicking up drama in this thread? I don't get it.

To the allusion that mods have special perks and we're just living it up with our amazing stupendous powers, it's simply not true. I volunteer my time here because I actually care about this site, I've been here for a very long time. I've played a part in all levels of staff. I've been active and inactive and then active again. Modding is how I choose to contribute my time here currently. The way some of you guys talk, is like the staff are some Machiavellian group sitting behind their computers, with nothing else going on in their lives, rubbing their hands together and conspiring for the next chance to screw someone over. This isn't Reddit. I have a life outside of the computer. I'm here because I believe in HR, I believe in BL, and ultimately I want to see this site survive for many more years.

Seriously, I think if some of you became mods, you would be surprised at how status quo most of the behind the scenes stuff is.

 

[Foreigner]

i was traveling in europe for nearly three weeks and came back and got very sick. i've been in bed for 3 days and am just beginning to feel normal again.

thanks to deathindustrial for reporting a problematic post. i understand a clarifying reply was posted in the thread in question.

there was a litany of complaints by other bluelighters in this thread and i asked those people to report problematic posts so we could take a look. no posts were reported as a result.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

alasdair

Ugh sorry to hear that. Same thing happened to me in Italy in September. Of all the places I've been in the world, Italy was where I got a parasite. Go figure. I hope you are starting to feel better. I hope whatever's been ailing you is moving on quickly!!

 

[kiely]

Prototypical INFP personality.

I sleep in pitch dark silence
Hoping to see your Spirit