Sort of pensive day

thujone

Bluelight Crew
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Aug 31, 2006
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This has been a year of change for me and today I was hit with the realization that next year is probably going to be similar.

In the morning I enjoyed watching the leaves fall and thinking about thanksgiving

but by night my mind was thinking about winter.

I've been fortunate this year, which makes me worry about next year.

It feels like a fluke - like I'm a fraud about to pay the karmic toll.

I've never been good with uncertainty, but I'm approaching a point in my life where I'll need to take a leap of faith.

If I do, I won't just be embracing uncertainty, I'll be signing my life over to it.

Can I live on the edge, or do I pick the safe life?
 
Hi I am not sure blogs with a question if they are intended to be answered but I think if you hold the question over your head without trying to specifically think about it and then try to answer it when the time comes, you will more naturally have the answer. I think if you try to weight the pros and cons on a decision that seems this big, you may inadvertently steer yourself in a certain direction possibly even subconsciously. And, thoughts and feelings may change from now until you have to make that decision.

You are where you are because of a long chain of your own steady decisions, which is valid to be proud about.
 
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